by Nana Malone
She nodded. “Why didn’t you tell me it was your yacht?”
“Would you have lumped me in with the rest of Adam’s bratty, rich-kid friends?”
She scrunched her nose. “Maybe. But not once we started talking.”
“I guess you live and learn.” For the next several blocks they talked about work and where they went to school.
He asked her something else he’d been dying to know. “Okay, another question for you. Why are you so anti-anything? From the sounds of it you don’t even want a relationship, or to date.”
She adjusted her laptop bag on her shoulder, and he just reached over and took it from her. “If you knew my mother, you would understand.”
“Go on, tell me.”
Elina slid him a glance. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” She shook her head. “My mother is warm and vivacious and fun. She’s also a total addict.”
Wow. Not what he’d been expecting. “I’m sorry, Elina, that must’ve been rough.”
She shook her head. “It’s not what you think. She’s addicted to love. She gets high off a new relationship. The dramatics of dating. And the dramatics of divorce. She’s been married seven times. Three of those to my father.”
Some of this he knew from Adam. But it was still unbelievable to hear. “Holy shit. Are you serious?”
“Yeah. I wish I was kidding. She has six ex-husbands.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah. So growing up, she would have a guy, then get bored, and instead of working it out, she would just divorce him.”
“That seems a little drastic.”
“You don’t know the half of it. She will invent bogus reasons for why she can no longer be with said husband. The very same reasons, mind you, that were red flags to begin with. It’s like she suddenly wakes up from the haze and realizes that she’s overdosed. But then, instead of acting like an adult and sticking it out or getting therapy, she ditches and runs. Only to repeat the same experience six months later. I really thought that last time with my father, it would stick. But it didn’t. He died a year later. She’s never been the same. I think in the long run, she thought they’d end up together.”
“Wow, that must have been insane growing up.”
“So weddings for me aren’t exactly a fairy-tale endeavor. I’ve seen too many of them. Been forced into too many bridesmaids dresses, walked my mother down the aisle too many times. I’ve watched her pour sand, light candles, break glass. All of it.”
“All right, then. I get it. No weddings. You must really love Reece to be part of hers.”
At the mention of Reece’s name, Elina’s shoulders relaxed and she beamed. “She’s seen me through many a divorce. So for her, I would do just about anything.”
“That also explains your somewhat haunted look at the ceremony.”
She shrugged. “I love Adam. I think they’re great together. I just know how easily marriages can fall apart. And with that piece of paper, things just get messier and uglier. They can be together and not get married.”
“You mean together forever.”
“Yeah, it’s kind of romantic. You know, not needing to make it official. No piece of paper will hold anyone there.”
He chuckled. “For someone who says that’s romantic, you also seem to be anti-relationship.”
“I’m not a giant fan,” she mumbled. “Last guy I dated long-term was back in college. I mostly don’t want to turn into her.”
Well, damn, that made a lot more sense. “And then you get a guy like me who won’t leave you alone.”
She laughed. “It’s not exactly like I want you to leave me alone, but now it’s complicated, very complicated. And I’m not very good at all the relationship stuff anyway.”
“You’re telling me that you haven’t had a boyfriend since college. And nobody’s giving it a shot? I find that hard to believe.”
“I date. I just don’t date often. And with my job it’s easier to focus on that. Everything with Mom was always about ‘Does he like me?’ ‘Is he into me?’ ‘How can I make him more into me?’ And I don’t want my life to be about that. There has to be something else out there.”
“Do you want your life to be all about work?”
She drew up her shoulders. “No, not exactly.”
He could tell he was making her antsy. “Well, inquiring minds want to know. I might know a million ways to make your body hum. And I also know your go-to karaoke songs, but I’m curious about you.”
“You know what they say about curiosity and the cat, right?”
Gabe grinned. “That he had a hell of a time using his nine lives?”
She laughed. “Fine, I’m not opposed to a relationship. It would be nice to come home and talk to somebody. But I also don’t want that to define me. I don’t want to be so crazy trying to hold on to a feeling that I lose myself.”
He could understand that. All his life, he watched people chase fame. And it had never made any of them happy. Even if they did manage an elusive grasp. “So as far as you’re concerned, there’s no danger in losing yourself if you never put yourself out there.”
“It’s easier that way.”
He had to laugh at that. “Oh, you call this easier?”
She chuckled, too, and bumped his shoulder with hers. “You know what I mean. Maybe this exact situation isn’t easier. But generally. Last weekend was an anomaly for me.”
Their gazes met for a prolonged moment, and his body’s response was immediate. He was so desperate to touch her. He’d even take holding her hand at the moment. But he didn’t. “Me, too, actually. I was a mess before, but I’ve cleaned up my act. Since then, you’re the first girl I’ve been with in a while. This image that everyone has of me is outdated and based on a series of half-truths. I’m not some crazy womanizer. I watched my dad run around with all these women, and he was never happy. I don’t want that.” He still remembered that day his grandmother sat him down after she caught him sneaking some girl out of her house. She’d asked him if he liked any of these women. Really liked them. Did he see himself in any of them? If they made him feel happy. Or if they were just an attempt to fill a hole. He’d never really thought about it. Women were always available. But no, so many of them he hadn’t liked. At least not enough to see them in the morning. He’d pulled back after that.
“So you mean you’re not bedding supermodels?”
Gabe grinned. “There might have been a supermodel or two in my dating past, but right now, I’m focused on building a career I can be proud of. Where I stand on my own two feet. That’s what I’m excited about. Not the latest party. Not the next model du jour. Instead, something real.”
“So you don’t take all women into your secret karaoke room?”
He laughed. “Nope. You’re the only woman I’ve taken down there. I rarely ever use it. You were fun, and I liked you.”
She squirmed. “And now everything is mad complicated.”
“You can say that again,” he muttered.
“So how come you don’t want to go back to acting? I viewed your film reel. You were really good.”
It had been a long time since anyone referred to him as a good actor. It had been a long time since anyone had referred to him as a good anything. “Thank you. I used to love it. But all the comparisons to Dad, it didn’t make me happy. Hell, it never did. I eventually did things I thought would make me happier.”
They made a left at Bleecker Street Pizza. “How did that work out for you?”
“These days there’s this handy thing called the internet. If you look back about three years and Google my name, you can see for yourself how happy it made me.”
“So now you’re trying something different?” She slid her gaze over him, and the simple glance was enough to make his muscles bunch and his skin
prickle with heat. “It looks good on you.”
“So what you’re saying is, you think I’m hot.”
She bumped him again as she laughed. Yes, more contact. It was official, he needed help. “I said no such thing.”
“Really? Because that’s what I heard in my head. Gabe is totally hot.” He tapped his temple. “The Elina that lives in my head, that’s what she says.”
“Let me guess, in your head she’s wearing a lot less clothing?”
He put a hand over his heart. “You wound me. In my head, she’s wearing red.”
Her skin flushed light pink under that pretty brown skin. She stopped walking in front of a dark wrought-iron gate. “This is me.”
Beyond the gate sat a lush courtyard. He could see the inner doorway from where they stood.
He’d been in this position a million times, facing a beautiful woman, determining if she wanted him to kiss her or not. But this wasn’t a date, was it? “Well, Elina, it was fun getting to know you.”
Her smile was shy as she tucked her hair behind her ear. “Yeah, it was. And I owe you an apology for the first day. And for Sunday morning. I shouldn’t have left like that.” She paused. “I was being a coward. And that wasn’t fair.”
He nodded. “It’s okay. I get it. I’ve snuck out of more beds than I should probably admit to. And I was as dumbstruck as you were. I’d just promised Delilah I wouldn’t mess with women and be the picture of propriety. Then you walked in. So yeah.”
She looked down at her feet. “Well, good night.”
He was so desperate to kiss her. Just one taste was all he needed. Though who was he kidding? One taste and he’d be carrying her upstairs, and he wouldn’t let her out for days. So for once, Gabe did the smart thing. He leaned into her, but instead of kissing her sweet, soft lips, he kissed her on the cheek, then forced himself to pull back. “Good night, Elina. I’ll see you Monday.”
Chapter 9
Elina rolled over in her bed. This was Gabe’s fault. She hadn’t slept a wink all night, tossing and turning, thinking about his infectious crooked smile and those ridiculously amazing eyes of his. It wasn’t fair. Why couldn’t she just quash that fluttery feeling she got every time she was around him?
This last week had been torture. Seeing him every other day and sometimes working late with him had her ready to climb the walls. It was one thing to have him around. It was a whole other thing to catch him watching her. Her skin would prickle with awareness when she looked up to meet his gaze. It was too easy to get trapped in his hypnotic eyes.
And then, predictably, she’d lose her train of thought and look like a moron in front of the boss she was trying to impress. More than once, Willow asked if she was okay.
Elina dragged a pillow over her eyes. If she could just get him out of her head and forget about every touch, every lingering caress, every kiss, the way he watched her as they made love.
More than once this week, she had some flash memory of that night. All it would take was a shy smirk, a look, his laugh; basically, all he had to do was stand there and she was assaulted with memories of that night.
Her phone rang on her nightstand and she dragged her pillow off to see who was calling. She didn’t know why she bothered; the only person who would call this early was her mother. “Hi, Mama.”
“Oh, there you are, baby. I called you yesterday. Didn’t you get my messages?”
Elina sighed. It was far too early in the morning for this conversation. “I was working, Mom, what’s up?”
“Honestly, darling, it sounds like you’re still in bed.”
“Mom, it’s six thirty in the morning. You’re in Toronto, it’s the same time for you there. Six thirty is too early to call someone.”
“Oh, sweetheart, I’ve been awake for ages. Early morning really is the best time for yoga. I’ve got this new yogi. He’s very cute so it helps motivate me to get out of bed.”
Oh my God. Dealing with her mother before coffee seemed like cruel and unusual punishment. “Are you just calling to chat, Mom? Because if you are, then let me call you back when I’m more awake.”
“What’s the matter with you, Elina? You’re usually more sprightly in the morning.”
Elina forced herself to sit up. It might be too early in the morning to talk to her mother, but for some reason she wasn’t as irritated as she normally was. Maybe because you understand her a little now. “I didn’t sleep that well.”
“It’s that job, sweetheart. I’m telling you. You’re too young to spend all your days working.”
Elina couldn’t help but sputter a laugh. “Mom, now is the time to work my butt off so I can relax later. Now is the time I have energy. Besides, I’m not stressed out about my job. I love my job. And my boss is going give me my own client soon. I’m just tired.”
Her mother gasped. “The only thing that will keep a woman up like that is a man. Elina Sinclair, do you have a boyfriend? Will wonders never cease. Who is he? Tell me everything!”
Oh no. Elina flashed back to when she got her first boyfriend in high school. All of a sudden, her mother wanted to chat with her about who the cutest boys in school were. There was no way she was discussing her sex life with her mother. It didn’t matter how cool her mother thought she was. “I don’t have a boyfriend, Mom.”
“Well, that just astounds me, because there is no reason a pretty girl like you shouldn’t have a boyfriend.”
“I don’t want one, Mom. I’m good on my own.”
“Yes, but sweetheart, a woman has needs.”
Elina felt a wave of nausea wash over her. “We are not talking about this. I have to go.” She shuddered.
“Yes, yes, darling, of course you don’t want to discuss your love life with me, but if you change your mind I’m a great resource.”
“Ewww. Mom!”
“Fine, but I am calling for a reason.”
Elina’s relaxed goodwill was rapidly evaporating. “Yeah, what is it?”
“I wanted to let you know that I’m getting married again. To Luke. My yogi. We’re going to do a very simple, nonmaterialistic, nondenominational ceremony. But obviously I need my best maid of honor there.”
Too numb to speak, all Elina could do was force her lungs to work. Married. Again. After that last time with her father, her mother had insisted she was never getting married again. Elina should have known that was too good to be true.
After several attempts, she finally found her voice. “So I should ignore all that stuff you said after you divorced Daddy. That I should stop you if you said you wanted to get married again?”
“Oh, sweetheart. You know how I get. At those moments, all I can see is the bad. So what do you say? We still have some time, but you’ll make yourself available to be my maid of honor?”
And because she knew she had no choice, Elina whispered, “Sure, Mom. I’ll be your maid of honor.” She’d been through this cycle before. Hopefully, her mother would gain some sense before the actual wedding date. Elina could only hope.
Chapter 10
On Wednesday, Gabe passed Elina the popcorn before hitting Playback on the video. “So I had my two favorite actors, both unknown, just sit down and do a table read of the first few scenes so I could get a feel for how it flows.”
Elina took a handful of popcorn and pushed the bowl back, careful not to touch him. “These actors are really good. Where did you find them?”
He stifled the disappointment. “They’re actually NYU students. I saw them at a showcase about a year ago. I have worked with one of the guys’ older brother before and he turned me on to his brother’s work.”
“Seriously, Gabe, these guys are future breakout stars.”
“Thanks. I’m lucky they want to work with me.”
“That says a lot about the script.”<
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He tried not to let the compliment go to his head. But he loved that Elina was excited about his work, that she believed in him.
It had been a battle for him not to call her over the weekend. Just to talk or hang out, or maybe get naked. No. No getting naked. As much as he wanted her, Delilah was already making strides with his reputation and he didn’t want to risk making her angry. She’d already managed to get him a sit-down with several studio executives. The same studios, when his manager called, they’d given them the run around. Now he was at the table. And it was far better to be there than be on the phone begging someone for a meeting.
But, even as Elina avoided touching him or looking directly at him, he could tell something was wrong. They’d made progress on Friday night. They were sort of friends now, right?
“You want to tell me what’s bugging you? You’ve been off all day. When I saw you Monday you were quiet, something I’m learning is unusual for you. Do you need to talk to Reece?” Maybe this was some kind of best-friend emergency or something.
Elina shook her head. “Nah, this’ll keep.”
She shut down the DVD player and straightened her files. “Remember, we’ve booked you for the Montreal and Toronto film festivals. Delilah turned over every contact she had and called in a lot of favors. You’ll sit on a panel in Montreal, specifically discussing the relationship between actor and director and how you plan to put your spin on it with your project. You also have several interviews about your project while you’re there. Toronto is a month after that and we’ll do the same thing. Build the buzz.”
“Yeah, okay. Sounds great. But I’m not worried about that right now. Right now I’m worried about you. What’s wrong?”
Elina’s gaze flickered to the door. Delilah had gone home for the night, but Willow was in the apartment next door to the office. “I don’t want to talk about it here, okay? I just want to go home, take off my shoes and pass out.”
“Do you want to grab food or something? Maybe some takeout?” Damn, he sounded desperate. He wanted to spend time with her, so he’d do what it took. “Good thing we have the whole walk back to your place to decide.” Sooner or later she was going to talk to him. He might as well help her make it sooner.