Chuckling, he pinched the sides of his mouth slowly and she closed her eyes.
Please don’t say it.
“Again. I was just curious how and with whom you were spending your time.”
“That’s none of your concern,” she inhaled, standing straighter. How did he even know about Shay?
“It is when it involves my child.”
“You are no father to that baby girl.” She shouldn’t have said it. It was only going to anger him further, but she couldn’t hold it back. Not anymore.
“You are aware that I can get joint custody whenever I choose to,” he said evenly, his eyes hard. “Full custody if I’m in the mood to just stick it to you.”
He was sickening. If she thought she stood a chance against him, she would grab a mallet chasing him out of town like she had seen her mawmaw do a time or two. “If you wanted a family so badly then why did you leave, Adam?” Aside from it all, she needed to know. Needed closure and maybe another excuse to hate him further. Hate was an ugly word, but the only word to describe her feelings for the man standing in front of her. Moving close to her. Too close. She could feel his breath on her as he ran his finger down her jaw.
“Don’t flatter yourself, darlin’. You were simply a piece of the bigger picture.” Intimidating her space, her back met the wall as memories of him getting in her face before rambling off in a drunken rage flooded back. She needed to choose her next words very carefully. The words full custody still making her sick to her stomach. “A pretty sweet part if I do remember correctly,” he winked, sweeping his finger slowly across her chest and she smacked his hand away. Chuckling, he didn’t move looking down at her and she had visions of kneeing him in the groin. “You broke everyone’s heart when you left home to run off to play party host.”
“- Event coordinator,” she corrected. “I am an event coordinator.”
“Yes, well, I wasn’t about to let four years of ass kissing and listening to your father’s college crew stories go down the drain,” he said calmly, too calm, sweeping a piece of hair behind her ear. “You left me no choice but to come after you.”
The proposal.
“Your daddy was pretty pleased when I promised to bring you back home. And let’s just say that he was more than willing to show his appreciation with some advancements at the firm. It was almost too easy, really,” he breathed against her and she wanted to be sick. “You were so naive. All you wanted was a family so unlike your own and all I had to do was make you believe that you would have that. But then you went ahead and got pregnant,” he growled through his teeth. As if she had done that all on her own. “You started making a home here and I knew that I was never going to convince you to leave. Tack on Georgie graduating the head of her class, my offer was being reconsidered.”
It was all making sense now. The proposal, the panic when Georgie was graduating and the angry outbursts when she continuously refused to move back to Louisiana.
“I thought for sure when I emptied the accounts and kicked you out of the townhouse you’d come crawling back. If not to me, then at least to your parents.”
“You disgust me,” she spat, looking up at him.
Chuckling, he ran his fingers down her cheek and her skin crawled. “It all worked itself out though. Turns out your papa has made some very unpopular decisions concerning a lot of board members’ money. Once I hand in my proposal to not only reinstate their investments, but to double it, they’re not going to let your papa run that firm without me. And when I’m finished there won’t be much for you to return home to anyway. I also have a feeling that you won’t be received as warmly as you would expect.” Gripping her chin, he lifted her face to look at him. She could see the devil in his eyes. “Do you have any idea what you almost cost me?” Moving her head, he tightened his grip, leaning against her face. Closing her eyes, she braced herself. “How many years I almost wasted pretending to give a shit about you?”
“Get your fucking hands off her,” she heard before Adam’s hands were ripped from her face. Opening her eyes she saw Shay lunging as his fist connected with Adam’s face knocking him down to the ground.
“Shay,” she cried, trying to grab him. She didn’t need him getting hurt. Or worse, getting slapped with a lawsuit or anything that could hurt him or his career. “Stop.”
Adam’s groans filled the condo as Shay picked him up by his shirt, completely ignoring her. Slamming him against the wall, it felt like the entire house shook. Getting in Adam’s face, Shay seethed through his teeth. “You don’t touch her. You don’t breathe near her. You don’t even look at her,” he said slowly. “You stay away from her and you stay away from Quinn or I can promise you that you will never walk another day in your life. You understand me?”
Smirking as blood dripped from his mouth, Shay pushed Adam harder up against the wall. “Do you understand me!” he screamed and she felt it in her soul. Shaking his head, Adam clenched his jaw. Letting go of his shirt, Shay let Adam fall to his feet nearly losing his balance.
Gripping onto the counter for support, she heard Quinn cry. Running into the other room, she scooped her baby girl up. She felt safer having her in her arms. Quietly walking back into the living room, she watched Adam wipe his mouth as Shay clenched his fists again.
“If you weren’t already on your way out of Charleston, I’d slap you with an order to stay the hell away from my daughter.” Adam’s eyes cut through Shay.
On his way out?
“What?” she stuttered, panic spiking again; or maybe it was still adrenaline, but the look on Shay’s face scared her. “What is he talkin’ about Shay?”
Snickering, Adam pointed towards Shay. “Oh you didn’t know that your boyfriend here is getting ready to be traded? It’s all over the sports news.” Watching Shay grind his teeth, she curled Quinn closer into her. Opening and closing his fist, he wouldn’t even look at her. He needed to say something. Why wasn’t he saying anything? “Last I heard it was San Francisco, right jockstrap?” Adam asked, looking between the two of them.
Clutching Quinn in her arms, her small breath on her shoulder, the room felt like it was spinning. Shay was leaving Charleston? Scoffing, Adam wiped his jaw with his thumb again. Moving slowly to the door, he left without another word and she thought she would be relieved, but she felt sick.
“Whit-”
“You lied to me.” She wasn’t sure if he had actually lied or not, only that he hadn’t told her that he could be leaving. Or that he was leaving, she wasn’t sure which, but it wasn’t okay. Because none of what just happened was okay.
“I didn’t lie to you. I just didn’t say anything until I knew for certain.”
Shaking her head frantically, she felt light headed. What was happening? She had just spent four years of her life being a pawn in a chess game for Adam’s career. Her papa had been in on some strategy to force her to live a life that she didn’t want and the man she had fallen in love with was moving across the country without even telling her. “I am so sick and tired of being lied to,” she whispered, cradling Quinn’s head in her hands.
“Whitney,” he warned, taking a step closer.
“I’m so tired of being disposable to people.”
“Don’t you compare me to that asshole,” Shay ordered and she wanted to smack him. Who did he think he was having the right to tell her what to do?
“You used me as a safeguard with your family at Thanksgiving,” she swallowed back the tears. It all making sense now. “And you used me to pass the time before you left for California.”
“No.”
“It never made any sense why you were so adamant about me planning your stupid birthday party and why you insisted on taking me home with you for the holidays,” her voiced cracked as she clenched onto Quinn. Was she just some charity case to him this whole time? Had he just felt sorry for her?”
“Whitney. You’re really on edge with what just went down. You need to slow down-”
“-Were you even going
to tell me before it was a signed deal?”
He hesitated a moment and her heart broke. Closing her eyes gently, she snickered “And right there. I just found my answer.”
How could she have been so silly? How could she of been so blind?
“Whitney,” his eyes narrowed on her and she wasn’t sure how much longer she could keep herself together.
“Go, Shay.”
His eyes flashing with fury, his face paled and he stared back at her, “Whitney.”
“-We don’t need your charity,” she managed, the first tear falling. She wanted him to give her all the reasons why she was wrong. Wrong about all of this. That she was way off base here, but he wasn’t. He just stood there. Looking torn. “And we don’t need you.”
Pain flashing across his face at that last comment, she felt like a bullet to the heart. Staring at her, he took one hard look as he swiped his mouth with his hand before making his way towards the door. Looking at her once more over his shoulder, she looked away. She couldn’t look at him. She was hanging on by a thread. At the sound of the door closing, her knees finally gave out beneath her as she slid down the wall losing all control. Crying into her baby girl’s dark hair, her body shook. Two men had used her, but only one of them had just walked right out the door with her heart.
“What the hell am I watching out there!?” Throwing his clipboard across the sidelines, Griffin screamed, yanking down his mouthpiece nearly ripping his entire headset off. “I don’t give a fuck who’s out there,” his voice rose for better measure. “Pick it up!”
Spitting, Shay pushed his helmet back down securing it on the side. They were getting creamed by Kansas City, but more importantly they were making stupid mistakes. Pacing up and down the sidelines, Monaghan screamed at each of them.
“Cunningham,” Griffin yelled again, this time through his teeth. “What the hell is the pause for out there?” he asked pointing towards the field. “Don’t evaluate, just fucking do it!” He was right. He was slow and thinking too much. “Now get out there and show me something, will ya?” Coach yelled again. “God damn it!”
Trotting onto the field, the noise inside Arrowhead Stadium hit the roof as he lined up waiting on Monaghan’s call. A shuttle pass to Kendrick, Shay went for the cornerback, missing the block.
Shit.
“You’re fucking up,” Kendrick screamed getting in his face. “And you’re fucking me up!”
Kendrick had better watch it. He was two seconds from killing someone and nothing would bring him more pleasure than taking out the mouthy son of a bitch.
“You’re not listening to me,” Jax yelled, grabbing his helmet cage bringing their shields together. “I don’t know what’s going on with you and right now I don’t give a shit. You get it together, Nova,” he warned pushing his helmet back. “Now.”
Lining up again, he wanted to blame the Chiefs. Their defense was just stronger today and their offense felt faster and it was cold as balls, but that wasn’t it.
It was him.
He was tripping up today and he couldn’t get a handle on it. The balls were slipping through his hands and his feet were sidestepping. He couldn’t remember a time when he had screwed up so badly. Both on the field and with a woman. But he couldn’t think about that right now. Couldn’t think about the fact that he hadn’t heard from Whitney in five days nor the agony on her face when he left.
We don’t need you.
Listening out for Monaghan who surprisingly enough had given him a pass play despite his poor performance, he didn’t hesitate before cutting around the lineman and grasping the ball between his arm and ribs.
Finally.
As Griffin screamed for a timeout, he ran to the sidelines, accepting the water being splashed in his mouth, listening to Nolan yell in his ear. He needed to get his head on straight. Football was his calling. A mission to be something bigger than just himself, pushing himself further than he could ever have imagined. On the field he didn’t see or hear or say, not really. He just felt. And he relied on those senses to close the gap between his opponents and the goal line. He couldn’t afford that guidance to be shot to hell by a sugary sweet redhead with a smile that ran east to west.
Not now.
Not if he had any hope of staying on this team. But damn it if he couldn’t get her out of his head. Yea, he’d screwed up by not telling her about his contract, but truth was, he’d been too scared. Telling her meant that hard and fast decisions needed to be made about their future. About Quinn’s future. And he wasn’t sure he was good enough to be the man that led them into that future. But he also hadn’t banked on that prick coming back and starting trouble. He should have known better.
Despite another touchdown and getting close enough down the field for a field goal, the Mavericks lost by twelve points. The locker room was quieter than usual as everyone dressed back into their suits. Which sucked. If they had won, they would have been able to fly back to Charleston in sweats. Throwing the last item inside his bag, he grinded his teeth heading out the door. He hated addressing the media after a huge fuck up. To sit there as the reporters stuck recorders and cellphones in his face while pointing out all of their obvious mistakes. To be relentlessly questioned as they looked for a single answer as to why the Mavs had taken such a beating. He just wanted to go home. Thoughts of veering off the exit right before his to Whitney’s came to mind, but he couldn’t. He shouldn’t. She needed time and as much as he wanted to tell her how ridiculous she was being, he got it. He screwed up. And nobody was less surprised than him.
Running off generic answers to all the foolish questions the media had waiting for him, he headed onto the bus. Going straight to the back, he immediately slipped on his Bose. One thing about being on the road for a game was that there was plenty of time to think. And right now thinking was painful and exhausting. Thinking had lost him today’s game. And not thinking, well that had cost him Whitney.
“Hey. Did you get a chance to sign off on those outlines, yet?” Looking up from her desk, Whitney stared up at Ross standing in her doorway.
Outlines? What in Sam Hill is he talking about?
“Oh,” she shook her head finally remembering what he was referring to. “Right.” She was a little slow to process the past few days as visions of Adam and Shay colliding taking over all the space inside her head. But those images weren’t as painful as the news that Shay was leaving Charleston without even a mention to her about it. No, those words were occupying her heart. “I haven’t,” she confessed, her hands scurrying around her desk for the plans that he, in fact, had given her days ago for the Mavericks’ charity. “But I will. I promise.” They looked great. He had everything perfectly placed in the historic estate and paired with Liv’s exquisite design of purple and gold linens, soft lighting and crystal votive candles with dark masquerade masks and glittered back chairs, she knew there was no reason to sign off on anything. It was sexy, it was mysterious and it was for a great cause. It would be wonderful.
“You alright, darlin’?” Ross asked and she looked up at him. His black rimmed glasses resting peacefully on his round face.
“Mmhmm,” she hummed quickly looking away because she couldn’t bear to lie to him. He was too good to her and she respected him too much. “Just tired is all.” Grinning, she hoped he would accept her fake smile. She had a fifty-fifty chance of that working. The mess in her personal life had no relevance to her work. Falling in love with a man who had lied to her and who had one foot out of the city had absolutely no impact on her work. It couldn’t. She had Quinn and that was her priority. What should have been her only focus before getting pulled into a pair of ice blue eyes by a man who was never going to grow up. One who was always going to punish himself for what happened to his brother. Living his life to the maximum to try and fix something. And maybe that was what she was to him. Something to fix.
Eyeing her, she knew he was ready to call her bluff as Charlotte’s voice rang pulling his attention down the hallway.
Lord, thank you for your favor.
“You just can’t stay away, can you?” he smiled, pushing off the doorframe before wrapping Charlotte into a hug. “You know, you’re always more than welcome to come back and not file all of that paperwork,” he winked. “Plus, between us, Whitney doesn’t order my latte, correctly.”
“Heard that,” she jotted down a few notes for herself on the prints. And she wasn’t aware that there was a wrong way to order steamed milk?
Chuckling, he shook his head as Charlotte plopped down in her chair, pushing her messy hair off her face she reached for a Hershey’s Kiss out of the bowl on the edge of the desk.
“Alright, I’ll be back,” Ross exhaled, handing Whitney a stack of papers for the mayor’s nephew’s wedding she presumed. “Jax is stuck at practice all day and Liv has an ultrasound,” he smiled and Whitney couldn’t help but smile a little. He was such a wonderful friend. “I get to see my new niece.”
“Wait. Liv’s having another girl?” Charlotte asked, unwrapping the chocolate. “I thought they were waiting to find out.”
“Oh, they are waiting,” Ross nodded grabbing a Hershey’s Kiss of his own. “But that man is destined to be ruled by mini versions of Liv his entire life,” he smirked past the chocolate in his mouth. “You mark my words.”
Agreeing with Ross, she promised to hold things down until he got back. The office was silent, the quiet music the only sound as she looked down at her work, thankful for the distraction. She wanted as much work as she could handle, maybe even a little more. She needed to focus on her career and her future. She also needed much more to design and highlight and revise to keep her from re-reading Shay’s letter for the hundredth time. Raising her eyes to Charlotte, she felt guilty that she hadn’t told her about what had happened with Adam. She was fairly certain that Charlotte would go ballistic and castrate the man. And as much as that notion made her more than satisfied, his words still hurt too much and she feared that she would never be able to erase them from her mind. Whether he was castrated or not.
Hail Mary (The Mavericks Series) Page 26