by Louise Hall
She bought a ticket for the whole day and put it in the windscreen of her car. It was the school holidays so there were a few families stood near the lake, feeding the ducks.
Cate smiled, thinking about bringing her own child here someday.
Despite what happened back there, she murmured to her stomach, I’m never going to regret having you.
She headed down one of the paths at the side of the lake and eventually found a bench far enough away from anybody. She sat down and pulled out the dusty, crumpled sheet of paper. Her heart hammered inside her chest even though she knew that whatever was printed on it was useless to her. She couldn’t have a baby and go to university and she was keeping her baby so like Zeke said, she didn’t need these results.
But she’d worked hard; she’d practically lived at the library that last month. Was all of that worth nothing? Did nobody care about all the hard work she’d put in now that she was pregnant?
Cate unfolded the sheet of paper and forced herself to look at it. At first she didn’t believe what she’d seen so she read it again and again until it finally sunk in. Cate laughed bitterly. All As, all freaking As. She’d done better than predicted and nobody freaking cared. How many students across the country right now would kill for the grades she’d just got? She couldn’t stop laughing.
A guy walking his dog came over and asked if she was all right.
“Sorry,” Cate said, sobering up a little. “I’ve just got my A Level results.”
“How did you do?” He asked kindly.
“I got four As,” Cate said. It sounded really strange saying it out loud.
“Wow,” the man whistled. “That’s fantastic, congratulations. I bet you’ll be doing some celebrating tonight.”
I doubt it, Cate thought. She smoothed out the creases on the sheet of paper and put it inside her book to keep it safe. As she walked back to the car, she couldn’t stop smiling.
When Kian got home that afternoon, Cate was curled up on the back porch reading. “Hey,” he said softly, brushing her inky-black hair away from her face. He leaned down and kissed her lips tenderly, gently opening them so he could push his tongue inside her warm, wet mouth.
“I like that welcome,” Cate smiled, shuffling backwards so he could lie down next to her on the daybed.
“I’ve got to tell you something,” Kian traced the shell of her ear with his finger, toying with her piercings. “You’re probably not going to like me very much after I tell you.”
Cate had a good idea what it was going to be.
“Sinead,” Kian felt Cate tense up just hearing his sister’s name. “She got her results today, four Cs. I said I’d take her and Mum out to celebrate.”
“OK.” Even though she knew she was being irrational, Cate wanted to ask what about me?
“If you don’t want me to go, just say the word,” Kian kissed the spot just below her ear. He knew her body so well. Cate couldn’t stop herself from melting into him.
“I don’t…” Kian continued kissing down her neck and Cate could hardly catch her breath. He tugged at the neckline of her t-shirt so he could get access to the tendon between her neck and shoulder.
“You were saying?” Kian grinned, looking into his wife’s cloudy black eyes.
Cate put a hand on his chest and pushed him back a little. “I can’t think straight when you’re doing that. I don’t want to come between you and your family.”
“Hey,” Kian frowned. “You’re my family too. You’re my baby mama.”
“I hate that phrase,” Cate tried to push him back some more so she could get up.
“You’re my wife,” Kian said, refusing to budge. He reached down and lifted up her hand, kissing the band wrapped around her finger. “My beautiful, sexy wife and the mother of my unborn child. That better?”
“A little,” Cate conceded.
“If my Dad was still here…” Kian’s voice trailed off. Cate could still see the grief haunting his beautiful brown eyes. She knew it wasn’t what he meant but she couldn’t help the little voice inside her head, which said that if his Dad was still here, they wouldn’t be married or expecting a child together.
Cate held the sides of his face, forcing him to look at her, “it’s OK, I get it.” His Dad’s death had forced him into all these new roles – even though he was Cate’s husband, he was still Sinead’s brother and Jean’s son. If Eamon had still been alive, he would have been so proud of Sinead for passing her A-Levels; he’d definitely have taken her out for a fancy dinner to celebrate. It was only right that Kian wanted to do the same.
“You could come with me?”
Cate shook her head, “it’s Sinead’s night, I don’t want to spoil it.”
After Kian had gone out, Liv called. “I feel like a shit.”
“Why, what’s wrong?” Cate asked.
“No,” Liv said. “I don’t feel like shit, I feel like a shit.”
“Okay,” Cate took a sip of apple juice and pretended it was champagne. “Why?”
“I didn’t wish you luck.”
“It doesn’t matter,” Cate said quickly.
“Yeah, it does,” Liv said. “I’ve got this huge project at work, like overtime-a-go-go and Ryan’s being an arse again but I still should have remembered about today, I’m a shitty sister.”
“You’re not,” Cate smiled. “Don’t beat yourself up about it. It’s not like I’m going to use them for anything.”
“You got them then?” Liv said. “Shit, I’m not interrupting anything, am I?”
Cate looked around the empty kitchen; she was sat at the kitchen counter folding up piles of washing and drinking apple juice out of a champagne flute. “Nope.”
“So how did you do?” Liv asked eagerly.
“I did OK,” Cate said, taking another sip of juice.
“Screw that,” Liv said. “What grades did you get?”
“A,” Cate said nonchalantly.
“That’s fantastic, what else?” Liv said.
“As,” Cate said. “I got all As.” She had to hold the phone away from her ear because Liv screamed so loud.
“I am so freaking proud of you,” Liv said, when she stopped screaming. “So. Freaking. Proud.”
“Thanks,” Cate said.
“So what are you doing to celebrate?” Liv said. “Is Kian taking you out somewhere?”
“I’m going to finish sorting out the washing and then I’m going to have an early night, I’ve got to work tomorrow.”
“You’re shitting me, right?” Liv said. “Where’s that husband of yours?”
“It’s fine,” Cate said.
“Like hell it is,” Liv said. “Where is he? Put him on the phone.”
“He’s gone out,” Cate said.
“Where?”
“Sinead got good results so he and Jean are taking her out for a meal.”
“What about you?” Liv said. “You’re his wife.”
“Don’t be mad at him,” Cate said. The elation had worn off and now she was just tired. “He doesn’t know how I did.”
“Why didn’t you tell him?”
“What’s the point,” Cate said. She told Liv what Zeke had said to her outside college. “He’s right though. It’s not like I’m going to use them for anything.”
“That’s not the point,” Liv said. “You worked your butt off for those results and you deserve to celebrate them. I’ve got an idea… I’m going to make a few calls, don’t go to bed.”
“Liv, it’s fine.”
“Stop saying that, it’s not fine,” Liv said and then hung up.
Half an hour later, Cate heard the doorbell ring. When she opened the door, it was Liv, Erin and Lauren and they were all glammed up.
“Hi,” Cate said, she was still wearing her leggings and shirtdress and felt dowdy in comparison.
“Congratulations,” Erin gave her a big hug.
“Thanks,” Cate said, “but what are you guys doing here?”
“We’re taking y
ou out to celebrate,” Lauren said. “I don’t want to hear another word, get your butt upstairs and get dressed.”
The three of them followed her upstairs and immediately began going through her wardrobe. “What about this?” Liv said, holding up a dress but Lauren wrinkled her nose.
Erin sat down beside Cate on the bed. “I’m sorry about Ben.”
Cate shrugged her shoulders, “it’s fine. He’s hurt, I understand.”
“Here you go,” Lauren said. “Go and put this on.”
“This is where you’re taking us?” Liv asked sceptically, as they stood outside the bar Lauren wanted to go to. “Really?”
“I know it doesn’t look much from the outside,” Lauren said, “but it’s got the most lickable bartender you’ve ever seen.”
“Lickable?” Erin asked, thinking she’d misheard.
“Oh yeah,” Lauren licked her lips, “Lickable. He looks just like Wade from that TV show?”
“Seriously?” Erin asked, her eyes widening.
“Down girl,” Lauren grinned, “I’ve got first dibs on this one. Besides, you’re married.” She looked across at Liv, “what do you reckon; you want to check it out?”
“I was picturing something a bit more…”
“Glamorous?” Lauren asked. “Look, we can go somewhere else, if you really want. My mate’s working the door at Revenge tonight over in Castlefield.”
“Before you decide though…” Lauren pouted. “Spare a thought for my poor cobwebbed lady bits.”
“Your what?” Erin spluttered.
“Seriously,” Lauren said, “I can’t remember the last time I had sex with something that didn’t require batteries.”
“What about Kendo?” Cate asked.
“Gay,” Lauren scowled. “Come on; take pity on your poor single friend. It’s all right for you lot, if we go to Revenge, afterwards you’ll all go back to your lovely hubbies and boyfriends and have the sex. I want the sex; I need the sex with Mr Lickable.”
“Fine,” Liv laughed. “Just be careful if you do take him home that you don’t break him.”
The bar was quiet and they easily found a booth towards the back, far enough away from the DJ. “There he is,” Lauren almost squealed, as Mr Lickable casually flipped up the top and stepped behind the bar.
“Ooh,” Erin said, “he looks exactly like Wade.”
“Put your tongue back in missy,” Lauren teased. She added another coat of lip-gloss and fluffed up her hair. “What do you think?”
“Go get him, tiger,” Liv gave her the thumbs-up.
When Lauren came back from the bar, Mr Lickable was in tow, carrying their tray of drinks. “Ladies,” he grinned, flashing his pearly white teeth. “I’m Zane; let me know if you need anything.”
“I think Lauren needs something,” Liv piped up.
“Oh yeah,” Zane folded his arms across his chest. “And which one of you lovely ladies is Lauren?”
“That’d be me,” Lauren blushed.
“What can I do for you, Lauren?”
“She’s got cobwebs,” Liv giggled. Lauren glared at her.
“Cobwebs, huh?” Zane raised an eyebrow. “Whereabouts?”
“Kill me now,” Lauren muttered under her breath. “They’re in my… bedroom.” She said the 1st place she could think of.
“I tell you what,” Zane leaned in to Lauren. “I finish here at 11, if you stick around, maybe I can help you do something about those cobwebs.”
“Oh my goodness,” Erin squealed after Zane had gone back behind the bar. “You are so in there, he wants to see your cobwebs.”
“From your mouth to God’s ears,” Lauren grinned, looking up at the ceiling. “I bloody hope so, I’ve run out of batteries.”
“Let’s have a toast,” Liv announced, raising her glass. “To my incredibly swotty little sister and her kick-ass A Level results.”
“Thanks,” Cate blushed, sipping her J20.
“Open your present,” Liv said, putting a large black box on the table.
Cate was embarrassed. “You didn’t need to buy me anything.”
“Open it,” Liv urged. “Do it,” she repeated, slapping her hands on the table.
Cate opened the lid of the box and peeled back the layers of hot-pink tissue paper. “What the…?”
“What is it?” Erin asked eagerly, looking over Cate’s shoulder. “Oh.”
Cate quickly covered it up with tissue paper and put the lid firmly back on the box.
“What was it?” Lauren asked Liv.
“A vibrator,” Liv replied.
Cate pushed the box back towards Liv. “Thanks for the… you know but you can have it back.”
“You’re keeping it,” Liv said, pushing the box back towards Cate. “I bought it you for 4 reasons. Firstly, it’s purple which I know is your favourite colour.”
Cate rolled her eyes.
“Secondly, every woman should have one. I’ve got two,” Liv said proudly. “Erin?”
Erin blushed bright red, “just one,” she squeaked.
“You already know I’ve got a collection of them,” Lauren smiled. “It depends on my mood.”
“See,” Liv nudged Cate, “it’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I bet even Mum’s got one.”
“Ew,” Cate covered her face with her hands. “I don’t want to think about that.”
“The top drawer of her bedside table is always locked – what the heck do you think she keeps in there?”
“Third, I thought since your husband’s being such a dick, I might as well buy you one.”
“I’m going to kill you,” Cate scowled at her sister. She quickly looked around to make sure that nobody was listening in to their conversation. “He’s not that bad.”
“Where is he then?” Liv said, looking around. “Is he with his wife celebrating her kick-ass A Level results?”
“It’s complicated.”
“It’s not complicated, he’s a dick,” Liv said. “Finally…”
“Oh, thank goodness,” Cate sighed.
“When your husband’s not being a dick, he’s away a lot. Remy said she’s never been as horny as she was when she was pregnant with Rocco and Luca so this way if you get the urge and hubby’s away, you can take care of yourself.”
“You talked to Remy about this?”
“Course I did,” Liv giggled. “She paid half.”
“What’s so funny?” Nick grinned, as he walked up to the table.
“Nicky,” Liv kissed his cheeks. “Where have you been?”
“I had to lock up the Tavern,” Nick smiled, removing Liv’s arms from around his neck. “How many have you had?”
“She’s up the duff,” Liv said, jerking her head at Cate, “so I’m drinking for two.”
Lauren picked up the empty bottle, “I’ll get us some more drinks.”
“Bad Romance” by Lady Gaga came on and Liv quickly stood up, “it’s my song. Erin, dance with me.” Erin grimaced as Liv grabbed her hand and pulled her into the centre of the dance floor. “Cate, why don’t you show Nicky your present?”
Cate shot her sister a filthy look, pushing the box to the other side of the booth.
“What’s she talking about?” Nick asked, raising an eyebrow.
“It’s nothing,” Cate blushed furiously. “She’s drunk.”
Nick took Liv’s place next to Cate in the booth. His aftershave was so strong, Cate tried really hard not to gag. “So, how did you do?”
“I got, um, 4 A’s,” Cate admitted, blushing.
“That’s awesome,” Nick said, hugging her. Cate wasn’t sure if she was reading too much into it but the hug seemed to go on forever; she could feel his warm breath on the side of her neck. She was glad when Erin came back to the table.
“Phew,” Erin lay back on the booth, resting her head on the cardboard box. “Your sister’s crazy.”
They looked over at Liv who was dancing wildly, her arms and legs flailing. “I’m a freak,” she yelled.
&
nbsp; “She’s definitely that,” a stocky, shaven-headed bloke said as he walked past the table. “I’d give her one though.”
“Look how drunk she is,” his mate leered. “I bet she wouldn’t put up much of a fight either.”
Cate felt sick; listening to those guys talking about her sister like that. Nick put a hand on her arm. “You stay here, I’ll go.”
“Did you hear that?” Cate asked Erin. “Erin?”
When she looked across, Erin was curled up on the bench with her eyes closed. Cate prodded her side and Erin quickly opened her eyes. “What?”
“Did you just fall asleep?”
Erin looked guilty. “I’m sorry. I know it’s your big night and I really want to celebrate with you but I’m absolutely pooped.”
“It’s fine,” Cate said. “You don’t have to stay out all night.”
“I don’t mind,” Erin protested. Cate could tell that she was really tired and wanted to go home.
“Go,” Cate got up and pulled Erin to her feet.
“Do you want me to give you a lift home?”
Cate was about to answer when the sound of breaking glass filled the air. “What did you just call me?” Liv squared up to another girl on the dance floor. “I’ll snap you like a twig.”
“I’d better stay with Liv.”
Erin squeezed Cate’s hand. “Nick can take care of her.”
That’s true, Cate thought but she didn’t trust him – her sister was so drunk. She told Erin to go home. “I’ll put this in the boot of my car,” Erin blushed, picking up Cate’s “present.”
After Erin had gone, Cate tried to drag Liv back to their booth. “No,” Liv shook her head. “I’m having too much fun here. Dance with me.”
“Come on, don’t be a spoilsport,” Liv grabbed Cate by the hand, pulling her further into the centre of the dance floor. Cate really wanted to go home. She could feel everybody looking at them and not in a good way. Liv wouldn’t let go of her hand so Cate had to stand there while Liv danced around her. She looked around for Lauren but she and Mr Lickable had both disappeared. Nick was stood at the bar with a bottle of beer in his hand watching them.
Eventually Cate had enough. She wasn’t used to wearing heels and her feet were sore. It was a work night so as it got later and later the crowd started to thin out and Cate wasn’t sure she liked the people that were left.