by Emma Dean
Shane looked down at her and the expression in his eyes wasn’t pity, but understanding. “I’m sorry. Losing my parents was hard, but I was so young. I barely remember them.”
Bonnie shrugged and stepped forward in the line. “I was pretty self-sufficient, but I had to take care of a lot I wasn’t prepared for. I couldn’t imagine losing them younger. What happened, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“They were on the run from what I could gather. I don’t know why, but they came to Blue Mountain Pack and asked them to watch me. They left and never came back. The pack went looking for them and they found their bodies ravaged in the forest. So some shifter group was after my parents. I’ll always be grateful to them for getting me somewhere safe.”
Bonnie didn’t know what to say to that. His world was so brutal and unforgiving. She took another step forward and blinked back the tears she could feel gathering. “How?” she finally asked. “How are you so calm about that? You’re so…normal and nice.”
Shane squeezed her shoulder. “I have to be or I’d lose my mind. It’s why I have these compulsions and the need for control. It’s the one side effect I couldn’t avoid. My parents did the best thing for me and I’ll never forget it. I’ve never looked into why they were killed. I didn’t think it was something I would handle well.”
Bonnie wrapped her arm around his middle and gave him a little hug. “You’re a much stronger person than I am,” she told him.
Shane kissed her forehead which made her squeal inside at how adorable he could be. Then he ordered an entire dozen donuts as well as some coffees. The place was an utter madhouse even in the middle of a weekday.
Suddenly the chatter felt loud and too much. Bonnie had that stirring in her chest, the one that usually pushed her to leave the city just to get away from all the people and noise and the constant motion.
It was hard to deal with sometimes and why she’d enjoyed being out in La Grande so much, but she still wasn’t sure what she wanted. Could she move out there with Amelia without having to commit to the mate bond? Maybe they could do a long distance partnership.
“So if I did partner with Amelia on the business and decided to move to La Grande instead of remotely, would I have to also accept the mate bond, or could that happen over time?” Bonnie asked.
Shane glanced at her and then turned away. He grabbed the coffees and handed one to her and then took the pink box. There was no response to her question as he led her outside to a massive black truck she recognized. Would he even answer her?
“No, we don’t have to accept the mate bond right away,” he finally said, tucking the box under his chin so he could open the passenger door for her.
Bonnie blushed and stepped up into the cab. Shane was such a weird mix of rough edges and chivalry.
He set the pink box of donuts in her lap and then closed the door gently. Shane ran around the truck to the driver’s side and then hopped in. He started the truck up and adjusted the dials so warm air filled the cab.
“As long as there isn’t much distance between us we don’t have to accept the bond until you want to. But I do have to warn you, the longer we are near each other, the more…physical we are together, the stronger the bond is going to get. It would be painful to reject it, but it won’t kill either of us.” Shane put the truck in gear and then merged into traffic while she thought about what he’d said.
It sounded very all or nothing, but she could date him and see how it went. Though if the way she felt now was any indication, she would be falling for him hard and fast the more time they spent together.
This was all so much to take in and digest. It wasn’t anything like a normal human relationship, although that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Every human relationship she’d had up to this point had been a complete and total shit-show.
Shane got on the freeway going east and then asked her for a maple bacon donut. Bonnie handed it over and then took one for herself. She did like that he let her think in peace. Silence didn’t seem to bother him.
Because Bonnie needed some time to mull things over as they drove to wherever.
What exactly was the risk to moving out to La Grande? The only real issue was losing money on the publishing company after she’d given up the position she currently had at Ravens. Bonnie had originally planned to stick it out a few more years and see if she could snag that Editor-in-Chief position.
But after that she had nothing figured out. Before her parents had died she had expected to go back to the ranch at some point and take that over, but now that wasn’t an option and no matter how sad she was about giving up the ranch, she knew it had been the right choice.
The place would have drained her finances and she wouldn’t have been able to profit on her own.
Though starting a publishing company was a huge risk too. They probably wouldn’t profit for years because they’d have to study the market, find authors, and get those books out for sale. It would be hard work, and probably stressful.
They would also be doing something they loved.
Bonnie pulled out her phone as she took a bite of the donut. She sent a text to Amelia. ‘I’m in.’ She had more money than she could ever spend. Might as well put it to good use.
With that settled she smiled and reached for her coffee. This way she could still be close to her best friend, start the business they’d always talked about, and give this thing with Shane a chance before accepting something as insanely permanent as a mate bond.
“What are you over there smiling about?” Shane asked, reaching for another donut.
Bonnie shook her head. “Oh nothing. Where are you taking me?”
He gave her a look like he didn’t believe her, but didn’t push her for more details. “We’re going to Multnomah Falls.”
Bonnie squealed and punched him in the arm. She couldn’t contain her excitement. “Yes! We’re going hiking?”
Shane chuckled. “Yes, though I’ve never heard anyone get so excited about it before.”
It was hard to keep from grinning. This day was looking better and better. Bonnie couldn’t wait to spend a little over two miles getting to know Shane while enjoying the workout. The falls were gorgeous and it was cold enough there wouldn’t be very many hikers other than them.
Life was starting to make sense again and Bonnie felt like she finally had a plan.
Chapter Ten
Shane
He glanced over at Bonnie for the thousandth time. She was staring out the window at the scenery as they left the city. It was a little less than thirty minutes to the parking lot where they could start their hike and she no longer smelled like fear and anxiety.
That was the highlight of his day so far. She didn’t seem afraid anymore – of the future, or the mate bond, or even him. That last one out of all of them had been the one that worried him the most.
Though she hadn’t been afraid of him when he’d shifted in front of her.
Shane took a sip of his coffee and kept his eyes on the road. She was distracting as hell and all he wanted to do was take her back to the townhouse and show her how he felt by tearing off her clothes and tasting every inch of her.
After he’d received that threatening phone call – Shane had lost his goddamn mind. He’d called Kai and then went straight to Bonnie’s neighborhood. He’d even followed her and Amelia the day before when they went shopping while Kai looked into the threat.
He hadn’t been able to find anything, so one of them had kept watch since the call. Amelia couldn’t shift yet so she didn’t have the full extent of her shifter strength and her healing was a bit slower than theirs. She couldn’t protect Bonnie as well as he could and his damn wolf wouldn’t leave him alone about it either.
His wolf was only okay with Kai as an alternative. Kai really was the strongest wolf and Alpha on the West Coast. Shane had never seen a wolf quite as big as him.
They were having difficulty finding the source of the unknown call and there were still so many peop
le who wanted the Blue Mountain Pack dead for the shit the previous Alphas did. It would be almost impossible to find one person.
Shane had to convince Bonnie to go back to the homestead. He would have the rest of the pack to help guard her until they could track the threat down and eradicate it.
How had they even found out he had a mate in the first place? Frank knew he had a mate, but the old bear had stuck his neck out for him so many times – he would never betray Shane.
For someone who he’d originally assumed would never stop talking, Bonnie could be quiet for long periods of time.
“Do you like hiking to the falls?” Shane asked, turning off the freeway. He reached for a third donut. They were worth all the hype for once and each one was good for different reasons. He bit the head off the voodoo doll and glanced at her again.
God she was gorgeous. The sun made her black-brown hair look almost red and it set off her blue eyes when she turned to smile at him. “It’s too much of a tourist attraction normally,” she told him. “But I’ve done it a few times and it’s always so pretty.”
“Where else do you hike?” he asked as they parked.
“I’ve done every trail in the Portland area and a few others that are a bit farther out,” she admitted, finishing her coffee.
Her scent filled the cab of his truck and the heater only made it more potent. Shane had to shake his head to clear it. She was everywhere and he could barely think with how distracting she was. Bonnie was happy and it was the sweetest thing he’d ever smelled.
She jumped out of the cab and tucked her hands in her coat pockets. Shane grabbed his backpack with some protein bars, water bottles, and a first aid kit. It wasn’t a long hike, but he liked to be prepared. “Are you ready to go?” he asked.
Bonnie nodded and then smiled at him. He blinked; stunned once more by her beauty and the sheer energy from her he could feel like a vibration in the air.
Shane had been so relieved when Bonnie had texted him the day before. Amelia had promised she would talk to her about it, but Shane hadn’t been convinced that would work. He wouldn’t question her again.
Now he had this chance and he wasn’t going to fuck it up.
As they started up the trail he looked over at her. “So, would you mind telling me why you know so much about OCD?” he asked. Shane was more than a little intrigued.
Bonnie blushed and shrugged her shoulders, keeping her eyes on the ground as she chose each step carefully but deliberately. Her legs were strong and she breathed slow and deep to pace herself. She was fit and in shape and could probably hold her own against a human male, but Shane wasn’t worried about humans.
“It was a long time ago,” she said. He could smell her become embarrassed and unsure again.
Shane growled at the smell, his wolf hating it just as much as he did. “Look, this is a judgement free zone. Don’t assume I’m ever going to make fun of you. Challenge you? Sure, but I don’t tease. That’s not my thing.”
Bonnie stopped and looked up at him. Shane liked how close she was and how she had to crane her neck to look at him. He took another step closer to her so he could feel her coat brush against his chest. Her breath caught and he could hear her heart racing.
“If you don’t want to tell me, just say so,” he snapped. Shane liked how she refused to look down and submit to him even though he knew his eyes were glowing silver with how close his wolf was to the surface.
Bonnie wasn’t afraid of his wolf.
“Fine,” she spat. “I will, but only if you start walking again. At this rate we won’t make it before sunset.”
Shane grinned and followed her as she stomped up the trail. Her ass looked so fucking good in those jeans his hands itched to grab it, but he wanted to take his time and get her to open up to him emotionally.
Before she found out about all the paranormal shit was when she’d wanted him the most, mind and body. Now…she still wanted his body. Shane had that going for him at least. And there was something she didn’t want to tell him yet, but she would.
“So?” he asked, enjoying the view.
Bonnie huffed. “When I was about sixteen I had an eating disorder that stemmed from body dysmorphic disorder. First I ended up in the hospital from malnutrition, and then I was admitted to the psych ward so they could monitor me.” She glanced back at him and slowed down so he was forced to catch up.
Shane didn’t say anything or comment on her body. He knew better than most that it wasn’t about what he saw, it was about what she did. But she looked fucking amazing to him.
“It took me about a year of therapy and living in the psych ward before I could deal with the thoughts and function like a normal person. I work out, that’s my solution. I have to meet a certain amount of calories a day per the doctor. Preferably healthy food, but I haven’t had issues in almost ten years…until recently.”
Shane instantly didn’t like the sound of that. His wolf rumbled deep in his chest and he took a step closer to Bonnie, but still he kept his mouth shut. She didn’t need him fussing over her. “A year is a long time,” was all he said on the matter.
“Yeah,” she shrugged. “I graduated early though because I did my GED online. Then I got a really good SAT score and was accepted to the University of Portland. It kind of worked out in the long run.”
Shane took a bottle of water out of the backpack and handed it to Bonnie. The thick forest and greenery always soothed his soul. He missed the homestead already. His house was in the middle of the forest – nothing but trees for scenery.
“So you met a lot of people with different mental health issues?” he asked, enjoying the warmth from her proximity.
“I did. Everything from OCD to schizophrenia and anything else you could think of. It was enlightening, and honestly made me realize I could have had it much worse.”
Their boots crunched through the snow while they walked in silence. Bonnie took a sip from the water and then handed it back to him. Shane took a drink as well and then stopped to put it back.
Bonnie’s grin made him nervous. “What?” he asked.
“You should turn into a wolf.”
The suggestion called to him and Shane desperately wanted to, but Multnomah Falls and the trails leading to it were too populated for his liking. They didn’t need reports of wild wolves on the trails reaching the rangers in a place they didn’t own or control. He closed the distance between them and wrapped his hands around her waist.
“Are you trying to tell me to stop talking?”
She grinned up at him. “I really don’t think talking is what your mouth is the best at.”
Her snark made him chuckle and he reached out to trace her bottom lip with his thumb. It made all his senses focus on the softness of her lips, how full they were, and the memory of what they’d tasted like.
Kissing her was like nothing he’d ever experienced before. Shane had kissed and fucked plenty of girls before, but none of them were Bonnie. None of them could hold a candle to her.
The sound of her heart beating faster made him smile and he licked his lips. He could smell her desire mixed with the forest and the icy snow. It was fucking delicious.
But Bonnie was the one to grab his face and yank him down. She kissed him like she might never get the chance to do it again – like she was starved for his taste. Shane rumbled his pleasure and opened his mouth for her so his tongue could play with hers.
Fuck, she tasted like sugar and strawberries.
Shane lifted her up, desperate to get closer to her. She wrapped her legs around his waist and he turned them both around, pressing her up against a tree as he nibbled on her bottom lip. “If it wasn’t so cold I’d take you here,” he rumbled.
Shit, if she didn’t stop pulling on his hair like that he might just take her anyways.
“Bonnie,” he murmured against her lips. “If you don’t stop it’ll be your fault we don’t make it to the bridge before sunset.”
She groaned against his mouth an
d wiggled against his cock. He was so hard it pressed uncomfortably against his pants and her rubbing on it was more than a little distracting. Shane slid his hand up and under her coat and sweater until he could feel bare skin.
“Do you want me to take you to the pack’s townhouse?” he asked, grinding against her.
Her gasp didn’t help matters either. Bonnie kissed him again, but slower this time. Her arousal was heady and Shane was ready to lose his mind if she didn’t give him some direction.
“Tell me what you want,” he demanded.
Bonnie licked along the seam of his lips and then released him, sliding her entire body along his until her boots touched the ground. “I still want to see the falls. I’ve never seen them in winter,” she told him. Her teasing smile made him growl and readjust.
Shane went ahead of her on the trail so he didn’t have to watch that ass swaying in front of him, but he kept all his senses trained on Bonnie. Fuck, he wanted to taste her, lay her out like a goddamn feast.
They hiked in silence for a while and then Bonnie started asking him silly questions like what his favorite dessert was. “If I said you, would that count?” he asked.
She giggled which was surprisingly adorable. “You haven’t had me like that.”
“It wouldn’t be hard to change that,” he said, glancing back at her with a grin.
Bonnie smiled at him and Shane noticed something moving in the trees.
Instantly he went still, listening to every noise in the forest. The sound of birds was muted, almost silent. He could hear the wind through the trees, the river, and the falls a mile away, but he couldn’t hear the birds.
“Get over here,” he snapped, holding his hand out while he searched for that movement again.
Everything was still in the frozen air. There weren’t even any other humans on the trail he could hear. There was a pair on a different trail, but that was far from where they were.