by Lynn Kelling
He loved Alek, Luka, and Brennan so much, he couldn’t believe his luck. As unlikely a unit as they were, they worked. They filled gaps for each other, and every one of them was essential for creating just the right balance. Sure, it was scary, but what good was the day-to-day without a thrill to get the blood pumping? He knew they were bound to make more mistakes, but Evan was willing to do the hard work. If he screwed up, he would try to make it right again, and would try to remain patient with his lovers, should he be the one slighted.
The time he’d asked for in order to make up his own mind was, in retrospect, very much needed after all. The decision to take a small break from the challenging romantic and practical dynamics of existing in a foursome was the first of what Evan hoped were a series of good choices. He was much more confident in his own skin having survived one of his worst nightmares. It had left him stronger. He’d been able to process his biggest sources of trouble and reorder his priorities. Brennan came first for him, just as Luka and Alek did. Those three were the core of Evan’s life, his new family. It was time to leave the old, familiar safety of his childhood home. He wasn’t Charlie’s little boy anymore.
Looking around the car, Evan saw Alek, still professional and composed despite his casual attire, his hands wrapping the wheel at precisely ten and two, his gaze focused on the road ahead. Behind him, to his left was Luka, wearing a grin that only hinted at the excitement and joy Evan knew bubbled up within. Their eyes locked briefly, and warmth infused Luka’s face. Evan couldn’t help but remember Luka’s confession, not so long ago, of loving Evan the whole time without realizing it. Their love crossed lines, but once the lines were gone, anything was possible. And Brennan, glimpsed in the side mirror, a reflection of Evan’s reflection. Brennan didn’t see him looking, he was too busy gazing out the window at the world flying by. He was a survivor, just like Evan, whose fierce care and loyalty was one of Evan’s greatest blessings.
The car rolled to a stop in front of the new building. It was attractive enough, located on the second floor above some tidy, well-kept shops. The whole street was quaint and welcoming, bustling with shoppers, people walking their dogs, out enjoying the cool but pleasant weather. The street was lined with trees and pots overflowing with flowers.
Alek cut the engine and they all got out. Evan smiled at the wonderment he saw in Brennan’s eyes, taking in the sight of a place that wasn’t just new to him, but to all of them. They could make it home together. There would be no more need for Brennan to feel like the outsider in a new place.
Luka wandered over to the shop directly in front of them, cupping his hands against the glass to peer nosily inside. Alek, shaking his head at his brother, dug the door key out of his pocket. Taking Evan’s hand like it belonged to him, Alek led the way up to the street-level door. Once he’d unlocked, it opened up to a flight of stairs leading to the second floor.
“We’ll have to get copies of the key made,” Alek said. “A couple of them for each of us.”
“In case we lose one,” Luka added. “And we can probably move over most of our furniture from the two houses and Bren’s storage locker—”
“Next weekend, renting a truck,” Alek added.
“But it’ll be pretty big so we could just swing by to get everything in one day.”
“As long as we get most of it packed this week.”
“Since we already asked Presley and Carter to help out.”
Evan climbed step after step, right behind Alek, with Luka and Brennan bringing up the rear. Near the top, someone goosed Evan, making him yelp. Laughing, Brennan gave Evan an innocent look, as did Luka, when he glanced back to see who did it.
At the landing, Evan turned to his brother and asked, “We’re not gonna start speaking in tandem like that, are we? It’s a little scary.”
Before Brennan could answer, someone goosed Evan again, squeezing quickly between his legs from behind. He made an equally embarrassing noise, crying out, “Fucking…. Quit it!”
He glanced behind him to Alek and Luka, neither of them giving away who did it.
“That’s hilarious,” he said. “Please keep doing that.”
Alek said, “We only grab your ass because we love you.”
Then Luka asked, “You remember that day we played touch football?”
“Sure,” Evan murmured distractedly. “Why?”
“Look,” Luka grinned, doing something on his phone. He held it up for them to see. On the screen was a picture taken of the four of them, just after the game. They were all laughing, arms slung around each other as they posed for the shot, taken by Presley.
“We should get it printed out really big and hang it right here, at the top of the steps, so we can see it every time we come home.”
Brennan gave the center of Luka’s chest a hard shove, knocking him back against the wall. Twisting a fist in Luka’s shirtfront, Brennan kissed him firmly on the lips. Luka moaned softly. Pulling back, Brennan said heatedly, “You’re so fucking romantic.”
“Oh Cupcake, you have no idea,” Luka smirked, with a look that implied he was planning god-knew-what-else for their new home. Brennan made a giddy, impatient sound, snagged Evan’s hand and pulled him into the apartment with him. Alek and Luka followed them in, wandering further into the space.
“It’s not huge, because, you know, we’re not rich. Yet. But see?” Alek gestured around. “This is the living room. The dining table would go over there, next to the kitchen. There’s enough space on that wall for Luka’s exercise equipment and the bedrooms are through there.” He gestured to a short hallway to their right.
Evan took a long look around. To the left were some tall windows overlooking the street and the majority of the living area. To the right was the kitchen, with counters that wrapped around in a U shape, along with new-looking appliances, the hallway and a door.
“That door leads to a walk-in closet,” Alek said, going over to open it and let them look inside. “The closets are all huge. Great storage. It makes up for the limited space out here. At least all our stuff will be hidden away.”
“And two bathrooms!” Brennan exclaimed, smiling hugely, more happy than Evan had ever seen him before. Evan wanted to tackle him to the floor and kiss his breath away. They could christen the space, mark it as theirs—and no threat of anyone unwanted walking in, unannounced. “One off of each bedroom. Isn’t it great? We won’t have to share anymore.”
Luka cleared his throat, loudly, on purpose.
“What?” When both of Luka’s eyebrows shot up, Brennan—oblivious—demanded, “What’d I say?”
Then, Luka gave Alek a look, which Evan understood perfectly. Brennan was still playing catch-up, though.
“For now,” Alek said, seeming to speak for both of the Popovics, “we’ll be split up into two bedrooms. It doesn’t mean anything though, if we don’t want it to. We can ease into the living arrangements before deciding how things are going to work between the four of us.”
Evan wondered when they’d discussed things between them, suspecting it was while he and Brennan had been allowed to sleep in Alek’s bed as long as they wanted to, the night before.
“Ev,” Luka said, “you and Alek wake up early for work, so it makes sense anyway that you’re together. Bren and I have weirder schedules with his classes and my flex hours at the gym. We’re more likely to all get our sleep with the wall between the bedrooms in place. Other than sleeping though….”
The Popovic twins again shared a look of agreement which Evan wasn’t privy to.
Alek picked up where Luka left off. “We share everything. Food, sex—”
“Sex with food,” Luka added.
Brennan elbowed him in the side, saying, “And clothes. You would look really hot in my yoga pants, Ev.”
“You would, actually,” Alek agreed with a dreamy expression as he seemed to mentally play dress-up with Evan’s body. After a moment he blinked his eyes clear and said, “Where was I? Oh. Yeah, and most importantly, we share
whatever is on our minds. That’s a rule.”
“He threatened to make a sign for the wall and everything,” Luka told Evan behind a hand.
“I heard that,” Alek warned. “This is only going to work if we talk about anything that’s bothering us before it becomes a problem. Agreed?”
He looked at each of them in turn. Luka nodded, humming, “Mm-hmm.”
Evan muttered, “Yeah, okay.”
“No problem,” Brennan echoed.
“I mean it.”
“Okay,” Evan insisted. “So, wait, can I sleep with Luka or Brennan once in a while if I want to?”
“You have to ask Alek for permission first,” Luka answered, quite seriously, without a hint of a smile.
“You’re kidding, right?” Evan asked, laughing a little.
“No, I’m not kidding.”
Evan looked over at Alek, who had trouble holding his gaze without glancing away. He was embarrassed, Evan realized.
“What if I fall asleep on the couch next to them?”
“I’ll carry you to bed,” Alek said. “Sleeping is mine. It’s my time with you. We’ve agreed.”
“You and Luka agreed?”
“We all did,” Brennan said softly, biting at the edge of his lip. “While you were staying at Jimmy’s. We talked about ways to make sure everyone’s needs were met. You can add anything you need to, but so far these are what seemed to be the best solutions for the three of us.”
“Wow.” A hot tickle wriggled its way downward from Evan’s gut. Astonishingly, he started to get hard, thinking of Alek arguing to stake his claim in Evan during the nights. Evan shoved his hands into his pockets to hide his arousal and tried to fight a rising blush. “Yeah, okay. The sleeping thing is kind of hot. But you’re seriously okay with me having sex with them whenever I feel like it?”
“You have to let the rest of us know when it happens, if not before it happens, then soon afterward,” Luka said. “That only applies with me and Bren for you. You don’t need to tell the two of us when you’re with Alek. Alek will tell you if he’s with me or Bren. It works the other way around, too. Brennan has to tell me if he’s with you or Alek. Does that sound fair?”
“Yeah,” Evan nodded after thinking about it for a few seconds. “So… what? I call or text Alek and say, hey, we fucked?”
“You have to give some details,” Brennan said, answering for Alek who still seemed oddly quiet. “Oral, anal, handjob, whatever. I mean, you’d want to know, right?”
“Yeah, I guess I would. Wait. You guys all talked about all of this already?”
“It wasn’t the same while you were away, Ev. We argued about stuff, more than usual. We were trying to figure out the fairest way to set this all up. We all want it to work. It means a lot to each of us. It’s kind of a big deal.”
“There’s one more rule,” Alek said, speaking up again, finally. “No bondage without everyone’s permission first.”
“Huh.” Evan glanced at Brennan, who looked a little guilty. “So if you wanted to tie me up, Aleksy?”
“I have to ask Luka and Bren first. If one of them says no, it means no.”
“Spanking?”
“Spanking is fine if it’s just part of sex. If it’s punishment, that’s different. We all need to be there.”
“This all seems a little complicated. What if I forget something and break a rule?”
“Anyone breaks a rule, the other three collectively decide on repercussions.”
“You okay with all of this?” Luka asked Evan. “We know it’s a lot to take in at once.”
Surrounded by the promise of the empty apartment, his head full of new rules and responsibilities, visions of what his life would now be like, Evan considered his answer.
“Works for me,” he said, after some thought. “But, one question: Alek, does this mean you and Luka are gonna lay off each other? No more taking shit out on each other?”
“No means no,” Luka said, looking right at Alek, whose expression contorted with apology and regret. “From now on, Alek and I are going to ask for permission first, too. No assuming. No forcing. Aren’t we, Aleksy?”
“I’m sorry. I’ve said how sorry—”
Luka quieted him with a soft kiss. Alek’s hand came up, tangling it Luka’s hair, drawing it out.
Luka touched their foreheads together and said, “Me too. I’m sorry, too. We go forward, remember? No more looking back.”
“Love you, Luka,” Alek murmured, getting himself together. Evan watched attentively, trying to understand, and only began to glimpse the truth. His and Brennan’s hands folded together in silent promise to never need to apologize to one another like that, ever.
Chapter 30
Knowing You
“Look, I can’t talk right now,” Evan said. “Can I call you later?”
“Who are you talking to?”
“Nobody.”
“Nobody,” Alek echoed. “I see. Give me that. Give it.”
He snatched the phone from Evan’s hand and demanded in a very jealous-boyfriend-like way, “Who is this?”
Evan rolled his eyes, then watched the torch fires dance. They were citronella, to keep the bugs away, and ringed the blanket Alek had laid out on the grass in the same secluded meadow which had been the site of their first date. The afterimage of the golden light stayed with him as he tried to let his eyed adjust to the pitch blackness beyond their cozy circle. The woods in the distance were a dark smudge. Anything could be out there, especially at night.
“What if there are bears?” Evan wondered aloud. “I’ve heard of bears being seen in this area. Not often, but….”
“Carter, why are you calling my boyfriend when we’re on a date? Do you know how rare it is to have him all to myself? No, he’s not naked. Neither of us are naked!” Alek said loudly, looking grouchy. “It’s a date. Is this about fantasy football again? Oh my god, the two of you. He’ll call you back.”
He hung up the phone and tossed it away, into the grass.
“I’m never gonna find that now, you know,” Evan sighed. “But about the bears….”
“If a bear shows up, I’ll protect you. But there are no bears.”
“How do you know? I felt better when we were in a truck bed. I don’t think it was this dark before either. And last time we rolled around in the dirt like this, I was so banged up, Bren wanted to kick your ass around the block.” The memory made him grin, especially in retrospect.
“What happened to the Evan who didn’t care if he got hurt and was so fond of wandering off into the fields and forests to escape it all?”
“Guess I don’t want to hurt anymore, or need to escape,” he admitted. “Except from bears.”
“Doesn’t mean you can’t live a little,” Alek passed him a plastic goblet filled with a sour-smelling burgundy liquid. “Here. Drink.”
Alek was dressed in one of his work outfits, complete with loafers and tie, which made Evan, in his jeans, sneakers, and light blue sweater, feel like he was out with his babysitter instead of his boyfriend. There were some moments when the seven year age difference between them could really be felt. He’d always had a thing for older men, though, so it was a distinctly pleasant feature of their relationship in Evan’s eyes.
The stars were out and the sky clear. The Milky Way was a smudge of light streaking above their heads, from one end of the vastness of space to the other, with the trees in the distance catching a few falling stars. He couldn’t help but admit, to himself at least, that it was romantic. Bears weren’t even really a concern; the real issue for Evan would always be the ravenous beast that was the powerful sexual chemistry between them. Evan was the sole focus of Alek’s lustful attentions for a little while and no matter how much time passed, it still made Evan feel exquisitely, intoxicatingly vulnerable.
“Are you trying to poison me?” Sniffing the contents of the glass, Evan scrunched his nose mistrustfully.
“I’m trying to expose you to more cultured indulgence
s. This is wine. Merlot, specifically. Give it a try. Gulp it if you have to. Or is the innocent, virginal child act meant to turn me on?”
“Oh, I would never do something like that,” Evan managed to say with a straight face. “Though you are dressed to intimidate right now. If you look at the two of us, you’re the professor, I’m the schoolboy. And now you’re clearly trying to get me drunk, which… okay, yes, is hot.” He raised the glass to his lips and tipped it back. Once, Evan would have thought of Alek’s current demeanor as that of “new Alek,” but not now. Alek was just Alek. He had the advantage of being more mature than Evan, in many different ways. It wasn’t such a bad thing to have someone so beloved at his side, willing and able to set a good example and help show the way to begin to be an adult.
The schoolboy talk was putting some serious heat behind Alek’s hazel eyes. As Evan’s anxious anticipation skyrocketed, he tried to talk his way through the nerves and said, “You think Bren and Luka really went to the hockey game? Maybe it was just a ploy to get the apartment to themselves? Or maybe it was a cover for something bizarre like pole-dancing lessons,” Evan asked, just before downing half the glass of merlot. The taste was worse than expected. “Ugh, oh god. Awful.” He downed the rest, just to be done with it and handed the glass back to Alek. “Fuck, dude.”
“Refill?” Alek asked, smirking.
“Pass.”
“Tonight’s about us. Just us,” Alek reminded him. “Don’t worry about them.”
“What if Bren gets way too wrapped up in the game like he always does and starts arguing with some crazed fan? And you know how cuddly Luka gets. What if some homophobe sees them holding hands and follows them out to the parking lot and—“
“Babe,” Alek said tenderly at Evan’s worry. “They’ll be okay. Promise.”