Dreams Ltd

  Stopped listening to the radio, I have pushed the empty bowl away and looked at Tabitha.

  “Is there a casino in Tally?”

  “Yes,” she said, “anyone can play there, but nobody has won anything as far as I know. Do you know how many idiots believe in miracles? They think that Lady Luck will smile at them and save them from Tally in minutes; therefore they spin and spin these wheels digging a deeper and deeper hole. And when they eventually realise that they are in a massive in minus, it’s too late...”

  Today Tabitha was unusually talkative.

  “Is there a limit to a negative score?” I asked her.

  “No, there isn’t. But never you go there, do you hear me?” she warned me, shaking her head, “Do not even think about it no matter what anyone says.”

  “I wasn’t going to.”

  “Believe me, you don’t need that. They will let you in, of course, because anyone can go in, but then they come out feet first, or like that guy - jump down the bridge.”

  She shook her head again and I, despite the heat this morning, shivered.

  What a well-thought-out system! Someone must have had a great murky imagination creating it. People always believed in luck and therefore millions and millions were spent in casinos and lost, but yet people keep on believing in it. Their hope for a miracle stays alive when everything inside is dead. I felt petrified imagining what it would be like to come out from the casino in the morning, when there are about minus three thousand on your bracelet... I shuddered from this picture of the terrible Tally, got up, put my bowl in the sink, and then cleared up the crumbs from the table.

  “OK, I’m off.”

  Tabitha, listening to the radio, just nodded.

  “OK. If you are late for lunch, I’ll leave the food in the fridge.”

  I went into the quiet courtyard that boarded with a garden, pleasantly stretched my body and looked around. The day, oddly enough, was calm and quiet and watching how the morning sun gilding the green leaves with a golden shimmer, my spirits improved. I tried to recall what kind of duties I had today and it seemed there wasn’t many. I had to scrape the front yard, bring some bundles stacked in the cart to the barn by the far field and deliver the food to the quarry. That was, sort of, it. But was it really? I felt like something important was slipping away from my mind and tried to rummage through my memory again. Oh, right! I have to visit Hulk’s office this afternoon, so we could continue our heart-to-heart conversation.

  Weirdly enough, this idea made me worry but also feel something odd... something sweet and viscous... For a while I was anxiously wondering what the exact feeling it was, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. Even though it was something incompatible with the logic, almost alien, I didn’t hurry to get rid of it - it was as if a drop of water dew fell on the parched by worries surface of my soul and made me hope that something miraculous could happen.

  I shook my head. What is going on with me? Rummaging in the depths of my consciousness on the subject "is this a panic from the fear of meeting Hulk?" and, strangely enough, not being able to determine any of it, I let myself smile. I walked to the corner of the house to visit the pantry first and get a couple of scrubbing brushes which were suitable for cleaning the yard.

  Before I knew it was time for lunch the heat increased. After I returned from the quarry with the cart and empty barrel, I glanced at the clock hanging on the kitchen wall and discovered that it was almost three o’clock and went to take a shower feeling the need to wash off the dust from my skin and clean my clothes before going to Hulk’s office. Since I wasn’t sure when exactly he was expecting me, I decided to turn up right now. I’d rather be early, than late. A strange feeling of some upcoming changes would not leave me even for a second, though I couldn’t find any real reasons for it. In my heart I had already accepted the future loss of my hard-earned twenty points and now it would be just silly to worry about it. I didn’t manage to collect a large amount of point anyway and therefore I couldn’t hope to leave Tally anytime soon. Somewhere in the back of mind I came to terms with my situation and realised that it was time for me to start learning how to make my life more or less bearable here.

  At half past three I knocked on the door on the second floor.

  “Come in.” I heard the voice of the owner of this heavenly oasis.

  I went in and paused at the door, not knowing whether I should go and sit on the sofa like yesterday or it will be regarded as a gross violation of subordination today. Not being able to come to any conclusion, I made a couple of steps forward and halted.

  Hulk was dressed in a pale yellow shirt, unbuttoned down to the middle of his chest; the sleeves were rolled up to the elbows. His blonde hair was neatly combed back, and his whole appearance was a proof that spending time on his own villa was a pleasant and not burdensome pastime for him.

  “I wouldn’t like to sit in a room, how about a little walk and some fresh air?”

  He asked me in such a caring way as if he wasn’t a slave owner, but an average man who’d just innocently invited a lady to go for an ice-cream and seriously thinks that she might decline his offer.

  “Of course.” I said politely, wistfully thinking that the sun at this time of the day was still roasting like hell and it will be quite hard to get any “fresh” air. I seriously doubted that there was any place in this ever sizzling desert that I could find pleasant enough for a walk, but I didn’t dare to say it aloud.

  We went outside and headed towards the fields where I could see the workers’ naked backs. To my relief the groans or any other sounds could not be heard from here, and that made me feel a bit better.

  Hulk was walking slowly, as if deeply in thought and I was walking by his side brushing against the leaves of some high similar to corn plants with my trousers. There was a hot breeze now touching our faces, ruffling my unruly, still damp from the shower hair and swaying the collar of my companion’s shirt. In fact, the walk was nicer than I was expecting and the heat wasn’t too much.

  “So, you can read Tueric.” finally broke the long silence Hulk.

  I nodded absently, looking at my feet.

  “Yes, I can. But only very slowly and I would need to use a dictionary, because I lost a lot of my knowledge without the practice.”

  “Uh-huh.” he said, agreeing, “I have a dictionary, so it is not a problem.”

  For a while he was quite again. We continued with our stroll getting further away from the house, walked round the edge of the field and carried along a narrow road leading somewhere to the mountains. My thoughts were flowing sluggishly and fragmentally, as if from too much heat they stuck in kind of a jelly and now were warming up and resting in there. The haze was quivering on the horizon making the red mountain look unreal.

  “I would like to change your occupation here for a while.” said Hulk looking at me. His eyes were pale, almost whitish and not grey or golden, as they sometimes seemed in the light of an evening sunset.

  When had I noticed that?

  I forced myself to stop thinking about stupid but captivating things and asked.

  “Change to what?”

  “I want you to start translating two books you saw in my office. You see, I find them very interesting and I'm pretty certain that they contain some valuable information about how to improve many working areas on the ranch, but I don’t have time to do it myself. Therefore I thought that you might prefer it to the hard work in the yard.”

  I was taken aback by his words. On one hand the idea of living here doing something enjoyable was very tempting but on the other ... who would take the food to the stone-pit? If it was someone else then the workers would starve again. And if I stop wandering around the infirmary doing different tasks, I won’t find a way to steal those bloody patches and medications because my presence there will be too noticeable. And then Greg will certainly find a reason to ask me a couple of questions.

  Lost in my thoughts over this dilemma, I didn’t notice that Hulk was watc
hing me all this time.

  Not understanding the reasons for my heavy silence or perhaps understanding them very well, he continued.

  “I'll pay you and I’ll pay you well. For each translated sheet you will receive one point.”

  I gawped at him.

  “No, no...” he corrected himself right away,” we’ll split this… I'll pay you one point per sheet, but it won’t be your usual points. I'll give you another bracelet, which they will be credited on to...”

  My joy darkened and I shivered, imagining that instead of one bracelet, I will now have two. What a happy life! Why would I need points which are not counted as “freedom” points?

  “Hear me out first.” gently smiled Hulk, watching my face reflect a whirlpool of various emotions, “You can spend these points in Tally totally at your discretion. For food, clothes or whatever else you want. I just can’t allow them to be your “freedom” points, I hope you understand.”

  I nodded feeling puzzled and trying to understand how I could benefit from such a deal. Then my heart jumped from the understanding and sudden burst of hope, and my head began creating an amazing idea.

  “For each page.”

  “What?”

  “One point per page?” I explained, “If I can’t use them to get my freedom, then you are not really bothered how many you give me, right?”

  I know how to get a good bargain, if I want to, I thought pondering about how many pages there were in those two books. I hoped at least three hundred- four hundred in each.

  Hulk's eyes narrowed. For a split second it seemed that he’d refuse. But then he relaxed and just said,

  “OK. But you’ll have to do me a favour.”

  Not having time to get excited properly, I tensed up again.

  “What kind of a favour?”

  “You’ll have to tell me why you were brought to Tally. For what? The truth.”

  I nearly swore out loud. And then suddenly realised - why am I so worried about that? If he wants to know, I’ll tell him; anyway, he knows now I’m not a hacker and I didn’t swear to the Commission to keep this a secret. I even felt relieved after my conclusion. How many times did I want to share the true story with someone? But there weren’t any true friends around or anyone who’d listen to me. If he doesn’t believe me - he wouldn’t be the first or the last, so I stopped worrying.

  “OK. I’ll tell you.”

  It was now Hulk’s turn to display his surprise, but this quickly changed to an expression of satisfaction, and then to his usual inscrutable look. So far, our negotiation was going well. I was afraid to take another breath, in order not to scare the luck away.

  “And what about...” I paused, not willing to touch the nasty subject, but it was necessary, “what about... those whips?”

  To my relief, Hulk just shrugged.

  “What about them? The old ones were thrown away and new ones ordered.”

  I was staring at his face, waiting for the words about the twenty points I could lose, to come, but Hulk, oddly enough, just smiled again.

  “We have now come to a mutual beneficial cooperation. Isn’t that right? Why would I want to spoil it?”

  He looked right through me and I got a sense of comfort because everything’s just suddenly became clear - he won’t be punishing me and everyone on the ranch will keep their points, including me. If someone had told me that such an outcome could even be possible last night when I was standing in the yard, listening to Greg’s threats, I would have just laughed or I’d get upset because such a beautiful fantasy had no chances of coming true. And now I was almost flying! What a change!

  I still could not believe my luck - who knew that my knowledge of the Tueric language would become handy one day! In the “Area 33”! Such absurdities made me giggle; just as well Hulk didn’t seem to pay any attention to that.

  Once again we turned left and walked along the field; on the opposite side of the road there was some kind of a woodland belt. The crowns of the rare trees were faintly rustling; I’d never walked that far on my own before. The mansion as well as the fields with the workers’ naked backs was now out of sight and only the wind was playing with withered leaves and bowing the stalks of the cobs down to the ground along with the chirring crickets. At some point our whole trip began to seem like an abstract dream which I didn’t mind. Ever since I arrived at Tally there hasn’t been that many pleasant experiences in my life and each positive emotion that accidentally visited me here was appreciated as much as gold. And this walk felt good, even if it was passing by in silence.

  “Where will I be doing the translating?”

  “In your room” Hulk was surprised by my question.

  “But there is no electricity.”

  He looked at me and his eyes stared heavily at me. Somehow I knew that I wasn’t the reason for such intensity and it was about someone else, who seemingly forgot to mention to Hulk about such a small detail as the lack of electricity in my room.

  “It will get sorted.” He said in a plain voice.

  I happily inhaled the hot air saturated with a scent of different plants. Wow, this really is the day of the miracles!

  “Hulk ...” unexpectedly even for myself I said, trying to recall if I’d ever called him by his name.

  “Yes?”

  I wasn’t sure how to proceed, but for some reason this exact little favour I was about to ask him was particularly important for me.

  “In my room there is a door which leads to the same place as the kitchen - to the backyard with a fence.”

  Hulk was looking at me blankly.

  “This door is always shut. Can I please get a key? This is not because I want to escape or anything, I just... I’d just like to sit on my own sometimes on a little porch and get some fresh air since the windows in my room cannot be opened.”

  It seemed that Hulk was surprised by something yet again, although it was not easy to read your everyday human emotions on his face.

  “You'll get the key tonight when you come to pick up the book and the dictionary.” these were the only words he said.

  Now I was taking my every step very carefully, so that he wouldn’t notice that instead of walking I was flying above the ground with happiness.

  The same evening I went to Hulk’s office to pick up two heavy books, dictionary, new thick notebook, some pens, some other stationary and received the second bracelet which was now attached to my wrist right next to the first one - the one that’s not only given me blisters on my skin, but on my heart as well. However I was quite happy about having the second bracelet knowing that all the future points - though I won’t be able to use them for my freedom, will bring some joy into my life.

  As it turned out, while I was busy outside doing my tasks, electricity had already came on in my room, and not just the electricity but also unpretentious round chandelier on the ceiling as well as a desk lamp with a beige shade on the table. I clicked the switch several times, turning the light on and off, watching how this uncomplicated movement completely changes the look of my pathetic room. Then I checked that the chandelier was functioning properly and stood in the doorway for a little bit, savouring the change and gently stroking the books. I’d never ever expected that my student whim would bring so much into my life, but it did and much more than I ever dared to receive. Eventually I shut the door and went to the kitchen to get my supper.

  I can say that from that very moment my life in Tally began to feel if not enjoyable, but at least acceptable. For days I was carefully copying the translated text in the notebook; Hulk had decided that my handwriting was readable, and the dictionary I was provided with was a considerable help. It turned out that by then I’d managed to forget about a half of what I had once known. But the endless turning of pages was not burdening, the routine was not frightening and perseverance has always been one of my best qualities. The first thing I did when I got the book was to check how many pages in total there was and then I became very happy. The first volume consisted of
five hundred and ninety pages and the second one as much as seven hundred and thirty pages! After that it became obvious why Hulk refused to put anything on my ordinary bracelet, because if he did – I’d fly out of Tally at the speed of light.

  Though to say so would be an exaggeration, especially considering the fact that each page was not particularly easy to translate and I had to make tremendous efforts so that the words extracted from my memory or from the dictionary would build into meaningful sentences. And in some section there was a talk about buildings, machines or units, of which I’d never heard of before then it would become very tricky. But Hulk was reading everything with great interest even if I was bringing him only half a page a day. He also never hurried me and I was grateful for that.

  So I was taking my time in the tiny room, drawing the words with the blue ink in my thick notebook, sometimes I would sit there and pondering, lost in my thoughts about something irrelevant and then I return back to work. Considering the fact that I didn’t even need to go in the dining room - a warm spot in the Tabitha’s kitchen was always at my disposal, it soon began to feel that I lived in a almost normal world and there is no ranch, no workers around and nothing at all. If it wasn’t for my clothes shop that I’d usually check up on once a day in my life before Tally and for the shabby interior which was very different to my apartment I left on West Barton Avenue, I could think that I’m living an ordinary life. Of course, it was a rough comparison, but still...