Gods & Monsters

by Jani Kay

  My chest tightened. “There’s no time, Ryder. We have to do it soon. We have to make the run tonight if we can. Tomorrow night may be too late. Pedro may decide to take her with him.” I ran my fingers through my hair. “Fuck, we may be too late already . . .” Overcome with panic, my breathing became labored and shallow. I closed my eyes for a moment and took a few deep breaths to calm myself.

  “I still think you’ve lost your fucking mind.” Ryder gripped the back of the chair he was standing behind until his knuckles turned white.

  “That may be true; I’m not going to argue about that. Esmé is bringing Alessandra over after the dinner. I’ll talk to her and make her the offer. Then we need to act before it’s too late.”

  Ryder shrugged. He looked tired. “All I can say is that I pray I never get as cunt-struck as you. That would be the end of me. I’m going to take a nap while we wait.”

  I watched him pat Razor and Hammer on the back and slide his hands into his jeans pockets as he walked away. Everything hinged on Ryder seeing it my way. My nerves gnawed my guts. I felt sick.

  “Listen, brothers, get some shut-eye. If we leave after midnight, it’s going to be tough on our bodies. Get some rest.”

  Razor loved sleeping. It wasn’t hard to convince him to have a late afternoon nap. Hammer on the other hand was a night owl and hardly ever napped, but he nodded, understanding the gravity of it all. I watched them go off to their shared motel room.

  Was Ryder right? Was I screwing with death to get the woman I wanted? What he’d said about the club and risking our lives was true. Yet, in spite of everything, I couldn’t help myself. There was no way I was leaving this place without her.

  No fucking way.

  Chapter 17 — Cobra

  I’d hardly slept at all, tossing and turning on the squeaky bed, sweat dripping from my body in spite of having the fan on at full force and causing a mini hurricane in my room.

  Every half an hour I’d crank an eye open to peek at my watch. The evening was crawling. It felt as if hours had passed, yet each time I checked my watch it was only five or ten minutes later. I wouldn’t feel better until Esmé brought Alessandra to the motel.

  We were lucky to have Esmérelda as a go-between. She’d come to talk to me earlier and we’d had a long chat about her best friend, the Don and the safest way to help Alessandra. I would’ve preferred to speak to Alessandra myself, but I understood the risks and wanted to cut down both girls’ exposure to danger.

  Everything that had happened mulled through my mind. And every time I came back to the same conclusion. For me, there was no other option.

  Two hours later, with my body aching from rolling around on an uncomfortably hard mattress, I got up in search of coffee. Ideally something stronger would be better, but I had to keep my mind clear.

  I’d been planning the escape route in my head, factoring in variables that could fuck us in the ass.

  I switched the kettle on and found a dirty mug in the sink of the tiny kitchenette and rinsed it with hot water. Two teaspoons of instant coffee and a heaped spoon full of sugar should do the trick and jolt my brain out of its stupor. I lit a cigarette as I waited for the kettle to boil, pulling my eyes into tight slits as I inhaled my poison. The instant hit of nicotine to my lungs helped me feel better already.

  Half a cup of caffeine later, and I was starting to feel semi-human. The cheap brand of instant coffee tasted like crap, but I drank it all down anyway and went back for a second cup, this time with extra sugar. I needed the kick.

  My mind was spinning. This was serious shit. If I fucked up, we’d all be dead by morning. The stakes were the highest I’d ever encountered, yet with the help of caffeine and all the thinking I’d done, came clarity.

  It hit me like a Mack truck.

  I fucking loved Alessandra.

  Loved her.

  I wasn’t sure exactly when that had happened, but she’d crept so deep under my skin that to lose her would be to lose myself.

  I’d do anything to keep her safe. To stop her from marrying the Don.

  Anything.

  This was way fucked up. I was supposed to be tough and hard and unfeeling, yet I’d let a girl own my fucking heart. No wonder Ryder thought I had a touch of madness come over me. After all, it ran in my genes. If it could turn Daemon onto a mean motherfucker, what could it do to me?

  “Hey.” Ryder’s voice was croaky and he looked like shit, with his hair a fucking mess and his eyes bloodshot. He reached out and dragged the mug of coffee that was in front of me over the counter toward him and took a long drink.

  He pulled a face when he tasted the plastic coffee, but it didn’t stop him from taking another sip. Guess he didn’t get any sleep either.

  “Jesus, did you just tip the fucking sugar bowl into the cup?” he said, lifting an eyebrow. “This shit is going to give me a fucking sugar rush all night long.” He stared into the cup, and then looked back up at me. “But I need something stronger. Tonight we all fucking die.”

  I watched Ryder take another sip, his left eye twitching as he stared at me over the brim of the mug.

  I sucked in a breath. “Does that mean—”

  “Yes, motherfucker. I’ll help you. Not because I owe you my fucking life. No, nothing that deep. But because I’ve never seen you like this. I have a feeling that if I don’t help you with your bitch, you’ll be dead anyway—from the inside. I can’t have that. I need my pres and brother to stay the fuck alive.”

  I reached out and grabbed his arm. “Thank you. I know what I’m asking. If anyone expected me to do what I’m demanding from you and the brothers, I'd probably tell them to go get fucked. Yet here we are.”

  It was nearly ten o’clock when Razor strolled into the kitchen, wiping the sleep from his eyes. “Hey, assholes,” he greeted as he scratched his balls through his boxer shorts. “Great night for causing shit, huh? When is the party starting?” He yawned as he stretched his arms out, the muscles of his biceps flexing. Razor had never been in better shape and that counted in our favor.

  How hard could it be to outsmart a few old men? They probably were all drinking and would have hangovers in the morning. And the Don? After he left Antonio’s place with a full stomach and even fuller balls, he’d probably go fuck some village virgin all night long, draining him of all his strength. As long as that virgin wasn’t Alessandra, it wasn’t my problem. But I had to move fast, before Ryder changed his mind or something else happened that could ruin our plans.

  “Looks like you’re ready to kick ass tonight,” I said, grinning at my younger brother. He’d have my back. Yeah, sometimes he was a loose cannon, but in his heart he was loyal to his club and his family. I could always count on that.

  Razor cracked his knuckles, grinning back at me. “So far this ride has been fucking boring. We need some action, man. I can’t wait to fuck shit up.”

  I had to chuckle in spite of how grim the situation was. Razor loved a good fight. He breathed for this kind of thing. He glanced over at Ryder, who had taken permanent possession of my coffee.

  “You in, Ryder? You’d be mad not to want to take out a few of these corrupt motherfuckers. Make the world a better place and all.”

  Ryder shrugged. “What do you care about the state the world is in? I'm thinking you just wanna kick some ass with those blades of yours. Been a long time since you made a man bleed,” he said without lifting his head.

  “Way too fucking long,” Razor said. “I’m rusting, dude.”

  Ryder snorted, then looked up at Razor with his one eyebrow lifted. “Ever thought it could be a good day for dying, little brother? We are on Mexican turf. They outnumber us at least ten to one—if not more.”

  My phone buzzed. It was a message from Esmérelda. She was on her way to pick Alessandra up.

  Ryder slid the mug across the table toward Razor. “Make your brothers a round of coffee. Extra strong. Extra sweet. I need the caffeine kick.”

  Razor took the mug and moved to where
the kettle was on the counter. He filled it with water and turned it on. “Only pussies worry about biting the dust. We all going to become worm food sooner or later. When my time comes, I’m happy to go. But till then, I ain’t living in fear of dying.”

  “Wise words for a kid this late at night. What happened? You all pissed your beds?” Hammer rubbed his bare stomach as he entered the kitchen, chuckling at his own joke.

  “Kid?” Razor smirked. He hated anyone calling him that. “Guess you don’t want coffee then?”

  “Don't be an asshole. Of course I want coffee. And I was paying you a fucking compliment.” Hammer pulled out a chair and sat at the table. His hair stood upright on one side only, a sign that he’d had a solid sleep. Lucky bastard. “So what’s happening? Are we doing this tonight?”

  I nodded, and Razor placed a full mug of coffee in front of me. “Yeah, shit is going down. I’ll call Daemon and tell him what’s happening so he will be ready on the other side. Have a shower and get ready. It’s going to be a long fucking night.”

  “When are we leaving?”

  “As soon as Alessandra gets here. Esmé has spoken to her and she wants to go with us.” I couldn’t help the smile that spread across my face. “Don't wanna waste time, in case somebody catches on and rats us out to the fucking Don.” I sucked in a breath. “Not that I’m afraid of him and his army; I’ll kill every one of those motherfuckers myself.” I balled both my fists and hit the table to make my point. Some coffee spilled from the mug. “But as Ryder said, we gotta be careful ’cause things can turn ugly. And I happen to like my life right now, so I have no intentions of a premature funeral.”

  Hammer lifted his mug of steaming coffee to his lips and toasted me with it. “Amen, brother. To growing fucking old together.”

  “Yeah,” Ryder said, his left eye still twitching. “You better be praying your god is listening tonight, Hammer . . . and that he’s stronger than theirs. I sense more trouble than what we’re aware of. Something’s gonna go bad, and I hope it doesn’t mean we are digging our own fucking graves.”

  I frowned as I ground my teeth together. Adrenaline spiked through my body together with a good dose of fear. Ryder had an uncanny sense of foreboding, which to date had never been wrong. We’d never been through anything with the stakes as high as this, and the look on his face and that fucking twitching eye of his sent shivers up my spine.

  This was fucked up shit.

  My decision would affect the whole club. Our business in Mexico would grind to a halt and fuck with our reliable source of income.

  Malone. He’d be mad at me for placing what I wanted above the club’s interests. Maybe he’d disown me for letting him down.

  Was I leading my brothers—and Alessandra—straight to their deaths?

  We’d find out soon enough.

  The clock was ticking.

  Tick tock. Tick tock.

  Chapter 18 — Alessandra

  My phone rang beside my head where I laid on my bed. I'd kept it close for when Esmé called, just like she told me to. She’d left after we’d helped Mama with the cooking and gone to Cobra later in the afternoon to find out his plans, and then called me. She’d also told him that I was getting ready to leave with him.

  Everything was set to go.

  “Has the old fart left?” she asked as I answered the phone.

  “Yes. I can’t believe Papa forced me to stay home. It was the worst few hours in my life. He . . . he tried to kiss me when my parents weren’t looking. He kept asking them to fetch something so they’d leave the room and then he’d try to . . . oh God, his hands all over me . . . It was horrible. Horrible.” I said, squeezing my eyes shut in the hope to obliterate the memory. If that was how I felt after just one evening in his presence, then I didn’t know how I’d manage a lifetime being married to him. It was not possible.

  “Listen, I’m on my way to pick you up. I’ve borrowed Christina’s boyfriend’s car. Well, technically, I stole it. They’re in her bedroom screwing. But we’ll be back before he knows I took it.”

  “God, Esmé, what if you have an accident?”

  “You worry too much. You should have a boy teach you how to drive too.” I chuckled in spite of the dire situation I was in. Esmé had exchanged sex for driving lessons with a previous boyfriend. Little did I know then how grateful I’d be for that.

  “Stop outside the gate so the noise doesn’t wake Mama. Papa will be sleeping like a dead man after the amount of tequila he consumed tonight.”

  Fifteen minutes later, Esmé crept into my bedroom. I’d left the front door unlocked for her. My parents had gone to bed, and my father’s snoring echoed all the way from down the hallway. He and Don Pedro had been drinking all night. Usually I hated when Papa did that, but tonight I was grateful because it meant he’d fallen into a stupor, which led to a deep sleep.

  Esmé planted herself on my bed. She rested her hands in her lap as she looked around my bedroom, as if she was taking it in for the last time.

  “I have such happy memories of this room. I’m going to miss you, my friend.”

  I sat beside her, dangling my legs off the side of the bed. “You can always come and see Mama. She’d like that. She’ll be lonely—”

  “I will. She is family to me. You know we’ll talk about you, right?”

  “You better be talking about me. If you don’t it means you’ve forgotten me,” I said, sadness creeping into my heart.

  Silence fell between us. We were saying goodbye to our childhood with our actions tonight.

  “This is it. There is no turning back. Once you leave with Cobra, you’re screwed. You can never come back. Do you understand?”

  It took a few seconds for it all to sink in. Cobra really wants me. He’s willing to fight for me. What more could I ever want? At last, the man I dreamed of would make me his and we’d live a happy life together. Of that I was certain in a way I couldn’t explain. I'd known from that first moment, as a child, that there was something special between us, and it had only grown stronger over the years. There was nothing I wouldn’t do to be with him.

  Nothing.

  Before I could reply, Esmé took hold of my hand and held it in hers. “I can’t imagine my life without you, but if this is what you want—” She blinked back tears as I fought for my own self-control. My throat burned so much I couldn’t speak.

  Dark nearly-black eyes bored into mine. Her hands trembled and felt cold as ice. “I hope you realize how dangerous this is. That if the Don finds you before you’ve crossed the border, he’ll kill all of you.” Her voice faltered. “He doesn’t like to be crossed, and he’s killed families for lesser crimes.” She squeezed my hand so hard that it hurt.

  “Oh God, Esmé, what if the Don comes after my parents?” I rubbed my chest to stop the pain. It wasn’t a thought I wanted to entertain, yet it was a stark reality I had to face. I hated the idea that he could punish me by hurting or killing them.

  “There is still time to back out, honey. If you want to stay, I’ll go back to Cobra and tell him you aren’t risking your . . . or your parent’s lives to be with him.”

  “No!” I hissed without hesitation. “You don’t understand. I’ve told you before—if I stay and marry the Don, you may as well kill me now. I have no other option.” I took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. “I want to be Cobra’s woman more than anything. If that means we risk our lives to have that chance, then that’s the way it has to be. Our paths were already fated the day Cobra walked into my life. Even though I had no idea, it started then.”

  “What started?” Esmé said, confusion on her face.

  “My love for him. I’ve loved Cobra since that first day. I know you think it’s rubbish, but I can only tell you how I feel. He’s what I've always wanted.”

  Her eyes were wide and round. “You sound so certain of this. Are you sure you are ready for it?”

  “I've never been more ready for anything. I can’t wait for my new life.”

 
Esmé laughed softly. “I wish you could have seen him this afternoon. He was pacing the room like a caged tiger waiting to be set free to pounce on his enemies.” She shuddered. “I only hope he fully understands what will happen to all of you if the Don catches you.”

  “Oh Esmé, this whole thing is so damn complicated. I’m not only risking my own life, but I’m also placing everyone else’s in danger. Even yours, my friend. I’d never forgive myself if anyone got killed. And if Cobra were to die—” I shivered, icy cold fingers gripping my heart as my stomach churned. “As for myself—it can’t be worse than having to spend the rest of my life with the Don. Can it?”

  “Oh, little bird, you have no idea about how cruel men can be, do you? If you get caught, horrible things will happen to you.”

  I looked up at her. “If your father beating your mother in front of your eyes isn’t bad enough, I don’t know what is.”

  “She lives—your mother gets to see another day. Yes, she’s full of bruises, but she’s alive. I'm afraid you and your biker friends won't be so lucky.” She rubbed up my arm, chewing her lip before continuing. “And Cobra? The Don will cut off his prick and make you eat it. I've heard he did that to one of his sluts that cheated on him. Then he’ll let you watch as Cobra slowly bleeds to death.”

  My hand flew to cover my mouth. That was vile. My stomach turned and I felt sick at the thought. I was willing to die getting away, but could I expect Cobra to risk his life for me? And his friends? It was beyond crazy.

  Yet I knew I was already dead if he didn’t take me with him.

  I’d done everything Esmé had told me to. I’d forced food into my belly even when I wanted to be sick, because she’d said I’d need my strength. I’d had a bath, and was now dressed in jeans and boots and a dark T-shirt. I’d shoved the money Mama had given me into my pocket and packed a few special belongings into my backpack—small things to remind me mostly of my mother. It was all I was allowed to take with me to mark my first years of life.