My First Half (Cate & Kian Book 1)
Page 8
Then he took her hand inside his own, as if he wanted to protect it from any more pain, fingers interlocked, palms pressed tightly together.
“I’m not your boyfriend.”
“I never said you were.”
“You bought me a Valentine’s Day card.”
“I didn’t,” Cate stammered. “How did you know about that?”
“Sinead; she didn’t know it was for me,” Kian turned so that he was facing her. A breeze blew between them and he reached up and brushed her hair away from her face. “It was sweet of you to do that.”
She tried to pull away; this was the conversation she’d been dreading. But he held firmly on to her hand.
“Don’t worry, I haven’t still got it. I ripped it up and threw it in the bin when you didn’t show up.”
“Good,” Kian said, looking down at the ground. “You shouldn’t get involved with me, I’ll hurt you.”
“I don’t think you would,” Cate said honestly.
“I would,” Kian said bitterly. “If you don’t believe me, it’s all there on the internet. Google it.”
Cate moved her bag from between them to the other side of the bench. “I don’t need to Google anything. I’m not some girl you picked up at a nightclub, I know you. I’ve known you my whole life and I trust you. You won’t hurt me.”
Kian met her eyes for a second. She was giving him something so precious, her trust. He didn’t feel worthy. “That’s my point. You’re not some girl I picked up at a nightclub. If I fuck this up, it will have ramifications not just for us but for our families as well. Your brother is my best friend.”
“So don’t mess up then.”
Kian threw his head back and laughed. He pulled her up on to his lap and wrapped an arm around her waist. “If only it was as easy as that.”
Cate reached up and held his face in her hands, his stubble rough against her fingers. She brushed her lips against his, enjoying the way his grip on her waist tightened. “It can be, if you want it to be.”
Kian wanted so badly to believe that were true. He slid his hands inside her denim jacket and held her against his chest. He could feel her beautiful, big heart beating hard against his skin. As much as he’d tried to fight it, he needed Cate. He needed to hold her body against him, to taste the softness of her skin and smell her blackberry shampoo. “I missed you,” he said, muffling his voice in her shoulder.
CHAPTER 10
“What are you doing tomorrow night?”
They were walking back along the path at the side of Mill Lake, having spent the afternoon in the tower. The sky above their heads was navy-blue. The only sounds were their footsteps crunching into the frozen ground. As they walked, the backs of their hands brushed up against each other. Cate turned away to hide her smile as the warmth from his touch radiated up her arm.
Silently, she felt Kian reach for her hand. He intertwined his fingers with hers. She loved the feel of his skin pressed against her own. He slid his thumb underneath the cuff of her jacket, stroking tiny circles on the delicate skin inside her wrist.
Cate looked up at him. He smiled at her; it was a sweet, simple smile that seemed to light up his face. His dark eyes sparkled in the moonlight. There was a chill in the air but Cate was warmed by his touches and his smile.
She thought about his question; wondering where it might lead? She was home alone this weekend; her Mum was in Bromley until Tuesday and Liv had gone to Berlin for Ryan’s birthday.
Kian noticed her frown and stopped, “what is it?”
“I said I’d go and see The Ryders with Sinead tomorrow night.”
“Will you call me afterwards?” Kian asked.
Cate wasn’t concentrating and stumbled on a rock embedded in the path. Kian stopped her from falling.
He led her backwards, out of the moonlight, into the shadows cast by the trees. “Are you OK?”
He stroked her cheek and Cate couldn’t help but lean into his touch. “Don’t you have a match this weekend?”
Kian brushed her hair to one side and gently kissed his favourite spot just below her ear.
“It’s internationals this week,” he murmured, his breath swirling across her damp skin. “I’m still suspended for the next two matches.”
Cate felt her nipples stiffen inside her bra; she hoped that Kian couldn’t feel them.
Kian felt her softness pressed between him and the tree trunk, her beaded nipples poking through her jumper. He wanted to ask her to spend the weekend with him, in his bed but it was too soon, she was too young.
He took a step back, trying to adjust himself so his erection wasn’t quite so obvious.
Cate turned her back, quickly fastening her jacket over her breasts. As her fingertips brushed across her tingling nipples, she felt a flood of warmth between her legs. She was embarrassed by how aroused she was; she’d never felt like this before.
“We should go,” Kian muttered, leading the way back to the moonlit path. Cate followed behind, pressing the backs of her hands against her flushed cheeks, willing her body to calm down. Her heart fluttered like hummingbird wings.
Kian looked down at the ground, willing his cock to behave itself. He didn’t want to scare her away.
They drove back to the library car park in silence. As soon as Cate stopped the car, Kian jumped out. “I’ll call you,” he said quickly.
When Cate came out of the ladies’ toilets after the concert, Sinead was nowhere to be found. Cate stood up on her tiptoes, trying to see Sinead over the top of the crowds.
Her phone buzzed in her hands. “Where are you?” Cate asked, pressing herself back against the wall.
“I’m with Jake,” Sinead giggled.
“But where are you?” Cate tried again.
The phone went dead.
When Cate stepped out of Victoria station into the cold, night air, her phone buzzed again. “Sinead?” Cate couldn’t hide the anger in her voice.
“Close,” Kian’s voice curled around her. “We do share some of the same DNA.”
“Hi” Cate smiled. She leaned back against the wall and let the crowds rush past her.
“You look beautiful,” Kian said softly.
Cate jerked her head up. How did he know? She couldn’t see him.
“Closer,” he guided as her eyes roamed the road outside the Arena.
Suddenly, her face broke out in a wide smile. “There you are.”
“What are you doing here?” Cate asked, racing towards him.
“I wanted to make sure you were safe,” Kian said. “I know what Sinead’s like.”
“You knew she’d ditch me,” Cate asked.
She climbed into the car beside him; he locked the doors but didn’t start the engine straight away. They were hidden by the blacked-out windows. “It wouldn’t be the first time.”
Kian gently held her face in his hands. “You do look beautiful though.”
“Thank you,” Cate blushed.
Kian kissed the tip of her nose, “you don’t take compliments well, do you?”
“It depends if I believe them.”
Kian kissed her tenderly, wanting to make her believe him.
When they got back to her house, he parked the car at the top of the drive. “I thought your Mum never slept.” The house was shrouded in darkness.
Cate looked down at the big, empty house. She hated being home alone. “She doesn’t,” Cate laughed, trying to hide her fear. “She’s, um… she’s not home. She’s in Bromley again.”
Kian tightened his fists on the steering wheel. “What about Liv?”
“She’s gone to Berlin for the weekend with Ryan. It’s his birthday.”
“Come home with me,” Kian suggested. He knew it was a terrible idea; his bollocks were already tight. But he couldn’t just leave her there. Even though she was trying her best to hide it, he could tell that she didn’t want to be alone.
He put his hand on hers and she jumped a little. “I won’t try anything, I swear.”
Kian turned her around so that she was facing him, away from the house. She was still worrying her bottom lip. He stroked the pad of his thumb across her lip, pulling it free from her teeth.
He leaned forward, resting his forehead against hers. “Come home with me.”
“OK,” Cate said softly, her voice no more than a whisper.
Kian pulled back, starting the engine again. That soft whisper wound itself around his head. I wonder what she’ll sound like when she climaxes. Fuck, Kian turned on the radio to distract himself. His cock strained painfully against the zipper of his jeans.
“I love this song,” Cate’s voice broke through his fantasies. It was “Paint it Black” by the Rolling Stones.
“You like the Stones?” Kian asked.
“Why do you look so surprised?” Cate replied.
Kian laughed, “I just picked you up from a Ryders concert.”
“Hey,” Cate protested, “that was your sister’s choice, not mine.”
“Wasn’t your Dad a big Stones fan?” He watched the words hit Cate just as hard as a punch in the stomach.
“I wouldn’t know,” Cate said quietly. “I never met him.”
“I’m sorry,” Kian said. “I shouldn’t have said that.”
“It’s weird,” Cate said, looking out of the car window. “You know more about him than I do.”
“Do you ever think about him?”
Cate laughed bitterly. “It depends who’s asking. If it’s my Mum, no way.”
“If it’s me?”
Cate chewed on her lip again. “Sometimes. I try really hard not to because it hurts too much, you know?”
As they drove down Cooper Lane towards Kian’s house, Cate suddenly panicked. “What about Ben and Erin?”
“It’s fine,” Kian tried to reassure her. “They’re lightweights; they’ll already be tucked up in bed by now.”
“What about tomorrow?”
Kian laughed. “I’ll drive you home. You can sit in the backseat covered by a blanket if you like?”
When they got inside the house, Kian took her coat. “Can I get you anything to drink?”
“I’d love some water,” Cate replied. “Thank you.”
While Kian went into the kitchen to get the water, Cate was drawn to the porch at the back of the house.
“Here you go,” Kian said quietly, not wanting to startle her.
“Thanks,” Cate took a long drink of the water. She needed the cold to calm her down.
“Don’t you ever get lonely?” Cate asked, looking out at the uninterrupted blackness. The house seemed so quiet.
Kian had sat down on the daybed and patted the spot beside him. “Lonely?”
“Yeah,” Cate said. She put her glass on the table and sat down next to him. “In this big, empty house in the middle of nowhere?”
“I like it,” Kian said. “It’s the only place where I can just be me, you know?”
“Plus, I’m not completely by myself. Ben and Erin are just across the courtyard. If it gets too much, I can always gate-crash their plans.”
He looked at Cate, who was still staring out of the windows. “Do you ever get lonely?”
“Sometimes,” Cate said quietly. “Sometimes, there are whole days when nobody looks me in the eye. Mum’s busy; Sinead’s with Jake.”
“Hey,” Kian turned her around so she was facing him. He cupped her chin and lifted it so she had to look at him.
“If you feel like that, will you call me?”
Cate struggled to look away. “I didn’t tell you that so you’d feel sorry for me.”
“I know you didn’t,” Kian’s eyes locked with hers. He gently laid her back on the daybed.
“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured, tracing her jawline with his finger.
Cate blushed; compliments made her uncomfortable.
Kian leaned over her; his dark eyes sparkling in the moonlight. Cate reached up and touched the nape of his neck, his hair was silk through her fingers.
Kian brushed his lips over hers; feeling that crackle of electricity. He felt her unfurl underneath him. Her lips opened for him and he slid his tongue inside.
As their tongues rubbed together, Kian brought his hand up to her breast. He cupped it, feeling the soft flesh in his hand.
Startled, Cate looked up at him. “If you want me to stop,” Kian said softly. “Tell me.”
Cate reached for the back of his head and pulled him back down. He gently kneaded her breasts over her jumper.
Cate pushed him back a little, lifted her jumper up over her head and tossed it to the floor. Kian pulled off his t-shirt and threw it on the floor. Cate couldn’t stop staring at him; in the moonlight, his chest looked so defined. Her mouth was bone-dry. She wanted to run her hands over every inch of him.
“Can I touch you?” He asked softly, kissing the tender spot just behind her ear.
Cate felt her nipples tighten uncomfortably. “Yes,” she said breathlessly.
Kian slid a hand inside her bra, cupping her bare breast. Her skin was warm and smooth as silk. “Fuck,” he growled, feeling his cock jerk inside his trousers.
As he gently squeezed, Cate jumped. “Oh.”
Kian frowned, “do you want me to stop?”
“No,” Cate shook her head. “Please don’t.”
As he kneaded her breast, he felt her breath hitch in her throat. She stretched underneath him, arching her back, pressing her teardrop-shaped breast into his hand.
He kissed her again, swallowing her soft, breathy moans. She was so responsive, he was barely holding on.
He stroked the tight, puckered skin surrounding her taut nipple. Cate whimpered; her breast felt so heavy. Kian watched her reaction as he pressed his thumb and forefinger over the bead of her nipple and firmly tugged on it. “Ah,” she cried, squeezing her eyes tightly closed. Her cheeks were flushed dark pink. As she writhed underneath him, he felt his cock twitch inside his jeans. He was on very dangerous ground.
“Angel, we need to stop,” he murmured, removing his hand from her bra.
Cate looked up at him warily. “I don’t want to take this too far,” he said softly, stroking her cheek.
Cate was embarrassed by how wanton she’d been; taking her top off like that, allowing Kian to touch her bare breast, writhing and moaning underneath him. She could feel hot tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. She wanted desperately to run away. She quickly covered her aching breasts with her arm and tried to sit up. Her nipples were still hard and pressed painfully against the cups of her bra.
“Hey,” Kian said softly, reaching for her hands. “Look at me.”
Cate couldn’t meet his eye. “Please Cate, look at me.”
He tipped her chin up so she had to look at him. “Please don’t be embarrassed. You are so incredibly sexy.”
Cate tried to look down. She didn’t believe him. Her black eyes were glassy with tears. “Why did you stop?”
Kian tried to explain. “If we’d gone any further, I don’t think I would have been able to stop.” Cate looked down at the crotch of his jeans, at the thick bulge of his erection.
“Oh,” Cate blushed even more furiously.
“Angel,” Kian said, gathering her into his arms. He kissed her forehead, her damp eyelids and the tip of her nose. “I know you’re not ready.”
After a few minutes, Kian got up and went into the house. When he came back, he was wearing a black t-shirt and shorts. “Here,” he said, handing Cate a t-shirt and pyjama bottoms. “I thought you might be more comfortable in these. They’re clean.”
“Thanks,” Cate smiled. “Where’s your bathroom?”
When she came back to the porch, Kian was lying on the daybed, underneath a patchwork quilt.
When he saw her standing on the t
hreshold, he sat up. “I thought we could sleep here tonight, if you want?”
“With you?” Cate squeaked.
“Just sleep, I promise,” Kian smiled. “Or I could sleep on the sofa?”
“No, I’d like that,” Cate smiled.
She lay down next to Kian and he covered her with the soft quilt. “This is beautiful,” Cate said.
“My Aunt Sadie makes them,” Kian explained.
“Turn over,” Kian said. Cate turned over on her side so she was facing the window. She felt Kian curl up around her, wrapping his arm around her waist. “Is this OK?”
Cate quickly moved her feet out of the way. “What are you doing?”
“My feet are cold,” Cate explained. “I don’t want to make you jump.”
“Come here,” Kian laughed. He tugged her feet between his calves to warm them up. “Wow, they are cold.”
“Have you brought lots of girls here?” Cate blurted out, before she could stop herself.
“None,” Kian said. “You’re the first.”
“Why not?” Cate asked.
“This is my home,” Kian replied. “It’s the only place where I can really be me.”
“I never wanted to be a professional footballer,” Kian said. He didn’t know why he was telling Cate this. Maybe, she was his truth serum, after all.
“You didn’t?”
“It was my Dad’s dream, not mine,” Kian explained. He felt so comfortable with Cate. “When I was a kid, it was fun. It came naturally to me. I liked being able to play with the older kids. I liked making my Dad proud. It’s just… It was like; well Kian’s good at football so that’s that. The School didn’t really care if I didn’t do my Maths homework as long as we won the Inter Schools Cup. I wish I could have seen what else was out there. Maybe, I’d have been a really great accountant?”
“What about now?” Cate asked. “Turning professional isn’t just about talent, it takes hard work. Has it become your dream?”