by Bankes, Liz
Chapter 29
“Ha! What are you doing, you freak?”
I was sitting on the low brick wall outside Gabi’s house and must have fallen asleep. I had my head on my knees, so I probably did look a little weird.
Then Gabi’s mom comes barreling past me, chattering away on her phone, and doesn’t even notice me. I follow them to the car.
At school, Gabi manages to persuade her mom to wait in the car rather than accompany us for the actual grades part.
“Oh, go on. That’s right. You girls have your moment!” She squeezes my hand and grins at me.
Gabi’s already started toward the entrance, and I run to catch up with her.
“You look dead,” she says.
“Oh, thanks, Gabs.”
We find the rest of the gang and have a huge group hug. A few people say how they haven’t seen me in forever, but soon we slip into normal conversations and gossip and we collect our envelopes. We’re all opening them together. We count to three.
There’s a flurry of screaming and waving papers around. Lots of As and A-pluses are flying back and forth. Most of us got a C in media, but to be fair, we spent the majority of those classes making videos of the adventures of a little LEGO man we found. I skim mine. Mostly Bs. A couple of As. An A-plus in food tech, which is an absolute joke.
I don’t really feel anything. I know I’ve passed everything, but my mind’s still running through how I can get out.
We’re interrupted by a man with a camera who seems to be looking for blond people he can take pictures of opening their results and jumping in the air. He says he’s from the local newspaper, which hopefully is true and he’s not just a pervert. That’s when I realize that Gabi hasn’t said anything. She’s just staring at her grades.
I stand next to her.
“I didn’t pass,” she says quietly. “I didn’t get five Bs. I got a …” Her voice wobbles, and she swallows. “I got a D in math.”
She looks around at all the whooping and excited chatter. “I thought I’d … I’d made it up.”
She has her head down and her shoulder bowed. I’ve never seen her looking this crushed. It is sort of taken for granted that everyone at our school will pass their exams and then stay on for the next two years to do A-Levels. There’s a community college where you can do your A-Levels, but if we all stay at school she’ll be going on her own.
“They might let you in,” I say. “Or you can go to the community college. Or do something else. I was thinking of—”
She interrupts me. “You’ve got the option, though.”
We’re silent for a while. I squeeze her hand, and she puts her head on my shoulder. I feel hot tears soaking into my dress.
“I don’t want to go to the party anymore,” she says, her voice tight. “Can we do something? Just you, me, Max, and Dan?”
“Yeah,” I say. “Of course.”
She lifts her head. “Oh, I know, we should have a meal! At your work. Don’t you get a really good discount? And WINE.”
A weight drops in my stomach. She looks at me expectantly, her eyes still wet with tears.
“Yep, sure.” I nod.
“Call them now!” she says.
With every ring I’m willing Dan not to answer. I wanted to get away from that place for a night. I don’t even know how I’m supposed to act around Jamie. Or Cleo.
“Good morning, Radleigh Castle Restaurant. Dan speaking. How may I help?”
Oh, good.
Chapter 30
“What’s foy grass? Anyway, I’ll have a bottle of the sove.”
Gabi addresses the first question to no one in particular, but her drink order to Melanie, who is our waitress.
“One bottle of the Soave,” says Melanie sweetly, making a point of saying “Soave” in an Italian accent. “How many glasses?”
“Just a straw,” says Gabi. Then she sees Melanie’s shocked expression. “Kidding! Two. For me and Mi. Ha! That’s me and her, not myself twice.”
Since we got the grades, Gabi’s gone into overdrive.
Dan orders a beer, and Max asks for a glass of Rioja.
We all look at him in shock.
“What?” he says. “My mom gives it to me with meals.”
We suppress our laughter at Max as Melanie arches an eyebrow and writes down our order. Dan’s eighteen, so technically we’re accompanied by an adult, and we are eating, but it still feels a little sketchy ordering alcohol. I wish we’d gotten a different waitress.
I’m sure I hear her give a world-weary sigh as she struts back off to the kitchen.
When the first course arrives, Gabi proposes a toast. “GCSEs can suck it!” She cheers and we all clink glasses. I see a few guests turn around and look at us, but thankfully Julia isn’t around. The instant I think that, she walks into the room. Following her are a large woman with cropped blond hair and an upturned nose and an equally large girl with long blond hair and a similarly upturned nose, who must be her daughter. They stand in the corner while Julia and the older woman point at different places in the room and the girl fiddles with a notepad.
They drift past us, still talking.
“But we can’t have the food table there; it will be too near the DJ,” squawks the large woman, putting the emphasis on the “J” of “DJ.”
“Don’t have a DJ,” says Gabi through a mouthful of bread.
“I’m sorry?” says the woman.
Julia’s eyes flash dangerously, and I kick Gabi under the table, but she ignores me.
“Don’t have a DJ,” she says. “It’s so gauche. He’ll play eighties’ crap that no one young has heard of. Rent a jukebox and let the guests pick the music they want to hear.”
The girl’s eyes light up and she whispers, “Oh, Mom, I’d like a jukebox.”
“Yeah, and then you’ll have more money for champagne.” Gabi smiles.
“It does sound ‘trendy,’ doesn’t it?” says the mom, doing a little jig. “Write it down, Mary.”
Her daughter grins excitedly and scribbles on the pad.
“Thank you!” says the mom and waddles off to do more organizing.
Julia turns to the table. “Yes, thank you … ?”
“Gabi,” says Gabi.
Julia nods. “And are you enjoying your dinner, Gabi?”
“Yeah,” says Gabi, “although you should have a dinner deal. I’d be paying out of my ass for this if we didn’t have Mia’s discount.”
“Noted,” says Julia, her face unreadable.
“And the shrimp is small. Omigod, Mia, do you remember when I thought that was all shrimp was and I didn’t know they’d had the heads and legs taken off and I was all, ‘But where’s its brain?’” She turns to Julia. “It was so funny.”
Julia smiles her serial-killer smile.
“So we’ll call you if we want anything, right?” says Gabi, and I widen my eyes in shock.
But Julia just nods. “Of course,” she says and walks away.
Gabi looks at my face. “What?” she says. Then light dawns. “Oh my God, is that the one who’s a total bitch?”
Julia, who is only a few yards away, pauses for a split second and then continues walking.
I finish off my glass of wine in one gulp.
Chapter 31
After the meal, we walk out onto the terrace. Ever so slightly tipsy, Gabi clings to me.
“It’s frigging beautiful here.” She sighs. “You guys are lucky.”
Dan and I look at each other. “Yeah, we are, I suppose,” he says.
“Good evening,” says a voice, and my heart stops.
“I understand you’re celebrating,” continues Jamie’s cool voice.
“Drowning our sorrows,” says Gabi. “I messed up my exams,” she adds confidentially.
“Well, we’re having a little party down there.” He nods toward the pool house. “You’d all be very welcome. I’m Jamie, by the way.”
“Gabi. We’ve met.” Gabi goes forward and kisses him on bot
h cheeks. Max goes to fist-bump him, and Jamie just looks at him curiously. He turns to me.
“Do I get a kiss from you too?”
I stand on tiptoe and awkwardly align my cheek with his, aiming just to bump them together, but he moves around and the kiss gets the side of my mouth. I glare at him as he greets Dan, standing behind me.
“Hello, Kitchen Dan.”
Dan just nods.
Jamie points toward the pool house. “Shall we? We’re just about to pass the port.”
I had an insane, delusional hope that Gabi might say she’s tired and it’s high time we went home, but she’s already hobbling down the path in her heels, yelling, “Save some for me!”
Max shrugs and says, “What my lady wants …” and then follows her.
Jamie looks at us questioningly.
Dan puts his arm around me. “Yeah, we’ll be along in a minute,” he says. I feel a twinge of annoyance at him.
Jamie widens his eyes. “Play safe.” And then he’s gone.
I step away from Dan’s arm.
“Hey, Mia, can I talk to you?”
I turn to face him but don’t want to look him in the eye. Instead, it now looks like I’m very interested in his sleeve.
“Mia?”
“Yeah.”
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah, fine.”
“You’ve been a little quiet.”
“Oh, no, I’m just tired.”
“Okay. I was worried. This morning I found you hiding under a table. I just wanted to make sure everything was all right.”
I can feel my resolve wobbling. I was going to tell him we should just be friends. But as I look in his eyes, the words are slipping farther and farther away.
“It’s just … I don’t think …”
He looks at me, his eyebrows raised in genuine concern. Everything about Dan is genuine. And warm. And caring.
“Don’t put your arm around me just because there’s some other guy around. It’s like you’re saying I’m yours or something.”
Dan nods gravely. “Like I’m pissing on you.”
It completely breaks the tension, and we dissolve into laughter.
“Yes, just like that.”
He nods. “Sorry. I know it was a little dickish. That guy just gets to me a bit. He’s pretty full of himself.”
I consider all the things I could say. You’ve got nothing to worry about. You’re ten times better than him. Instead I say, “If it makes you feel any better, he’s pretending he got into college.”
As soon as it’s out of my mouth, I want to reel it back in. This is one of those moments—and I have many of them—when I wish there was an undo button in real life.
“Seriously? Why the hell’s he doing that? Ha! That does make me feel better, actually.”
Shit. Shit. Shit. “Don’t say anything, though.” There’s a desperate tinge to my voice.
“No, ’course not.”
And my thumping heart slows a little.
“Mia, there was something else I wanted to say.”
We walk into the pool house a few minutes later, holding hands. And the first person we see is Cleo. I meet her eyes, and guilt thumps through me. She takes note of the handholding and looks like she’s carefully selecting her words. There’s a glint of danger in her eyes.
“Your friend’s fun,” she says eventually, gesturing behind her. Gabi is up on a table, leading a vigorous dance to Rihanna. Behind her, an enthusiastic Max appears to be teaching people how to rap.
“Yeah, she is,” I say, feeling fiercely proud. This is Gabi’s night, and I don’t want my dramas to ruin it. I walk around the table and Gabi grabs my hands. We dance to the end of the song with her still on the table and me on the floor. The next song is one Gabi doesn’t like, so she announces that she’s going for a pee. Dan’s gone to see if he can find any drinks, and so I sit down next to Max on the sofa.
“You guys like the drama, don’t you?” I say to him.
“Yeah, man,” he replies. “Messes with my head sometimes, but I couldn’t be without it, you know what I mean?”
“So it’s worth it? All the fighting and stuff?”
“Yeah, ’course,” he tells me. “We argue, like, every week, but I’d never go near anyone else. I totally love that girl.”
It’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard Max say. And then he ruins it by adding, “You get me?”
I sigh. There’ve been times when I’ve been mean about Gabi and Max and their shouting matches and passionate public making-up sessions. But at least it’s honest. This morning I was going to cool things off with Dan, and now, following our talk on the terrace, I think we might be “officially going out.” If I could just stick with that, I’d be happy. I look over at Jamie. Happy, instead of scared, nervous, uncertain … excited.
There’s a slight commotion at the door. Melanie walks in, Simon shuffling in her wake. She waves at us.
“Thought we’d come and see what all the fuss is about!” She turns to Simon. “See, Si, it would be perfect for the reception.”
I don’t know if it has occurred to her that Jamie lives here and might not let his house be invaded for a wedding.
A whoop comes from the other side of the room. We both turn to see Gabi heading back from the bathroom. As if to illustrate Max’s point, she gets called over by Jamie’s friend Guy, and when he attempts to grope her, she slaps him. She runs back over and vaults into Max’s lap.
Dan appears a minute later, drinkless, which is probably a good thing. We’ve now taken over the sofa. The sofa I’ve slept on. Gabi lies across us.
“I LOVE you guys,” she says. “Can I sleep here?”
In unison we reply “No” and roll her off. And then the music stops as a bored voice rings through the pool house.
“I’d like to play a little game.”
Chapter 32
“It’s lovely to see you here, Melanie,” says Jamie. “And Simon.”
Melanie looks a little surprised to be singled out. Simon looks terrified.
“Wedding plans going well?”
“Oh, fantastic,” says Melanie, and then rambles on about how they’re looking into having it at Radleigh, because it’s classic, you know? Jamie yawns, but it doesn’t deter her. Then I notice Simon. He’s shaking his head. And then he mouths, “Please.” At Jamie.
“That’s wonderful, really. I’m not surprised, because Simon has been sending me some very enthusiastic texts.”
Melanie’s cheeriness falters slightly. “Really?”
“Really.” Jamie smiles innocently. “Although, I have to say I found them rather confusing. Is it your ‘magnificent penis’ he wants me to send a picture of? I wasn’t aware you had one.”
Melanie and Simon don’t say anything. Jamie reads out Simon’s messages to the amusement of some of the room, particularly Guy. Some of the words make Melanie turn and look at Simon. They clearly sound like things Simon would say. Some people look shocked. Cleo, sitting with Nish and Effy, looks bored.
Simon looks heartbroken. I wonder what Jamie said to him that day Simon marched off to confront him. It must have started then. He’s obviously hooked Simon in and gotten him to let loose these feelings that now seem completely crazy.
Jamie’s good at that, I think. And the thought chills me.
Eventually Melanie turns and walks out of the room. Simon pauses for a moment, looks sadly at Jamie, and then follows her.
There’s no big shouting match this time. It’s clear their relationship is broken.
The four of us on the sofa have been sitting in silence, but then Gabi finds her voice.
“What the hell was that about?” she shrieks.
Dan stands up. “This is messed up.” He shakes his head and heads for the door.
Gabi, Max, and I all get up to go with him. We’re just getting to the pool when a voice calls out, “Joseph, wait.”
Dan and Max are already too far away to hear, but Gabi, who’s just ahead of m
e, stops and turns around too.
“I need to speak to you,” Jamie says to me.
“Um … why?” Gabi asks.
“Gabi, it’s fine. I … We won’t be long.”
“Okay …,” she says slowly. “I’ll go get a taxi and come back for you in a minute, okay?”
As her footsteps fade, Jamie looks at me with his arms crossed.
“Swimming tonight?”
“You must be kidding.”
“Someone told me I don’t make jokes.”
“You just wrecked someone’s relationship. For no reason. They weren’t some horrible old couple who had it coming. They did nothing to you.”
“Because it’s all fake,” he snaps. “It’s classic wedding venues and personalized phone cases and going through the stages—university, jobs, marriage, babies—and none of it’s real. We do it because we should.”
“But they were happy.”
“Are you happy?”
“What? Yes. I’m really happy. Dan’s … He’s invited me to go to Paris with him at the end of the summer. We’re really … going out now.”
Jamie’s face is unreadable. “I look forward to seeing your phone case.”
“Right. So, can I go now?”
Jamie laughs to himself.
“What?”
“I just know, come two o’clock, you’ll be here, or in the shower.”
“I won’t.”
“You will, Mia. You love me.”
Now it’s my turn to laugh. “That’s where you’re wrong. This … ‘thing’ never had anything to do with love. I was attracted to you. I don’t feel anything else. I don’t love you. I love Dan.”
“Well,” says Jamie evenly. “Good for Dan.”
He’s looking behind me and I turn my head. Dan has just reached the edge of the pool. I don’t know how much he heard.
“The taxi’s here,” he says.