“That’s tomorrow,” she told him weakly. The store had emptied a short while ago so they were sitting at the corner table.
“Yes my dear, short notice I know but I am sure you’ll make it.” He patted her hand fondly and stood up to leave. “Tell Deacon I will speak to him later concerning Sunday.” With a wave he left, leaving Sara staring after him in bewilderment. She had committed to something and she had no idea when she had done so.
*****
Sara dressed carefully the next day. She had planned on going to church straight from work and she was determined to look her best; it was a matter of pride, she thought grimly, pulling on a slim fitting green cotton skirt and a sleeveless green and yellow silk blouse. She added green accessories and black pumps. Her hair had grown somewhat since she had been back and it fell in lustrous wave over her forehead.
The store was very busy and before she knew it; it was time to leave. “Dad I will see you later at home,” she picked up her pocket book from the office and headed for the door.
“Be safe,” he told her with a smile and went back to the cash register where he was ringing up a sale.
There was no other car in the parking lot when she got there and at first she thought she was early; she knew David drove a pickup truck that he used to make deliveries in and it was nowhere to be seen. Just as she was about to get out of the car, she saw the side door opened and he came out. Her heart thudded inside her; it was actually good to see him. He was wearing blue slacks and a blue dress shirt which was opened at the neck, revealing a glimpse of dark chest hair.
“I see you’re right on time,” he said, coming to stand beside the car. “Nice wheels,” he murmured appreciatively, running a hand over the shiny red surface.
“Thanks,” she murmured. “Where are the others?”
“The young people will be here shortly, so let’s go inside. I want to discuss some of the plans I have for the concert.” He opened her door for her and she stepped out, she could not help but notice his eyes on her bare legs.
He preceded her and held the door open for her. They were in the large church hall and Sara remembered the many times she and David and several others had stayed until way into the night to practice some play or songs or just hang out and quizzed each other on upcoming tests at school – it had been their hang out spot and at one point, where they had cuddled and kissed when the others had left. Sara stole a look at him to see if he remembered but he had gone up to where the music was.
“It looks the same,” she murmured, looking around at all the empty seats.
“Except for the addition of a keyboard,” he pointed to the corner. “It’s the same.”
He took a seat and invited her to join him. With a slight hesitation, she did; staying far away from him.
“I won’t bite, Sara,” he told her in amusement. “Not unless you invite me to,” his tone changed to one of huskiness. He stared at her and she stared back, mesmerized by his dark brown eyes. It was the babble of voices coming inside the door that broke the spell.
He got up and took charge, leaving her rooted to the bench, trying to gather her wits. With a deep breath she rose and joined him as he spoke to the young members.
He wanted a concert with a difference. There would be the usual singing but he wanted to depict some of the gospel reading in dramatic prose. And he wanted dances as well. The meeting went off without a hitch and with a feeling of great anticipation they made a date to meet right after church on Sunday.
She was wondering how soon she could leave when he came over to her. “I am begging for a ride,” he told her casually, facing her. “My truck is in the shop and I don’t want to take a cab back.”
“Of course,” she forced the words out of her mouth.
“Thanks,” he told her briefly, striding away to collect some papers he had on a desk. She waited outside for him while he closed up.
She got in the car as soon as she saw him coming and he got into the passenger side.
He tried to adjust his long frame to the bucket seat, shifting several times until he got comfortable. “I missed you at church the week before,” he commented.
“I was not feeling well,” she shrugged, her eyes on the road.
“So Deacon said,” he was staring at her and she felt his eyes on her. “Were you really not feeling well?”
She sent him a heated look, turning back to the road as she saw the hint of amusement on his face.
“I don’t have to answer to you,” she said loftily; praying that she would reach his house quickly. It was a cool night and she had forgotten to wear a sweater. She wound up the window with a slight shiver.
“Cold?” his voice was concerned. And before she knew what he was doing, she felt his hand on her arm; slowly rubbing it.
“What are you doing?” she asked sharply, pulling away from him.
“Trying to warm you up,” he drawled. “Or am I making you too hot?”
“You wish,” she retorted, her skin still tingling from his touch.
With a sigh of relief she saw that they had reached his house and she slowed down and came to a stop; expecting him to get out.
“Want some coffee?” he queried, not moving.
“No thanks, I really need to get home,” she told him, not looking at him. She did not trust herself to be alone with him.
“Please?” he said softly. “Besides I want to show you my house.”
With a sigh Sara capitulated.
The house was three bedrooms and a big living room with comfortable furniture; there was a keyboard and a piano that stood proudly in the corner of the room. She caught a glimpse of a dining room with a large table and several chairs. “Too big for one person, I know,” he said wryly as he came back with the cups of coffee. “Still take it black?”
She nodded. She had sat down on a small red couch, to discourage him from sitting beside her but to her consternation; he pulled up a chair and sat in front of her, crowding her.
“Were you seeing someone?” he asked her abruptly, placing his cup on a table beside them.
“What?” she asked him startled.
“Were you seeing anyone while you were away Sara,” he repeated impatiently.
“That’s none of your business,” she told him heatedly, putting down her cup with the intention of leaving; but he wouldn’t let her.
“I kept thinking about you with someone else,” he told her grimly. “And I wanted to die.”
“You were with someone as well,” she whispered, her heart aching at the tortured expression on his face.
“I tried,” he stared at her. “I convinced myself that if I tried hard enough I could replace you with her. She is a nice girl, a girl any man would be proud to call his own but she was not you and every time I kissed her, I saw your face and eventually she realized and she told me that I was not ready for a relationship with someone else. She loved me and I could not love her back, because of you.”
Sara did not know what to say; she wished he had not told her but secretly she was glad that he had not been able to be with someone else. “I’m sorry,” she mumbled.
“That’s such an inadequate word isn’t it?” he mused. “Sorry I ruined your life, sorry I destroyed the love I gave you, sorry I stamped all over your heart. So inadequate.”
“David,” she began huskily, reaching out a hand to touch his strong jaw.
“Don’t,” he groaned and without another word he pulled her into his arms onto his lap. “I have tried so hard to forget you but I can’t” he whispered; his head coming down towards her; hovering as if waiting for her to stop him but she could not; she did not want to and with a sigh she reached up and put her hands around his neck. “Sara,” he groaned, taking her lips with his.
Sara’s mouth opened and she welcomed his kisses, her arms tightening around his neck as his tongue delved inside her mouth. One hand reached inside her blouse and brushed against the silk of her bra; touching the hardened nipple. She shuddered with need a
nd her body quaked as he ran his finger over her nipple, his mouth moving over hers hungrily. Sara wanted more. He was driving her crazy with need and she wanted to feel him inside her.
“David,” she tore her lips away from his. “Please.”
His mouth grazed her cheek and went further until he took the nipple inside his mouth, stroking it lovingly. Sara cried out, gripping his hair tightly, arching her back against his onslaught; she was lost and almost begging him to take her.
Suddenly, he released her nipple and set her back on the couch. Sara stared at him, her body quivering with unfulfilled need.
“I can’t” he told her huskily, he had stood up and had started pacing; his expression tortured. “I can’t get over what you did and I suffered too much when you left.”
Trembling, Sara buttoned up her blouse, her expression one of mortification. She had almost begged him to make love to her. She stood up resolutely, passing a hand over her slightly mussed hair. “I understand,” she told him coolly; there was no way she was going to let him see how much she was suffering and he was right; she had hurt him so much in the past; how could she expect him to forgive her now?
“Do you?” he looked at her with narrowed eyes. She looked so unbelievably sexy; with her slumberous dark brown eyes with their golden tints and her nipples evident in the thin blouse; it was taking all of his will not to drag her back into his arms and take her right there on the floor.
“Yes, I do,” she turned and headed towards the door.
“This is not finished Sara,” he warned her huskily as her hand reached for the door knob. “Not by a long shot.” She hesitated briefly then twisted the knob and went outside without a word.
Sara drove home blindly, her thoughts crowding inside her head. She had thought she was over him; she had thought she was in love with Michael but realize now that it was just a surface emotion; nothing like what she felt for David. She had wanted so much for him to make love to her and she shivered as she remembered how his lips felt on hers – she had almost abandoned her pride and beg him to take her.
She reached home and parked the car, sitting there silently – she had turned off the radio; she needed time to think and regroup. She had spent so much time running away from her emotions that they were at last catching up to her.
Michael had told her one time that she was too cool and uptight and she needs to loosen up. With David, she had always been herself; he knew who she was and what she was about.
Sara bit her lip as she remembered the first time they had made love. It had been the first time for both of them and she smiled sadly as she recalled how gentle he had been. They had sneaked into his house when his parents had gone to church that night. It had been her eighteenth birthday and they had wanted to celebrate it together. He had stolen a bottle of wine and taken it up to his room and had bought her a cupcake with a candle in it. They had started kissing, then he had taken off her clothes, his hands trembling. He had told her how beautiful she was, the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his life and he wanted to please her so much. She had taken off his clothes shyly; her innocent hands reaching out to take hold of his penis; her expression curious. They had fumbled their way around each other and when he placed his erection inside her she had cried out in pain. He had wanted to stop but she would not let him and after a while the pain had lessened and the pleasure had increased. He came before her; his hoarse cry echoing around the room; she came soon after; sinking her teeth into his shoulder as the pleasure coursed through her body. It had taken a while for his shoulder to heal and the bite marks to fade and he wore it proudly; saying it was her brand on him.
Sara stared unseeingly into the night. The night had gone a little chilly and she shivered slightly; it was such a beautiful night and summers always brought back such bitter sweet memories. So much had happened to her over the past years and she just wanted to settle down and sort her life out. She had thought she could cut it as a model but she had done a short stint and she had not made it – and the glossiness and shallow living had lost its appeal as far as she was concerned.
Sara got out of the car and locked the doors; making sure the alarm was activated and then she went inside. Her father was still up and with a cheerful smile, she greeted him. He was sitting in his favorite rocker by the window and reading his Bible. “Everything went well?” he placed his finger on the page as he looked at her.
“Yes,” she told him, going over to kiss his cheek softly. “I am going to bed now Dad, don’t stay up too late.”
She went up to her bedroom and took off her clothes going straight to the bathroom; and it was there with the water running off her body that she gave in to her emotions; her body shaking with tears.
Chapter 4
“Pass me the lemon juice will you? It’s in the refrigerator on the top shelf,” Callie stirred the chicken and covered it to simmer. Sara passed the lemon juice to her. They were at Callie’s house and she was busy preparing dinner for her men, as she called them. She had invited Sara over for dinner and her husband and son had gone to the park for the afternoon.
“I can’t get over how domesticated you have become,” Sara marveled, taking a seat on the stool by the counter and propping her chin on her hand as she watched her friend move around the kitchen. The house was nice and homely, with touches of color everywhere and scattering of toys all around. Callie had given up working at an accounting firm to be a stay at home mom.
“That’s me I have become a stepford wife and the kind of woman we used to deride, remember?” she shook her head wryly. It was Saturday afternoon and a week had passed since the debacle at David’s house and Sara was almost back to normal. She had seen him one time after that when they had met with the young people to plan some more but he had kept his distance and so had she.
“Do you have any regrets?” Sara popped a grape into her mouth and chewed the sweet fruit with relish. She was still in her work clothes; jeans and a dress shirt and her father had shooed her out to go and do something; so she had accepted Callie’s invitation.
“About marrying Paul or staying at home?” Callie's eyebrows rose inquiringly as she sprinkled lemon juice into the pot with the chicken.
“Staying at home,” Sara said.
“Sometimes,” Callie shrugged, coming to sit on the stool beside Sara. “Sometimes I feel like I would just tear my hair out. And when Ben is asleep, I find myself wandering the house trying to find something to do; there is only so much daytime T.V. you can watch before you start growing numb.”
“I don’t know if I could do it,” Sara said reflectively. “Does that make me sound selfish?”
“You’re who you are girl,” Callie went to turn the knob on the stove. Then she went to the fridge and poured them both a refreshing glass of iced tea. “I had a miscarriage two years ago, and my marriage have not been the same ever since.”
“Oh Callie, I am so sorry,” Sara exclaimed, putting down her drink and placing a hand on her friend’s.
“Paul and I went through a pretty rough patch and we separated for a couple of months,” she shook her head. “For a long time we were not sure we would ever be okay again but we’re getting there by the help of God.” She turned and faced Sara. “I needed you there and you weren’t. You were my best friend and I couldn’t even call you; I went through hell Sara and I did not have my best friend around to help me get through it.”
Sara felt the shame wash over her. She had disappointed so many people that she wondered if she was ever going to make up for what she did. She had given in to her selfish ambitions and had not cared one bit who she hurt in the process. “I was younger and very foolish and I wanted to spread my wings and I was not about to let anyone stop me. Not a loved one; not my best friend,” she look at Callie soberly.
Callie shook her head and got up; coming over to the devastated girl and giving her a hug. “You should have trust me enough to tell me what was going on with you,” she told her fiercely. “I probably would hav
e tried to talk you out of it but I would have listened.”
“I know,” Sara said tearfully, returning her hug gratefully. “Oh Callie, I have made such a mess of things and I don’t know how to fix it.”
“Stop trying to fix it,” Callie told her; giving her a squeeze before letting go and going over to the stove to save the rice that was simmering on low fire. “It will sort itself out and David will come around,” she looked at her friend shrewdly.
“How did you know-?” Sara stopped in mid-sentence.
“How did I know you two still love each other?” Callie looked at her mildly. “The sparks fly when you’re near girl; you two belong together.”
“I am not sure he thinks that anymore,” Sara said miserably.
“He will, if he doesn’t already,” Callie advised. Just then they heard Paul and Benjamin’s chatter coming up the driveway. “Men like to be pushed in the right direction.” She added; turning around to catch the running Benjamin as he launched himself into her arms chattering a mile a minute.
They had dinner and Sara felt better than she had since she had gotten back. Callie was her best friend again and she felt as if she was actually getting somewhere.
*****
The concert was well on its way and the performances were well appreciated by the audience. The church hall was packed to capacity and Sara was backstage with Callie and David and several others who were helping with props and costume changes. She had chosen to wear a flowing pink and green summer dress that left her arms bare and big gold earrings and matching bracelets. She had on minimum make up and she had caught David looking at her several times, but she had ignored him. Callie was right; it will sort itself out.
He performed a solo himself and when it was time for him to go out; he glanced at her briefly and then left.
“I told you,” Callie whispered with a grin. Paul and Benjamin were seated in the second row so that she could keep an eye on them. “That man is into you.”
Their Miracle Baby (BWWM Romance Book 1) Page 16