by Nora Ash
“I guess there are upsides to being a cougar,” I said, and then cried out when he rewarded my lip with a hard thrust. And another.
When I first heard my phone, Liam had my legs over his shoulders and was driving into me at a merciless pace.
I reached out for my nightstand on pure instinct, but Liam grabbed my wrist, stopping my attempt at answering whoever was calling without missing a beat.
“I’m not done with you yet,” he panted. With an ease I still hadn’t gotten used to, he pulled out and flipped me onto my stomach before pushing his throbbing cock back up inside of me with a hard thrust. “If you think answering the phone mid-fuck is a good idea, clearly I’m not doing you hard enough!”
It took me four orgasms and I don’t know how much time before Liam finally gave in to exhaustion and collapsed on his back on the bed next to me.
My ears were ringing and blurred dots danced before my eyes as I lay beside him and desperately tried to suck in enough oxygen to not pass out, but I was vaguely aware that I had an insistent grin across my face, and that every single cell in my depleted body was humming with bone-deep satisfaction.
“If—if you plan… plan to make a habit of having sex with… older women…you need to learn to pace yourself,” I panted in between gasps for air. “I don’t know how I’m not dead.”
Liam let out a breathless chuckle. “How you’re not dead? It hurts when I move! God, woman…” He rolled over onto his side with a theatrical groan and pulled me into his arms.
I sighed happily and cuddled closer against him, content to just feel his body wrap around mine as the endorphins in my body made my blood sing.
If Nirvana was an actual thing, this was it.
The sharp ring from my phone pulled me out of my blissed-out haze with a start. Ignoring Liam’s protesting groan, I reached out and grabbed the device, swiping right on the screen.
“Hello?”
“God, Audrey! Are you okay?”
I frowned at the shrillness of the panicked voice on the other end. “Eileen? Yeah, I’m fine. What’s wrong?”
“What’s wrong? You have a date with a stranger, and then don’t show up to work the next day is what’s wrong! I thought you’d been murdered!”
I blinked. “What do you mean ‘don’t show up for work’?” A horrible sense of foreboding settled in my gut, and I fought my lax body to sit up. “What time is it?”
“Ten thirty. Audrey… what have you been doing this morning?” Eileen’s voice gained a distinctly teasing note.
“Shit!” Sheer panic made me jolt off the bed in one jump. A quick glance at my phone’s display confirmed the time. “Dammit! I’m on my way!” I hung up, tossed the phone on the bed, and dove for my wardrobe. Only when I was frantically searching through my underwear drawer did it dawn on me that I’d meant to do the laundry last night.
“Running late?” Liam asked, pulling my attention from my desperate attempt at shoving my boobs into a bra that hadn’t fit properly for the past ten years.
I cast a look at him over my shoulder—and felt something twinge in my gut at the sight of his unruly red hair and that eternal laugh in his eyes. He was resting on one elbow in my messy bed watching me get dressed, his perfect body still covered in a light sheen of sweat from our sex marathon.
And I knew with sudden and horrifying certainty that I needed him.
Not his sex, not the one-night stand we’d both known this night would be. No, I needed his laughter, his warmth—and that nearly tangible light that seemed to radiate off him like rays of pure, unadulterated life. I’d never felt as alive as I had these past sixteen hours or so in his company, and I knew I never would again if he walked out of my life.
It felt like a donkey kick to the gut.
I sank back down onto the bed, my previous panic completely drained by the nauseating realization that I didn’t want this to be the last time I saw Liam Steel.
This was supposed to be a one-night thing. Men like Liam didn’t do anything more than that—I’d known that when I kissed him in the pub, when he took me up against Mrs. Peterson’s front door, and when I fell asleep in his arms from sheer exhaustion several hours later.
But the thought of never seeing him again was unbearable.
“Liam?” My voice wasn’t much more than a hoarse whisper.
“Mm?”
I glanced at him again and bit my lip to steel myself. He looked so completely relaxed, like nothing in this world could ever shake his good mood or quiet confidence, and I wished with everything I was that I could have just a little of his easy strength right about now.
“I… I know this was supposed to be… that this is a one-time sorta deal, but I…” I drew in a deep breath. “Do you think, maybe, we could do this again?”
“I assume you don’t mean right now?” There was a hint of amusement in his voice, but also a gentleness that hadn’t been there before.
“I… I really need to see you again.” I could have swallowed my own tongue. Not the kind of thing to say to a player like Liam.
He was quiet for a moment. Then he moved in the bed behind me before one of his large hands engulfed mine completely. I noticed a small scar on his thumb as he stroked it across the back of my hand, then blushed when an image of that same thumb brushing over my nipple last night flashed before my mind’s eye.
“I’d like to see you again, Audrey.”
The hesitation in his voice hinted that there was more to that sentence
“But?” I asked, staring unblinkingly at the scar on his thumb. My stomach felt like a tight, painful knot.
He was silent for a few seconds. Then he grabbed my chin with his free hand and made me look up to meet his eyes. They had their usual gleam of mischief, completely free of any hesitation now. “But nothing. I’d be pretty fucking stupid to say no to more time in your bed, love.”
The tightness in my stomach uncoiled, relief flooding my entire body as he dipped his lips to mine in a kiss that had my heart skipping a beat. I knew he’d considered something before he said yes to seeing me again, but I was too relieved to linger on what it might be.
So long as I knew this wouldn’t be the last time I got to feel his light envelop me, I didn’t care what had made him hesitate.
8
Liam
“Are you limping?”
I ignored my twin’s amused expression and let my eyes glide over the other people lounging in our shared living room. Our brother Blaine sat with his arm around his redheaded wife on the sofa in front of the TV, and on the floor over by the floor-to-ceiling window, their toddler was busy playing on a square blanket.
“Blaine, Mira,” I greeted our guests as I walked from the hallway—doing my best not to limp—and threw myself on the sofa next to them. I couldn’t quite suppress the small groan when my worn body impacted with leather.
“It looks like you had a good night,” Louis continued, eying me up with a small measure of interest. “Maybe I should give the girl a go after all?”
It wasn’t an unusual comment, not for us. We’d shared more girls than I could count over the years, our identical appearance leaving the lass none the wiser. What was unusual, however, was the flare of anger deep in my gut at my twin’s casual suggestion. I pressed a hand to my stomach and frowned. Where the hell did that come from? We shared everything—women were no exception, so why did the thought of my brother bedding an unsuspecting Audrey make everything inside me feel hot and painful?
“Louis! Don’t tell me you two still trick women like that.” The disapproving hiss came from Mira, but despite her sharp tone, her face displayed exasperation rather than outrage. “You’re too old to act like horny teenagers.”
Louis’ face cracked in a wide grin. “Nah, love, we’ll never be too old for that. We can’t all settle into domestic obedience like our poor brother here.”
Blaine scoffed at the dig. “I think it’d do you some good. I can’t wait until some bird finally shows up on your doorst
ep with a ginger kid or two—that should settle you right down.”
Louis and I shared a look and gave a synchronized shudder of horror. We’d made a pact long ago to never, ever get ourselves into a situation where pregnancy might be a possible outcome. As much as we both hated the idea of commitment, of some girl coming between us, neither of us would be able to abandon a kid we’d fathered. The natural solution had been a pact to always johnny up when we shagged a lass.
Except, for the first time in my entire life, I’d almost forgotten the second I’d felt Audrey’s soft body against mine.
“If you’re angling for a playmate for Aidan, I’m almost positive Marcus will have his girl knocked up by now,” Louis said. “You heard anything from him?”
Blaine shook his head. “He’ll be in touch when we’ve figured out how to take care of Dad.”
And there it was. The one subject we’d been avoiding for the past two months, waiting for the right moment. After our brother Marcus narrowly escaped the country when he attacked our father to save his fiancée, William Steel had been on highest alert. It had taken a lot ass-kissing before we no longer saw his men lurking around outside our apartment, watching us, ensuring his remaining sons stayed in line. We had made sure to stay away from Blaine, save a few casual meetings in public, so as to not raise his suspicions that we were plotting something.
To make him believe we didn’t know he’d killed our brother Jeremy instead of sending him to America to deal with business connections, like he’d told us for the past few years. Knowledge Marcus had shared with us before he’d been forced to flee.
“He’s not going to step down,” I said to no one in particular.
“We have to kill him,” Louis said, finishing my sentence. “A simple hit would be the easiest, but he’s keeping Wesley and a few other faithful guys with him at all times now, even when we visit him. And he’s never within range of a long-distance rifle. It’d have to be done up close… but there’s zero percent chance of making it out alive for whoever does it.”
“And then there’s the question of Isaac,” Blaine said softly. “If Dad dies before we can prove he set Isaac up, he’ll rot in prison for the rest of his life.”
Isaac. Louis and I exchanged a look, and I knew what he was thinking. Our brother, who’d spent the past nearly two years in jail and refused to see any of us after a drug deal gone wrong. It had been a shock to both of us when Blaine came forward with proof that our dad had set him up to take the fall. Knowing our father had gone after his own blood, killing Jeremy and selling out Isaac, meant none of us were safe—and if there was one thing I wouldn’t survive, it was losing Louis. We’d never talked about it, but I knew he felt the same. We loved all our brothers fiercely and would protect them at any cost, but the bond we had with each other was something more than that. He’d been there every day of my life, through all the tough shit, through the death of our mother and every hit we’d been forced to execute while working for our father. Louis had been by my side as I had been by his, and if we hadn’t had each other, I knew without a shadow of a doubt we would’ve been lost in the same kind of darkness that had nearly swallowed up Marcus before he met Evelyn.
I’d always felt guilty for having Louis to lean on when I saw my other brothers struggle with the weight of our shared childhood on their own, but both Blaine and Marcus had pulled through with the help of the women they’d eventually fallen in love with. Isaac had no one. He was entirely on his own, locked up like an animal because our father had betrayed him in the worst way possible within the underworld. Well… the second-worst way. I pressed down the pang of loss at the memory of Jeremy.
“We’ve also not discussed what will happen once Dad’s gone,” Louis said. “Our Family’s claim to London’s throne is already shaky, at best. If we lose our patriarch, it would be nearly impossible to keep it.”
“Maybe that’s not such a bad thing.”
Both Louis and I stared at Blaine as he shifted on the couch. I didn’t miss how he pulled Mira closer to his body.
“Have you never thought what it would be like to get out?” he continued. “I know you two hate the darker side of the business, and I…” He glanced at his son playing by the window. “I’ve got him to think about.”
I exchanged a look with Louis. Sure, we’d both wished on a few occasions we didn’t have to deal with the bloodier sides of crime, but it was all we knew.
“I don’t think there is an out for us, mate,” I said with a soft sigh. “The second the Steel Family loses its footing, every crook in town is gonna be out for our blood. Short of disappearing like Marcus did, we’re stuck.”
Something passed over Blaine’s face, and I frowned.
“You’ve been thinking about it,” Louis said. His voice betrayed my own shock. If anyone was made for the mafia life, it was Blaine. He’d always been ruthless but in control, wielding the power that came with our name with ease. “About leaving London?”
Blaine shrugged and glanced down at his wife. “Only if we must. I know we have obligations to our men, but I won’t put the welfare of my wife and son on the line to keep control over an empire built on lies.”
“This is our home,” Mira said. Her voice was quiet, but had a core of steel as she returned her husband’s gaze. “None of us want to leave it behind. I’m not saying you should sacrifice everything to continue being in control of London’s underworld, but don’t throw it all away in some misguided belief that Aidan and I can’t be safe here. We’ve been safe for a long time now, despite everything that’s going on. If you want to change your father’s legacy, I know you can do it. Together. But not before he’s gone.”
I whistled a low tune and saw Louis shoot the curvy woman an appreciative grin.
“Well, well, look who’s come around to the criminal side of life,” I teased.
“I’m pretty sure I remember a time where you would’ve literally rather lived on Europe’s streets than be part of the Steel empire,” Louis continued.
She cocked an eyebrow at us. “If we all disappear, someone else will fill the power vacuum. Someone as bad as your father, most likely. If we stay, we can change things. Try and lessen the violence.”
“Leave it to you to strive for a better underworld,” Blaine said, an amused tilt to his lips. But he was also looking at her with the same sort of awe I’d seen in his eyes before. Those two were fucking meant for each other, as baffling as it was to understand. Mira had given our brother the light he needed to balance the darkness that came with our world, and he’d given her strength. And for the briefest moment, as I looked at them, my thoughts swirled back to the woman I’d spent the night with and how it had seemed impossible to tell her no when she’d asked to see me again.
Last night had been the first night in months I’d been able to forget all the darkness and betrayal at knowing what our father had done. Somehow, I’d managed to find a moment’s respite between Audrey’s thighs, and I didn’t have the strength nor the will to deny myself. It’d been like having healing salve smeared on a burn, and the relief had been instant and addictive.
“So we stay. And fight. If we can.” Louis said, breaking me out of my thoughts.
“Yes,” Blaine said after a short exchange of looks with his wife. “Once Dad’s dead.”
“Which brings us right back to the how,” Louis sighed. “And when.”
“I… might know a way,” Blaine said. The hesitation in his voice had me exchanging another look with Louis.
“I take it there’s a major caveat, since you didn’t lead with it?” I asked.
“Yeah.” Blaine grimaced. “It involves working with someone we know’s gunning for our Family’s demise.”
I felt my own eyebrows mirror Louis’ as he arched one in question.
“There are rumblings that those of our supporters who have fallen away after I turned in the Clerys are gathering around another Family. They’re not yet big enough to take us on, but they’re hungry for it. If we m
ake them believe there’s a rift in our Family, we can use them. It shouldn’t be hard, since everyone knows Marcus is in hiding.
“Say one of us go to the other Family, let them know he’s considering switching sides to help Marcus and Isaac out. And in return for their help in taking Dad down, we’ll give them control over part of London once it’s done. That way, we get the manpower we need for a full-scale attack, and don’t risk any of our men turning against us mid-fight. The caveat…”
“…is that if they decide to flip on us and warn Dad that one of us is a traitor, whoever goes is dead,” I finished.
“Yeah.” Blaine looked from me to Louis. “Whoever goes will risk his life. But I don’t see any other option. I’ve been going over this so many times now, I don’t see we have another choice.”
“Ruling London’s underworld alongside another ambitious Family is going to be a challenge,” Louis said. He looked straight at me. “But I agree. If one of our rivals are looking to usurp us… this is the best shot we’ve got.”
I nodded. “We’ll go. Louis and I.”
“You don’t have to—”
Louis raised a hand to still Blaine’s protest. “Yeah, we do. Your first priority is Mira and Aidan. Liam and I… we have each other. We got this.”
“Thank you.” The quiet voice belonged to Mira, but when I looked at Blaine, I saw her gratitude reflected in his eyes. Not for the first time, I felt a flicker of horror at how vulnerable he must feel through all this shit with our dad, knowing one wrong move could cost him his wife and child. Sure, they were protected better than the royal fucking family, but if the past few months had taught us anything, it was that William Steel would stop at nothing to keep us all in line.
“It’s decided then. Guess we just need to know who we need to pay a visit to in the next few days?” My tone was much easier than I felt. “Who wins the chance to take on London’s biggest crime lord?”