by Anna Paige
"Well, no."
"Then tonight's the night we change that. You'll have a prime spot stage-side and everything. What do you say? Live a little?" It annoyed me how much he wanted her there. Why did he give a shit whether she liked our music, had been to one of our shows, or needed to relax? She wasn't his concern.
I stepped from the bus, slamming the door closed and pointedly making my presence known. She spun to look up at me as I approached, her eyes giving off my favorite tell. She looked like a deer in the headlights for a split second before she gave me her back.
That's right, pretend you're angry. I know better.
"Hey, bro. You good?" Kane asked, his eyes darting between her face and mine.
"I'm always good." I drawled. "Except when I'm bad, then I'm fucking spectacular."
Her shoulders stiffened but she didn't turn.
Kane just furrowed his brow, looking at me oddly. "You know it's too early to be drunk, right?"
"Blow me." I tossed out, staring at her back for a moment before I zeroed in on my twin. "And don't beg her to come to the concert. She knows she has the option, being that she's our keeper these days she can pretty much follow us anywhere she wants. Let her sit on the bus and stew all night. I'm sure she has a lot to think about. Isn't that right, Aubrey?"
She ignored the question entirely, placing her hand on Kane's bicep as she told him, "I'll catch the show another night, okay? But thank you for offering." She gave his arm a squeeze and walked off without so much as a single glance in my direction.
But her thighs pressed together as she made her way back to our bus.
She wasn't fooling anyone.
•••
I didn't see her again before the show began. Sound check went like shit, and we spent a good chunk of the day figuring out hiccups with the soundboard. After that was finally ironed out to everyone's satisfaction, we grabbed a bite to eat and tried to unwind before time to hit the stage. I didn't re-board the bus until almost time for the concert to start, and that was only to grab clothes. Aubrey declined to join us for dinner before the show and had apparently been locked away in the bedroom all afternoon. Not that I'd been interested enough to ask but my brother told me anyway, a hint of accusation in his eyes.
We had a quick meet-and-greet to get through before the opening acts took stage, pretty standard stuff. We smiled, took pictures, signed a few impressive sets of tits, and said our goodbyes. Afterward, I headed off to the dressing room to grab a quick shower and get in concert mode. The accommodations were pretty good here, a large dressing room that we all shared. Thick, plush couches and recliners, a fully stocked fridge with every type of beverage we could ever desire, various snacks stacked on the long catering table against the wall, and an enormous widescreen TV that would stream the show live so we could check out the opening acts while we waited for our turn.
Right then, though, all I was interested in was the huge attached bathroom. It reminded me of a high-end locker room that you'd find at some swank country club. There was a bank of four bathroom stalls with a matching row of polished sinks, and an equal number of private showers—all of which had at least half a dozen heads and were five times the size of the one on our bus. There was even a small steam room in the back.
Technically, I could have showered on the bus, but why would I do that when I had all this?
Not to mention, this way I wouldn't have to deal with Aubrey.
As fun as our little game of cat and mouse was, I didn't want it to throw me off when it came to my work. I couldn't go on stage with her in my head. I needed to be fully focused on the audience and the music. I may have been a troublemaker as far as the world was concerned, but I was also a goddamn professional, and this music, our music, was my life.
Her, I would deal with later.
•••
When I finished my shower, I found the rest of the guys lounging around the dressing room, checking out the opening act—Eleven of Diamonds—and gearing up for our turn. There would be another band after EoD—All the Rage—so we had plenty of time to kill. As always, Ethan was hydrating like a madman, chugging one bottle of water after another—knowing he would sweat it all out behind his drum kit.
Lennox was sampling everything on the food table, nodding in approval at some of the stuff, frowning and throwing out others. He was a bit of a food snob, which was funny, given that I’d seen him live on mayonnaise sandwiches for a week back in school—by choice.
Jared was quietly going over printed lyrics that matched tonight's set list, part of his process.
And Kane was watching the opening act with rapt attention, always perking up when the lead guitarist was on screen. He liked to check out everyone's techniques, comparing them to his own. Not that he was looking to feel superior—quite the opposite. He was fascinated by other guitarists and felt that there was something to be learned from everyone. He believed that being a headliner wasn't an endorsement of our band over anyone else's. It was just luck of the draw.
After nine albums and hundreds of shows, I tended to agree. There was so much talent out there. We'd all be fools not to learn from each other.
I took a seat beside my brother on the couch, snagging his full beer right out of his hand and taking a long swallow. "He's good." I told him, nodding to the EoD's lead guitarist, Nate.
"Damn right he is. That fret board is practically smoking." He snatched his beer back, shaking his head. "Get your own beer, asshole."
"Stingy bitch." I flipped him off, and smiled, slipping momentarily back into our usual banter. I missed that more than I cared to admit.
Pretending to be unaffected by my momentary stroll down memory lane, I shot Jared a pleading look. He was sitting closest to the fridge.
He silently reached over and snagged two beers, taking one for himself and handing the other over to me before returning his attention to the rumpled pages in front of him. He carried those lyrics to each show, and they were looking a little worn. I decided to ask Aubrey if she could print him out a new set. I'd seen her wireless printer on the dresser earlier that morning when she'd briefly left the bedroom door open.
Why'd I have to think about her right now? Dammit.
Apparently, I wasn't the only one who had her on their mind. Kane kept his eyes on the TV as he asked, "So, what happened earlier with you and Aubrey? Did you actually listen to her or are you still committed to being a dick?"
"I managed to both hear her out and still be a dick," I snorted, tossing a bottle cap at the side of his head. "See? I told you I was good."
He wasn’t interested in joking around. "You should ease up on her, Kade. She's not as bad as you're making her out to be. Yeah, she started off a little rough, but you can't really blame her. This," he gestured around the room. "Isn't exactly what she's used to, but she's trying. Everybody can see that except you."
"You're all seeing what you want to see. I'm the only one who's seeing what actually is."
"And what's that?" He looked at me expectantly, angrily. "You think she's the enemy, right? Some pencil pusher sent here to tell us who we are and make us toe the company line in the name of saving our contract?"
"So you do see the truth, and you're choosing to ignore it?" I accused, narrowing my eyes at him.
"No, I just know you well enough to know that's what you want to see. You want her to be the enemy because that way you have something to protect us all from. Because if she's really here to cover our asses, she's putting you right out of a job." He glared right back. "Face it, you resent her because she might just be able to fix something you can't."
"You're out of your damn mind," I ground out, jaw tense and hands clenched.
"We were born eight minutes apart but I've always been your little brother, and you made it your life's work to have my back." He looked around the suddenly still room, and I realized they were all watching and nodding along with my brother. "When we started this band, you became the big brother to them, too. We're grateful for it,
we really are, but it's not your job to fix everything. This shit storm we're going through right now? You stepped up and took the heat for me without even asking if I wanted you to."
He was gonna make me choke his dumb ass again, wasn't he? "They named me, stupid. Those two girls thought you were me because you told them that's who you were. My name was already out there. Would it have done any good to argue the point? People believe what they want to believe. The headline was already plastered over every media outlet on the planet. Kade Edenfield photographed in bed with two underage girls. Never mind that it wasn't me and they weren't underage—the damage was done. No amount of denial was going to erase it, so why bother?"
"The truth came out about their ages and people listened. Why would admitting it was me be any different?" He looked at me like I was dense.
I leveled a stare at him, trying to fathom his level of naïveté. "Because of the assault charge in St. Louis. Because my name had already been all over the news this year. Because they expected it from me. Because I'm the 'troubled' twin and you're fucking golden. What's the point of sinking us both?"
"I think we should tell Aubrey the truth."
I jumped to my feet and sent my beer crashing against the wall, suds and glass flying everywhere. "I'll be goddamned! You keep your stupid yap shut and let it go down the way it has to go down or so help me God I will kick the ever-loving shit out of you."
He met my stance, toe to toe and just as angry. "Why are you so hell bent on going down for this?"
"Because I'm expendable, you stupid jackass," I roared so loud my chest shook. "If they decide we're more trouble than we're worth, I can offer to walk away, and you can all still have a future. If both of us are tainted by scandal, they'll cut the band outright, but you guys can survive without me. Your voice is just as good as mine, Kane. You can lead this band."
"Not. Fucking. Happening," he bit out. "We're all in or we're all out. Period."
"Fuckin' A!" Lennox agreed.
"Yup," Ethan added.
Only Jared reserved comment, but I could tell from the look on his face that he agreed. One thing about Jared, he rarely spoke when angry, but you could damn sure read it on his face. So, while his silence wasn’t unusual, that look was all the confirmation I needed that he was pissed. They all were. But they were wrong.
"You're all being stupid." I dismissed their moment of solidarity with a shrug. "I meant what I said; I expect you to keep your mouths shut around Aubrey. It's already done. And it's not your truth to tell."
"Not even mine?" Kane asked, still angry.
"Nope. Your part in it is over. It's my story to tell now, and I'm not talking about it anymore. It is what it is, and I'll deal with it one way or another. And you four," I stared them all down, "will do what's right for the band, for the music, and for the fans. That means keeping ToTC going with or without me."
Murmurs of protest started the moment I finished, but I wasn't listening. I grabbed a fresh beer and walked out the door, leaving them to be pissed at me all they wanted.
•••
Twenty minutes and two laps around the long hallways later, I'd calmed down enough to refocus on the show. The second act had just started their set; I could hear the crowd cheering their arrival. It would be time for us to take the stage in less than an hour, and I was determinedly making my way in that direction, eager to get under the lights and use the music to chase away the residual shit I was still trying to shake off.
The guys just didn’t understand; they didn’t see my logic yet, but they would. If it came down to it, they’d fucking have to.
I turned a corner, still a ways from the stage entrance and dressing rooms, muttering hellos to a few sound techs milling in the hall, when I spotted her. Aubrey was wearing a pair of form-fitting black dress pants, silver heels, and a pale blue silk top that made her look both hot as hell and totally out of place backstage at a rock concert. She looked remarkably like a hot librarian. Really hot. She was talking animatedly to one of the security guards working the show, looking panicked.
I'd just started in that direction when the guard's hand shot out and gripped her upper arm, hard. Hard enough that I heard her yelp from the other end of the hall. She was trying to twist out of his grip as he began practically dragging her in the other direction, all the while she kept repeating, "Let go, you're hurting me!"
My heart hammered in my chest as I closed the distance between us. "Hey!" I yelled, my gruff voice echoing off the stark cinder block walls.
He halted, spinning to face me and dragging her around in an arc beside him, his grip never letting up. A split second passed before a look of recognition flashed across his face. "Mr. Edenfield?" He looked genuinely confused. "What can I do for—"
"You can let her the fuck go before I break your arm off and shove it up your ass." I kept closing in, set on doing just that.
He jerked his hand from her flesh as if burned. "I didn't realize she was…"
I poked him in the center of his chest, backing him up a step as I watched Aubrey rub her arm from the corner of my eye. "You didn't realize she was what? A fucking human being? A woman who you outweigh by over a hundred pounds?" I turned to look at the reddened outline of his hand on her arm, reaching up and snatching him around by the back of the neck, forcing him to look down at what he'd done. "Explain to me under what circumstance this is okay, because I can't think of any."
I let go of him and reached out to offer Aubrey my hand, guiding her to stand behind me. She did so without argument, still looking afraid and not in the way that turned us both on.
The guard, who conveniently had no name tag, put his hands up in apology, looking repentant but only because he was scared of getting his ass kicked. I was a few inches taller but he was solid—built—but that wouldn’t stop me from tearing him apart. It seemed he was only aggressive when he had the clear advantage, though. "I'm so sorry, Mr. Edenfield. She didn't have a pass, and she kept asking to see a member of the band. I thought she was a crazed fan or something. I was only trying to do my job."
"You don't have a job anymore. Consider yourself officially fired." I nodded to the radio on his belt. "Call your supervisor down here so he or she can escort you out. For your own protection. Because if I see your face again, I'm bashing it in." I turned to Aubrey, giving her a quick once over. "Unless, of course, you'd like to press assault charges."
She shook her head, looking away. She was hurt and embarrassed, which only enraged me further.
I turned back to him and listened as he rattled off his location over the radio. "I'll be checking in to see that you're gone. For your sake, you better be." I got in his face one last time, still not content to let it go. "I kinda hope you're still around after the show though, because if that's the way you treat women in public, I can only imagine how you are behind closed doors. I can't even begin to tell you how much joy I'd get from breaking you down like the pussy you are." He flinched back at the look on my face but said nothing.
Aubrey moved in behind me, reaching for my hand. "Kade? Can we go now, please? I just want to go back to the bus."
I folded my fingers between hers and stepped around the newly unemployed guard, keeping my pace slow to accommodate her shorter stride. I walked her past everyone with barely a glance at their curious faces. When Kane stepped out of the dressing room ahead of us, I didn't even slow or acknowledge his questioning look.
I didn't stop until I got to the bus and then it was only to allow her to board ahead of me. She barely made it two steps before turning and collapsing on one of the couches, her head falling into her hands, shoulders heaving with heavy breaths as she finally reacted to what had happened. I just stood there awkwardly, not knowing what to do. After a minute, I stepped closer and ran my hand over her hair, wishing she would say something or at least look at me so I could see that she really was okay.
Almost as if she heard me, she looked up, craning her neck to meet my gaze.
The tears streaming
down her face gutted me. They dripped onto the floor like tiny drops of acid burning straight through my heart. She was shaking like a damn leaf.
Instinctively, I reached out for her, grateful when she didn't shy away as I took a seat next to her on the couch and pulled her into my side. "Shh," I muttered over her broken sobs, gently running my hand up and down her injured arm, trying to chase away the memory of his hands on her tender flesh. "I've got you. You're okay now."
All my assurances did was make her cry that much harder, so I stopped talking and just held her, letting her tears soak through my shirt.
"Hey, what happened?" My brother stepped onto the bus, and Aubrey instantly buried her tear streaked face in my chest, hiding. He looked from her to me, concerned. "Is she all right? What the hell?"
I began rubbing my hand over her hair, letting her wrap her arms around my waist as I did. "She's gonna be fine. Some guard manhandled her because she didn't have a pass."
Kane's expression turned murderous. "He what? Who? Where the fuck is he now?" He shifted on his feet, looking antsy, needing to do something but not knowing what to do. I knew the feeling well.
"The unemployment line is my best guess. Unless he's as stupid as he looks and decides to hang around, then he'll be at the local ER by morning. I can damn well promise you that."
Kane came closer, and his eyes locked on Aubrey's upper arm, which was on full display now that she was turned into me, burrowed into my chest. He bent down a little to get a better look, his face filling with pure rage for a moment before he stood and headed toward the kitchen. "She needs an ice pack," he muttered to no one in particular, clearly just thankful to be doing something.
"Yeah, good idea," I told him, leaning down to rest my cheek on the top of her head, whispering so only she could hear. "You hear that, warden? Kane's gonna get you fixed right up." I didn't expect her to respond to my snarky nickname for her but it was worth a try.
My brother returned with a kitchen towel full of ice, handing it to me and stepping back to watch us. "You want me to stick around a little while? I can rustle her up some dinner. She didn't eat earlier."