Sterling took a seat, pressing his forearms against the table and sitting forward. “I said she deserved better than me. Which is still the truth. And honestly, I was trying to talk myself out of any attraction I had because I know that she’s been hurt, broken, and bruised in ways that no one should ever have to withstand. So, I laid it all out for her—no guessing, no playing around. She knows where I stand, understanding that I’m broken too. What do you need to know?”
Jasper tapped the table with his thumb, his gaze narrowing as he studied Sterling. “She comes home crying because you’re an ass, or you break her heart...” He let the threat linger.
“You can take me out. I’ll give you my own gun to do the job.”
“I’m not going to prison over you. You’ll be doing the honors yourself. Understood?” Jasper asked.
Sterling bit back an amused grin. Damn it all, Jasper was the kind of guy he could actually be friends with. “Deal.”
Jasper reached across the table, offering his hand, and Sterling took it, firmly shaking once.
“Now that we have an understanding, let me tell you a little about my irritating little sister. If you’re going to have a snowball’s chance in hell, you need to listen up.”
And Sterling listened as if his life depended on it.
Because he wasn’t so sure he’d survive a broken heart.
CHAPTER 16
Harper pulled into the drive at just a quarter after noon, dusty, sweaty, and a mix of anxious and thrilled. Thrilled, because Audrey was going to be a fantastic addition to her barrel-racing team. And anxious, because Sterling’s car was still there, and she had no clue in hell what her brother had said to him.
She walked up to the house tentatively then paused as laughter sounded from inside. Confused, she opened the screen door and saw Sterling at the stove with Kessed and Jasper at the table, eating what looked like grilled cheese sandwiches. Figures.
“What did I miss, because I’m thinking it was a lot,” Harper said by way of a greeting.
“Your guy here can cook. Who knew?” Kessed lifted her sandwich in a salute to Sterling. “Seriously, though, I had no idea he could cook anything. Last I heard, Laken said he burned water.”
“Hey, that was once.” Sterling shook a spatula at Kessed while Jasper snickered.
“So, this is new. And I see no guns or blood, so I’m assuming we’re all good?” Harper asked, tossing her purse to a nearby chair.
“Yup. Chill, and grab a sandwich,” Sterling replied. “I kicked it up a notch with some hot sauce from the fridge. It’s not the same as the jalapeño bread, but it’s a definite improvement.”
“Count me in.” Harper took a seat at the table.
After Sterling served her, Harper tugged him aside while Kessed and Jasper fought teasingly over who was on dish duty. “So, what did my brother say?”
Sterling shrugged and popped the last bit of sandwich into his mouth. The definition in his face adjusted, highlighting his jawline. Her fingers itched to trace its line.
“It wasn’t a big deal. I was honest with him, like I was with you yesterday, and that’s pretty much all he wanted. No games. No breaking your heart. For the record, he didn’t give a shit if you broke mine.”
“Sounds about right.” Harper released the tension in her shoulders as she laughed softly.
“Thanks.” Sterling gave a wry grin. “Did you like the horse?”
“Yeah, I gave my verbal agreement to the deal. I’ll have Jasper look over it later and compare her stats.”
“Sounds good. Spartan is getting a girlfriend.” Sterling wagged his brows.
“Spartan is a gelding. So, Spartan is getting a friend, platonically speaking.”
“Ah, got it,” Sterling answered. “You ready to go?”
Harper gave him a dubious glance. “Like this? I smell like horse and sweat.”
Sterling leaned his head down, taking a deep breath along her ear.
The cool intake sent goose bumps prickling along her skin and caused a tickle up her spine. The world absolutely disappeared as Harper reveled in the sensation.
“You’re perfect to me, but if you want to shower and change, I think I can wait a few minutes.” Sterling patted her on the head, breaking the spell of sexual tension that he’d created.
Jasper cleared his throat.
Harper sent her brother a dirty look but turned back to Sterling. “Depends. What do you have planned today?”
“That’s for me to know, you to find out and to be amazed.” He flicked his fingers along her ribs.
Harper squealed as he tickled and swatted his hand away. “Five minutes.” She held up her hand.
“Have at it.”
Harper shrugged off her plaid shirt and tossed it into her room as she passed by then ducked into the bathroom. After taking what her brother called a “sea shower,” she quickly brushed her teeth and wrapped a towel around her body as she darted from the bathroom to her room. She didn’t miss the heated glance Sterling gave as she made the short walk, and with a wink, she closed her bedroom door.
She tossed the towel over a chair and quickly dressed, slipped her feet into some sneakers, and tightened her ponytail. Debating whether to add a swipe of mascara, she quickly grabbed her makeup bag and a few minutes later, decided she was ready.
Or not.
Mostly ready.
They’d been dancing around each other for more than a month. And in that time, she had learned a lot about Sterling’s personality, his strengths, and his weaknesses. It gave her a sense of being prepared, which allayed some of her fears.
Some.
She breathed slowly through her nose, steeling herself before she opened her bedroom door.
“I’m ready when you are.” She smiled at Sterling as she walked back into the kitchen.
His gaze swept over her, no doubt taking in all the details, probably ones even she would miss. His gray eyes were warm, heated, yet tempered with an appreciation that made her feel beautiful.
Damn, that felt good.
How long had it been since she had actually felt beautiful?
Hell, she would have been happy with feeling like she was enough. Feeling beautiful was almost too much. Like she had asked for one piece of chocolate and been given the whole factory.
“Jasper, thank you for your time this morning,” Sterling addressed her brother, offering his hand.
Jasper accepted it and gave him a curt nod, his expression a firm reminder of everything they had discussed, if she’d read it correctly. She’d received a silent reminder from her brother herself a time or two...or hundred.
Biting back a snicker, she walked over to Jasper and gave him a hug. “See you later.”
“You bet.” Then in a low whisper, he continued. “You have your knife, Mace...something?”
Harper released her brother and smacked his arm. “You have to ask?” She wagged her head at him.
“That’s my girl.”
“Do I want to know?” Sterling asked.
“Just making sure I have protection.” Harper shrugged, grinning widely at Sterling’s surprised and slightly awkward expression.
He’d misinterpreted the play on words, just as she’d intended.
“Harper!” Jasper scolded, groaning.
“You know, a knife, pepper spray, stuff like that,” she added, unable to hold back her laughter at making the situation utterly awkward for both her brother and Sterling.
“Thanks for clarifying, Harper,” Sterling replied with a hint of sarcasm.
“I got your back.”
“Yeah, sure.”
Sterling opened the door for her, and they walked out into the afternoon sun. Even if it wasn’t as warm as summer, the sun made up in intensity what it lacked in actual warmth.
“Driving, huh?” Harpe
r asked as she followed him to the sedan.
“Yup. Afraid?”
“Slightly.”
Sterling rolled his eyes but walked around to the passenger side door and opened it for Harper.
“Thanks.”
As Sterling started the car, she asked again. “So, what’s happening today?”
Sterling gave a slight shrug as he drove with one arm out the open window, his other hand relaxed on the steering wheel. “I have a plan, but first we need to pick up food. One little grilled cheese sandwich wasn’t exactly enough.”
“Pick up, as in take it somewhere else?” Harper asked.
“Yup. Do me a favor and call ahead to Yellow Church Café. I have the phone number in my notes section. I have it on good authority you love a sandwich called Holy Moley?” Sterling gave her a quick smile before turning his attention back to the road.
“How did you know that?” Harper asked, taking his phone from the dash.
“My code is my birthdate, 07-19-89.”
Harper tapped the code into the screen. “Wow, I have your code... I feel like this is a huge step in our relationship.”
Sterling chuckled, the deep sound welcoming and sexy as hell. “I bled my heart all over you yesterday. Pretty sure that my phone code isn’t as large of step. But if information is important, my blood type is B positive, and I hate needles. My usual passwords are my first dog’s name, which was—”
“Okay, I get it.” Harper laughed. “Nothing to hide. I appreciate that. Now, what do you want to eat? They have a great burger.”
“That’s exactly what I want.”
“Perfect.”
Harper ordered their food, and when they pulled up to the bright yellow building, she waited in the car as Sterling promised to return shortly with their meal.
Sterling came back carrying two paper bags. Heavenly scents filled the air around them as he got into the car and handed the food to Harper. Soon they were driving away.
“So, where to now?”
“The petrified forest,” Sterling replied as he pulled out toward the canyon that led to the Columbia River.
“Ginkgo Petrified Forest? Huh, I’ve actually never been there,” Harper commented.
“Laken told me about it, and it sounded fun. You know, team building while you hold my hand to help me navigate the difficult trails. It’s probably a stupid move, and I might not be able to hike too far, but I’ve heard the view is worth it.” Sterling gave her a wolfish grin.
“Looking for excuses to hold my hand?”
“Yup.”
“Smooth, because you’re limping so badly these days.” Harper rolled her eyes.
“I have a good therapist,” Sterling added with a serious tone.
Harper shook her head. “Yeah, you do. The best.”
“Hotter than hell too.” Sterling gave a low whistle.
“I’ve heard she’s a hardass.”
“Just part of her charm,” Sterling replied.
The rest of the afternoon played out with the same kind of give and take, push and pull. They’d eaten their lunch in the petrified forest parking lot beside the huge dinosaur statue. They’d navigated the trails and crested the hills, offering a fantastic panoramic view of the Columbia River Gorge, and they’d only run into one rattlesnake.
During that time, Harper’s fears had melted away, and she realized that she often still struggled with being herself.
As if she wasn’t enough and needed to play a role.
But not with Sterling. It was natural to actually be real, to make the smartass remarks, flirt, tease—just enjoy life.
It was beautiful.
But most of all, it was healing.
And as the afternoon wound into evening, she was reluctant for it all to end.
“I hope you don’t mind, but I gotta check on a few things back at the ranch before I drop you off. If you’re wanting me to take you home first, I understand, though.”
Harper had her leg tucked under her knee as she lazily caressed Sterling’s hand that she held as they drove back toward Ellensburg.
“That’s fine. I’m in no hurry.” She released a breath of silent relief.
“Laken and Cyler are out of town for the next day, so I’m holding down the fort. I should check on Margaret, and I have to ride out to make sure the gates are all open. We haven’t had any more wind than usual.”
“Welcome to Ellensburg, where the trees grow sideways.” Harper cast him an amused glance.
“Yeah, learning that. It’s been relatively calm today, but I need to check on them regardless.”
“Cyler will make you a rancher yet.”
Sterling chuckled. “Not exactly, but I’m learning different skills, and that’s always a good thing. When he gets back, I think I’m going to see if he needs help on one of his construction crews. I don’t have much experience, but the idea of working with my hands is appealing.”
“I think that’s a good plan,” Harper replied as they turned onto the ranch’s dirt driveway.
“Do you?” Sterling questioned.
She quickly studied his expression. Was he questioning her because he didn’t believe her? Had she misspoken? Yet, as she regarded him, she realized he truly wanted her approval.
Huh.
It was empowering, and it softened her heart in a way she hadn’t anticipated. While she understood, that in many ways, Sterling was broken like she was, it had never occurred to her that he might be insecure as well.
He was confident, powerful, and one of the few people who could probably take her brother in a fight. None of those traits lined up with insecurity.
Yet, there it was.
And she responded to it, as if it echoed in her own soul.
“Sterling, I think you’re pretty much able to do whatever you put your mind to. But you need to find something that you love, that you can throw your energy into, that gives you purpose. You’re more like me than I realized.” She watched the scenery out the window as they pulled up to the house.
“Purpose is necessary,” he added with a grin.
“Exactly. You’re used to working with your hands, and you’re simply trading the M27 for a nail gun. Seems logical.” Harper shrugged, proud of her neat comparison.
“Nicely done.”
“Thank you.” She gave a little head bow as she opened the car door. She glanced to her phone on the dash and made the impulsive decision to leave it. “So, what’s first?”
“Margaret, always Margaret, and then let’s ride out along the pastures on the quads, sound good?”
“Lead away, Captain.”
Sterling paused, his shoulders slightly tense as he turned to her. “Harper, when you call me that, it...”
Harper’s heart seized. Damn, she hadn’t even thought of it, but it had to hurt, being reminded that he wasn’t enlisted any longer. “Sterling, I’m sorry—”
“No”—he held up a hand—“it’s not that. It’s just... Honey, it seriously undermines all the self-control I’m trying to have. Because all I can think of is how you’d sound calling me that when I have you in bed. And I don’t need any help with my imagination, Harper. So, give a guy a break.” He tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear and walked away, his shoulders still tight, stretching the fabric of his T-shirt, offering her a tempting view of the years of hard work to build those muscles.
Damn. Harper blew out a stuttering breath, her heart pounding, her body reacting to his words.
Wanting them to happen so badly it ached.
Down, girl.
She took a calming breath and followed Sterling, purposefully filing away the information for later.
Heaven only knew she’d love to explore that idea...but along with the arousal came a shiver of fear.
Sex equaled pain.
Not at first, but Brock had made their physical relationship one that undermined everything that she had dreamed sex to be.
Pleasure was traded for punishment—and not the kind that was erotic.
The time she should have gloried in her body, she’d been shamed.
When she would have given anything for control, all her dignity had been shredded.
But it will be different with Sterling...right?
She had to believe that, but it didn’t erase the fear.
Control. She had to be in control.
Maybe, if she initiated everything on her terms, her way...
She followed Sterling into the barn, her anxious mood fracturing into a million pieces as she watched Sterling’s careful movements around Margaret.
A laugh escaped her lips. It was so weird that Sterling was still somewhat afraid of horses.
Horses. She trusted them more than most people she’d encountered, yet he couldn’t even walk around one without keeping a wary eye on the poor thing.
“You know they can smell fear.”
Sterling gave her a mock glare. “So I’ve been told.” He disappeared below the fence and then popped back up holding a piece of blue twine from the alfalfa. “I didn’t realize this was still attached when I pitched the damn thing in,” he grumbled.
“You did the right thing, Sterling. I know Cyler appreciates your help.”
He gave her an irritated glance as he slid by her to the stall gate. The poor mare didn’t even seem to care that he was there. She was too interested in her dinner. But Sterling was acting like she was going to bolt and trample him.
She giggled.
He pulled the stall gate shut with a click and walked away, dusting his hands off. “Okay, fences?”
“Fences,” Harper affirmed, still grinning from her residual amusement.
“I know you’re laughing at me. I’m ignoring it,” Sterling grumbled as they closed the barn door and walked around back to where the quads were parked.
“I didn’t say a word.” Harper lifted a hand.
“You didn’t need to,” Sterling replied as he started up his ATV.
Soon, they were passing through the pastures, and Sterling double-checked everything. His whole demeanor was more confident than even two weeks ago. He wasn’t comfortable with horses, yet he got the job done. The guy didn’t really even like cows, but he took care of them well and had learned what he needed to know to do the job right. It was rare to find someone with that kind of dogged determination. It would have been easy for him to wallow in pity, yet he’d risen above it.
The Cowgirl Meets Her Match (Elk Heights Ranch) Page 18