“I’ve missed you so much,” I whispered against her skin, and sucked on that sensitive spot behind her ear. “Forgive me, Rachel.”
Her breath hitched as I made my way back to her lips. They trembled against mine and I opened my eyes.
“Babe, why are you crying?” I brushed the tears away and held her face in my hands.
“I don’t know.” A sound that was half laugh and half sob left her. “I feel like I’m being ridiculous right now, but I’m just happy. I feel like everything is right again. God, that sounds so stupid and cliché.”
“You’re not being ridiculous.” I kissed her forehead before brushing my lips against her cheek to catch more tears. “And you’re right, that is pretty cliché.” She laughed and pushed against my chest. I just smiled and kissed her nose. “But I feel the exact same way.” Pressing my lips to hers once more, I rolled to the side and pulled her so she was facing me. “My name is Logan Ryan, but everyone calls me Kash,” I said, and she laughed softly. “I was born and raised in Tampa Bay, Florida, and for almost four and a half years now I’ve worked in law enforcement. I’ll be twenty-six soon and don’t have any siblings. I’ll do just about anything for pancakes and green Sour Patch Kids.” She smiled and I stroked her jaw with my thumb. “And I will do anything to make sure I never lose you again.”
“My name is Rachel Lynn Masters, I’m twenty-one, and I’m from Yorba Linda, California . . . formerly known as far West Texas.” She winked and wiggled closer to me. For a few moments she just looked at me before taking a big breath and laying the rest of it out there. “I don’t know what I want to do for the rest of my life, but I know that whatever it is, I want to do it with you.” Closing the distance between us, she kissed me softly and spoke against my mouth. “I forgive you, but no more lies.”
“None.”
She leaned away and propped herself up on an elbow. “I’m serious, Kash. Not even the forgiving lies to save me from getting my feelings hurt. If I ask you if my butt looks big, you can’t lie.”
“Woman, you barely even have an ass. That was the worst example you could have used.”
Rachel grinned wryly and launched herself at me. Rolling so she was on top of me, I pulled her close and kissed her deeply. She groaned when I nipped at her bottom lip and I reveled in the taste of her.
I’d missed everything about her, and I wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of the night worshipping her body, but I couldn’t believe that she was even here, and I didn’t want to push anything. Forcing my hands to stay on her hips was damn hard, but she was calling the shots right now.
She dragged her teeth against my jaw, and my fingers flexed on her hips. She laughed low before whispering in my ear, “I need you. Now. Stop holding back.”
No need to tell me twice. I flipped us over so her back was to the bed, grabbed the bottom of her shirt, and yanked it off her body. My hands went to the button on her jeans and my mouth went to her right, lace-covered breast at the same time she pulled my undershirt off me and attacked my belt.
Worshipping her was going to have to wait until later. I didn’t have the patience for that just yet.
I finally got the button and zipper undone and had just started pulling off her jeans when I saw it and I wanted to die. “God, Rach.” My body froze and one of my hands slowly came up to trace the scars covering her stomach. “I’m sor—”
“Don’t. It’s not your fault.” Her hands left my hips and cupped my cheeks, pulling my head up to look into her beautifully pained blue eyes. “Okay?”
Shaking my head, I kissed the inside of her wrist and pulled it back when I remembered. I looked at the long scar running up her wrist and let my lips trail the length of it before grabbing her other arm and doing the same. “Rachel, you’re beautiful,” I said softly, and leaned down to kiss the scarred word above her left breast. “And I love you.” Crawling farther down, I kissed every inch of the scars on her stomach and vowed, “Somehow, I will make up for every mark he ever put on your body.”
Frenzied passion forgotten, I spent the rest of the night loving and worshipping every part of her.
Rachel
I SLIPPED OUT of Kash’s bed and tiptoed around his room looking for my clothes, which had been thrown around last night. My eyes landed on the midnight-blue button-down shirt he’d been wearing when he walked in and I shrugged into it, buttoning only a few of the middle buttons. I walked back over to the bed, kissed his cheek, and quietly walked out into the living room, shutting his bedroom door behind me.
After walking into Mason’s empty room and grabbing my purse, I pulled out my phone and decided against checking the dozens of texts and voice mails Candice had left, and called her instead.
“Mmm ’lo?”
I looked at the clock in the kitchen and figured it was almost eight in California. “Sorry for waking you, Candi.”
She gasped and I heard rustling. “No, no. It’s fine, I’ve been waiting for you to call. Tell me everything— Wait. What time is it?!” I heard her counting, “Almost eleven there? Does that mean it went well?”
A blush stained my cheeks and I bit back a smile. “Yeah, you could say that.”
“I knew it would!” she squealed. “So you guys are back together? Did you tell him you want to move there?”
“Ah, no, I didn’t exactly say those words. But I will today. I’m pretty sure from how it went last night it was kind of assumed I want to be here with him.” After searching through all the cabinets, I finally found the skillet and pulled it out, but a bunch of the pans in there clanked together. “Shit. Shh.” I winced and hushed the pots and pans.
“What are you doing?” Candice whispered, like she needed to be quiet too.
“I’m making pancakes. But Kash is still asleep.”
“Pfft. Figures. He should be making you pancakes.”
I paused with my hand on the pancake mix and thought back over everything Kash had done for me last night. “That man definitely deserves pancakes.” My voice got breathy and a huge smile crossed my face.
“Tell. Me. Everything!”
“Do I, now?” a husky voice asked from behind me.
I gasped and whirled around to face Kash, who was looking sexier than any man had a right to in nothing but a pair of gray boxer-briefs.
“Candice . . . ,” I said.
“Go! Go, and call me later. I want details! Love you.”
“Love you back.” I had barely pressed the end button when Kash pushed me up against the counter and claimed my mouth. “Morning.” I giggled against his lips when he lifted me onto the counter.
“You weren’t there when I woke up,” he said, and ran his hands over my bare thighs.
“I wanted to make you breakfast.”
“I can see that. Lie back, Rachel.”
My eyes widened but I didn’t say anything as he gently pushed me back until I was lying on the counter, my legs hanging off the end. When he spread my legs farther and I felt his breath on me, my heart instantly sped up and then began skipping beats when he hooked my legs over his shoulders.
“Kash!” I gasped and my back tried to arch off the granite when he swiped his tongue against me in one long stroke. He laughed softly against me and the things the vibrations did to me were almost enough to send me over the edge right then. My body heated and the knot in my lower stomach tightened as he continued to work me with his tongue, and just as I began shivering in anticipation, he added his fingers and my body shattered.
He rode me through my orgasm, and when my body fell limp, he gently lowered my legs, sat me up, and scooted me to the very edge of the counter before filling me with his length. I hadn’t even realized he’d taken his boxer-briefs off. I cried out and wrapped my arms around his shoulders to attempt to hold on as he teased me by alternating between slow and gentle strokes, and slamming into me hard and fast, over and over again. When that familiar tightening started low in my stomach, I begged him to go faster and growled in frustration when he woul
d get me as close to the edge as possible and then back off completely. I caught sight of his wicked grin and vowed to return the favor. Soon. Resting his forehead against my neck, he quickened and held his pace as my fingernails dug into his back. A pleasured scream started tearing through my chest as I crashed down around him and I bit down on his shoulder to muffle any other noises I might make as he continued to drive into me until he found his release inside me.
We stayed just like that as our breathing returned to normal, and Kash peppered my neck and throat with soft kisses. “Amazing breakfast, babe.”
I laughed but quickly broke off when I felt it where I was aching from the multiple orgasms I’d had last night and this morning. “Smart-ass.”
“Go wash up, I’ll clean the counter.”
When I came back out to the kitchen, he was just about to pour some pancake batter on the skillet. Smiling widely at me, he sat the bowl back down and pulled me into his arms before placing a kiss on my jaw and lips. “We need to talk about a few things.”
I raised an eyebrow at him and wrapped my arms around his narrow hips. “Do we?”
“Now that you’re healing from your parents’ death, do you want to be in California?” I shook my head and he continued. “Then will you move here to be with me?”
“I’d, uh, already kind of planned on it.”
“All right.” He huffed a soft laugh. “We’ll start looking for a place for just us. And I want this time to be different for us, Rach. I love you more now than I did before, but I’m going to wait until I know you’re ready before I ask you again. I just need you to know now that I do plan on marrying you; that has not changed for me at all.”
“ ’Kay.” I smiled at him and wiggled closer.
“I want you to meet my parents . . . today or tomorrow, it doesn’t matter, but soon. I know they’ll love you.”
My heart started racing and I nodded my head against his chest.
“Every day for the rest of our lives, I want you to spend the mornings in nothing but my shirt.” I laughed and he tightened his arms around me. “And we really need to talk about getting you on birth control. Because after last night and this morning, I don’t know how I could ever go back to using a condom with you.”
“But I am on birth control.”
He jerked his head back and tilted mine up to look at him, his brow furrowed. “Then why am I always wearing one?”
I shrugged. “Neither is one hundred percent effective, and since Candice was always with guys I made her use both so she wouldn’t have mini Candices running around. I guess my own argument just followed me.”
His scowl deepened. “Do you want to marry me?”
“Yes.”
“Do you want to have kids with me?”
“Someday,” I whispered.
“Do you ever miss taking your pill?”
“Never.”
His gray eyes turned silver and the heat in them warmed my body. “Bed. Now. We’re never using condoms again.”
“Pancakes?” I argued miserably.
He turned off the skillet, put the batter in the fridge, and pointed in the direction of his bedroom. “We’ll make them later. Go.”
“But—”
“Woman, I just found out that you’ve been on the Pill this whole time. Right now I’m struggling not to spank the hell out of you. Last time I’m going to tell you.” He leaned in close and ordered gruffly, “Bed, Rachel. Now.”
Goose bumps covered my skin and a pleasant shiver made its way through my body as I turned to leave the kitchen. I’d barely made it two steps when his hand came down across my butt, which was still covered in his shirt. “Whoa!” I yelled, and covered myself with my hands as I turned to face him. “Ow! That hurt, you jerk!” I went to smack him but he caught my hand and smiled as he kissed my palm.
“Don’t lie, Sour Patch, you enjoyed it.” When he lifted me up, I automatically wrapped my legs around his hips and let him walk me back to the bedroom. “And you’re gonna get another one for making me take you to the bed.”
I didn’t even try to argue. The way his heated eyes mixed with that arrogant smile I’d fallen in love with made for one delicious combination. And I decided right then that I liked this side of Kash.
Epilogue
Four months later . . .
Kash
“YOU GOOD?” I asked Mason as we headed back toward the elevators.
He shrugged and punched at the buttons on the wall. “There’s only so much you can do to get them to go in a different direction. He wanted to follow his brother.”
We’d gotten a call late last night from homicide detectives about a murder that looked gang related. It had ended up being a drive-by involving a newer gang that we’d come across recently, and one of the two victims was a thirteen-year-old Mason had been trying to get off the streets over the last few months named Lil Tay. And though Mason was acting like this was just another case, I knew this was harder for him than the rest.
Knowing there was nothing I could say, I clapped his shoulder and let him be alone with his thoughts. Grabbing my phone, I smiled when I finally saw Rachel’s text from last night.
SOUR PATCH:
Just so you know . . . cleaning up from a whipped cream war without you isn’t nearly as fun. See you when you get home. Love you.
We just finished up, be home soon babe. Love you too.
Rachel had moved to Tampa Bay the week after she showed up in my apartment and I’d never been happier. My parents loved her just as much as she loved them, and she fit in with my life well. Mason’s younger sister and Rachel were practically inseparable and his parents viewed her as an extension of their family, the same way they did me.
Candice was graduating at the end of this month and we were taking a two-week vacation to be there and spend time with the Jenkinses in California before Candice came back with us for a month. Rachel couldn’t wait to see her, and honestly, I think Mason was excited to have that particular hookup back.
Work was going well; Mase and I—as well as our parents—were happy we were out of the inner parts of narcotics. Living that way isn’t something that any cop would want; the reward of bringing down an entire drug ring was what had made it worthwhile. For us to go to the gang division was natural. We knew the ins and outs of different gangs, already knew a lot of the members, and were no longer undercover. It was perfect for us, and we were good at what we did. Most importantly, Rachel supported me one hundred percent.
A month after Rachel had moved here, I’d asked her to marry me again. This time, there was absolutely nothing between us and everything about it felt different . . . felt right. We talked about everything, there were never secrets kept unless there was a surprise involved, and there were never any lies. And even when my family and Mason’s asked for her side of the story about our time in Texas and when we broke up, Rachel never held it against me. She’d gotten everything out the night she came here and left it there. She wasn’t one to hold grudges, and I loved her for it. I would always hate myself for what happened, but whenever I started to bring it up, she would kiss me to shut me up and say we were moving forward.
We were getting married at the end of June, and Rachel and my mom had been busy planning the wedding since we set the date. I loved that she was enjoying this and that she was going to get the wedding she deserved, but I didn’t care about the details. I just wanted her to be mine, and in a month and a half, she would be.
The doors to the elevator opened and we stepped in. Just as they were closing, someone started yelling my name from down the hall and Mason caught the door just in time.
“Ryan! Gates!” Sergeant Ramirez ran toward us and as soon as he was in the elevator, he started pounding on the Close Doors button.
I suppressed a groan. I was exhausted and wanted to get home to my fiancée.
“We already have three units at the scene, and I’ll be following you there.”
Ramirez was a K-9 unit; why did they want his
dog, Crush, there? And what scene? “Wha—”
“I know you’re anxious to get there, but you know we’re doing everything we can for this.” The elevator was already moving but Ramirez kept stabbing at the ground-level button. “How are you holding up? You look really calm, are you in shock? Maybe you should let Gates drive.”
That seemed to snap Mason out of his thoughts. His head jerked up and his eyes widened. “Why would I need to drive?”
“And why would I be in shock?” My heart started racing as Ramirez started hitting the Open Doors button.
Ramirez gave both of us an awkward sympathetic look before ushering us out to the underground parking lot. “You weren’t informed?”
“Of what?” I was supposed to be the one in shock. So it had something to do with me. My parents, my— Oh God . . . “What happened?!”
“I’m sorry, I thought someone already told you, you were supposed to be informed already. I didn’t understand why I saw you two walking down the hall. I figured you would have already been there.” He mumbled to himself as he kept walking toward the lot. “Look, I’m sorry I’m the one who has to tell you this.” He stopped walking abruptly and turned to look at me. His expression was one I had seen so many times and had even had to use myself. My stomach dropped and it felt like time slowed as I waited for him to tell me one of fifty scenarios that were flashing through my mind. “A call came into dispatch about an hour ago. It was your fiancée, Ryan. The only thing that came from her end of the call was her saying her name, that someone had broken in—”
I didn’t wait to hear the rest. I took off running for my truck and had just gotten to the driver’s door when Mason slammed me into the side and ripped the keys from my hand. After barking at me to get in the passenger seat, he fired up the engine and peeled out of the lot.
“This isn’t happening. This isn’t happening, Mase, tell me this isn’t fucking happening!”
“Kash—”
“Damn it!” I roared, and punched at the dashboard. “I don’t even know if she’s okay, Mason! What was Ramirez saying, did he say if she’s okay?! Is she—oh God. Rach, baby, please be alive,” I whispered, and slumped into my seat, raking my hands over my face.
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