by Rose Croft
“I’m fine.” My jaw clenched, and I got my shit together. I wasn’t the one who lost control. I pushed around them and gathered my stuff as though I did this on a daily basis because at this point, who gave a fuck what they thought? I was always eccentric at best, but a damn good football player and they were all living in my fucking house. To be fair, they paid rent, too, but I found the place. Screw them. I was allowed to have an off day.
Roman
I walked into the science building, knowing she would be in her biochemistry class down the hall. I had some bullshit life science class where the professor was a big Falcons fan, and if I skipped, he would make sure it didn’t fuck up my attendance. “Roman, you’re angry. Why?” Taylor sidled up beside me; her fingers curled around my neck.
I’d known Taylor since we were toddlers. It was basically written since the day we were born that our families wanted us to marry. Our parents had been best friends in college. My dad was already born into family legacy being the son of one of the largest tequila distributors in Mexico whose tradition dated back to the mid-eighteen hundreds. My father grew up in Jalisco, Mexico, earned a scholarship to the University of Texas, and set out to prove to the world he was not just living off the family money. He had a spectacular pedigree, but he also branched out on his own and started his own local tequila distillery thirty years ago in Austin, and it took off like wildfire. He made hand over fist money on that deal being one of the top US made tequilas in the world. My father expected me to follow in his footsteps and marry Taylor as if all things could be wrapped up in a nice big bow.
My playing football was never of much interest to him. He didn’t have to say it, but I knew when I talked about going to the pros, he laughed as though it were a fool’s dream. For as long as I could remember, he already had it set in his mind I’d step into the family business. Antoni was the one who seemed more well-suited to follow in my father’s footsteps. He fell in line along with everyone who worked for him because Robert Martinez was like King Midas. Pops had everything going for him for so long. Everything ended up golden for him, with the exception of my mother’s accident…
“Roman, hello? What is wrong with you?”
“Nothing. Why are you so dramatic all the time?”
“Stop it. You’re trying to avoid the question.”
I had a love/hate relationship with Taylor. Like I said, we knew our families had plotted for us to be together since we were kids. Although she had no feelings for me in the boyfriend sense, Taylor never went against her parents. She was never my choice either. I’d given my heart away years ago…It didn’t matter anymore. I got with the program, and here we were. Two performers pleasing our families.
“I’m here, what do you want?” My words were perfunctory.
“Where were you? You seemed to be off in your own world again.”
“I’m fucking here,” I stressed again. “Stop trying to point out my faults, or we can discuss your faults, too.”
“Shut up.”
Taylor was a beautiful, graceful girl who had no animosity as far as the rich girl cultural usually played out. She wasn’t vindictive; she wasn’t trying to take over the world as a rich bitch who bathed in Louis Vuitton. She very well could’ve played that part with ease if she had that type of personality. God knew the setting was already staged for her. However, she wasn’t like that. But she had her secrets, too. Maybe that’s why we worked so well together.
I caught a glimpse of Theodora entering the building as I stood in the main area like a fucking creeper, wanting more encounters with her. Hoping to find a reason to be alone with her. Did I really need a reason? I’d already fucked up my subtleness with her, and at this point I guess it really didn’t matter. Whether or not fueled by hate, well, that really didn’t matter either.
“I’ll catch you later.” I waved off Taylor.
“But what about class? You already missed Tuesday’s,” she warned.
“Take good notes for me, and I’ll talk to the professor.”
Like someone in a trance, I strode down the hall, hooked a left, and took the steps halfway down the hall and waited, again as she stepped into her class. A repeat of the other day. I contemplated going in to her class, but maybe I’d realized this was a little too much. Maybe crashing every class she had was a little over the top. Or maybe I didn’t give a shit what it looked like. I passed through the doorway and scanned the room until I found her in the back with several empty seats around her. Even better.
She had her head down in her textbook as I approached but looked up when I slid into the seat next to her. She scowled at me slamming her textbook shut, gathering her things about to scramble out of her seat. I grasped her thigh firmly, jerking her back in her chair.
“Have you made it your mission to stalk me now?”
“Maybe I did.”
She slapped her hand over mine covering her thigh and tried to pry it off. She’d always had spunk and right now her fight was making my dick hard just like yesterday. “Get your hand off of me!” she rushed out in my face, digging her nails into my skin. Some guy in front of us turned and glanced back at us and Theodora stilled. I could feel the heat on her skin. When his eyes landed on me, he nodded in recognition since he was one of the red-shirt freshman players on our team.
“Is there a problem?” The professor stopped writing whatever equation he’d scribbled on the board at the head of the auditorium. He was watching Theodora with raised eyes.
“No,” she answered with a leveled voice. Satisfied, he lifted his dry erase marker about to write some more. Then, I heard, “Wait, Dr. Lamewell. Yes, there is a problem,” Theodora responded with shoulders raised in confidence, and I peered at her curiously. She shifted her thigh away from my hand and aimed a thumb at me. “He’s not enrolled in this class.”
He tilted his head, while several students had their eyes leveled on me. Ah, my little Theodora thought she was so clever, as indicated by the tilt of her lips. Did she not know who I was? “Is there a reason you are disrupting my class? Do I need to report this to the dean?” Dr. Lame Ass questioned.
“No. I added this class to my schedule earlier today.” I stared down at Theodora and smiled. “I just need your signature, but I was going to wait until after class to ask.”
“Fine. Fine,” he answered as though annoyed we were wasting his precious time. He went back to writing his chicken scratch on the board.
“You’re lying.”
I leaned in and brushed her ear. “And you’re fucking turning me on.” A small breath escaped her as she turned her head away. Her cheeks flushed and damn if I hadn’t seen anything more beautiful. Somehow, the notion pissed me off too—how she still had this pull over me where I thought about the happy times we’d shared. My thoughts unwillingly went back to our first kiss.
I’d returned home from football practice one afternoon. It was now dusk outside being late October, and the sunsets were earlier. The house was shrouded in semi-darkness and quiet. As usual my father was gone on business. He was rarely around and who knew where my brother was. Probably holed up in his room, plotting to take over the world. Rhonda, Theodora’s mom, was undoubtedly in my mother’s room since she was her caretaker. Mom had been paralyzed from the waist down ever since that fateful car accident eight years ago.
I passed through the kitchen about to make my way to her master bedroom at the end of the hall, but a movement caught my eye through a window out back. I turned and studied the waif figure, seeing strands of blond hair floating through the air as a gust of wind blew. Seeing her shoulders slumped made my chest tighten, and I opened the door leading out to the patio.
Theodora was standing by the edge of the pool with her head down. I saw the jerky rise and fall of her back and heard small sniffles. Something about her tears made me want to hold her and bring a smile to her face.
I stood beside her and bent down to her level so I could see her face that was splotchy and tear-stained. “What’s wrong?”
She swiped at her cheeks and looked away, avoiding my face. “Nothing.” I knew she was embarrassed I caught her crying. Theodora always tried to portray a toughness and had never cried in front of me, except for that one night when she got the scar on her arm.
Regardless, something must’ve happened at school. It was her first year in high school, and Lake Crest High wasn’t the easiest place for a newcomer who didn’t come from money. She didn’t wear the finest clothes or accessories and didn’t live in her own mansion. She lived in our grand home since her mom needed to be available around the clock to care for my mother. People knew it, and whispers were heard around school how she earned her keep by sleeping with me. Whoever said that shit, I shut it down real quick. I would never let anyone hurt her. When I found out who made her cry, they’d wished they’d never thought about crossing Theodora Daniels. Because they were fucking with me, too.
“I’m fine.” She sniffled again.
“What happened, Theodora? Talk to me.” I laid an index finger under her chin, lifting her face to mine. “You know I’ll ask around and find out, so you might as well tell me.”
I saw the stubborn set of her jaw, but she finally relented. She knew I would figure it out, eventually. “Someone broke into my gym locker when I was showering and tore up my new dress I’d worn to school today. Ripped it to shreds and carved Roman’s slut on the locker door. If people want to call me names fine, but that dress was a birthday present from my mom. She saved up her money to buy it for me.”
“Fuck.”
“And the bracelet you gave me was stolen,” she added shakily.
Fury shot through me like never before. I was there this past weekend when our family had a birthday party for her to celebrate her fifteenth birthday. She was so excited about the dress her mother had given her. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that I’d bought it because her mom had come to me pleading that she didn’t have the money to buy it. And the white gold chain bracelet I’d given her was sentimental. When we were younger, Theodora made me a bracelet out of craft beads in elementary school. Now, it didn’t fit my wrist but I kept it in a safe place in my room. It was one of my favorite gifts I’d ever received.
“I’m sorry, Roman. I loved that bracelet, too. I know it was expensive. Somehow I’ll pay you back.” Her lips quivered like she was ashamed, and her eyes glassed up.
“No.” I pulled her against me. She was broken and was breaking me too. “No, Corazón, you have nothing to apologize for. I’ll find out who did this.” I had a fairly good idea of who it could’ve been. And, when I was through with whoever did, they’d wish I’d just turned them in to the principal.
“Why did you call me that?”
I stroked her hair as she gazed up at me, waiting to respond. “What?”
“Corazón. You’ve never called me that before.” She smiled tentatively
“I didn’t realize I did.”
“Don’t lie,” she teased. I knew Theodora always followed me around when we were younger and had an innocent crush on me. It was cute then. Now it wasn’t so cute since she didn’t look like a little girl anymore. She was beautiful, stunning even, and her spirit always intrigued me considering her humble background. She also knew when I was lying and would call me out without hesitation. She knew me. Really knew me.
I just smiled in answer and smoothed a stray strand out of her face.
“How is that I feel safe around you?”
“Because you’ve known me for years.”
She put her hand on my left pec. “You know. You’re my heart, too.”
Her innocent words shot straight to my already erratic organ pounding in my chest.
“I’m embarrassing you, aren’t I?” She chewed on her plump bottom lip, and I had an overwhelming urge to taste her mouth.
“Never, Theodora, you never embarrass me.” My voice sounded like someone had scraped sandpaper against my vocal chords. “You make me proud and I won’t let anyone take that pride away from you.” My nose touched hers and I knew the inevitable was going to happen, but I was too caught up to stop. My lips touched hers softly at first, and she kissed me back as a small sound came from the back of her throat. Soon, I gripped her cheeks between my palms, desperate for more. She opened her mouth to me and I delved in deeper, wanting to lose myself in her. My senses were overwhelmed by an innocent kiss from this girl who I’d known for years…
My mind came back to the present. “That’s all for today, I would encourage you look over polymers in living systems and types of biochemical reactions because there will be a quiz next class.” I didn’t even know what the fuck this guy was talking about. I’d been sitting in some kind of time capsule of memories and studied Theodora as she typed notes on her laptop the whole time the professor spoke.
“Hey, man, you pumped about the game Saturday night?” The guy sitting in front of me, from the practice squad, asked. I couldn’t remember his name, and wasn’t in the mood to talk shop. People were filing out, and Theodora gathered up her things.
“Yeah,” I answered in annoyance because she slid out of her seat and scooted off in the opposite direction down the aisle to the far exit.
“Me too. If we win, we could be ranked in the top ten in the nation.”
He was talking, but I was too busy watching her slip out the door. I stood up and acknowledged whatever he’d said with a nod. I was already plotting the next time I’d see my little lying Theodora again. You’re my heart, too. Her words from the past were etched in my soul.
Theodora
Kenzie: U r going 2 the game with me tomorrow nite.
Kenzie: Not taking no for an answer.
I sighed, clicking off the message as I sat down in my seat. This time I moved over to the opposite side of the auditorium where only one seat was open among a cluster of students just in case class crasher showed up. Once settled, I clicked on my phone and answered.
Me: Fine.
I crouched down lower in my chair, hoping to stay incognito. The guy beside me was pretty tall and brawny, so it was hard to see past him. Feeling mixed relief that I didn’t see him, I relaxed and clicked on my Chromebook. Dr. Smith was arranging his notes at the podium. He was an older man and apparently had an aversion to technology since most professors used the projector and built-in computer at the podium for their slide presentations.
“What’s up, my man? I didn’t know you were in this class,” beefy guy beside me spoke, and I knew before I even looked up who it was.
“Move,” Roman ordered.
“What?”
“Move. Go. Find another seat.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re fucking sitting next to my girl. Move before I lose my shit.”
“Look, bro, she sat next to me.” The large guy stood up with arms raised innocently and shook his head before trudging several seats over.
Roman dropped down in the chair beside me. “Changing seats. How inventive of you.” He reached out and tapped my cheek, and I yanked his hand away.
“Showing up in classes you aren’t enrolled in. How desperate.”
“I am enrolled in this class.” He pulled out a paper showing someone’s signature. “So we’re going to see a lot of each other. Get used to it, and stop trying to hide.”
“I wasn’t hiding. I was avoiding distractions.”
“Is that what I am to you? A distraction?” He flashed a cocky smile. “Because you sure as fuck are a distraction to me. Especially when you get all feisty.”
He was a big distraction that was growing worse and worse with each interlude between us. “By the way, I’m not your girl.”
“Is that right?” He said it in a way that he didn’t believe my statement.
“Okay, it’s nine o’clock, so let’s begin,” Dr. Smith announced.
I glanced behind me to see if Nick and Axel were here and saw them in the back where we normally sat. Nick smiled wide and waved while Axel saluted me with two fingers to the templ
e.
When I turned back, Roman glared at me. “Don’t push me.”
“Or what? You’ll sexually harass me again?” I knew as soon as the words fled my mouth, I’d regret them. His normal caramel eyes turned black. Regardless, I foolishly kept my composure staring right back. Finally, I forced my attention to the lecture. I could feel his eyes raking over me while I took notes.
He moved closer and said quietly for only me to hear. “If I ran light kisses down your skin right here…” He trailed an index finger lightly down the pulse of my neck. “You wouldn’t like that? You always did before.” Goose bumps rose on my arms. “Or if I closed my thumb and finger over your nipple it wouldn’t be sharp as a diamond like the other day?” His fingers slid down my side luckily he didn’t give an explicit demo. “Or what if I nibbled on your clit while I shoved my tongue in your pussy, would you be dripping wet for me?”
His hand was now at my hip, caressing me with his fingers, and I shifted uncomfortably. “Please, stop.” My words were soft.
“I won’t ever stop…with you.” He squeezed my hip and released me, letting me stew with confusion and a funny warmth bubbling in my stomach. However, he did seem to concentrate on class and not bother me anymore.
I studied him out of the corner of my eye. He did have an arresting profile with his thick inky hair spilling over his forehead. His nose was straight and aristocratic. His mouth was full, and I remembered how it felt against my lips and my skin. He had on a red jersey with his number, I’d noticed other players wearing theirs too since it was Friday and the game was tomorrow.
I thought back to when I used to wear his jersey to his games in high school. Now, I wondered if Taylor was the one who wore his number. Did she write him little notes before the games like I used to? Did she bask in his happiness when they won? Did she console him when they lost? Why was I even thinking about her? Why was I thinking about him? Why was Roman following me around if they were together?