The rest of the day went on in much the same way. After lunch, she headed back to the ER.
Desire came in at three and showed her how the filing system worked, what her job would be if she had to scrub in with one of the doctors, and what to do afterward.
At six, they had dinner. Holly took an apple to munch on for eight o’clock, just to fill that empty spot.
By seven-thirty, the ER was quiet. Some interns had left at seven, but they would be back at six the next morning. Holly was part of the lucky few who had to stay. She would have done anything for her bed, or any bed. But Desire had said she shouldn’t lie down before ten in the evening. She still hadn’t shown her where yet.
Holly found the maternity ward on the fourth floor and spent some time watching all the healthy newborn babies through the glass. Taking her apple out, she took a bite. Since her daughters’ birth, Holly felt some kind of peace with newborns. She didn’t know if it was what they represented—new life—or whether it was because they were so fragile and so little that she felt needed. It put her in the ‘zone,’ as some would say.
Why she hadn’t become a pediatrician was beyond her. Frank constantly suggested it, but she never saw herself in a ped’s shoes. She loved the fact that her patients could tell her what was wrong with them. Newborns—all babies for that matter—were so much more difficult when it came to finding out what the problem was. That had been the case, so far, in her experience.
“You are not allowed to eat in here,” a doctor reprimanded. She was tall, had dark hair, and was either in her early forties or late thirties.
“Sorry.” Holly put her half-eaten apple back in her pocket.
The doctor laughed. “I won’t tell. I sure as hell know they won’t, either.” She gestured to the babies. “I’m Dr. Matthews, and you are one of the new interns, I presume?”
“I am, Holly Scallanger, the one from Seattle.” She held out her other hand, and Dr. Matthews shook it.
“It’s so sad that Seattle Grace lost their title. I was a resident there.”
“You were?”
“Yes, Dr. Edwards was one of my mentors.”
“I know him well; my mom is a nurse there.”
“Oh, good for her. So, what is it you want to do, Dr. Scallanger?”
“Cardiology, but for some reason I love watching newborn babies.”
“Me, too, which is why I became a pediatrician,” she said as she walked away.
Since no one else was around, Holly took out her apple and finished it. Returning to the ER at around eight-fifteen, she sat behind the reception desk, along with Rev, who was playing with a stress ball, tossing it up into the air.
“Favorite food?” he asked.
“Salad,” Holly joked.
“Really?”
She laughed. “No, but I absolutely love that look you guys give when I say it. Burger, fries, and light beer.”
“That’s more like it.”
“Smoke?” He queried, lifting a brow.
“No, ew.”
“Never?”
“I used to, but I’m so glad I kicked that habit.”
“Weed?”
“Twice. Even worse.”
He laughed.
“Kid’s name?”
“No. Forget I have one, okay? I don’t want people to know I have a child.”
“Why not?”
“Because they look at you funny. Like, why isn’t she with you, and all that crap.”
“She’s not with you?” His face became serious.
“See,” she said.
“It’s not like that.” He rearranged his facial expression quickly.
“No, she’s back in Seattle with my mom.”
“Not so bad. My mom worked hard, too, especially after my dad left. It’s part of life, Holly.”
She smiled, knowing what that was like and could relate. “Fine. Her name is Jamie, but keep it to yourself, please.”
He looked at his watch and grunted. “This is so boring.”
“Tell me about it.”
“So, you live in the motel down the street, too?”
She squinted at him. Rev was looking for a place to stay. “Nope, I live in a huge fire station that was turned into a five-bedroom apartment. If you’re super nice, I’ll let you rent one of the rooms.” She rested her head on the edge of the chair, and with her feet touching the floor, she spun around.
He stopped her chair and spun it to face him.
Holly opened her eyes.
“You’re fucking kidding me, seriously?”
She giggled. “Yes, I don’t know how much Rod is charging, but I’m sure it can’t be that much.”
“Who’s Rod?” he asked.
“My husband.”
“You’re married, too?”
“No, idiot. He’s my roommate, and no relation, okay?” She laughed.
“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” he repeated heavenward, which only made her smile again.
At least she’d made one person happy today. Taking her phone out, she sent Rod a message.
I found a roomie. He’s cute.
Her phone buzzed.
How cute?
At least an eight.
Then… it’s his.
Holly snorted. “The room is yours, if you want it.”
“Can I move in tomorrow?”
“If you want.”
“Yes!” he shouted, pumping the air with his fist.
Following his excitement, Rev left Holly on her own to wander around the ER.
She must have dozed off; she awoke to frantic shouts. The ER was buzzing with activity from a head-on collision that involved five passengers. Holly was needed. Blood and guts were literally spewed everywhere.
Rev rushed in. They both began working on one of the patients, cleaning up as much of the blood as they could, trying to locate all possible wounds and doing their best to keep the patient calm until a doctor was available. As they waited, they took blood to send to the lab, as required by strict hospital rules.
Shocked, Holly couldn’t believe her ears when they were both ordered to scrub in. Dr. Green and another heart surgeon, Dr. Jacobs, whose name was reflected on the white coat, arrived to take the patient to the OR. She was finally going to see the inside of an OR.
Her adrenaline levels hit the roof. She was pumped with all the action around her. The patient went into cardiac arrest, blood spewed in every direction, doctors and nurses hurried back and forth—it was crazy. But that was precisely what she’d been looking forward to, not that she wanted any patient to suffer longer than was necessary, but being in the OR, helping, meant that she was learning—and that was a good thing. After an excruciating struggle, the patient survived.
They walked out of the ER at eight in the morning, both beyond exhausted, but on a high from the rush.
“Great job, Dr. Scallanger,” Dr. Jacobs acknowledged.
Thanking him, Holly filled in the chart, making notes on the procedure as she remembered them, while Dr. Green filled in his own chart. Rev had wanted to do it, but Oliver Green was somewhat of a perfectionist.
Rev waited for Holly to finish with her chart, and when she went to file it, she asked Dr. Green if she could file his, too.
“Go home, Dr. Scallanger.” He flashed her a smile.
Joining Rev, they made their way to the locker rooms, cleaned up and changed, and then she took him to his new home.
Rev’s eyes grew as he lowered his head to see better through the windshield when they neared the fire station. “This is fucking awesome,” he said, stretching the sentence out, as she got out of his car.
Smiling tiredly, Holly motioned for Rev to follow her up the stairs, but her exhaustion was showing as she rattled the keys, trying to find the correct one. When she did, she opened the door and revealed a still-unfurnished, spacious apartment.
“I’ll get you a key as soon as I wake up, then I’ll get the electricity turned on. Promise.”
“Cold sh
ower?”
“Sorry, Rev.”
“Fine by me.” He winked, walking toward the window to peer outside.
A young, tiny, brown-haired girl walked into the lounge, with only a towel covering her body, and one on her head.
Holly stared at her. She wasn’t the only one; she could feel Rev watching the girl, too. Holly could just imagine what was going through that head of his.
“You must be Holly, right?” the girl asked, holding her hand out to her. “I’m Julia. Rodney said it was fine if I took one of the rooms.”
“Hi, Julia. Great. This is Rev, by the way, and he’s going to take one of the other rooms. We just need one more person.”
Julia shook her head. “Nope, it’s already taken. By Bridgette.”
“Got it,” Holly said. “I’m off to bed, then. Are you going to be okay to find it again from the motel?” She asked Rev, to which he nodded.
“Awesome. Here.” She threw him her keys. “I’m off to bed. Happy moving, Rev.”
“Thanks, Holly.”
She left Rev and Julia to their own devices. They started to chat amongst themselves. She walked to the end of the hall where her room, one of the most amazing ones, was situated. Rod had taken the other large room with an en suite bathroom. Julia, Rev, and Bridgette would have to share a bathroom. Luckily, that wasn’t her problem.
She toed off her shoes and fell onto her bed, feeling satisfied. She’d been in the OR during her very first shift when all the others were sleeping, and it turned out to be everything she’d ever dreamed of.
For some reason, Jake flew through her mind again. She knew that the image her mind remembered wasn’t doing him any justice; she couldn’t remember his smile anymore, or how he used to smell. She couldn’t even remember the sound of his voice, just that it was manly, and that she loved every single ounce of him.
Her heart still ached over the fact that he’d turned out to be such a coward. Pathetically, she still missed him, but there was absolutely nothing she could do about that now. He was getting married and she had to try her utmost not to bump into him. He could never find out where she worked.
Holly would have to endure the stories Rod would share with her—he would find a way to get Jake to notice him. He was that good.
On that thought, Holly felt herself slipping into the dream world.
JAKE
“AND YOU THINK THIS WHY, JAKE?”
“I don’t know, Blair. I’m just telling you what I’m experiencing.” Jake was sitting on the white couch again, the one he’d thought he’d never see for the rest of his life. Until three days ago, when he suddenly couldn’t breathe.
“You think it has anything to do with... say… getting married?”
Jake chuckled. “It’s not cold feet. They are toasty warm. But seeing them everywhere…” He rubbed a hand over his face in frustration. It felt unreal, like he was stuck in the Twilight Zone. He sounded utterly stupid. Pathetic. “…Doesn’t help.”
“Them. So what, you can’t say the name now?”
Jake sighed. “I don’t know what it means. Maybe I’m not ready to get married. I don’t know. That’s why I’m here. Again.”
“Jake, you sorted all this out two years ago.”
“I know. But it’s like fate doesn’t want me to be happy.”
“Bull,” Blair countered. He couldn’t help but laugh. “You are the only patient that I can be totally open with, the only one I can tell how I truly feel. You have all the right in this world to be happy. You survived something horrible no one should ever have to go through, and you got out by moving forward. Just look at what you have achieved. Seeing strawberry blondes everywhere isn’t fate telling you not to marry Kate.”
“Seeing real strawberry blondes, not the bottle kind.”
Blair looked up at the ceiling, closed her eyes, and smiled.
“I never used to see them. Now they pop up like daisies everywhere. It’s weird.”
“It’s not fate, Jake,” she said, looking back at him.
“Then what, it’s a test? I’m starting to feel as if I’m going to lose my mind again. What if I fail this test?”
“How are you going to fail it, by running after all of them and what, screwing their brains out?”
Jake almost choked.
“You are not that Jake anymore.”
He gave her a puppy-dog look.
“I don’t know why they’re popping up, er… like daisies. All I know is that you are past this. You don’t need me anymore.”
“Then why do I feel—”
“Jake, do you hear yourself? Look at you. You’re doing so well. Don’t let a couple of strawberry blondes make you feel otherwise.”
It was silent for a while.
“You still see her in every one of them?”
Jake nodded. “For about five seconds and then it disappears, revealing whoever that person really is.”
Blair sighed. “You are wired differently than most of my patients. If you weren’t so bloody smart, and your mother wasn’t one of my best friends, I would’ve chucked you in an asylum.”
Jake laughed. “I wasn’t far from locked up once.”
“Bull again. You are strong, and seeing these women…”
“Yeah, you’ve said it already.”
“It’s the truth. Be happy, Jake. Only you can make that happen.”
“Okay, fine.” He got up, and took a deep breath. “So what do I do with these urges whenever I see one?” he joked.
“What urges? I thought we were past this.” She was getting upset.
Jake started to laugh. “Just joking. No urges.”
She rolled up a piece of paper and chucked it at him. “Just go, before I truly admit you to a nuthouse!” she yelled after him as he closed the door.
Cido smiled at him with bright, beautiful white teeth as he passed the reception desk.
“I’ve made a weekly appointment for you again. Hope you don’t mind.”
Jake grimaced. “Cancel them, Cido. I’m fine. Don’t need to come and see the loon anymore.”
She giggled; they used to joke that it took a loon to treat a loon.
“Man, and here I was excited to see your sweet ass every week again,” she flirted, without an ounce of shyness in her tone.
“Sorry about that. This ass needs to get back to the hospital.” Walking toward the door, he swung it open as fast as he could and ran down the step two at a time. He hated the flirting.
When he opened the door that led outside, he almost walked into another strawberry blonde. The real kind. “So, so sorry. Are you okay?” He looked at her, and all he saw was Holly’s face. His heart contracted. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath, and when he opened them again, she had disappeared.
“I’m…” the woman cleared her throat. “…I’m fine, thanks,” she said, her cheeks flushed.
Jake apologized again, stepped to the side to allow her access, then closed the door once she’d entered the building.
Ten altogether now. Ten fucking strawberry blondes in three days. And they were all natural, not bottle enhanced. That was something he could tell a mile away, since it had an awful chemical reaction that turned their hair a pinkish or orangey hue, which was just hideous.
He blew out a breath, his lips vibrating, and walked to his SUV. A part of him thought that he was never going to get over what happened four years ago. Ever. But Blair was right; he had to move on, he had to be happy. Even if it was just for his family. He’d put them through so much already. They didn’t deserve any more shit.
HOLLY
Before Holly knew it, the first month was over. Just another three and she could go home to see Jamie for her fourth birthday.
Her roommates weren’t that bad. Okay, Rev was a total slob, but she was grateful for him and his car, which meant the days he didn’t work, and she did, he left her the car. It was fabulous.
Bridgette was a tall blonde. She was curvy but not fat and really had the most beauti
ful face. She was funny too, and Rod had connected with her the same way Holly had.
Julia was this tiny petite thing with long brown hair and big, brown doe eyes. She was also one of those girls who couldn’t stop talking about Macaroon.
Holly hated every moment she talked about her fantasies aloud, and to top it all off, for the past two weeks she’d had to listen to lengthy descriptions of how perfect Jake was, as Rodney scrubbed in almost every day with him. It wasn’t like she could have avoided it. Rod was gifted, a go-getter. Jake could choose who he wanted to work with; it seemed Rod, even though he was only an intern, had earned that privilege. Nothing scared her friend off. He was a neurologist’s dream, clever as hell, and knew as much about the brain as Holly knew about hearts. He had a steady pair of hands, as all doctors should have, but his were near perfect, and his reflexes were crazy fast. Holly was sure he would give Jake a run for his money when he finally came into his own. Dealing with death was another of his strong points. Holly, on the other hand, hadn’t yet had the opportunity to find out how she would deal with death.
Rod had already lost three patients—or rather, Jake had lost three while Rod was scrubbed in with him. All three had been given a ten percent chance at recovery due to their tumors, which by any normal standards were crazy huge. Rodney couldn’t stop chattering about it whenever they saw one another, even though their time was limited. He’d learned, in one month alone, more than he’d learned in his four years at med school.
What Rod was learning from Jake was more precious than her feelings, and she would never rob that from him just because she couldn’t stand hearing about Jake.
Most doctors wouldn’t even treat tumors that size or dare remove them, but Jake wasn’t one of them. Holly still admired that about Jake, the Jake Rod had in his head. Not the Jake who’d shunned her and their babies. She just hoped Rod never told Jake the story about his friend who refused to work at P&E.
Thankfully, she hadn’t run into him yet. There were only eleven more months to go before she was home free. But it cost her a lot, since she spent most of her time at home while the others went to the bar near P&E. Often, she’d even pretend to be too old for the crowd when they went to the beach.
Secret Love (The 4Ever Series Book 2) Page 4