by Lynn Kelling
Brennan shrugged. “Hadn’t really noticed,” he murmured, picking at the edge of his napkin. Lifting his gaze to the café’s entrance, Brennan seemed to be reaching out for them, their other halves. Luka knew the feeling. More and more, it just wasn’t the same when the four of them were separated.
“I’m sure they’ll just be a minute,” Luka murmured to Brennan.
“Yeah,” Brennan sighed, still watching.
Chapter 21
Hard Truths
Out by the parking lot, Evan walked around the café and the adjoining pharmacy’s main building, heading for the shelter of the alley between it and a large, sprawling office complex. With his hands shoved in his pockets, he stepped into the shadows and waited there.
He didn’t have to wait long. Alek grabbed him from behind, spinning him and backing him up against the brick wall. Immediately, he started to pat Evan down, feeling his pockets for more cigarettes. When he found none, he planted his hands on either side of Evan’s head and bore down on him.
Evan’s breath was quickened. His gaze was fixed on Alek’s mouth and he wondered if Alek would lash out at him like he did with Luka. Maybe Alek would grab him by the throat, throw a punch or two. Just as he thought these things, though, Evan knew how ridiculous they were. Alek was too wrapped up in protecting him to ever lay hands on him like that.
“What the fuck is this? This little streak of self-destruction?”
“M-maybe I didn’t think you’d care,” Evan stuttered softly.
“Well, you were wrong.”
“I guess I was.”
“Do you need a demonstration of how serious I am about this? You need to think about your choices. That’s the shit that gets you into trouble. We’re going to have a little lesson, you and me,” Alek growled.
His mouth hovered above Evan’s. Evan’s breath caught, his mouth working silently for a second, parting around his soundless gasp. He knew it was quite apparent how much this was turning him on. Alek reacted in kind, letting Evan bait him. It made Evan feel steadier the more control Alek took of the situation. It was a plea for distraction. Evan needed it to get through the stress of dealing with his father. And Alek seemed more than happy to comply.
“L-like a punishment?”
“Just like that,” Alek said in a raspy, low voice, thick with promise. “You want to be hard on your body? You need something to suck on to keep your mind off your troubles? I can help with both of those things, no cigarettes, inevitable emphysema or lung cancer required.”
“Wha-what’re you…” Evan stammered, then choked off a brittle moan when Alek grabbed a handful of his cock and squeezed it through his jeans. Hips canting forward into Alek, Evan gasped and writhed.
“Jesus. You’re fucking hard,” Alek marveled, victorious. “You get off on this, huh—the thought of being punished, and some big, strong man putting your ass in line when it needs it? Sure you do… Jailbait. You’ve been acting out for years and no one’s ever bothered to spank you for it.”
“Alek,” Evan moaned. God, it was true. Alek had no idea how true it was.
“Get back inside and if I see you so much as think about having a smoke, I’ll personally spank your sweet ass raw right in front of Daddy instead of waiting ‘til our little meet and greet is over like I intend to do. You got me?”
“I-I…” Evan stammered.
Alek squeezed tighter. Evan twisted helplessly, whimpering, “Fuck.”
“You got me, Jailbait?”
“Y-yes. I’m sorry.”
“Not as sorry as you’re gonna be. What do you want, hmm? The hand or the belt? You ever gotten it good and hard, ‘til your ass feels like it’s fucking on fire and you can’t help but cry out with each smack?”
Evan shuddered, thrusting in a steady rhythm against Alek’s open hand, holding on to the front of Alek’s shirt, clawing at him. He was flushed with lust and couldn’t meet Alek’s eyes directly.
Glancing around them, Alek pulled his hand away and pinned Evan’s arms to his sides. “Stop,” he growled. “You really think I’m gonna let you get off right now? You think you deserve that? You don’t get to come until I let you. Get yourself under control. Now.”
Evan gulped. With a deep, unsteady breath, he willed his flesh to soften and his brain to jump-start. After a few long moments he chuckled, asking with a cocky smirk, “What’re you gonna do, Aleksy? Bend me over your knee? You’re bullshitting me, right? This is some kind of scheme to distract me from smoking.”
“Do I look like I’m bullshitting you?” Alek stared, seriously. “Obviously you respond best to a firm hand, so that’s what you’ll get. Now, we’re going back in there, so unless you want Daddy to see your dick tenting your pants…”
“Oh god.” He groaned. “Stop talking about spanking me then!”
“Stop asking about it.”
Alek backed up a few steps, folding his arms, prepared to wait.
After a few long, silent, tense minutes, Evan seemed more composed and muttered, “Okay, let’s go back. They probably think we’re screwing out here or something.”
“Where on Earth would they get that idea?” Alek countered sarcastically. “Ready when you are, princess.”
Evan rolled his eyes, scoffing, and tried adamantly not to show how a secret part of himself enjoyed that nickname. He started walking and got all the way to the entrance of the café, within sight of Brennan, Luka, and Charlie, but not within earshot. He paused there and said quietly without facing Alek, who he knew was right behind him, “Jimmy knows. That’s the real reason why I was smoking. Well, that and Brennan’s breakdown which majorly fucked up my willpower. Jimmy knows everything—that I’m fucking you and Luka and Brennan. He tricked me into admitting it and he threw it in my face before trying to pretend like he didn’t hate me for it.”
“Shit,” Alek groaned.
“I’m not letting him get in my head,” Evan said defiantly. Alek moved around to face him, holding Evan’s shoulders. “I told him it wasn’t his business, and it’s not. It… oh, hell.” He sighed and braced a hand against Alek’s jaw, stretching up. Alek met him halfway. They kissed. Evan’s lips parted easily for Alek’s tongue when Alek pressed in a little deeper, frowning with concentration and anguish.
They stood there on the sidewalk together, in sight of everyone, and Evan kissed Alek—out of defiance to Jimmy, to Charlie, to the world in general, not caring anymore who saw or what they thought. It scared him to death to do it, but the victory of his boldness outweighed his trepidation by far.
“You’re incredible. You know that, right?” Alek said before pulling away.
Taking Evan’s hand, Alek led the way back to the table as the three awaiting them watched on.
With the taste and feel of Alek’s kiss lingering, reinvigorating him, Evan took his seat and spread his cloth napkin over his lap as their food had already been brought to the table. Clearing his throat, he glanced around the table and said quietly to Brennan, “I’m sorry I upset you. It won’t happen again—the smoking. I promise.”
Then Evan turned to his father, his jaw clenched and his will renewed. Somewhat startled at the gentle affection in Charlie’s eyes, Evan said, “Dad, I should have been honest with you about a lot of things, but I should have told you I quit. I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have to apologize, son. I don’t blame you for being stressed. Especially since a good amount of that stress is because of me, so I’m sorry too, for what it’s worth.” Evan looked at him with real gratitude. Charlie clapped him on the shoulder, adding, “And I see you two have had your chance to kiss and make up so what do you say we have some food?”
“Dad,” Evan groaned.
“So, Alek,” Charlie started. “Brennan was telling me how he plans to study to be a nurse beginning next semester, and hopes to work at Mercy Gen when he graduates. He mentioned you work for them?”
“Yes, sir. I work in their corporate offices downtown, in the finance department. It’s an entry
-level position, but a lot of room for growth, which is important to me. Plus, I get full benefits now.”
“I thought you worked at the bar? That’s where Evan was jumped, right? I’m still trying to piece all of this out from what you’ve told me over the phone and now finding out the nature of your relationship with Evan.”
The questions were like a sucker punch, and Evan winced. All of the good his chat with Alek did melted away. Alek’s self-recrimination came right back at the implication of his job being the cause of Evan’s attack. Evan saw it in Alek’s expression, and the way he pressed his lips together like he was doing so to hold in the things he really wanted to say.
Sounding like he was chewing on the words, Alek responded with, “Yes, sir, I did work there, pulling double-duty as security and short-order cook. But I quit months ago after what happened. I would have quit earlier if I knew what the risk to Evan was. The last thing I want is to put your sons in any danger.”
“I appreciate your consideration,” Charlie told him. “Sounds like you made a good move, career-wise. A desk job has a lot of benefits the HR departments don’t list for ya, like not beating your body to hell with manual labor, getting to stay close to home, not coming home at the end of the night covered in engine or cooking grease. That’s why I’m so glad Brennan is planning to go to school. Evan, I know you care a hell of a lot about what you do. That’s why I never tried to dissuade you from that path, but man… Changing in that blue collar for a white one’s usually a good move.”
The rest of the meal went relatively smoothly, as each of the four younger men shared select pieces of who they were, what they’d been doing, and their plans for the future with the highly inquisitive elder Savage. But, Evan’s preoccupation was with everyone’s reactions to one another, to his father’s responses to Alek, Luka and Brennan and the contrast between what he knew or suspected, and what was being presented as fact. The game of it all distracted him almost enough to keep his mind off the cigarettes. Whenever he got a whiff of smoke from another table, Evan looked to Alek, who shot him a lightning quick, incredibly sharp look of warning that effectively dulled Evan’s craving with fantasies of the promised punishment Evan hoped was coming his way soon.
As everyone finished their lunches and emptied their glasses, Evan’s focus shifted to his twin. He tried to gauge how Brennan felt, to read his mind and his heart, sure if he concentrated enough, he could do it. At first, seeing Brennan’s expression was untroubled and less guarded, Evan thought he had gotten away with observing Brennan undetected.
He found out he was wrong when, mid-sentence in response to their father asking about Brennan’s propensity to cook them all dinner, Brennan caught Evan’s gaze and smiled at him with only his eyes. They shone brightly with amusement, a knowing twinkle, deep-seated love and the barest hint of intimate warmth. It made Evan smile helplessly, which he tried to hide behind his cup.
After that, it became quickly clear to Evan Brennan’s spirit had been buoyed by Charlie’s earnest curiosity regarding their lives and his patience with the limited answers he received. Having control over what Charlie knew about who Brennan was made Brennan feel more powerful and less subjected to helplessness by his fate. Once in a while Brennan would let some small truth go, handing it over to their father. The more tidbits he gave away, the clearer it was knowing aspects of Brennan’s identity was in no way a free pass to claim the right to continue to become closer to him. If it was what Brennan wanted or needed, he could put a stop to Charlie’s hope to be in his life. So it continued to be a dance between them. Brennan gave a little, Charlie tried for more and Brennan got to decide whether to give it to him.
They all pushed back from the table once Charlie paid the bill, and headed back to the parking lot. At the sidewalk, Charlie patted down his pockets, searching for something he feared he might have dropped. Excusing himself, Charlie went back to the table to look for it while the four younger men continued on.
Their vehicles were parked on the far side of a long aisle filled with cars. Once they got to them, with Charlie safely out of sight, Alek pulled Brennan aside and quickly, tenderly kissed him, saying, “See? There was nothing to worry about. Everything will be fine.”
Meanwhile, Luka nearly bowled Evan over in a bear hug, kissing the top of his head and groaning in relief. They’d done it. They survived the dreaded initial encounter. It had gone off without a hitch. Each of them brightened a little, smiling and chuckling, the weight of worry momentarily lessened with the perceived victory.
Inside the café, at quite a distance but with sharpened gaze, Charlie looked on from the shadows, biding his time. He hadn’t forgotten anything at the table; he just wanted a chance to see the boys with their guards down.
Alek’s lips locked on to Brennan’s like it was the most natural thing in the world. Evan smiled bashfully at Luka, sinking deeply into his arms. Charlie wasn’t surprised, not by a long-shot, but the finality of the visual evidence still stung. Part of him wanted to murder Alek and Luka where they stood for the gall of what they’d done to his children, luring them into such a twisted kind of arrangement. Part of him wanted to scream at Evan and Brennan, demanding they explain themselves and such behavior. Part of him, though, was simply very disappointed and intensely weary, knowing what this all meant. The lies and charade would either continue on indefinitely, or he would have to confront them and admit to what he knew. There would be the aftermath of that revelation. He’d probably wind up pushing his boys further away. He might even lose both of them forever, or he would be forced to find a way to be okay with this lifestyle they’d found themselves entangled in. Each option was its own hell.
Charlie watched Alek’s hand caress down Brennan’s lower back to his backside, groping him right out in the open, with no thought for acting with respect and decency. Luka leaned in to Evan’s ear, but it wasn’t to whisper. He sucked at the side of Evan’s neck, right under his jaw. The sight of it paralyzed Charlie, knotting his stomach in a way that seeing Alek kiss Evan outright did not. He wondered how Jimmy had done it for so long, being around the four of them and acting like the deceptive, wanton behavior on display was morally acceptable in his eyes and didn’t anger him. Charlie ripped his gaze away and waited for his fists to unclench before attempting to rejoin his family.
The afternoon found Charlie alone with his boys. The three of them sat down by the stream running through the woods not far from their home, trying to fish though the pickings were slim in those shallow waters. Alek and Luka had bid their goodbyes in order to allow Charlie some one-on-one time with his sons.
Since being left to themselves, the air between the three had been slightly strained for a reason Evan couldn’t quite figure out. Charlie had been quiet after returning from lunch. Now, sitting on folding chairs by the bank, fishing rods in hand, Evan and Brennan were asked a question which made them both groan loudly, in unison, in protest.
“You boys’re bein’ safe, aren’tcha? You using condoms?”
“Dad, for Christ’s sake,” Evan complained.
“That’s not an answer, Evan,” Charlie frowned.
Brennan spoke up. The look on his face startled Evan. He knew that look.
With a cocky little flip of his hair, Brennan said, “We were tested for STDs months ago at the local clinic. We’re in committed relationships. We’re being safe. Don’t worry.”
“So, that’s a no,” Charlie managed through gritted teeth.
“Dad…” Evan tried, feeling nauseous.
“Condoms aren’t foolproof,” Brennan retorted. “They break.”
“Trust ain’t foolproof either,” Charlie challenged.
“Can we please stop talking about this?” Evan whined.
“You’re gonna trust your life with them?” Charlie continued, “All it takes is one time, one slip up and you’ve got herpes or gonorrhea or HIV—”
“It’s my body,” Brennan interrupted. “I know who I trust with it.”
“Dad,”
Evan shouted. “Lay off. Hell, Bren’s gonna be a nurse! He gets it, okay?”
“Yeah,” Charlie squinted. “And what about you, boy? You lettin’ him screw you without even bothering with a rubber?”
“I-I can’t believe you just asked me that.” Evan gaped with astonishment, turning crimson. Without looking at his father, he shook his head and tried not to implode from seething embarrassment.
“Look, Charlie,” Brennan said severely. “We honestly are doing everything we can to be safe. We may be young, but we’re not stupid.”
Quiet descended in the woods; the only sounds were the burbling of water over rocks and the twittering of birds in the treetops. Evan refused to meet Charlie’s gaze.
“I didn’t mean to embarrass you,” Charlie said, sighing, after he couldn’t stand it anymore. “I just don’t want anything bad to happen to you. You’ve gotta admit you’ve got damn questionable luck when it comes to your health.”
Evan didn’t react, just recast his line. Brennan held his tongue, glancing between them.
“I’m trying here, all right?” Charlie said to Evan. “I don’t care one way or the other if you’re gay. But I do care about you making an effort to watch your ass.”
“So to speak,” Brennan murmured through a chuckle.
Evan shot him a sharp, disbelieving glare. Charlie laughed with Brennan and Evan scowled, “You’re both sick.”
On the way back to the house, Evan went on ahead while Charlie and Brennan lagged behind. Pulling Brennan aside, Charlie said to him solemnly, “I’ve been trying my damnedest to think of all the things I’ve wanted to say to you, everything that hasn’t been said and should’ve been long ago. There’s so much to get past with us, and it kills me, so I’m trying to look ahead, to what’s still to come, instead of looking back.
“What I’ve come up with is this. I think you should concentrate on yourself for a while, your future. It’s important and you finally have a chance to be selfish. You don’t have anyone to take care of or worry about. I know you’re dealing with a lot of change right now, what with being in a new state, a new town, with new people, missin’ yer mom and your friends, your old life, but school would be good for ya. Might take your mind off of things and set you on a good path toward having a real career. I want that for you. Dating, relationships, that’ll still be there later.”