by Shan
“You see that white van that’s leaving now. That’s the Feds. Your boy is under investigation… even after those money laundering charges that you got him and your wife off on a few months back. You would’ve killed him today, the Feds would’ve killed you right after…or even worse, you would’ve been on tape and served the rest of your life in jail.”
“So what, as long as I get the nigga that did to this to Deonna, none of that even matters.”
“What about your daughter? And let me ask you this, is Deonna… your wife even worth all the trouble and misery you’re putting yourself through?”
“What the hell do you mean by that? Of course she’s worth it. Any woman I give my fuckin’ last name to is worth it.”
“The baby that she was pregnant with wasn’t even your baby. The baby’s blood type makes it absolutely impossible, and you know what else? Deonna’s blood type was A; not B like you told me,” Destiny said, and I sucked my teeth, but tried not to let my anger show. This shit with Deonna just seemed to be getting better and better. Just when I was about to sit here and cry like a little bitch over her death, I find out that she was still fucking lying to me. My insides were on fire. I felt myself literally shaking in my seat as sweat started to pour from my forehead. I pushed the button to let the window down to allow some of the air to come inside. I grabbed another Newport from the pack and quickly fired it up. I was only a smoker when I was stressed, and lately, Newports had become an all-time fave, along with the Henny and Goose.
“Maybe, I was wrong then,” I finally said to her.
“No, you wasn’t wrong. You were just lied to. Did she tell you that the Feds were still investigating her after the case was won? She went to them and told them that she wanted to keep her matters with them between her and them. She told them that she would work with them as long as they kept you out of the investigation.”
“Why are you telling me all this now? Not gonna change the fact that I still love my wife, and it’s not gonna make me be with you either.”
Destiny scoffed and reached for the handle of the door. She looked at me before opening and shook her head. The way her eyes hovered over me made me feel like she felt sorry for a nigga, and I didn’t need nobody feeling sorry for me. Choices I made with Deonna were my own, and even if I had been lied to and manipulated, it was my problem and not anyone else’s. Deonna may not have been truthful about some things, but shit, neither was I. We both had our skeletons, and Deonna’s seemed to just so happen to catch up to her a little more sooner than mine would with me.
“There’s so much that you don’t know that I think you should know, but because you think I’m here with ulterior motives rather than the fact that I care ‘bout you and your well-being, then I think it’s just best I let you find out on your own, and that’s if you ever find out. I’ll talk to you another time. Again, I’m sorry for your loss,” Destiny said, as she climbed out of the car and closed the door. I shook my head and called out to her.
“Hey,” I said, once she made it to my side of the car. “I apologize. As you can imagine, it’s a lot for me to take in right now. I appreciate you for this. You just stopped me from fucking up my daughter’s life even further. Let’s find somewhere to have drinks so you can tell me everything that I need to know about my wife,” I told Destiny, and she nodded with a smile. “I’ll follow you.”
Chapter 19
Cuba
“Oh, my God, Khi, just put me down. I can walk,” I said, as Khi placed me onto the floor.
I had just been checked out of the hospital and couldn’t wait to get away from this place. I wanted to crawl up in a bed far away from everyone and cry myself to sleep until I felt better. I still couldn’t believe that someone had poisoned me, and every time I ran those words through my head that the doctor had told me, it still didn’t feel real. I haven’t done shit to anyone, but it was seeming like I would forever get the shit end of the stick.
“You feeling a’ight,” Khi asked me, and I was just annoyed as I shrugged my shoulders and walked to his car. He opened the door for me, and I got in and leaned my head against the window once he closed it. Once Khi got inside, I looked over at him and handed him my phone.
“What’s this?” he asked me.
“The address where I want you to take me to,” I told him.
“A hotel, Cuba?” He dropped my phone into my lap and slid down into his seat.
“Yes, a hotel. I had Tangie book it for me. I can’t go back to her house, and I’m damn sure not going back to where your bitch ass baby mamas at. I knew I should’ve made your ass take me somewhere else when I walked up in there at first. The vibe was just all off, but I put my trust in you and look where it got me.”
“Man, what is wrong with you? You really tripping right now.”
“What’s wrong with me? I’m tripping,” I chuckled, sarcastically. “I just lost my muthafuckin’ child because one of them bitches poisoned me. You asking me what’s wrong with me? No, what the fuck is wrong with you, because I know your dumb ass don’t think you about to sit here and take me back to that house with them bitches?? And I know they still there because your weak ass act like you scared to say fuckin’ no to people!”
“Bitch, you got me fucked up if you think I’m some weak ass nigga. Yo…,Cuba, you better watch how the fuck you…”
I didn’t even let Khi finish before I climbed over the seat and started wailing on him. I couldn’t even see or think straight as tears poured out of my eyes like I had let the floodgates loose. He was supposed to be my man. The man that was supposed to protect and take care of me. That’s what the fuck he told me. That’s what he had promised me. Khi told me to let him take care of me like he’s supposed to do, and I told him okay. I agreed to that shit, and look where the fuck I ended up.
“I hate you! I fuckin’ hate you! I want you to drop me off and leave me the fuck alone, and I’m taking Skylarr with me, because she’s mine! You tried to let Briana come and take her away from me after I was a fuckin’ mother to her, and that bitch doesn’t even care for her, but I do! You too stupid to even see that shit, Khi! You take me to pick her and BJ up, and you stay the fuck away from us. You go run in the got damn sun with Briana since that’s what the fuck you care about so much. Selena’s getting ready to have your baby, but no I had to lose mine,” I screamed, as I mushed Khi in the side of his face.
I went to reach for the door to open it, but Khi popped the locks to keep me in. I took my foot and began kicking the door over and over again. Khi snatched me up from the seat and pulled me out from his side of the car. I swung at him to let me go, but he caught my arm and forced my arms behind my back.
“Man calm your muthafuckin’ ass down before you make me break your muthafuckin’ neck out here,” Khi barked, and I bit down on my bottom lip.
“Let me go, Khi! Just do what I said. Take me to get my babies, and leave me the fuck alone, okay? Just leave me alone.”
“I’m not about to leave you alone! You don’t see that a nigga care about your ass, Cuba! I ain’t never chased a bitch in my muthafuckin’ life, and I damn sure ain’t ever begged one! Then, you putting your muthafuckin’ hands and shit on me! Man, fuck no! I swear, I wanna knock your ass out right now! And I thought I made this shit clear that I don’t give a fuck about no Briana or Selena.”
“Yea, but I betcha they still at that fuckin’ house though! Right? Right, Khi? Answer me,” I screamed, as I tried to break loose from his grasp.
“Because I told them to go back there after they left here yesterday. I haven’t even been back there. I haven’t even said shit to neither one of them,” Khi explained, and I looked up at him like he was crazy.
“So they poison me and cause me to lose my child, and you don’t say anything to them?”
Khi sighed, and let me go. He ran his hand over his face and stepped away from me. I shook my head and walked around to the passenger’s side to grab my phone out of the seat.
“It’s not even wort
h it. Not like I’m ever gonna come first in your life anyway. I don’t have time for this. I’ve been through enough the last few years of my life that I don’t need to even put myself through more behind a nigga that can’t even put me first. This is exactly why I ran so hard from you. You wanna know why I wouldn’t just let go and allow you to love me? That’s because I predicted all of this. I knew it; even when you tried to convince me that I was wrong.”
“Cuba, come here,” Khi said, and I shook my head. I called Tangie’s number and placed my ear to the phone as the line rung. Khi came over and snatched the phone out of my hand and tossed it back inside of the car. “Get in the car.”
“I’ll just have Tangie come and get me and take me to get my babies and take me to the hotel. I don’t need you to do shit for me.”
Khi chuckled. “How the fuck you gonna just take my daughter, though?”
“Who the hell else gonna take care of her nigga while you running in these damn streets?” I asked, with a roll of my damn neck. “Yea exactly, the same bitch that’s been doing the shit since her raggedy ass mama chose to get laced instead.”
Khi sucked his teeth, and I shook my head at him and tried to walk around his ass to grab my phone. That nigga was muthafuckin’ mad, cause I said something about his baby mama. Look at this shit.
“You mad cause I said something about Briana, Khi?”
“I don’t give a fuck about no muthafuckin’ Briana! I don’t give a fuck about that bitch man!” Khi’s voice boomed so loudly across the hospital’s parking lot that I could hear it echoing as if it traveled for what seemed like miles and miles away.
“Prove it then. If you don’t care about her, then prove it, because from where I’m standing, it seems to me that you do.”
“Just get in the car and let’s go. So much shit going on right now, and I’m not about to sit out here in a fuckin’ parking lot arguing with you about shit that don’t even matter. I’m sick of fuckin’ arguing with you about the same shit. Yea, let me get your ass to this muthafuckin’ room. What’s the address again,” Khi said, as he turned around and snatched my phone out of the car. He walked around to get back in the car and got back inside as well. I closed the door and sat back in my seat while staring out of the window.
Khi quickly drove out of the parking lot and practically sped all the way to the hotel with me crying the whole way there. Once we made it to the Hilton Hotel, he helped me out of the car and walked behind me as we went inside. It took them a few minutes to get me checked in, give me a couple of key cards, and point me into the direction of my room.
We walked up to the third floor and down the hall to room 325. Soon as I got inside, I headed straight for the bathroom to shower and get out of my clothes. Thanks to Tangie, I had a couple of things to hold me over until I could get my hands on more of my belongings. When I was done taking care of my hygiene, I exited the bathroom to see that Khi was still here. He was laid across the bed snoring like he hadn’t had any rest in days.
I turned off the light, climbed in the bed, and got underneath the covers, as well. As soon as I rested my head on the pillow, Khi had stood up and stripped out of his clothes. He climbed underneath the covers with me and pulled me into his arms. I wanted to pull away from him, but his touch was what I needed. For some reason, I had felt so alone and like I was being neglected, and I needed for Khi to tell me that I was just being scared and that he was here for me. I needed him to tell me that he could put me first and not allow me to walk away from him.
“I really do care about you, Ma. Why I feel like you about to really leave a nigga, and this time, for good?”
“Because I’m not about to sit back and come second or even third place in your life for a bunch of muthafuckas that mean you no good. You need to stop letting people use you and take advantage of you. Damn. I know you want to be this caring person that looks out for everyone, but some muthafuckas you gotta just turn your back on and let them take care of themselves. I just lost our baby, Khi… Remember how happy you just were about the possibility of having a son, and just that quickly, someone snatched that away from us. And the sad part about it is you’re so busy thinking about how you can protect everyone, make everyone happy, that you don’t even care about how the whole situation makes me feel. You’re protecting someone that hurt me. Do you know how that makes me feel? What if I had died too? Would you still be looking out for them the same way?”
“You’re right. A’ight, you right. I’ll handle it,” Khi said, as he kissed me on the ear. “Man, please, let’s stop fighting. I can’t stand this shit.”
“Neither can I.”
“Promise me this the last time we fight about this shit, and anything else. And I don’t need you to do shit but promise me, because like I said, I’mma handle everything else.”
“I promise,” I told Khi, and he pulled my head back towards him and covered my mouth with his. We stayed like this, kissing and touching on each other for what felt like hours. A tear slid from my face when we had finally let go. This was love, and although it seemed like we were headed down a path of hating each other, I knew that wasn’t so. I knew that we both just had to figure each other out and figure how to love one another the way we were supposed to be loved. I talked so much shit, but this man made me feel so damn good. I couldn’t walk away from that. Why would I walk away from that?
Chapter 20
Khi
I hopped in my car, cranked it up, and headed out of the parking lot of the hotel. This last little blow up with Cuba and hearing how fucking hurt she was touched a nigga deep. She was right man, and it was fucked up that it took me so long to realize it my damn self. I was traveling down the same path with Briana that I had with Dae. She was a grown ass woman just as that nigga was, and I couldn’t be owning their shit for them. That shit was taking a toll on me.
It was time for me to let Briana go just as I had to do with Dae. I would always take care of her, but that shit was gonna have to be from a distance. Without a doubt, my daughter was going to be good as well, especially as long as I had Cuba riding for me. The way she was ready to take on responsibility for my seed like that showed me that I was right to fight for her in the way I had been. I would be a damn fool to let shawty slip away from me, which is why I had to handle my muthafuckin’ business.
It took about thirty minutes to get on the other side of town where I had Briana and Selena’s ass housed. I had only had Selena around so that she can feed me information on her boyfriend, but every time I asked her a question, she would claim that she didn’t know, so it wasn’t like she was of any use to anyway. Everything that I had been finding out lately had been due to my own investigation and putting damn three and four together. Shit was about to get muthafuckin’ real in the field, and I had only needed to figure out a couple of more things before I solved all the pieces to this weird ass puzzle. First things first though… these two broads.
I hopped out of the car and walked inside of the house. Briana had her ass laid across the couch with a cigarette in her mouth, while Selena sat across from her rubbing her stomach and scrunching her face up.
“Hey, baby daddy. Finally, made your way home,” Briana said, and I placed my hands into my pockets.
“This is not my muthafuckin’ home. Yours either,” I said, as I looked down at Briana.
“Yea, yea, yea. That nappy headed ass girlfriend of yours, okay? You sure do know how to pick them.”
“Cut the bullshit, Briana. Which one of you bitches poisoned Cuba?” I asked, hoping that they would be honest with me, but I knew the both of them loved to play games.
“What the hell is you talking about?” Briana sat up and then stood from the couch. She took a pull from her cigarette and then looked at me oddly. I looked from her to Selena and couldn’t read shit. I didn’t know which one of them I wanted to put out first, but I knew both of their asses had to go. Selena looked a little shocked, but not moved. She stood to her feet as well and clutched her stomach.
“Is that what they said? That she was poisoned,” Selena questioned, and I pulled my hands from pockets, but quickly slid them back inside. I gritted down on my teeth and waited for somebody to tell me something.
“She said she had soup…and some Ginger Ale. I told you Selena that she was sick, and you said you knew how to make her feel better. Did you fuckin’ poison my girl, Selena?”
“She did make her some soup and shit. Damn, that’s fucked up,” Briana said, and I charged at Selena.
“You hoe ass bitch!” I yelled, as I grabbed her by her hair and pulled her towards the front door. She screamed and hollered for me to let her go, but all I was seeing was red. I had been avoiding this shit since the day I heard the doctor say that Cuba was poisoned, because I just didn’t wanna deal with this shit. I didn’t wanna believe that one of the women I had laid down with and created a child with could be so muthafuckin’ grimy to purposely kill my seed.
“Khi, I didn’t do anything! I didn’t even know that Cuba came down and got the soup. I told her that I made it, but I didn’t know she’d even eaten it. I fell asleep when she was in the shower and woke up to her tumbling down the stairs!”
“Fuck that! You killed my kid, Selena! You always lying about some shit! Tell the muthafuckin’ truth!” I yelled with so much anger in my heart. I pulled Selena outside of the house and all the way down the sidewalk. I pushed her ass into the street and stepped back away from her.
“I am telling the truth! I would never do that to another woman. You think I would poison a pregnant woman when I’m pregnant too! Khi, don’t do this! What about our daughter? What if Fariq finds me? What about our daughter? You made me stay here to help you, and now, you gonna just throw me on the street,” Selena cried, as she ran towards me. I pushed her back and rushed towards the house.