The ladies were laughing hard when I looked back at them, hoping desperation didn’t show on my face. “Would you mind helping me out here?” I asked, wishing one of them would shift their arse and take this thing from me.
“But you are doing such a fine job,” Amber tittered.
“Does this sound like I’m doing a fine job?” I grumbled, irritated and with a headache brewing.
Marika laughed and shook her head, and then walked across the room to take the baby from me. Giana immediately stopped crying and I sighed in relief.
“You know Craig, all she needed was a bit of a cuddle,” Marika smirked.
“I was cuddling her, she still wouldn’t shut up.”
Amber strolled over and stroked a hand over Giana’s head. “You were not cuddling her, Craig. You were jostling her around like she was in a speeding dune buggy.”
“No I wasn’t.” Was I?
She faced me and put her palm to my chest, immediately snapping me out of my irritation. “You were, babe. But she’s okay, no harm done.” I looked over to the baby and noticed she was now smiling at me, blabbering some baby gibberish. She was no doubt telling me what a dick I was.
“Her nappy's wet, I’d better go and change her. Will you guys excuse me for a minute?” Marika left the room with Giana and I sat back on the sofa. Holy shit! Was that what having a baby was like? We’d only been there an hour or so and from what I could tell, all babies did was cry, eat and mess up their nappies.
Trying to keep Giana quiet whilst Amber was off with Marika had been a feat in itself. It was akin to trying to keep two warring countries from launching a full scale attack when they had gone way beyond negotiation. It was… difficult. She was a cute baby and all but how someone had the patience and energy to deal with that all day long, I would never know. It made me realise how grateful I was that Amber and I had decided to wait a while. After that little introduction, I thought I might just extend that for a while longer. I didn’t want an overly demanding baby exhausting Amber and taking her away from me.
“What are you thinking?” Amber asked as she sat beside me on the sofa.
“I had no idea babies would be so demanding and tiring. Jesus Christ, she kept me on my toes for something so little.” I shook my head at the recollections of the idiotic faces I tried pulling, the raspberries I blew on her cheek, and the improvised instrument I’d tried to make with my car keys. But yet nothing would work. Eventually, when I collapsed on the sofa, out of ideas, she had quietened down and we must have both fallen asleep. Before I knew it I was being woken from my peaceful nap by the two women chatting.
“Looks like you did a good job with her. She likes you.”
“I don’t know about that,” I grumbled. “Babies and me, we don’t get along.” Amber's brow furrowed but she didn’t say anything.
After a few minutes, Marika returned to the room with a babbling Giana and placed her on the floor with some farm animal shapes. I couldn’t believe I hadn’t seen the toys earlier. It would have saved me so much stress. “Would you guys like to stay for dinner?” Marika asked.
“No,” I quickly replied awarding me an annoyed glare from Amber. I’d had enough baby banter for one day; I didn’t think I could manage to eat a meal with it too. “Um, I mean, thanks, that’s kind of you to ask, but we have plans.”
Amber’s eyebrows shot up. “We do?”
“Yeah, we do. I thought we could go to Giovanni’s later.” Giovanni’s was the restaurant I had taken Amber to for our first date. I just prayed I could try and wangle a last minute table. The twinkle in her eyes told me that regardless of the reasons behind my decision, it was a good one. Since that first date we’d only been back there a few times, but each time we did Amber seemed to remember those precious first date memories. It reaffirmed to her how far we had come, both personally and as a couple.
“That’s a shame,” Marika said and I saw the sadness return to her eyes. Of course she was sad; her whole world had just been tipped upside down. She no doubt didn’t want to be alone.
“We’ll get together soon,” Amber told her with that adorable smile on her face that got me every time.
I listened to the ladies babble on for a while longer about fuck knows what, and then excused myself. I had a phone call to a restaurant to make. Deciding the safest place to make the call so Amber didn’t overhear was outside, I headed in that direction.
As I went to pull the phone out of my pocket it began to ring. The caller display showed number withheld and when I answered the line went dead. I searched my memory bank for any important calls I might have been expecting but couldn’t think of anything. Putting it down to a misdial, or one of those annoying automated sales calls, I pulled up my contacts and found the number for Giovanni’s. Five minutes later I was walking back into the house having secured a table for later that evening.
In the living room the two ladies were still talking. It lightened my heart a little to know that despite the sad circumstances for us being there, Amber seemed to be getting on well with Marika. They both appeared to be a unified strength for the other, and Amber needed that right then.
“Are you ready to go, Pingu? I need to get some work done before we go out tonight.”
“Pingu?” Marika asked Amber with a smirk.
“I’ll explain another time,” Amber replied with a giggle. Stepping over toys to get to Giana, Amber picked the baby up with a huge smile. “And you little missy, you behave for mummy, okay?” She gave her a kiss on the nose and then hugged her against her chest.
Watching Amber with a baby like that caused some weird feeling to surface in my chest. It felt like I was fighting some invisible pull to something, but I didn’t know what it was. She looked so beautiful, so at ease, so… content. When she laughed at something Giana did, I felt like I’d been kicked in the gut by a wild Mustang. The reverberations from the impact travelled through my body and ended in my heart.
We walked out to the car after saying our goodbyes and as we stopped next to the passenger door I reached out to open it, and then stopped myself. “You know how much, right?” I asked keeping my eyes trained on the car door.
“Know how much what?” she asked, confused.
I looked into her beautiful hazel eyes. Her hair was fluttering in the breeze and covering the side of her face so I swept it out of the way and softly trailed my fingers down her cheek, resting my palm there. “How perfect you are, how much I love you. With everything going on at the moment, I don’t feel that I’m telling you enough.”
She leaned into my touch and closed her eyes, inhaling deeply. “I love you too.”
“Forever and always.” With my fingers I tilted her head up and dipped forward to skate my lips across hers. “No matter what,” I kissed her again. “I will always,” another kiss, “be here for you.” I ended by pressing my lips harder against hers, showing her how connected we were, and that I was her life force to lean on.
When I eased back she still had her eyes closed and a smile on her face. If only that was all it took to permanently wipe away her sadness.
I opened the door, threw the bag with James’s clothes in the back and helped Amber climb in. As she was buckling up my phone rang in my pocket again but I ignored it.
“Are you not going to answer that?”
“It’s probably just some pain in the arse call centre trying to sell me shit. They can wait,” I smiled at her and closed the door. I wanted to get my baby home.
CHAPTER TEN
Amber
Giovanni’s was a vibrant Italian restaurant in the heart of the town centre. Because it was well known for its delicious food, excellent service and comfortable surroundings, the place was packed and loud as we stepped through the front entrance. We were immediately greeted by Maria, the hostess, and escorted to a small table near the rear of the restaurant. Back there, we were away from the louder, larger tables and could easily engage in a reasonable conversation without having to shout at each other.
Maria handed us each a menu and informed us that our waiter would be with us shortly. Then with a polite smile she left us to return to the hostess stand. I liked Maria. The few times we’d been there, including our first ever date; she had always been friendly, efficient and respectful that Craig was with someone. It got old and irritating when, wherever we went, females would fawn over Craig, practically throwing themselves at him. I swore that one day I wouldn’t be able to bite my tongue any longer and I would give these shameless harlots a piece of my mind.
“What would you like?” Craig asked as I looked over the menu. I was usually quick at making my choices, knowing what I liked and what I fancied whenever we ate out. That day, though, or more specifically since James’s death, I didn’t seem to have an appetite for anything. My stomach seemed to be in perpetual knots, causing all sorts of nausea and nervousness, from my guilt ridden subconscious.
“I can’t decide. Why don’t you order for me? Nothing heavy though, I’m not that hungry,” I replied and looked around at the comings and goings of the happy diners around us. I knew Craig was watching me, I could feel his eyes boring into me. He was wondering when I was going to pull myself out of this hole I’d flung myself into. The simple answer to that was, I didn’t know.
“Amber, you’ve hardly eaten anything in the past four days. You need to eat.” His calm, condescending tone pissed me off so I snapped my head around to glare at him.
“Don’t you think I know that? Don’t you think I would rather be anywhere but under this dark cloud at the moment? But I’m not, Craig, I’m not.” I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, trying to calm myself down. Damn it! Why was I constantly getting annoyed with him? When I reopened my eyes I felt calmer. “I’m sorry,” I murmured.
“Stop apologising for feeling the way you do. You’re going through a rough time and I get it, grief is an awful thing. But I’m worried about you.” He reached over and held my hand in his, stroking his thumb across my knuckles in a soothing caress.
As I stared into Craig’s eyes, losing myself in his powerful gaze, I sensed someone move up beside us, and then a throat was being cleared. Our moment of togetherness was broken and Craig pulled his hand from mine, leaving me feeling cold and bereft once again.
“Buonasera. My name is Marco, I will be your waiter for the evening. Can I get you something to drink?” After being greeted by Marco, Craig ordered our food and drinks while I continued to look around the restaurant. I thought about how many diners in the room had been through difficult times recently. “I’ll be right back with your drinks.” The deep Italian accent of Marco pulled my attention back to our table, and to Craig.
“I ordered your favourite,” he said, reaching over to take my hand again. I decided to try and forget things, at least for the night, and enjoy that time with Craig. He was trying hard to help me through and I owed it to him to try too. “I didn’t tell you, but you look beautiful tonight.”
“You always say that.” My cheeks heated, embarrassed by his compliment and I looked away. Even after eight months and all we’d shared and promised for the future, I still found it hard to believe that Craig saw me that way.
“Hey, I say it because I mean it. Look at me, Ambs.” I returned my gaze to his, watching as his deep green eyes sparkled with sincerity. “I say it because you are the most beautiful woman I have ever met, inside and out. I thank my lucky stars each and every day that you never gave up on me and that you never gave up on us.”
“Craig?” We both peered up at the same time and looked into the face of Jenny, the receptionist from Craig’s offices. “I thought it was you over here.”
Craig’s hand tightened on mine. “Jenny. What are you doing here?”
“Oh, you know, meal out with friends.” She gestured toward one of the larger tables near the front of the restaurant, from where most of the noise was coming from. “And you?”
Craig’s eyes narrowed, still pinned on Jenny. “Trying to have a quiet meal with my fiancée.”
“Oh, so this is the one huh?” Jenny still had her eyes fixed on Craig.
“Yes, this is Amber,” he growled. “But you already know that because you’ve met her before.”
Finally Jenny looked over at me with an insincere smile. “Oh yes, that’s right, you’ve been to the office a few times. Nice to see you again.” The slight curl of her lip before she looked back at Craig didn’t go unnoticed. “I guess I should get back to my friends. I just popped over to say hi. I’ll see you on Monday, Craig. I’ll pop up and see you again.”
She backed away from the table, keeping her eyes on Craig. She then turned and sauntered back toward her table, swaying her hips in an overly dramatic fashion.
“What was that all about? Is she always that bitchy? You know you really need to get rid of her. She is the most unprofessional person I’ve ever met… Craig?”
“What? Sorry, Pingu, what did you say?” Craig shook his head as if to clear his thoughts and lifted his eyes to mine.
“I said you should get rid of her. She is so unprofessional, Craig. It isn’t good for business.”
“I wish it were that easy,” he said with a sigh. “Until she does something major all we can do is warn her about her conduct. She’d sue our arses if we tried to just give her the chop.”
“What did she mean when she said she’ll pop by and see you again? Does she do that often?” He visibly stiffened and pulled his hand from mine to grab the bottle of beer that had been placed in front of him.
After gulping down half of it he finally replied, “She often has to come up with notes, or deliveries. If I’m around she says hi.” He shrugged but didn’t meet my gaze.
“No, there’s more to it than that. She’s far too familiar with you considering she’s just one of your employees.”
His movements stilled. “What do you mean?”
“There is just seems to be something awkward between the two of you, like there is some kind of history there.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he mumbled and raised the bottle to his lips again.
The more I thought about it, the more I found their whole interaction strange. “Don’t lie to me, Craig, I can tell when something’s off. You promised you would always be totally honest with me.”
Craig kept the bottle fused to his lips for longer than was necessary. He had the look of a man contemplating how to address the world’s greatest problems. The only problem he had to address right then was being open and honest with me. I was beginning to think he was going to retain his secrets again, but then he placed the bottle on the table and looked up at me, his green eyes burning with determination.
“I wasn’t going to say anything. Not because I have anything to hide, I just didn’t want to upset you.”
“Go on.” A frisson of fear had goosebumps breaking out across my skin and I felt suddenly icy cold.
“She was in my office yesterday.”
“Yeah, you said she often needs to go up there,” I said wrapping my arms over my chest in a vain attempt to try and warm up. I couldn’t understand why meeting with one of his employees would cause such a reaction in him.
“No, she…” he sighed and started rubbing at the back of his neck before continuing. “She came in after Margaret left. She… let’s just say she wanted more than a signature on some paperwork.” My eyes widened as I realised what he was saying. He continued quickly before I was able to say anything. “She tried to proposition me, hoping for something I stupidly gave her once, a long time ago.” He leaned back in his seat but kept his eyes on mine. They looked wary, unsure.
Oh God, no. Please no, not her.
I had the overwhelming urge to do what I do best… run. I wanted to get to my feet and flee, but I forced myself to remain seated. I needed to hear him out, if there was more to this I’d consider bolting then. For now, though, I needed to let him speak.
“I swear to God nothing happened, baby. She tried but I pushed her awa
y. I told her that nothing would ever happen between us again. She knows I’m madly in love with you for fucks sake. She’s just a pathetic, desperate bitch who I deeply regret ever touching. You have to believe me.”
Closing my eyes, I took a few deep calming breaths trying to gather my thoughts. It would be so easy to not believe him, to think the worst and run. But I did believe him. I trusted him with my life. Jenny; not at all. She struck me as a desperate Real Housewives wannabe who would do whatever she needed to make sure she ensnared her chosen man. It didn’t matter who she hurt or what devastation she might cause along the way.
I opened my eyes and looked back at Craig. There was fear and desperation, and more than a hint of regret burning deep in his gaze. It was at that moment I realised without a doubt that he was being totally honest with me. He was as scared of losing me as I was of him. “I believe you, Craig. But you should have told me straight away. What if I’d seen her first and she’d let slip what had happened, I might have seen things differently then.”
I heard his sigh of relief at the same time his shoulders slumped. “I’m sorry Ambs. I really am. I have absolutely no interest in Jenny and as far as I’m concerned she needs to stay as far away from us as possible. I won’t risk anything, or anyone coming between us, not again.” A hand skated across the table top and rubbed soothingly along my arm.
Craig’s eyes darted toward the front of restaurant before looking back at me. “Do you just want to get our food to take out? We can enjoy it and relax at home, just the two of us.”
The thought of getting out of there and back to the tranquillity of our home sounded divine so we quickly finished our drinks and asked Marco to have our food packaged up in take-out boxes. With our food in hand, Craig paid the bill and then grabbed my hand leading me through the restaurant. As we were about to step through the door Jenny shouted something from behind us that sounded a lot like “be with me again.” I didn’t get a chance to turn and shout that she didn’t have a hope in hell, because Craig tugged on my hand and ushered me out into the cold night air.
Silver Dove (Silver #2) Page 11