She risked a glance and saw Adrian looking at her. He looked ahead and swerved over, crossing into the other lane and then pulling onto the shoulder to stop. Crystal grinned and wanted to leap into the air. She surged ahead with fresh hope and then felt her legs jerk to her left and pull her with them. She tumbled into the dirt, rolling and skidding amid a cloud of dust.
When the world stopped spinning around her, she jerked her head around and looked back. Dirt caked her haunch and then was washed away as fresh blood seeped out of the hole in her hip. She stared, in shock, and wondered why it didn’t hurt.
“Crystal! Get up!”
Adrian’s voice jerked her attention back to him. She scrambled to get her front legs under her and rise up on them. Her injury didn’t hurt so she figured her hind legs would be okay. A startled yelp burst from her mouth, proving she was wrong. Her leg twisted and she felt the vibration of bone grating on bone. Fresh blood ran down her leg and she looked up to see the farmer aiming down his gun at her.
Three legs would have to do. She tried again and lurched forward, hopping on her left hind leg while she used her front legs to pull herself. In seconds, her shoulders were exhausted. The farmer’s shotgun roared again but the slug passed over her by inches. She hunched down and whimpered from the pain that dragging her broken leg caused.
She looked up and saw Adrian walking towards her. He was on the edge of the field and was looking past her at the farmer. She had twenty feet to go. Fifteen. Ten. She jerked as another bullet hit her, this time in the front shoulder. She fell over and lie there on the ground, gasping. She couldn’t catch her breath this time. She struggled to climb to her feet, kicking her legs but only moving dirt and aggravating her injuries.
A shadow fell over her and then she felt somebody picking her up. “Hang on, kid,” Adrian’s strained voice hissed. “I’ve got to get you out of here.”
Crystal whimpered. She couldn’t talk. She could barely breathe. Everything was hurting on her. Her shoulder, her hip, her chest. Everything.
Somehow Adrian climbed on his motorcycle and positioned Crystal on his lap. She tried to shift and make it easier, but he put his hand on her side to keep her still. He raced the throttle and shifted, jerking the bike and chirping the tire as it lurched forward. The engine chunked for a moment and then took up a smooth stride as the transmission and pistons agreed to get along without the clutch.
A few seconds later, Adrian shifted again. He still didn’t use the clutch but he managed to time the engine’s RPMs just right so it was a smooth shift. He kept this up and raced through an empty stop sign. He kept going, only slowing to turn once.
Crystal focused on trying to breathe. She was safe, that’s all that mattered. Adrian would help her. He would fix her up and take the burning agony away. He’d take her to Hank and then nothing would ever be wrong again. Nothing except the need to run like hell and get away from the crazy psychos who tried to kill her.
Clinging to that thought, Crystal let the vibration of the engine convince her it was okay to let the darkness take her.
Chapter 6
A dream of being eaten alive by ants forced Crystal awake. The dream was just that, a dream, but the itch in her shoulder only grew worse. She flopped and tried to lift herself up, only to be held down. She cried out but didn’t recognize the words that came out of her mouth. They weren’t words; they were whimpers and cries. She was still a wolf.
“Be still,” Gwen whispered in her ear and stroked her head with one hand. Gwen turned to her right and said, “She’s awake.”
She rolled her eye, searching for some clue about what was happening to her. All she saw was Guntar’s shoulder and the side of his face. He looked very serious. She felt him push against her and that led to the sharp pinch before she felt some strange pressure inside her. It tickled inside her chest and made her want to cough. The weight on her chest kept her from doing more than wheezing. She wanted to ask what was going on and why but the memories started coming back to her. Memories of running through town and being shot. Memories of learning how to shift and how she’d come to that knowledge.
Something tugged inside her, flooding her chest with heat. The heat faded after a moment. Her breathing became worse, even though she felt like some of the pressure in her chest was gone. The weight that filled it now was different. It wasn’t heavier, but it made her breathing sluggish, as though something was resisting her or pushing back.
“Roll her over,” Guntar snapped. “Let the blood drain out or she’ll drown.”
Drown? Crystal tried to rise up again but Gwen and Guntar held her down. Was that the resistance she felt? Before she could wonder any more, strong hands grabbed her legs and belly and rolled her over on her back. She tried to cry out but it came out as a weak whimper that included a wheezing and bubbling sound. She’d been shot in the shoulder and the bullet had punctured her lung.
She gasped for breath. She knew how to heal herself; they just had to let her be so she could. Instead, her shoulder and leg were rubbed against the ground and sent a deep throbbing ache all the way to her eyeballs.
“Crystal, you need to shift,” Adrian said from somewhere nearby. She couldn’t see him but she heard him over her own frantic pants. “It will heal you enough to survive now that Guntar has removed the bullet.”
“Listen to him,” Gwen urged. “He’s right. You’re hurt very badly and you’ve lost a lot of blood.”
“Do it,” Guntar demanded.
“I know you’re weak, but focus and put the wolf away.”
Crystal moved her head in an attempt to shake it. She wanted to tell Gwen that wouldn’t work for her. The wolf wasn’t something she controlled; it was her. She was the wolf. They’d become one being. The furry monster that she’d turned into when she was with Hank was also part of who she was now.
“Yes, do it,” Gwen insisted, mistaking her movement for something else. “Please, Crystal; you feel weak but this will help.”
Gwen was right about one thing: she did feel weak. She was breathing a little easier, but not much. She closed her eyes to focus on trying to make herself better. Barely a second passed before Gwen slapped her cheek lightly and interrupted her.
“Don’t go to sleep! If you sleep again you’ll die!”
Crystal blinked and managed a soft whimper. She glanced around, trying to spot Hank and Ember. Shouldn’t they be there too?
“Shift, damn it!” Ember snarled from nearby. Her voice sounded like a mix of pleading and angry frustration. It reminded Crystal of how she’d felt so often lately.
Wait, if Ember was there but she couldn’t see her, did that mean Hank was probably there too? Why wasn’t he holding her? Stroking her fur or kissing away her hurts. Of course that wouldn’t do any good, unless Hank had some magical healing powers she didn’t know about. Only Clover had those and hers were more than a little complicated. No, it was good that Hank wasn’t there. He’d be upset and so would she. And all of that would distract her from what she needed to do.
Crystal focused again and tried to make the pain go away. She held onto the idea for a count of four before her thoughts began to drift and her head dropped to the ground. She hadn’t realized she’d even picked it up. She gasped for each labored breath. The bright side was she thought it was a little easier to breathe.
Easy or not, another attempt like that and she’d pass out again. Whatever she had left, she had to use to shift back. Even if it killed her, she had to give it her all. Her tongue lolled onto the ground and she licked her jowls a couple of times to try to clean the dirt off before she dug into her tired memories for what she’d done when she’d shifted to a wolf in the first place.
She focused on an image of herself and tried to will the change to come. Several seconds passed before she blinked and realized she was doing it wrong. It wasn’t want; it was need. And the need was at her demand. If she wanted to pick up a glass of water, she did. If she needed to squat and pee, she did. And if she needed to shift
—
Crystal’s teeth clamped together and her body ripped itself apart for the second time. Red and white splashes filled her vision as her bones and flesh reshaped around her. Her organs shifted, rearranging themselves to fit her different form, and in the process the body knew to restore much of the damage that had been done. Her fur retracted, pulling back into her skin even as the hair on her body she’d had before grew out.
After several agonizing seconds, the spots in her eyes faded and she stared up into the night sky. She felt different. Colder, among other things. She tried to pick her head up but the fading memory of the pain robbed her of both the will and the strength to do it. She laid still and licked her dry lips.
“Hey, it’s night,” she realized and whispered before her head rolled to the side and she knew no more.
Chapter 7
“I wish we knew what happened to her,” Gwen said in a hushed voice that still carried through the open windows of the trailer.
“She shifted and got shot,” Guntar said. “Farmers have been killing wolves as long as they’ve been farming. It’s like dogs hunting cats.”
“I know that,” she replied. “There’s got to be more to it, though. Her shoulder didn’t heal when she shifted. Not all the way.”
Crystal turned her head and looked at her shoulder. It was covered by Hank’s blanket and she didn’t feel like moving yet. Or at all, for that matter. She was exhausted, but not so tired she didn’t flick her eyes to the clock on the stand beside his bed. Ten thirty-two. In the morning. How much time had she lost?
Gwen and Guntar kept talking, but their voices faded until she couldn’t hear them. The trailer shifted, drawing her eyes to the door that led out of Hank’s bedroom. It stayed shut.
“Hank, stop pacing!” Ember hissed. Her voice was muffled by the thin trailer walls but there was no mistaking the edge in it.
“I’m just going to check on her,” Hank mumbled.
“You just checked! Let her rest. She’s had a rough couple of days.”
Couple of days? How long had she been sleeping? Crystal tried to sit up but she only managed to push the blanket down to her waist before she fell back into bed and let out a breathy groan.
“Did you hear that?” Hank hissed.
“Stay here,” Ember barked.
“Like hell! She’s my—”
“That’s why you need to stay out here. Just give me a minute. Girl stuff.”
“Girl stuff? That’s bullshit!”
Silence followed for several seconds while Crystal watched the door. Finally it opened and Ember, not Hank, slipped through. She shut the door behind her and met Crystal’s eyes. Ember smiled, erasing the tension that lined her face and made her look stiff and angry.
“Morning, sleepyhead.”
Crystal’s lips twitched. She opened her mouth but Ember shook her head. The redhead walked over and sat down on the edge of the bed.
“Looking good,” Ember said.
Crystal blushed and reached for the blanket to pull it up to cover her breasts. Ember’s hand went to her arm and stopped her. All it took was a feather touch.
“You had us worried,” Ember said. “I had to sit on Hank to keep him from tearing that farmer apart. Why didn’t you come to us when you shifted? Hank said you wanted to go home and have some time to yourself. I get that, but two days without telling us anything? Crys, we’re a pack now. That means family. If you had any doubts, you shouldn’t now. You’re one of us.”
Two days? Crystal frowned and forced herself to whisper, “How long?”
“Adrian found you a couple of days ago.”
Crystal picked her head up, her surprise giving her strength. “What day is it?”
“Friday. He found you Wednesday. You left us Monday night,” Ember said, answering Crystal’s unasked questions.
“Holy cow,” Crystal breathed.
“So what happened?” Ember asked. “And are you hungry?”
The thought of food made her shiver. She nodded. “Oh my God, yes!”
Ember smiled and stood up. She went to the door and opened it up. “Hank, bring her some soup.”
“Soup?” he asked.
“Go!” Ember barked.
Crystal smiled when she heard the door to the trailer open and shut. Hank was so wonderful to her. She knew he had to be dying inside but he was doing what was best for her. She loved him so much.
Ember returned to the bed and crawled onto it. She slipped up next to Crystal and hugged her, burying her face in the crook of Crystal’s neck. The redhead’s behavior reminded her of a dog greeting her owner when they got home. She even felt wetness on her skin. Crystal found the strength to move one arm and place it on Ember’s back. She blinked tears from her own eyes that ran down and soaked into Hank’s pillow.
Ember straightened and moved to sit next to her again. She sniffed and wiped her eyes before saying, “You tell anyone and I’ll bite your face off.”
Crystal smiled. “Same here.”
“Good,” Ember said. “So tell me what happened, already. How did you figure out how to shift?”
Crystal opened her mouth before she thought back to the confusing events of the last few days. She remembered shifting and then had to remember why she’d needed to: a vision of red and pink mist splattering over her as Chad’s father shot him. She gasped.
“What is it?”
“Chad! He’s—”
“They’ve got him hidden away,” Ember said. “We haven’t been able to find him all week.”
“He’s dead.”
Ember’s eyes widened. “Dead? Did you do it?”
Crystal shook her head. “No. When I left, I—”
Ember held up a hand. “Wait. Everyone needs to hear this,” she said.
Crystal bit her lip and nodded.
“Is there anything special, though? Anything private? Anything you don’t want the others to know?”
Crystal frowned. “What? No. Why?”
Ember shrugged. “I wanted to give you the chance. Once I turn you loose to Hank, there’s no telling when we can have a private moment again.”
Crystal smiled. “Thank you, that’s sweet.”
Ember scowled. “I don’t do sweet, I—”
“Shut up, yes you are. You just want people to think you’re a bitch.”
Ember sniffed and looked away. After a few moments she asked, “So, what was it like?”
“What?”
“Shifting. Becoming the wolf.”
“I am the wolf.”
Ember tilted her head. “No, I meant—”
“I know what you meant,” Crystal said. She reached out and placed her hand on Ember’s. “I’m not upset or confused. I am tired, but I’ve been sleeping for days now.”
“Food will help, you’re starving.”
Crystal nodded. She felt empty. Not just her stomach—her entire body. “At Clover’s, when I joined with the wolf, we became one person, not two.”
Ember’s eyes narrowed. “I don’t understand.”
“You fought the wolf and live together, right?” She waited for Ember to nod before continuing. “You tell it when it can come out and when you need to put it back in its cage. It’s not like that for me.”
Instead of arguing, the redhead asked, “So what’s it like?”
“It is me. All of me. The white fur when we ran, shifting fully to a wolf, or looking like this.”
“You’re beautiful in all three.”
“Thank you.” Crystal smiled and then added, “Lesbo.”
Ember rolled her eyes. “Knock it off. I think you’re beautiful. It doesn’t mean I want to sleep with you.”
“You don’t?”
“Not like that,” Ember said.
“What?”
“I’d cuddle with you anytime,” Ember said with a shrug. “Nothing sexual about it, though.”
“Cuddle? Oh. Um, okay.”
“It’s not as weird as you think,” Ember said with a chuckle. “
It’s something we do sometimes, especially when somebody’s hurt.”
Crystal didn’t understand, but she smiled like she did and said, “Okay, maybe sometime then.”
The door to the trailer opened, sparing her any more awkwardness. It was several seconds before it shut again. The door to the bedroom opened and Hank stood with a bowl and a spoon in one hand. Guntar, Gwen, and Adrian were behind him.
“Can we come in?” Hank asked.
Ember smiled and nodded. She stood and carefully climbed over Crystal before sitting next to her on the far side of the bed. She was pinned between Crystal and the wall but didn’t show any concerns about the tight space. Crystal remembered how Ember had done something very similar when she was hurting at Clover’s hut in the swamp. She smiled and realized this was an example of the cuddling the red-haired woman had been talking about.
Hank sat on the bed next to her and held the bowl in one hand while lifting a spoon full of the soup out of it.
“Hank! Help her sit up first,” Ember chided him.
“Oh, good idea,” he mumbled. His cheeks flushed under his stubble as he turned and set the bowl on the table. He turned back and between the three of them, Crystal managed to end up in a sitting position with her back against the headboard of the overloaded bed. He picked the bowl up and tried to feed her again.
“I can manage,” she said with a smile. Hank’s face flushed again so she added, “But thank you. I really appreciate it.”
He grunted and nodded before handing her the bowl and spoon. She took it and raised the bowl and the first spoonful of the steaming soup to her lips. She winced at the pulling in her shoulder and lowered the bowl to her lap before switching the spoon to her left hand. Her right shoulder was still aching where she’d been shot.
She tried the soup again and smelled beef and chicken in it, as well as a collection of vegetables. It was hot. Hot enough to sting her tongue and lips, but it also ignited a fire in her belly that demanded more. She slurped spoon after spoon, even spilling some down her chin and onto her chest before the bowl was empty. She looked up and around, noticing all five of them staring at her with grins on their faces. “Good,” she mumbled, embarrassed by the spectacle she’d made.
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