by Ella Miles
“I’m not asking me to believe me. I’m asking you to believe yourself.”
She bites her lip.
“You already know it wasn’t me that raped you. You just said it was pretty great when I fucked you. Although, I’m sure it was far better than pretty great.”
She blushes and sits back in her chair like she’s trying to hide.
“Do you think if I had raped you, sex with me would have felt that amazing?”
She doesn’t answer.
“Do you think you would have wanted to have had sex with me if deep down you truly believed I had raped you?”
Nothing.
“Do you believe I’m capable of raping you?”
She glances back up at me. “No, I don’t think you raped me. I don’t think you’ve raped anyone or are capable of rape.”
My lips twitch. If she only knew the truth, she wouldn’t be saying I’m not capable. But as much as I wanted to, I never touched her without her permission.
“I just can’t make sense of what I remember,” she says, staring down at her french toast again as she uses her fork to move the food around on her plate before taking a bite.
“Is it possible it was another fantasy? That whoever was hurting you was too much for you? So you changed the image of the man hurting you to me, so it was easier for you to take?”
She nods. “It’s possible.”
“If you need, Adela can find the security tapes and try to find the tape of the rape you are talking about. If it will help.”
She nods. “I’ll think about it.”
I nod. I’m sure Adela has already scanned the images in her head and found the exact instance Gia told me about earlier.
But it will be tough for Gia to watch. It was impossible for me to watch without punching the display.
Gia finishes every bite of her breakfast, to my surprise. “This is better than Michi’s.” She pauses. “But don’t tell him I said that; he’d be crushed.”
I chuckle. “Don’t worry, Michi will love you no matter if he finds out you prefer my cooking to his or not.”
Gia’s eyes warm as she wipes her red lips with a napkin.
“So what now?” she asks.
I raise an eyebrow. “I’m not sure what you mean?”
“When will you let me go? It’s clear you aren’t the monster you said you are. When will I be free?”
I sigh. “I’m still the monster, Gia. Just not the same monster Dante is. You’ll figure out my darkness soon enough.”
“When will I be free?”
“Never.”
Her hope drops. “Why? Why not just let me go?”
“I can’t.”
“Why?”
“The why doesn’t change what is. You will never be free. So start finding ways to enjoy your life here with Michi, Adela, and me. You enjoy your books. We can get you more and—”
“No, I am not your captive.”
I smirk. “It seems like you are.”
She crosses her arms stubbornly. “I won’t have sex with you again. You will have to rape me.” Her voice is defiant, but her eyes are half filled with lust. She can’t hold out. She needs sex with me as much as she needs air to breathe.
I lean forward and sweep a hair off her face. She doesn’t move, but her eyes fill higher and higher until I know she is imagining me naked.
“I think you can be persuaded."
11
Gia
Caspian is so confusing.
He’s sweet and charming. He’s menacing and a liar. He’s truthful. He’s every personality that has ever existed. And it turns me on and pisses me off at the same time. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. But I can’t live like this. I need to know what he wants with me, other than sex. The sex is amazing, but it won’t last. He will get bored with me. So why keep me forever?
Above everything, he’s kinder than he thinks. He’s saved me more times then he realizes. I just wish I could break through his control and figure out what’s going on in his head. He’s so careful with what he tells me I think he could point back to always telling me the truth, but he’s clearly hiding something. A lot of things, actually.
There is only one bad thing he’s ever really done. Denied me my freedom.
I know now he never raped me. I trust his words. I trust Adela, even though I’m pretty sure I’ll want her to show me the video later. I need to know what happened to me when my mind was weakened. But after having sex with Caspian, I know he didn’t rape me. That’s one line I don’t believe he would cross. At least not with me.
I haven’t moved from my chair on the balcony after Caspian left. I finished my coffee almost an hour ago, but I can’t bring myself to go inside and get another coffee. The warm sun is too cozy to leave, even for a minute. And when I go back inside, it means this is real. I’m his captive. He saved me to make me his.
Forever.
That’s the word he used. Forever.
I just have to figure out to change forever to a month. I could use a month longer healing here. Hiding out from Dante where it’s safe, and fucking Caspian whenever I get a chance. Then, when the month is up, I could seek my revenge. I’d be strong enough by then, and have Caspian out of my system.
But then what? What life would I go back to? The aunt who doesn’t have a life of her own? Who has never had a life of her own? I’ll worry about that once I get out of here. First, I need to get Caspian to agree to my plan.
I jump up, now that I have a plan. I can agree to all his darkest sexual fantasies, in agreement for him letting me go in one month. He won’t be able to resist. If I’m here any longer than that, I will just become a headache or a liability. At least that’s what I convince myself my argument is as I race inside his small cabin.
I listen, trying to hear where he or Adela is. I look down at the couch that is now stretched into a bed where Adela must have slept. But I don’t see any other sign of her.
I do smell coffee. I can’t resist getting another cup. I assume I will find Michi in the kitchen, but he’s gone. Adela or Caspian can’t be far away. Someone must have refreshed the coffee recently. I pour myself the steaming liquid gold and then walk through the house.
It takes me all of two minutes to walk through the entire house. I will never understand why he has such a small house. He must have another house somewhere else. He might even have a family, a wife, children he is hiding from me.
No one is in the house.
I consider my next move. Could I run?
My leg is mostly healed. Enough that I could walk, or even jog, for miles. No one is here to stop me.
I know Caspian has a security system. Is one of his employees watching me right now?
I sigh.
I’ll try running if my plan fails. I’m safe. Caspian won’t hurt me. Dante doesn’t know I’m here. And I can keep having mind-blowing sex. My life could be worse at the moment.
Still…
I move to the front door and rest my hand on the door handle. What would happen if I opened the door?
My pulse raises with anticipation. I bite my lip as I grin. I like playing devil’s advocate too much.
I turn the knob, surprised the door even opens. And then I step out on the small porch of the cabin. Nothing happens. No alarms sound. No men come racing out of the bushes to pull me back inside. Maybe Caspian was lying about the security?
I sigh. He’s not lying. Just not telling the whole truth. He knows I’m out here.
I walk down the three steps and sit on the bottom step, my feet hitting the gravel outside of the house for the first time since I arrived. I sip my coffee and wait.
I don’t have to wait long. Five minutes later, maybe, I see Caspian running up the drive. Shirtless.
My mouth falls open seeing his rippling muscles contract. I lift my cup of coffee to my mouth to cover my gaping. I glance over at the side of the house and realize his car has been here the whole time. I could have searched for his keys and tried to es
cape.
He would have found me. I’m sure his car has a GPS system.
I turn back to the gorgeous man sparkling under the sun reflecting off of his glistening skin.
Damn, maybe I should agree to stay for two months. I could stay locked up in this tiny cabin if it meant two months of fucking him.
“You wouldn’t be trying to escape, would you?” he asks.
“Nope, just drinking my coffee on the front porch.” I take a sip of my coffee to prove my point.
“You don’t listen to music when you run?” I ask, noticing he doesn’t have any earbuds in.
“No need. I have voices in my head far too often. I prefer to run alone.”
I narrow my eyes. “What does that mean?”
Caspian stretches his arms over his head, and my insides are putty. My nipples perk up, thinking they are about to get attention. And my core burns with desire.
He shrugs. “I have earbuds in often to communicate with my security teams. I prefer to be alone when I run.”
I nod. That makes sense. But again, I get the feeling that although it’s true, it’s not the reason he doesn’t listen to music.
“I have a proposition for you,” I say, letting the previous topic go.
He bends down, stretching at the waist. “So you were trying to escape. Just with propositions this time, instead of running.”
I frown. “How do you know what my proposition is about?”
He straightens. “Because I know you. “
I pout. “No, you don’t.”
He cocks his head to the side. “You’re Gia Carini. Third born. You are the child your mother thought would save her marriage to your father. She was wrong.
“You weren’t exactly neglected as a child, but you were not praised like your brothers. You never fully belonged in their world. You were just one more child to split the inheritance with.
“You just floated by in school. Never really pushing yourself, but getting mostly A’s all the same. You never went to college, didn’t even apply. Why would you? You are the beautiful woman your family uses to distract other men when it suits them.
“And then you met a man, Roman. You thought he was different. He could give you a real life. A purpose. So you fell in love, and now you’re here. How I’d do?”
I set my coffee cup down on the step before I stand calmly. “Like you had Adela do a background check on me and figure out the basics. That doesn’t mean you know me.”
He takes a step closer to me, closing the already tiny gap and setting off an electrical pulse. It starts off slow, as his hand grazes my fingertips accidentally, and then races faster as it hits every major nerve in my body.
“You’re incredibly stubborn. You won’t take no for an answer. You hate to be controlled. You’re naïve. You’re a bit of a princess who is used to other people taking care of them. Your beauty has gotten you far in life.”
I glare at him, hating where he is going with this.
“But you are also an incredibly strong, intelligent, and fierce woman. One that could put me on my knees with one word. That’s how I know you what you are about to propose.”
He’s right. He knows me better than I want him too.
“And that’s why I’m not going to stick around and listen to it.”
“What?” the word slips out of my mouth more in shock than an actual question. He slips by me, jogging inside.
It takes a second for the shock to wear off and the annoyance to set in. He will too listen to me.
I stomp inside, not even bothering to pick up my coffee mug. I slam the door behind me and then I listen, waiting to figure out where Caspian went.
Shower. I can hear the water on. I smile; the benefits of having a small home.
I take loud steps, making my presence known as I make my way to the bathroom.
Caspian has kicked off his running shoes and is standing in the bathroom with the water running. He sees me, smirks, pushes down his running shorts and flicks them in my direction before stepping into the shower.
I gape for a second as his body disappears behind the glass doors.
“Caspian! You don’t get to end a conversation like that!” I yell when I regain my composure.
He ignores me and grabs the bottle of shampoo.
He doesn’t get to win without even hearing me out.
I stomp to the shower door and throw it open. “Talk to me, damn it!”
Nothing. He pretends I’m not even here. He massages the cream colored liquid into his hair until it begins to lather.
I don’t think. I want him to talk to me, and this is the only way I know how. I rip the clothes off my body and step into the shower.
He continues to ignore that I’m here. Instead, he tilts his head back and closes his eyes as he rinses the shampoo. I stop thinking for a moment while I watch the suds drip down his hard chest.
I shake my head, forcing myself to focus.
“Look at me, Conti!” I yell.
He finally does with an amused expression.
“Yes?”
Damn, I can’t think. All I can do is stare at his lips. I forgot how inviting they are. I want him pressed against mine. And then sucking on every sensitive part of my body.
No.
Focus.
“I want to make a deal. You don’t want me here forever. I’m a liability. I’ll drive you mad. It’s clear you are a loner.”
He shrugs. But he’s listening closely.
“Let me go in two months. I mean, one month. You can have me for one month. Do anything you want. All those dirty thoughts floating around in your head can be a reality. For one month. Then let me go. You don’t want the trouble I bring anyway.”
He leans forward until his lips brush against mine, the water dripping down his face and rolling onto mine. I shiver.
“No.”
My heart stops. He said no, but I don’t care about his answer. I care about what I want. I want sex.
My lips close the gap, needing his lips on mine. He doesn’t hesitate. He kisses back with the force of the universe pushing us together. I don’t understand the attraction between us. It’s not like the attraction between Roman and me. This is different. Very, very different. It’s all-consuming.
I can’t think about escaping when I want to go deeper into his abyss. I want him more and more until I no longer feel like myself except when our lips are locked. I’ve never felt like myself until now.
I should have learned my lesson. Relying on a guy to make me whole is what landed me in trouble. I was raped and abused because I trusted a man with more than he had earned. But Caspian saved me. He’s not evil. And it’s just sex.
The sex will eventually get boring. We aren’t together. We aren’t a couple. Eventually, Caspian will let me go. And then I can find my own life, without a man.
“What do you want, Gia?” he asks as he presses me against the back of the shower. The cold tile presses against my back. He’s asking if I still want my freedom. How can I say it’s what I want when all I can think about is his body? I’m not sure when I will be ready to give him up. One month won’t be long enough. I don’t even know if two months would be long enough.
“Freedom, I want freedom. I just don’t know how to get it,” I whisper.
“I do. Let me take you away from everything.” He doesn’t wait for me to respond. He kisses down my neck as he palms my breast. I’ve never had shower sex. Never felt the slick water racing down my face. Never been with a man who is half monster and half angel.
But that is exactly who Caspian is.
My body comes alive under his touch. I forget about everything but him. He’s right that it feels a lot like freedom. At least it does in my head, even if my body isn’t really free.
His eyes rage with lust as I writhe under his touch.
“You have the body of a princess,” he says, lowering how mouth to my nipple to lick the sensitive bud.
I arch my back, needing more of the flickering
he’s doing with his tongue.
“And the heart of a warrior.” He releases his latch and sinks his hand between my legs. He hits my favorite spot without even trying.
I see the look of something darker in his eyes. He wants more than what he’s about to do to me. This time is for me. But if I want to win this game we are playing, I will have to give into his desires. Is he as twisted as Dante?
No, but he said he was worse. I still don’t know what that means, but I plan on figuring it out.
Right now though, I just need the release of freedom he promised.
His cock pushes into my stomach, and I ache to have him inside me.
But he’s patient. As much as my body presses against his, needing to feel his slick length inside me, he won’t let me until he says so. He may not seek everything he wants when he’s with me, but he still has the control.
“Come, Gia,” he commands as his fingers slide inside my slit while his thumb presses the button to build me.
“Conti!” I cry as an orgasm rolls through me.
His eyes blaze as he watches me follow his command. I pant for several seconds, trying to get my hold on reality again.
“How do you do that?” I ask breathing slightly more regularly, but his hand is still buried inside me.
“The question you should be asking is why. Why do I do that when I should be punishing you?”
“But—”
I don’t get to speak. His mouth covers mine, taking my voice and any thoughts with me.
His cock replaces his fingers inside me, stretching me to my brink. He pumps quickly in and out of me, not giving either of us time to say anything to each other.
He lifts my legs up, and I dig them into his back as my hand grips his neck, holding on for my life as he moves us faster and faster.
“I can’t,” I cry, knowing his body is begging me to orgasm again, but there is no way my body can handle that again so soon.
Caspian stills, and strokes my face, running his thumb across my bottom lip. He smiles sweetly, even though his cock is still inside me. There is nothing sweet about Caspian.
“Beautiful,” he says simply.
I blush at the simple compliment I wasn’t expecting in the midst of quick shower sex.