"Why?"
"I have a need to know every detail of things." Iain shrugged shamelessly. I nodded in understanding. That made sense. I was the same way.
"Well, okay. It was Jenna. Is. And she still doesn't want to go to the police or anything," I added before Iain could suggest the legal route. "That won't work."
"Why not? Now she's got physical proof," Iain pressed. The kettle started to whistle, and he absently took it off the burner and poured water into two already prepared mugs.
I was definitely a little uncomfortable with this conversation.
"Do you trust me, Harlow?" Iain asked, tipping his head as he looked at me inquisitively.
I paused, thinking about it for a moment. "I do, actually," I said, surprising myself.
His smile was radiant. "I won't tell anyone anything you say to me, or anything we do. I would never jeopardize you. I guess I just want to know so I can help you help her."
"Okay." I sighed, sitting down at the tiny table in Iain's little kitchen. He finished making the tea and handed me mine before sitting down across from me. "Jenna can't report this because the rapist is the Police Chief's son. Apparently, he would just have it swept it under the rug."
"Jesus." Iain's brows furrowed again. "That's a tougher situation than I expected."
"Tell me about it," I said in agreement. "I literally have no idea what to tell this poor girl. I suggested abortion, but she was against it."
"Are you? Against abortion?" Iain asked, interested in my answer.
I froze. I wasn't. Had I gotten pregnant from one of my rapists, I would have…but I didn't want to tell Iain that, because I'd have to talk about my reasons.
"I'm pro-choice. A woman's body is her body. If she doesn't want a pregnancy, especially one that resulted from a rape, I think she should have the right to make that choice," I said instead, looking into my tea. I didn’t exactly like tea – I was more of a coffee girl, but I didn’t want to hurt Iain’s feelings after he had gone to the trouble of making it.
"I agree, actually," Iain said. "I know I teach at a Catholic school, and was raised Catholic, but I'm very modern with my beliefs."
"Well, she's against abortion…as I said. So I really don't know how to help her…aside from suggesting she skip school for some retail therapy, I mean."
"What about adoption?" Iain asked.
"I could suggest that," I offered. "But I think she's terrified of her parents' reaction."
"I'm sure their reaction wouldn't be nearly as terrifying if they knew the circumstances."
"I don't think she wants to share with them," I pointed out. "In any case, that's what's going on."
"Well, thanks for telling me," Iain said soberly. "If adoption is something she'd consider, I have some contacts I could get to you to give her."
"Contacts?" I asked.
Iain scratched the top of his head and smiled gently at me. “Yeah, adoption agencies and what not."
"Why do you have that?" I pressed, instantly envisioning him visiting adoption agencies with the blank faced woman he'd been engaged too.
"My sister is infertile. She and her husband have been dealing with many adoption agencies over the years."
"I'm sorry," I said, feeling a little embarrassed at having pried into his family's personal life.
"Don't be." Iain's hand reached across the table and took mine. I felt the sparks of lust firing up in my belly, as they always did when I was around him.
The next morning, Jake hunted me down in the hallway. "Have you been avoiding me?"
"No, sorry." I yawned, exhausted from my late night with Iain. "I've just been…busy."
"With who?"
I gave him a level look, wondering what his deal was. I knew Jake had a thing for me, and that he would probably continue on having a thing for me unless I did something to put me off limits.
"With my boyfriend," I answered.
"You have a boyfriend? Since when?" The disappointment was evident in Jake's face.
"A few weeks. Why?" I tried to play dumb.
Jake shook his head, forcing a look of indifference on his face. "No reason." He shrugged. "Wanna meet in the parking lot for a mid-day sesh, or would your new boyfriend object to you hanging out with me?" He said the last bit with a little more bitterness than he intended, and tried to ease his question with a smile.
"He'll be fine with it." I rolled my eyes. "I'm always up for a mid-day sesh. See you then," I said, heading into the stairwell before he could follow me.
I was getting my notebooks out of my locker for my morning class—anthropology—when Riley sauntered up to me with an invitation to his Halloween party that Saturday. I had to physically refrain from rolling my eyes at him.
"I don't know, Riley; I'm probably working," I told him, barely looking at the invitation. I knew that wasn't true. I still kept my Saturday evenings and Sunday mornings free so I could hang out with Iain at his place.
"Come on," Riley drawled. "It's gonna be amazing. Best costume wins a forty."
"I'll think about it," I told him. But there wasn't anything to think about. I wasn't going to go.
For one, I didn't want to risk the chance of running into the Police Chief's son. I didn't let fear overtake my every thought, but I was smart enough to know that going somewhere he was likely to be was definitely not a bright move. Second, it was the one-year anniversary of Lauren's death. It was a Halloween party we'd been driving home from when we got into the accident. Lauren and I had gone as a sexy cop and a sexy prisoner. Third, Iain and I had already made plans. We were going to have a scary movie marathon. The idea of cuddling up on Iain's couch, wrapped up in his arms while I tried hard to not relive the accident and Lauren's death was much more appealing than going to a party at Riley's, where I'd undoubtedly be reliving it. By myself, because Iain wouldn't be able to go, obviously.
"Suit yourself." Riley shrugged and started down the hall toward his cluster of friends.
The school day dragged on and on, and finally, I ran into Jenna after last bell. She was walking away from Callie and Tara with an irritated look on her face. I quickly approached her.
"Do you have a moment?" I asked, wanting to relay Iain's suggestion to her. She looked surprised to see me walking beside her.
"Oh, yeah," she said, slowing down a little. We both glanced behind us at Callie and Tara, who were scowling in our direction. "Did you want a ride home? I've got my car here. It'd probably be better to talk there." She added the last part in a hushed voice, barely above a whisper.
"Well, I work, but a ride to work would be cool." I enjoyed walking, but I wasn't about to turn down a free ride when it was offered.
"Okay, where do you work?"
"The diner," I answered as we walked out the doors that led to the parking lot. Jenna led me to a gunmetal gray Hyundai. It looked a couple years old, and the interior was perfect. "Whoa, nice car."
"Thanks, my dad bought it for me," Jenna answered, looking a little embarrassed. She hit the unlock button on her key remote. I opened the door, sliding quickly into the passenger seat.
"So…what was up with Tara and Callie?" I asked, unsure whether I should just dive in or talk a bit first. My friendship skills were still a little rusty.
"Oh." Jenna frowned. "They're pissed at me because I don't want to go to Riley's stupid Halloween party. It's all anyone's talking about, and I just don't want to go."
"Understandably so," I said. "I won't be going either."
"Really?" Jenna looked at me, surprised.
"Yeah…really. Last time wasn't exactly fun." I regretted saying it. Obviously it hadn't been fun. "I'm sorry. Didn't mean to remind you."
"No, it's okay." Jenna sighed. She put her car in reverse and carefully backed out. "It's not like I don't have a daily reminder already."
"Have you told your parents yet?" I asked gently.
Her eyes widened in horror. "No! I can't tell them. They'll definitely disown me. I guess one of Dad's co-workers daughter
s is pregnant. She's in high school too, and you should have seen how they were carrying on about it." Jenna drew in a shaky breath.
"You're going to have to tell them," I said. "They are going to start to notice."
"I know." Jenna took another breath. "I just feel like I need a plan."
"Have you thought about—" I started to say, but she cut me off.
"I can't have an abortion!" she almost yelled.
“Jesus Jenna, chill out.” I clenched my teeth in aggravation at her outburst. I was only trying to help, and I didn't enjoy being yelled at, it made me feel defensive. But I knew she was going through a very traumatic experience. It couldn't be easy. I softened my expression when I looked at her. "I was going to ask if you'd thought about adoption yet."
"Oh, sorry." Jenna blushed, looking mortified about her outburst. "No. I haven't really thought about that. Stupid, huh?"
"No, you've got a lot on your mind," I told her. She frowned, looking dejected. "What is it?"
"Who would want to adopt a…rape baby?" she whispered, looking horrified. "I mean, if I don't want it, who else would?" She looked extremely crestfallen and guilty to even be suggesting such a thing. I was rendered speechless.
"I'm sure that doesn't matter," I tried, inwardly cursing myself when I realized how that sounded. "I mean, I'm sure there are some couples out there who have all the love in the world to offer a baby. It's not the baby's fault…Ugh, I'm making this worse, aren't I?"
Jenna had tears streaming down her cheek that she wiped away furiously. We were waiting for our chance to leave the school parking lot—it was always congested at three o’clock.
"No, it's not you, it's my stupid emotions." Jenna laughed bitterly. "Anyway, I'll give it some thought."
"I could get you some pamphlets," I offered.
"That'd be good." She nodded. "Um…there was something I wanted to ask you."
"What is it?" I asked.
"Would you come with me to my first ultrasound appointment? I don't want to go alone. I have to drive to Sudbury—I don't want to run into anyone that knows me." We exited the school parking lot and drove toward the diner. It would only take three minutes.
"Yeah, of course!" I answered immediately. "When is it?"
"November fifteenth…" Jenna trailed off, pulling into the diner parking lot. "Sorry to ask. I was going to just suck it up, but…"
"No, it's alright. I'll be there, promise," I assured her. "I've gotta go in now, but if you wanted to grab something to eat—"
"No thanks, I can't handle greasy food right now," Jenna said, looking a little green at my suggestion. "No offence or anything."
I laughed. "I don't cook the food, so none taken. Thanks for the ride!"
"Thanks…for everything." Jenna smiled weakly.
I got out of her car and went to close the door.
"Wait!" Jenna said, hesitating slightly and looking even more embarrassed. "If you don't have anything to do that night of the party, I'll be free if you want to hang out."
"Yeah, that sounds…good," I said sincerely, smiling at her. She waved again and I closed the door. I stood in the parking lot for a couple of minutes and watched as she sped off.
I was working with Danielle again. She waved at me warmly when I walked inside. The entire diner was decorated for Halloween; I had to duck under a curtain of spider webs upon my arrival.
"Isn't it great?" Danielle squealed, excited. "I did most of it. Ryan helped! Halloween's my favourite time of year. Especially this year! Liam's first Halloween. He's going to be a penguin!"
"Cute!" I genuinely smiled at Danielle's enthusiasm, and the mental image of cute little Liam in a penguin costume. I tried to ignore the dull, hollow ache in my chest. Halloween used to be one of my favourite holidays too, but this year, it would be a difficult. Hard to believe it would be one whole year since Lauren had died.
"Okay, what's up, Princess of Darkness?" Danielle asked seriously, one hand on her hip.
"Nothing!" I quickly said, schooling my features. There was no way I was going to talk to Danielle about anything going on in my head.
She looked at me skeptically. "I don't believe that. If you change your mind and need to talk, you know where to find me."
"Thanks," I said, a little awkwardly. I made my way into the back room to change into my uniform, completely thrown. Where had my ability to appear like a stone statue gone? Suddenly, people were reading me easily. Or maybe the difference was that people were starting to care about my moods.
It made me incredibly uncomfortable. What if they could read what was happening between Iain and I? So far, nobody had made any comments or given any looks. Then again, I was careful to avoid looking at Iain in class, or talking directly to him.
I went about my shift in a little bit of a distracted daze as I pondered this slight predicament. When I was halfway through restocking the condiments, Danielle nudged me from behind.
"Oooh, Harlow," she whispered. "Check it out! That hottie from before is sitting in your section again. Oh my God! I think he likes you!"
I glanced over, seeing Iain seated at the same table I had served him the first time he came to the diner. He smiled warmly at me, winking, when Danielle turned her focus to me.
"Oh…"
"Oh what? Go serve him before I do," Danielle joked, tossing a menu at me. I rolled my eyes and approached Iain's table.
"What can I get for you tonight?" I asked, trying to hide my nervousness with an easy smile. I was ecstatic that he was there, but he hadn't been back to the diner since that one time—since before our relationship started. Aside from our classes together, we weren't seen out in public. I couldn't help but worry that Danielle was reading our body language, that'd she'd tell someone and someone would know that Iain taught at the Catholic high school and then our relationship would be out in the open. I pictured Iain behind bars and frowned deeply. That was the last thing I wanted.
"The special, and maybe some of that famous cherry pie for dessert," Iain replied, not even bothering to look at the menu. He was looking at me like I was the dessert, which I'm sure was the intention. Then he leaned forward so that only I could hear. "This is for dropping your pencil in class today," he whispered, winking.
I blushed, thinking about how I had purposely dropped my pencil and reached forward to grab it, knowing that Iain would be able to have a full frontal view.
"Alright then. I'll get you the special and once you've finished with that, I'll bring you some cherry pie," I said, smirking. "Would you like a coffee while you wait?"
Iain nodded, pleased with himself for successfully bringing me out of my foul mood. I shook my head as I walked away from him, quickly grabbing a hot cup of coffee. I returned to his table, leaning forward a little more than necessary to put his hot beverage down in front of him.
"Enjoy," I said, smiling coyly. I bit my lip a little, knowing that he was staring at me and knowing exactly what I was doing to him. Then I stood up quickly and went to check on a couple other customers in my section and do my side work. I made sure to lean forward a few times while scrubbing the table in front of him vigorously, occasionally making eye contact with him and licking my lips. Two could play at this game, and I was so enthralled in it that I forgot where we were.
"Wow, he's so into you," Danielle whispered, shocking me. I hadn't known she'd been paying attention to our display. I cursed myself; we hadn't been very discreet at all.
Despite the nervousness I was feeling at having Danielle pick up on our game, I gave a mischievous, uncaring smirk. "Poor soul."
"What do you mean?" Danielle asked, playfully shoving me. "He's hot. Are you nuts, lady?"
"I already have a boyfriend," I said, shrugging. I scowled in Iain's direction and he suppressed a grin.
I ignored Iain for the rest of the time he was there. He frowned slightly as I handed him his receipt, sensing my mood was no longer playful. He looked down at the single word of "after" written on it and nodded as he read. He sl
ipped into his jacket and left the diner without looking at me again.
I wonder if I had offended him by my sudden mood change. Oh well. I sighed inwardly. I still had another hour left of my shift before I could explain myself.
* * *
It was Danielle's night to lock up, so I left a little earlier. Daylight savings time meant that it was darker than dark out, and instead of feeling like nine, it actually felt more like eleven o’clock. I shivered against the cold, late October chill, pulling my sweater hood up over my hair. I put my ear buds in, turning up my iPhone music to fairly loud. Despite not being able to hear anything but Five Finger Death Punch, I kept full attention on my surroundings, making sure that I was constantly aware of who was around me. My heart was pounding, it was so dark and of course my thoughts instantly imagined Andrew lurking in the corner, waiting to pounce out and attack. I inwardly laughed at myself. Don't live in fear, I scolded. I knew better than that. But still, it was hard to calm my nerves, especially because I had the sensation that someone was watching me.
I started thinking about Jenna again, and how she must have been feeling. I mulled over the entire situation for what seemed like the thousandth time that week.
By the time I got to Iain's house, I still wasn't any more enlightened on Jenna's predicament, and I just wanted to forget about it all for a bit. Luckily, I was in the right place. Iain certainly was a great distraction.
"Hey," he greeted, stepping back to let me into the warmth of his foyer.
"Hey yourself," I said, frowning slightly as I remembered Danielle's intense line of questioning after he'd left.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing’s wrong." I sighed, slipping out of my coat and hanging it on the hook. I dropped my bag by the door. "Danielle just…Danielle thought you were into me."
"I am into you," Iain growled sensually, stepping forward and embracing me. My heart felt as if it was jump starting.
"Well, isn't it dangerous for people to know that?" I asked, despite the betraying fluttering of my eyes as he kissed my neck. I hated swooning, but Iain constantly made me swoon. I pushed on his chest, trying to get him to take this conversation seriously.
Collide Series Box Set Page 7