“Nia, do you have a boyfriend?” He knew he was prying, but he couldn’t help but think what a cute couple she and his cousin Kane would make.
Nia lit up like a Christmas tree, “No, sir, not at all. This was it! He was going to ask her out! “Why do you ask?” she couldn’t wait to go out with him.
“I know this is none of my business, Nia, so tell me to butt out anytime. But I have a cousin I’d like to introduce you to. I mean, if you’d be interested in meeting him, that is.”
Nia fought to keep an unreadable look in her eyes along with a fake smile plastered on her lips. “That’s very kind of you, sir.”
“But?” he asked, hearing the reservation in her tone.
Nia simply shook her head in response.
Barrington nodded and smiled. “But you’d rather find your own man.”
“You can say something like that,” she said. She was uncomfortable with him playing matchmaker.
“I understand, Nia. But you know what? Maybe he’s already looking for you.”
Nia couldn’t help smiling at him affectionately.”I hope so, sir. I hope so.”
An idea occurred to Barrington. “Nia, it’s been awhile since you had a vacation, hasn’t it?”
“I suppose so, but I’m okay with that.” He just couldn’t send her away.
“Point is you shouldn’t have to be okay with it.” Barrington pulled out several hundred more dollars from his wallet. “I want you to take the next two weeks off and go on a long overdue vacation, Nia. Go somewhere warm and fun. Perhaps even a trip back home,” he suggested, handing her the additional bills.
“Sir, that really is not necessary. I’m fine with my life the way it is. Really I am.”
Barrington shook his head firmly, his mind made up. “I insist, Nia.”
“Yes, sir,” Nia simply said, accepting the money as she swallowed her pride and disappointment. “Thank you, sir.”
“You’re very welcome, Nia.” Barrington was glad he could do something good for someone since he couldn’t seem to make heads or tails where Perri, the true love of his life was concerned.
Chapter Nine
Barrington had been behind the wheel for the last few hours with no distinct destination in mind until he found himself exiting his car at his parents’ home; he knew his mind had taken temporary leave of absence because he was clueless to the fact that he’d even been driving in that direction, and couldn’t recall even turning into their driveway. He needed more time to talk to Perri to at least try to understand was going through her head when she decided he shouldn’t be involved in his own child’s life. He knew he should have called Perri by now, but realizing he was still angry with her, he thought it wise to wait until he was somewhat calmer; not that she would be looking forward to him calling, anyway, and that truth alone bothered the hell out of him. Mine, he thought. Perri would always be his in his heart regardless if she liked it or not.
His family was seated at the dining room table eating supper when he came through the back door and, plastering on his game face, he tried to appear normal having decided not to mention the Perri and Imani situation even though it was still weighing heavily on his mind. As it was, he and Crush didn’t put in as much family time as his mother expected, so he would be a good son and give her his full attention today knowing that after his visit with his daughter this evening all his free time would be spent getting to know Imani. He sighed, hoping that time would include Perri.
“Hey, Barry,” Linda Knight lit up at the sight of her handsome older son.
“Hey, Ma,” Barrington strained a smile for the sake of his dear mom.
“About time you showed your face around here,” Crush said, biting into another chicken leg; probably his fourth piece knowing his brother.
“Good of you to grace us with your presence, son,” Bobby said with a perceptive look.
Barrington attempted to laugh it off, knowing he must be wearing his feelings on his face despite his best effort to pull the wool over his parents’ eyes. At this rate, he’d be busting his guts open and spilling all his newly found knowledge before even he had a chance to process it all internally. Not that he’d ever understand Perri. “I was just thinking the same thing, Daddy.”
“Of course you were,” Bobby said, “you are your father’s son.”
“Indeed.” Barrington reached for a piece of chicken, unable to resist the smell any longer.
Linda smacked his hand away. “Not until you wash your hands, boy.”
Crush laughed out loud. “Man, you know the rules when you walk up in here.”
Barrington did know, but house rules were the last thing on his mind. He walked over to the sink, washed his hands, returned to the table, and grabbed a breast. Thinking of Perri, he placed it on his plate and grabbed a thigh. Having a naughty flashback of Perri, he put that on his plate and grabbed a wing, biting into it hard. He was so out of it he wasn’t even aware his family was staring at him until he finally tore his gaze from the wing he’d just demolished in three bites.
“What?”Barrington said, annoyed that all eyes were on him.
Crush was the first to respond with a chuckle that quickly erupted into a full belly laugh when Barrington shot him the evil eye.
“Son, you think you got enough food there? If not, I got a spare drumstick.”
“Hush, Bobby,” Linda scolded her husband. “If he’s hungry he’s hungry.” She fixed her seasoned motherly gaze on Barrington. “Baby, what kind of eating regimen have you boys developed on the road? You are getting enough to eat, aren’t you?”
“Ma,” Crush spoke up, “there’s nothing wrong with my eating habits. I eat all the time.”
“I know you do,” Bobby said, chuckling.
“Barrington?” Linda continued to address her eldest son.
Dropping the bone on his plate, Barrington pushed it away. “We eat healthy. I’m good, Ma.”
“Oh?” She folded her arms. “First, you come in reaching for food before you wash your hands, then you grab enough chicken to feed Brazil, not to mention the fact you didn’t bother to come hug and kiss your only mother. But I’m supposed to believe that you’re fine. Baby, what’s bothering you, and don’t you dare lie to me by denying it,” Linda warned.
“Forgive me, Ma.” Barrington sighed heavily and got up to go hug his mom around the neck and plant a big kiss on her cheek. “Better? Still love me?”
“Don’t be fresh with me, boy. I raised you and I know you not fine. Now out with it, Barry.”
For the first time, Crush took notice of the somber look on his brother’s face. “What’s up, B?”
Bobby said, “Suppose you tell us what’s going on, son.”
Barrington complained, “Family,” and dropped in his seat.
“Is everything,” Linda told him. “Now, what is wrong with you, boy?”
“Yeah, okay. I do need to tell you guys something; something I just found out today.” He watched his family exchange curious glances and decided to just spit it out. “I’m a daddy.”
“What?” his family all asked at once.
“I have a daughter. A three month old daughter,” Barrington said, feeling proud.
Crush wanted to know, “Who’s her mama?”
“Why are you just now finding this out?” Linda demanded.
“I have a granddaughter?” Bobby didn’t bother to hide his pleasure.
“Yeah, Daddy, you do.” Barrington grinned. “She’s beautiful,” he bragged.
“Of course she is. She’s your mother’s granddaughter, isn’t she?”
“Bobby, what are you saying?” Linda was shocked at her husband’s nonchalant reaction.
“I’m congratulating our son on becoming a father, and I believe you should do the same.”
“And I think you need to hold off on your victory party.” She turned her attention back to her son. “Let me tell you something right quick; I don’t share your father’s opinion. I want answers!”
“Who did you knock up?” Crush asked again. “I’m on the road with you nine months out of a year. To my knowledge you’ve only been serious about one girl, and that was over—”
“A year and a half ago,” Barrington finished for him. “I know, Crush. I know.”
Crush was shocked. “It can’t be.”
“It is.”
“You mean Journey’s friend?” Crush let out a low whistle thankful he wasn’t standing his brother’s shoes; and he knew where Journey Stillwater was concerned he very well could have been wearing those exact same shoes. That was a secret he would carry to his grave. Not even Barrington knew about it, and he told his brother everything. He knew he could trust him not to tell anyone; he just hadn’t been willing to put Journey out there like that, not wanting anyone to look at her differently, or cast blame her way, because he was every bit as much responsible.
“The one and only, little brother,” Barrington confirmed.
“You and Perri Milan have a baby together,” Crush mused, dismissing a slight wave of envy.
“A beautiful little girl, man,” Barrington was back to grinning again.
“Damn.”
“Watch your mouth, boy!” Linda scolded.
“Sorry, Ma,” Crush apologized. “But this is one h . . . er . . . a shock.”
“Yeah, well you still know there’s no cursing in this house,” Bobby said.
“Yes, sir, I’m sorry, Daddy.”
“Apology accepted, baby,” Linda said, followed by a longsuffering sigh. “So, Crush, can I assume you’ve met the mother of our granddaughter?”
“Yeah, Ma, I have.”
Clearly hoping for more details, Linda probed, “And?”
Crush hunched his shoulders. “Her name is Perri.”
Linda narrowed her yellow-green eyes. “I heard that much, boy.” She turned back to Barrington. “You said you just found out today?”
“Yes, ma’am, I did.”
“And why is that?”
“I ran into her at the mall today,” he said, his eyes sliding to his brother. “Journey, too.”
Crush tried not to respond but couldn’t resist asking, “How is Journey?”
“As feisty as ever,” Barrington laughed, “especially where you’re concerned.”
“I bet.” Crush grinned, pushing his plate away, as an image of Journey sliced through his mind. She was the only woman—without being present— able to make him uncomfortable in a good way. He couldn’t help wondering if she were seeing someone. Then all too soon, he remembered that he had voluntarily relinquished all rights to have that question answered.
“I know one thing,” Linda announced, “somebody better start releasing some much needed information, or I’m going to find out on my own accord.”
“Baby, calm down,” Bobby told his wife. “There’s no need to get all worked up. Young people make mistakes all the time; we shouldn’t be shocked that our son happened to fall into that number.”
“Bobby, I just know you not sitting over there condoning sex outside of marriage.”
“I’m not condoning it, no, Linda. But it did take place, so all I’m saying is, since Barrington’s daughter is already here, we need to deal with the now; not backtrack to a year and a half ago.” He looked at his son and added, “Although you should have used protection, boy.”
Barrington cleared his throat, feeling like he was five all over again. And just like then, he wisely remained silent.
“So,” Crush broke the awkward silence, “what did Miss Perri have to say for herself?”
“That’s what I want to know.” Linda leaned forward, peering into her son’s yellow-green eyes as if she were glimpsing his very soul.
“She said she didn’t want to ruin my career,” Barrington told them, but it was obvious by his tone that he didn’t believe Perri’s lame excuse for a thin, crispy minute.
“And you believe her?” came Linda’s quick retort.
“Ma, Perri’s not the vindictive type,” Barrington automatically defended her actions, even though he didn’t believe her. Point was, he didn’t want anyone else to judge Perri even if he did.
“And yet son, she didn’t see fit to tell you she was having your baby until today, when you happened to run into her at the mall,” Linda felt the need to point out the obvious. “Don’t you think that leaves a lot to be desired in the faith department when it comes to this particular young lady?” she quizzed, determined to make him think with the brain in his head and not the head between his legs. She wasn’t born at the age of forty-eight; she’d been young once too.
What could Barrington say? Hadn’t he also lit into Perri for the same reason?
Linda ran a hand through her naturally curly light brown hair. “I know I raised you better than this, baby.” She bit her bottom lip, unable to hide the disappointment in her first born son. “All these diseases out here,” she said as tears welled up in her eyes.
“Ma—”
“And you being a musician and all,” she continued talking over her son. “I swear I could box your ears. What were you thinking, boy?”
“Getting inside Perri,” Barrington didn’t realize he’d voiced his thoughts until he heard the sharp gasp that he knew came from his outraged mother whose eyes were now two giant yellow orbs, that silently promised him that she was about to deliver him the sting of a yellow jacket.
Ever the instigator that he was, Crush said, “Way to go, B. Go for shock value.” He chuckled, glad he wasn’t the one sitting in the hot seat.
“Don’t be nasty at my kitchen table, boy,” Linda raised her voice at her foolish oldest son. “Look what you’re teaching your little brother, Barrington!” Crush laughed out loud and Linda arrested him with a heated glare. “Crush, cover your ears, and wipe that smirk off your face before I slap your head sideways.”
Raising his hands, Crush asked innocently, “What did I do, Ma?”
Bobby cleared his throat and all eyes went to him. “Let’s all just calm down,” he firmly suggested. “Crush, mind your manners. Barrington, we don’t need to know everything you’re thinking. Linda, what’s done is done. Barrington is grown and gone; he’s taking up his responsibility to his daughter, which is the important thing. Let’s leave it to our son’s discretion how much, if anything, he decides to share with his parents.” He looked at his younger son. “Crush, let this be a lesson to you; learn from your older brother’s experience.”
“Yes, sir,” Crush had the good sense to agree with his father. He also felt like a hypocrite avoiding his brother’s hot glare boring into him. He would tell Barrington his secret; but certainly not here in front of their parents, or even in their house. He’d talk to his brother soon.
Barrington rolled his eyes and swallowed the urge to inform his parents that Crush was no golden boy, and he could probably take a lesson from his little brother’s play book, because Lord knows the boy had bedded far more women than he had. He reminded himself that this wasn’t about Crush; it was about his own newfound family. And he wasn’t going to feel guilty that he shared a child with the only woman he’d ever been in love with. He did not regret loving Perri.
“Ma, I apologize that my lack of control hurt you; however, I refuse to view my daughter as anything but a huge blessing in my otherwise lonely life, and I look forward to spoiling her rotten. But on the day she was conceived, I wasn’t thinking with my top head,” he admitted, cursing himself for failing to protect Perri during that last bout of heated passion between them.
Seeing the sincerity in her son’s eyes and hearing it in the way he carefully revealed his love for his baby girl, Linda said, “Your father’s right, Barry. Your daughter—what’s her name?”
That easily pulled a smile out of Barrington. He was eager to share, “Imani Sinclair Milan.”
For the first time since hearing the news, Linda slightly smiled. “That is a beautiful name, son.” Raising her head a notch, she continued, “Well, like your father said, Imani is here. But tha
t mother of hers is a different story,” she said, tightly. “What kind of woman doesn’t bother to let the father know he’s got a baby on the way?” She shook her head, frustrated. “Is it because of your money? Does she intend to sue you for half of your earnings?”
Holding up an impatient hand, Barrington quickly set the record straight, a trait passed down to him from his mother. “Ma, I told you Perri’s not like that; she doesn’t care one bit about my money. Even if she did, I love her enough to let her have it all long as it meant I’d have a second chance to undo all the anguish I caused her.”
“So this wasn’t some random one night stand with a grubby groupie.” Linda was grateful.
“Perri and I were involved exclusively for a year and six months, Ma, although we’d been friends a year prior to getting together and becoming an official, couple.”
“And you never brought her by to meet us, son,” said Bobby. “Mind telling us why?”
“Daddy, it’s hard to maintain a long distance relationship. Crush and I spend so much time on the road we have to make the face time we do have to put into a relationship count. I wanted Perri to myself when we were in town, so that left no time to bring her home to meet you guys.”
“Yet, Crush knew about her,” Linda argued.
“Only because I work with B, Ma; basically, we know the same people,” Crush offered.
“Linda,” Bobby said, “these boys each have their own house to keep up. In all fairness, we can’t expect them to spend all their time here with us when they get a break to breathe.”
“You’re right, baby,” Linda agreed. “Even so, they have phones all over the country.” To her sons she said, “And you two carry your cell phones around like it is part of your wardrobe.”
Barrington reached across the table for his mother’s hand and kissed it. “Ma, I am so very sorry I disappointed you. I honestly did not mean to hurt you.”
If I'd Only Known (Milan Women Series Book 1) Page 11