by Kristen Cobb
Nessa absolutely refused to turn around and look at Conri. That would only cause her to loose the tenuous control she currently had on her emotions. “We should head to Marta’s.” Nessa walked away from Glenna and Etain without answering the question, knowing they would follow. She refused to tell them her secret before Conri. He deserved to hear the truth from her, not someone else. That was a risk she would not take.
Etain caught up to her before Glenna. “I take that to mean you do not wish to talk about it.”
Nessa considered ignoring the comment altogether, deciding to be honest instead. “Actually I would love to talk about it but Conri needs to hear it from me first.”
Glenna caught up to them, her much shorter legs having to work extra hard to keep up. “Could you please slow down? What are you so upset about anyway? Is the wedding off?” Glenna was obviously joking but when no answer seemed forthcoming her entire demeanor changed. Glenna stepped in front of her. “Stop right there and tell us what is going on. Whatever it is we can fix it. He loves you and I know you love him.” When she still refused to reply Glenna continued on undeterred. “Unless you have finally decided not to marry an outcast. Is that it? I thought you…”
“Of course not. It is you people that are concerned with such things. Conri is perfect exactly as he is.” Nessa sighed when Glenna and Etain continued to stand there watching her intently. There seemed very little chance they would give up until she gave them some indication as to what was bothering her. “I have something to tell him later and it might change the way he feels about me.”
“What could possibly be so bad that he would stop loving you? From what I hear my son has never paid even the slightest bit of attention to a woman before you came along.” The happiness returned to Etain’s eyes. “You are just nervous.”
Nessa decided to use that opening to change the subject. Anything to get off this particular topic of conversation. “Did you ever get married?”
Etain looked away, slowly walking toward the drawbridge. “No.”
Nessa followed beside Etain, matching her ambling gait. “Because you are still in love with Conri’s father?” A bold question but one that needed to be asked. Etain was clearly devoted to Kaelan in her heart but too afraid to do anything about it.
Etain continued walking, looking straight ahead. Her answer, when finally given, barely audible. “Yes.”
Nessa heard everything implied by that one word. Etain had been denying herself the man she loved for over a century. Her life very likely stopped the day she walked away from him. “Then why are you not with him?”
“She would never be welcomed back to Knocknashee.” Glenna sounded shocked by the mere suggestion that Etain should choose to be with an outcast.
“My father was wrong Glenna. The outcasts are not the enemy. I have wasted so much of my life believing his lies.” The sadness in Etain’s eyes ran deep, regret weighing heavily.
Nessa laid a hand on Etain’s arm. “Why not go to him?”
“He would never be able to forgive what I have done.”
“You will never know until you try.” Nessa decided to take her own advice. She would fight for Conri if necessary, prove how much she loved him. He was worth it. That thought lightened her mood considerably.
Rory closed the door behind them. Two guards were posted outside the chamber with two more at the entrance to the tower. This entire tower was set aside for Rory’s personal use.
Conri had yet to say anything at all. He apparently realized her request for this private meeting with Rory did not bode well. She could tell by the way he avoided looking directly at her.
Taking a deep breath would not be enough to fortify her courage. Looking around the chamber Nessa realized this was some sort of private meeting room. There were four large high-backed chairs upholstered with a red fabric, two on each side of the chamber, with a fairly large end table set between each pair of chairs. Two candles burned on each table.
Rory sat down in one of the chairs, stretching his legs out in front of him. He motioned to the chairs across from him. “Please, sit down. Conri tells me you requested a private meeting.”
Nessa considered refusing but then decided this might go a bit better if she were sitting. She needed to convince them she no longer posed a threat. Standing might appear more aggressive, as if she were ready to attack. Reluctantly she sat down in one of the chairs across from Rory. All of the nervous energy made her want to pace back and forth.
Conri lifted his sword and sheath over his head. After leaning it against the arm of the chair next to Rory’s he sat down. It all felt very formal.
Taking that deep breath she did not think would help Nessa decided to jump right in. “I was sent here to kill Rory.”
Conri’s entire body tensed, hands tightly gripping the curved wooden arms of the chair.
“Apparently you have changed your mind.” In complete contrast Rory appeared totally relaxed. He did not seem threatened by her at all. More likely he simply trusted Conri to protect him, even if it meant killing her. The bond between them obviously ran deep.
Nessa decided to focus on Rory as she spoke rather than Conri. His nonchalance helped her feel more relaxed. “You may thank Conri for that. Your death would cost me his love. It is too high a price to pay.”
“It would not be the first time he has saved my life.” Rory turned and looked at Conri. “I owe him a great deal. More than can ever be repaid.”
“You owe me nothing.” Conri’s gaze remained focused solely on her. His voice held no clue as to his emotions. “My wife however owes me an explanation.”
Nessa could not help but look at Conri since he was sitting across from her. A situation he undoubtedly anticipated. Had he always known this moment would come? He did not appear angry although it could be difficult to tell at times. He sat up straight in the chair rather than leaning lazily against the rounded back, his posture anything but relaxed.
She actually felt a good deal of relief confessing her last secret. “I have been seeing a vision of Conor’s execution since the day he was born. It is always the same. Conor is about the same age he is right now. Kneeling on a wooden platform his head rests on a blood soaked wooden block. Then the executioner’s ax comes down to slice off his head.” She could see it so clearly in her mind. Now she knew it would play out. She squandered her one and only chance to affect the outcome by falling in love with Conri.
“You see the future?” Conri did not sound unduly surprised. After learning she had control over the world around her and the ability to change into any creature apparently seeing the future provided no great surprise.
“Sometimes the trees warn me of things that have not yet occurred. Ever since Dermot signed the treaty with Rory, giving Conor as a hostage, the trees have been wailing day and night. They mourn the death of the man who would be their greatest king. The only man who can save the people of Ireland.”
“Save them from what?” Conri’s brow furrowed in confusion as he leaned forward in the chair, listening intently.
“I have no idea. The visions are not always easy to interpret. Other times it is not a vision at all, more a general knowledge. I told Dermot of my vision, begged him not to give Conor as a hostage. Obviously he refused to listen.” Dermot had been quite dismissive of her concerns, as if she were being silly and overemotional.
“How long have the two of you been planning this?” Conri’s jaw clenched as he said the words.
“I have no idea how long he has been planning it. The day before I met you Dermot called me into his tent and laid out his plan. He said it was the only way to save Conor. I suggested he honor the treaty but he refused to even consider it. According to Dermot, Rory is unfit to be king of all Ireland.” Nessa could feel her anger at Dermot simmering just below the surface, the man causing all of this pain.
“What exactly was the plan?” No real emotion could be discerned on Conri’s face. Even his eyes were a study in neutrality.
&nb
sp; “He wanted me to exploit Rory’s one true weakness, women. I was supposed to seduce him in order to remain close. As soon as I hear that Dermot has raided into Connaught I am to kill Rory then go meet Dermot and his army northeast of here. Once I have confirmed that Rory is dead Dermot will attack the castle and free Conor.” There, that was everything, every last secret. Whether Conri would be able to forgive her remained another story entirely. Watching him closely she still had no idea how their future would play out.
“Did Conor know about this plan?” Conri looked directly into her eyes, searching for any sign that she was lying.
Nessa could feel her eyes open wide, surprised by his question. She never even considered that he might think Conor complicit. “No. Conor never would have approved, even to save his own life.”
Conri grabbed his sword and stood up. Nessa watched him lift the strap over his head, quickly adjusting the weapon across his upper body. That done he turned toward the door without saying a word.
“Please do not tell Conor about my vision. I would rather not ruin what is left of his life.” Nessa nearly held her breath waiting for Conri to answer or turn around.
He stopped for what could barely be considered a moment then continued out the door without even glancing back at her.
Nessa watched the door after he left, wanting desperately to go after him and talk it out. He claimed when they had a problem the best thing to do was keep talking, not run away. Unfortunately she could not leave yet. Conor’s life remained in serious jeopardy. This would be her best chance to negotiate with Rory.
“Let him go. Everything will be fine.” Rory sounded utterly unruffled.
Nessa pulled her eyes away from the door, hoping Rory was right. “He might never trust me again.”
“It really is truly amazing. Even the most intelligent women somehow lose their ability to think when he is involved.” Rory shook his head as if utterly disappointed in her.
“Excuse me.” She had quite honestly never been so insulted.
“He left you alone with me. Do you honestly think he would have done that if he did not trust you?” Rory tilted his head and sighed, as if slightly frustrated at having to lead her to that quite obvious fact.
Realizing his assessment of the situation made perfect sense she almost smiled. When it came to Conri emotion seemed to take over, the possibility of never being able to touch him again devastating. She could feel her entire body relax as an immense sense of relief washed over her. Conri might be a tad angry but deep down he still trusted her, which meant he still loved her.
“Telling him the truth now was a smart move but it could not have been easy. I know Dermot has been like a father to you.” The sympathy in Rory’s eyes seemed genuine. He understood the consequences of her confession.
There would be no better time than the present to try and convince Rory to spare Conor. Once Dermot raided into Connaught Rory would be furious. He just proved how drastically emotion could affect your ability to think clearly. If she waited until the situation became dire there might be no reasoning with him. “My concern for Conor was the only reason I agreed to assist Dermot in this heinous plan. Dermot has already violated the treaty by taking Dublin. He will continue to push until you push back. You could have ended it at Dublin. Your numbers far exceeded his. Why did you leave?” Nessa watched every nuance of his reaction to her question, intensely curious about his motivation in making that particular decision.
Rory turned away, staring off into the distance as if his mind were suddenly somewhere else. Just when she began to fear he would refuse to answer he finally spoke. “I have no love for battle. If I can save the lives of a thousand men by killing one that is the choice I will make.” Rory’s eyes held a surprising amount of sorrow when his gaze finally met hers again. “Your vision sounds like something I would do.”
No amount of begging on her part would convince him to spare Conor. His moral reasoning was sound. How could she ethically argue for battle after what he just said yet that was exactly what needed to be done? “This is Dermot’s last chance. No one in Ireland will support him. He was forced to hire foreign mercenaries to fight for him. If you crush him now he will not be able to mount another offensive against you. A show of force will also deter anyone else from challenging you.”
The sadness in Rory’s eyes as he looked at her killed any hope she might have been harboring. It did not appear as if he were even considering her argument. “I have not faired well in battle.”
Nessa took a moment to let those words sink in. A king afraid to lead his army into battle. The very thought sent a wave of terror coursing through her body. War was the only way to maintain power and control in Ireland. She tried to recall what she knew of Rory’s rise to power.
Rory’s father had been the king of Connaught as well as high-king of Ireland. Upon his death Rory became king of Connaught but the high-kingship of Ireland was not so easily attained. A battle for the high-kingship ensued between Muircertach MacLochlainn and Rory. Dermot sided with MacLochlainn. She remembered the battle well. It was her first. She sent a silent thanks to Laurence’s God that she and Conri did not meet on the battlefield that day.
They nearly decimated Rory’s army. The battle had been a decisive win for MacLochlainn and Rory slunk away with his tail between his legs like a defeated pup. MacLochlainn remained high-king until his death some years later.
Upon MacLochlainn’s death Rory ascended to the role of high-king without even a single battle. Rory had not entered into a major battle since the one with MacLochlainn. Smaller skirmishes were easily won with the number of warriors he could assemble as high-king. Rory’s fear of entering into a major battle and losing was the reason he agreed to a treaty with a man known for breaking them. Suddenly it all made sense. The problem now being what to do about it.
Rory needed confidence. There was only one thing she could think to do. Likely a long shot but worth trying. Her loyalty always gave Dermot added confidence. Dermot felt as if he had the powers of the fairy folk on his side. He considered her to be an orphaned descendent of the mythical creatures, sent to him as a sign that he would be a great and powerful king. Perhaps she could do the same for Rory. In the end confidence was all a matter of perception.
Nessa allowed the earth’s energy to flow into her body. Using her hand to direct it at Rory she wound the silvery strands of power around the dagger at his waist. Pulling her arm back quickly the dagger flew from its sheath into her hand, carried to her by the wispy strands of glittering energy.
Rory’s eyes opened wide as he sat up straight, moving to the edge of his chair. He looked down at the empty sheath attached to his belt then up at the dagger in her hand. “How did you do that?”
Nessa set his dagger on the table next to her chair. “I can collect energy from all around me and use it to do things. I can increase my strength in battle to surpass that of any man, move things with the flick of a wrist. I can even heal a fatal wound. The mare you saw Conri riding was actually me. I can turn into any creature I want.” The stunned expression on Rory’s face almost made her smile.
“Show me.” Rory’s eyes were focused on her so intently it appeared as if he were trying not to blink, afraid he would miss something.
Nessa slipped off her boots, setting them on the floor next to the chair. It felt a bit disconcerting to have Rory watching as she removed her shirt and hung it over the arm of the chair. Standing up she pulled off her pants, laying them over the shirt. Moving to the center of the room she turned into a raven. The small chamber did not provide enough space for her to fly so she simply stood there for a bit, allowing Rory time to truly believe what his eyes were seeing. He actually bent forward, staring at her in wonder.
Turning back into human form she quickly dressed. Rory still sat on the edge of the chair, staring in stunned silence. Nessa grabbed Rory’s dagger from the table next to her chair and walked across the wooden floor of the small chamber. Setting the weapon on the table next
to him she fell to her knees at his feet. “You have my loyalty with everything that entails. I can be a powerful ally. I will fight an entire army alone for you if I must. There is only one thing I ask in return. Do not kill Conor.”
They looked into each other’s eyes without saying another word. She did not expect Rory to answer or provide any promises. Neither of them could know what his decision would be until the moment came to pass. A bond existed between them now. He knew her secret. With great reluctance she stood and quietly exited the room, leaving Rory to his thoughts.
Sitting in the great hall as dinner was being served Nessa glanced around the room one more time. Conri had yet to make an appearance since her confession. It felt as if he were avoiding her. Rory was seated to her right, so close their legs were touching. Oddly enough his presence provided a great deal of comfort. Rory’s four guards stood silently behind them. Will was seated to her left with Conor next to him and Donal on the end. Etain and Glenna were seated across from her with Sedric and Allister flanking them on either side. There seemed to be very little chatter at their table tonight. She warned them all there might not be a wedding although no one besides Rory knew why. Now everyone sat quietly, afraid to broach the topic even though they were undoubtedly curious.
Rory leaned in close, whispering in her ear. “I will be right back. I have a surprise that I think might cheer you up.” Stepping over the bench Rory headed toward the archway that led to the hallway connecting his tower to Conri’s. The four guards followed dutifully behind their king.
Nessa watched Rory until he disappeared into the hallway, headed toward his tower.
Will slid over into Rory’s spot. “What are you doing? I thought you were in love with Conri.” What may have been meant as a whisper came out more as an angry hiss.
“I am in love with Conri. Why would you say that?” Nessa did not even pretend to whisper or hide her annoyance at whatever his comment implied.