by K. J. Dahlen
My heart raced a little faster as I watched him. Jason was thin but muscular, and even from this distance, I could tell he was darkly handsome.
I had to look away again, completely this time. How could I find anyone attractive at a time like this! It was terrible. I was such a shitty person. I had to close my eyes. I just wanted to not exist. With all the sounds, I couldn’t keep them closed for long and when they did open... I almost had a heart attack, fell over and died right there.
Jason was looking right at me.
I froze. My breath turned to sand in my lungs. I couldn’t get my body to do anything but stare at him. I was a living statue.
He regarded me curiously and smiled more to himself than to me, I think.
I didn’t know how much time passed while we just looked at one another, but without breaking eye contact or alerting anyone else, he pressed one finger to his lips. Quiet.
I swallowed, nodding. Had I been able to remove my mouth and throw it away I would have.
There was a click behind me. Todd had loaded his pistol and leaned around the corner before I could stop him. He’d finally built up enough courage to act. What that action was, would be anyone’s guess.
Jason immediately saw Todd and his expression darkened into a disappointed frown. He slapped the biker’s shoulder next to him, held up three fingers and pointed to us. Without a word exchanged, three men took off running.
“Fuck! Hide!” Todd blurted in a mad panic at being confronted. His cowardice immediately broke through whatever resolve he’d mustered, because he shoved me behind a flimsy stack of pallets in his dash to get to his truck.
I grabbed one of the tires and blocked off the gap between the back wall of the building and the pallet stack, then slid down behind it,
Oh, God, would this be enough?
I needed to call the cops, but my cell phone was inside. Who am I kidding? I didn’t have reception here; most of the time it was turned off in my room.
I hate Oklahoma.
I was pretty sure Todd was just going to bail on me, the spineless fuck. But he didn’t have the chance. The first three shots were blocked by the pallets, so I couldn’t actually see them, but fuck, they were loud!
I cupped a hand over my mouth to muffle a scream that refused to stop. Was Todd really shooting at them? Was he insane? There were twenty guys out there!
“Yeah! Take that, you faggot biker fucks! I got enough for all of ya’ll,” Todd taunted desperately trying to keep the shakiness from his voice. When he backed up, I could see Todd clearly through the cracks in my pallet wall. With upturned eyebrows and sweat streaming down his face in rivulets, it was easy to see his confidence wavered on a knife’s edge. The second his bravado was tested, he would crumble.
And where did that leave me?
“I’m a goddamn war-hero, bitch.” Todd postured and spouted off at the mouth like he was in a rap video. “You think I’m afraid of y—”
First, it was the sound of rapid, heavy footsteps crunching on gravel, then the whistle and finally the right cross that killed Todd’s blaze of glory. Todd was dropped like a sack of rice, his gun clattering across the ground.
Jason stood right on the other side of my palate wall. I saw him as clear as the creeping sunset that nearly silhouetted him. His sleeves were rolled up to show off his corded, steel forearms, and scarred rough hands.
Jason thumbed the hammer of a large revolver from the resting to the firing position, then back again as he looked down at the pathetic, sniveling creature. His mouth hung partially agape, his own face twisted in grief and disbelief at what just happened. Eyes welling with tears, he drew in a ragged breath and hung his head.
Jesus, what the hell just happened? I couldn’t see who Todd was shooting at from my little hidey-hole.
“Oh fuck, Remy…” another biker choked out the words. “I think Bren’s dead.”
Remy? That was Jason’s actual name?
“I—I didn’t mean to—” Todd stammered, openly crying. Todd raised his hands defensively, horror splayed across his features as he realized just how bad he’d fucked up.
“Yeah,” was the only word out of Remy’s mouth as he raised his head and snapped a hateful glare at Todd. The sadness was deeply set into the wrinkles on Remy’s face, but it paled in comparison to the rage that flared out of his eyes.
Remy raised his gun hand without a breath of hesitation and turned Todd’s head into so much wet confetti.
Clasping my hand back over my mouth, I fought down the swell of acidic vomit that cascaded up to my throat.
I had just watched a man I knew die.
It was the single most horrible thing I’d ever seen in my entire life, but I still couldn’t tear my gaze away from the handsome monster who’d killed Todd.
“Crutch?” Remy asked, his body sagging as he ran a hand over his face. His thick brown eyebrows slightly shifted upwards, and the lines in his frown deepened. Remy’s breath came in ragged, measured breaths as if he pushed down a growing mournfulness.
“I’m okay,” Crutch’s words were strained. The man sounded like he was in rough shape.
“It’s always fucking Crutch. Heh,” another biker gruffly added. “What’d your mom feed you when you was a kid, magnets?”
“Watch your fucking mouth. Have some fucking respect.” I heard someone punch someone else in reply.
My gaze was still numbly transfixed on Remy.
“Fuck, Tee! That hurt. Nah shit... I’m sorry, Remy. Bren... Bren was a real good—”
Who is Bren?
Remy peered off in the distance. His head was so far away that I doubt he heard the other bikers at all. He wiped his eyes and nose with his arm, swallowed then finally turned back to the other men. “Tee, help Crutch back to his bike and see if Twatch can patch him up enough to ride.” Remy’s voice cracked at first, but he coughed, took a breath, then pushed through, “Dollar, you string that piece of shit to the back of my bike. I want to litter the road with his fucking corpse.”
The edge that crept into his voice made me shiver all over.
“What about Bren?” Tee asked.
“I’ll bring him to Top. He’ll want to be the one to take him to Muse’s place. Hoze, Black Nicky, tear this fucking place apart. I don’t want any more surprises tonight.”
“You got it Rem,” Black Nicky replied.
Remy’s eyes flashed past me as he turned, then for a brief moment flicked back. He saw right through my hiding place, saw right through me.
I was in shock, stinging tears streamed down my face. Again, I couldn’t breathe. My bottom lip bled from how tight I bit it.
“Back’s clear. Start around the side.” Remy lifted his gaze and walked forward like I didn’t exist. When he disappeared behind me, presumably to pick up Bren’s body, I was able to finally take in air. He definitely saw me…
Why didn’t he say anything?
“Well, well, well, what do we got here? Good thing I doubled back.” My flimsy pallet shelter toppled as the man Remy called Hose put a shoulder into it. His greasy hands grasped me.
I screamed, thrashing in the struggle until my head bounced off the back of the building. Stars burned across my blurry vision as I was dragged out through the splintered, wooden debris of my makeshift shelter. It was a miracle that my glasses stayed on.
“You see my boy here, kill your boyfriend?” Hose glared down at me. It was more of an accusation than a question.
I tried to say “No” but nothing came out.
“Speak up, bitch. I ain’t got all night.” He pulled out his gun and leaned in so close that the chewing tobacco he had in his lower lip spattered my face when he talked.
“Fuck you.” I was as surprised as him when those words quietly escaped my mouth.
Where did that come from?
Despite knowing how this was probably going to go, I honestly didn’t think I had that kind of defiance in me. I always shied away from conflict and here I was cussing out a biker? Was thi
s what I was really like when at the end of my rope?
“This cunt’s got a mouth on her. Oh, how I wish I had the time...” Hose dragged me to my knees and pushed my face hard into the crotch of his pants.
I felt the heat through the denim as he dragged my face back and forth. Then I felt the barrel of the gun pressed against the side of my head.
“Let her up,” Remy’s voice boomed.
“You’re fuckin’ with me, right? She saw you, man!” Hose argued, but Remy only narrowed his eyes. He sighed in resignation. “Aright-aright-aright.”
“You wanna die on your knees?” Remy turned his attention to me. “Stand up.”
No. I stood up—I didn’t want to die at all!
God, I hoped that wasn’t still an option.
Bren’s body was propped over Remy’s shoulder with careful ease bordering on reverence. Although he wasn’t bulky for his height, he was solid and surprisingly strong. Remy seemed to radiate a primal denseness like the gravity around him was somehow heavier.
There was some renewed shouting out front, followed by two gunshots.
“Shit, Rem, looks like Top got the news.” Black Nicky propped his hands on his hips and shook his head.
Remy looked past the other biker to the men by the pump, then back out into the distance. The muted sadness on his face deepened into a contemplative haze. He squinted directly into the last few rays of the dying sun as if he could burn the lingering memories of what had happened from his mind.
“Did they kill my Aunt and Uncle?” The dry, cracked words fled from my quivering lips. I could barely see through my tired, red eyes. How long had I been quietly sobbing?
None of the other bikers would look me in the eyes, except Remy. He held my gaze but said nothing.
I slapped him.
I couldn’t believe I’d just done that, but I was proud of myself for not recoiling in fear. I was too scared shit-less to be some kind of badass. Where was all this defiance coming from?
“Tonight wasn’t supposed to go down like this. We both got dealt a shit hand.” Remy let out a long, low exhale, flicking his mournful gaze back at me.
“Monster,” I spat the word through renewed tears. Todd, Aunty and Uncle… I might not have liked them, but they didn’t deserve to die. I stared hard into Remy’s stoic, dark eyes and found myself trying to slap him again.
This time, he’d easily caught my hand. “You got two choices. Make a break for it right now and get shot in the back, or walk back to Top and the rest of the guys with me. I don’t know which is the mercy.”
“Which would you chose?” I asked.
“I’d have run.” Remy’s lips pushed into a thin white line as he brushed past me. “Bring her.”
Hose grabbed me and dragged me behind him. When we passed the side window, I could see the fire spreading quickly through the small store. The heat forced my already irritated eyes into slivers. I saw my textbooks on the counter next to the ransacked cash registers.
They burned.
Leaning or sitting on their bikes, the Steel Veins waited for us. Twenty sets of hungry eyes looked at me like I was a choice cut of steak. They either wanted to cut me up for what happened to their friend or eat me.
I’m sure many wanted both.
It was dark enough that the front parking lot and gas pumps were awash in the brilliant, yellow-orange light from the fire. It gave everything a hellish hue. Had I already died?
Was one of them the Devil?
The Devil would ride a Harley, wouldn’t he?
I didn’t actually know if they were all Harleys. I realized that aside from the few bikes that came in for a fill-up, I’d never even touched a motorcycle. For the most part, all their bikes looked the same- big headlights, teardrop gas tanks, fat tires and almost fully exposed engines. The exception was the bike I saw Remy’s on earlier. That one looked Japanese, maybe?
My distraction was cut short when I saw both the bodies. I felt horrible, but oddly, this time I didn’t cry. The whole thing felt real in a way and completely fake at the same time. I mean, I knew it was real. This was way too dark for one of those prank-based reality shows, but I never got to know my aunt and uncle.
Looking at them lying on the ground I found myself feeling bad about feeling bad. It was almost like I didn’t have the right to grieve over these people.
I’d been up here a few months for school, but before that, I’d only seen them at weddings and once for a funeral. In my twenty-one years on this planet, I might have seen my aunt and uncle five times at most.
Originally, I was going to stay local and go to the college I’d started, but after my scandal with Professor Baker, my parents were far too eager to send me away. I really couldn’t blame them. Jonathan’s wife was very vocal and made our lives hell.
The college out here wasn’t my first choice, but the legal fees from my indiscretion were stacking up and for everyone’s sake, I needed to get away. So, to save money, my dad asked his sister if I could take their spare room. My aunt agreed, and here I was.
Now they were dead, I didn’t fully know how to feel about it.
Everyone wearing a bandanna removed it as Remy gently placed Bren across the gas tank on the lead motorcycle.
Top, the bearded behemoth who’d slapped my aunt earlier, was openly weeping. He grabbed Remy in a giant bear hug. Remy wasn’t a small man, probably five foot ten, maybe a hundred and seventy or eighty pounds, but in Top’s embrace, he looked like a little boy.
Remy patted him a few times on the back then began to tie Bren’s arms and legs up and secure him to the bike.
For a cold-blooded murderer, he looked so solemn. Bren must’ve meant something to him as well, because he couldn’t be that deathly serious all the time, could he?
“Why’s this dead bitch standing in front of me?”
When Top spoke in that tone, everyone stopped and listened, but no one answered. I bet most of them, including myself, were wondering the same question.
Why hadn’t they killed me already?
“We’re taking her with us.” Remy pulled the final strap tight and checked to make sure Bren was fully secured before turning back to address Top.
“And why are we doing that?” Top asked, eyes narrowing at me.
“She didn’t kill Bren, that shit-heel did.” Remy cocked a thumb over to the corpse Dollar was still in the process of tying off to the back of Remy’s bike.
“I don’t give a rat’s dick if she did or didn’t.” Top was fuming. He was practically itching to violently vent his frustration. “Did she see you kill that shitheel?”
“What difference does it make if we kill her here or at Muse’s?” Remy shrugged it off.
“Rem, I’m all for you gettin’ your dick wet, but there’s plenty of pussy at Muse’s place. Hell, I’ll have her drag all the girls out. I’m sure tonight we’re all gonna need them anyhow.”
“No.” Remy walked right up to the giant. “She stays.”
“Like hell she does.” Top roughly grabbed my hair and easily dropped me to my knees.
I screamed and thrashed until I felt the cold edge of a knife against my throat. For such a large man, he was horribly fast. My eyes went wide in panic, but I stayed as quiet as the grave. All the while, staring, pleading with Remy. But why did I think he would help me? He was the only one I’d actually seen commit murder.
“Top, wait,” Remy snapped. “I need some strange tonight. I’m tired of those worn out whores.”
Top reluctantly pulled the knife away and pushed me onto the ground.
I landed in a fetal position and with shaking hands touched my neck. My fingers came away bloody, but not bloody enough to be life-threatening. You almost died, said the booming voice in my head and even that was almost drowned out by my pulse which sounded like machinegun fire in my ears.
“Fine. But I get first crack at her.” Top wrenched me out of my stupor and back to my feet.
His concrete slab of a hand slapped my ass so
hard that I lifted off the ground and after the searing pain, it immediately went numb.
“When you’re done, the boys get to turn her out too.”
“Whatever.” Remy shook his head in indifference. There was a bit of reluctance in his voice, but the roles were crystal clear. Although Remy had the balls to stand up to him, Top was the man in charge.
“Alright, let’s get the fuck out of here,” Top bellowed, as I imagined a Norse god might as he led his men into battle, then mounted up.
The rest of the bikers followed suit.
A wave of apathy rolled over me. I should’ve listened to him. I should’ve ran. Getting shot in the back had to be better than… The thought of what waited for me wherever we were going was unfathomable. These things don’t happen to quiet, boring girls like me. This killer bought me another night but at what cost?
By sunrise, I’d wish I were dead.
“Get on the bike,” Remy said.
I hesitated, weighing what little I had for options.
“Are you going to run?” Remy eyed me carefully. His deep brown eyes glinted with curiosity, but behind that was something else…remorse, maybe?
I opened my mouth to speak, but couldn’t find any words worth saying. The remorse was for his friend who died, not for me. Maybe I should just run. That had to be better than being raped.
Remy gently placed my glasses in my hand and pushed me toward the bike.
I hadn’t even noticed I’d lost them.
Shame, that was it. It was written all over his face. Remy didn’t like what was happening to me.
But could I trust him?
No, of course not. Hope was ridiculous, but I couldn’t willingly decide to kill myself either. I sighed at my own weakness and got on his bike.
Once I was on, he checked to make sure the lead line attached to what was left of Todd was secured then he hopped on himself.
There was a small, beaten up book sticking out of his back pocket. The title wasn’t showing but the author’s name was Lovecraft. I’d never heard of him or her. The font and cover art had the look of classic literature. It struck me how odd that was for a biker to carry around.