by ID Johnson
“Wow,” Memphis murmured. “This really is breathtaking.”
“I know,” Olivia practically whispered. “I’ve always loved it here. I can’t believe its existence even slipped my mind for a while, but I remember coming here with my family when I was younger. I’d daydream about who used to attend service here, the stories these walls would tell if they could.”
“Do you have any idea when it was built?”
“No,” Olivia admitted, “though I want to say it pre-dates the Civil War. I think once I heard my dad say 1840-something, maybe.”
“The architecture would line up with that era,” Memphis agreed. “It’s a basic design, the type of church most congregates built back then.”
“The nails are square, too, if that helps,” Olivia pointed out. “All I know is, when I walk inside I feel like I’m not alone, like the people who used to worship here are sitting in the pews with me. It’s comforting to think that the same God they prayed to and sang hymns to is the same one we worship today.”
Memphis nodded, and the look on his face let her know he understood what she was saying. “You actually go in?” he asked after a moment. “Are you sure that’s safe? There are a lot of holes in the ceiling.”
Olivia took a few steps toward the little building. “I think it’s safe. My dad used to let us go in, and nothing has ever fallen while I’ve been here.”
He followed, but she could tell he was hesitant. “How long has it been since you came here with your family, though? Ten years?”
She thought for a moment. She remembered coming out here when she was ten or eleven, which would’ve been at least twelve years ago. “Something like that,” she admitted. “But I was in here the other day, and everything is fine. It’s safe.”
Somehow, she could tell by the look on his face, he wasn’t sure, but he followed anyway, and Olivia carefully pulled open the door, Memphis kicking some of the snow out from in front of it so they could squeeze through.
“Are these the original pews?” he asked, carefully running a hand over the one closest to the door.
“I think so,” she replied. “There’s not much else left. Even the cross that used to hang up there is gone.” She pointed to the spot above the dais where the shadow still lingered as she made her way down the aisle toward the front row.
“It really is amazing,” Memphis whispered. Olivia stopped and looked back at him, watching him gaze up at the ceiling and at every wall. She remembered feeling the same way when she’d first come in a few days ago. Perhaps she had as a child, too, although she doubted it. She likely didn’t appreciate what she was looking at then—an entombment of history.
Snow had accumulated inside the building, and she used her gloved hand to brush the drifts off of the pew. She cleared off enough space for both of them and sat down, turning so she could see Memphis slowly making his way down the aisle, still taking it in. Eventually, he reached her and gave her a small smile, as if he wasn’t quite sure how to explain his reaction.
“I bet it’s even prettier in the springtime,” he said, sitting down beside her and spreading the blanket over her lap. She made sure he kept the far corner of it. Without the sunlight, it was chilly inside the little enclosure.
“I’ve never been here in the spring, but I’d love to come and see it,” she replied. They were sitting close together, but their knees weren’t even touching. Still, she could smell his aftershave and the distinct smell of leather she always picked up on whenever he was around. She wondered if all cowboys smelled that way.
“When I was much younger, we used to go to an old country church,” Memphis said, adjusting his Stetson. “My mom used to sing a special every now and again. I remember seeing her stand up there on a little stage a lot like this one. She could belt it out like Reba when she wanted to.”
Olivia assumed he meant Reba McIntyre. She didn’t really listen to country music, but her parents did. “Why did you stop going there?” she asked, trying to picture Memphis as a young boy watching his mother from one of the pews.
“I’m not sure,” he admitted. “I think there was some sort of a fall out over finding a new preacher, and my mom decided to take us to a bigger church closer to town.”
“By town do you mean Houston?” she asked, smiling.
“Yes,” he nodded. “We called Houston ‘town’. I know that may seem odd since it’s clearly a huge metropolitan area, but if you were going to Houston, you were going to town.”
Olivia giggled. “I love that. Country living, small town life, those are things I can appreciate. Charles Town is small. Everyone knows everyone else. Sometimes, that can get annoying, when fifty people ask about the book within a few minutes, but the good thing is eventually you run out of people to ask.” He laughed, understanding what it was like to live in a similar place, she was sure. “I love the friendliness and knowing we are all there to take care of each other when needed.”
“I like that, too,” Memphis admitted. “Going away to a much larger town for college, and then moving to Houston, I’ve missed some of that.”
“Is it like that on the rig?” she asked. “I can’t imagine there are too many people out there.”
“Probably more people than you think. But, no, not really. Some folks help out and take care of each other, but it’s mostly men. We are missing that nurturing aspect you find in small towns with all the women, especially the older ones who make life interesting and mind everyone has what they need. And, of course, there are no children either. So that makes it different, too. And there are no little hangouts to visit.”
“Right.” Olivia thought about the dinner and the bakery. There wouldn’t be anything like those places on the rig. “Do you like kids?” she asked, hoping it sounded like a follow up to his comment about there being no children on the rig and nothing more.
He shrugged. “I think so. I mean… the only ones I’ve really been around since I was one myself were my ex’s nieces and nephews. They were good kids. We had fun hanging out together. Once, we took them to the zoo. It was great seeing their faces light up when they looked at the animals.”
“My nieces love the zoo, too.” A pang hit her heart; she wondered what Ruby and Paisley were doing at her house without her there.
“I definitely want to have kids someday,” Memphis volunteered. “Ellen didn’t want to have any, and that was something we argued about some.”
Olivia was surprised. “She didn’t? Why not?”
“I’m not sure,” he shrugged. “She said something about it taking too much time. Her mom was also a single mother, like mine, but I think Ellen always thought she wouldn’t have time to follow her dreams and still be a good mom.”
“What does she do for a living?”
“She’s a photographer,” Memphis replied. “Her aspirations were pretty big. She wanted to work for a major magazine.”
“That’s a good thing,” Olivia reminded him. “I guess some people just don’t see themselves as parents, and there’s nothing wrong with that.”
“Do you see yourself as a parent?” he asked, looking at her out of the side of his eye with his head tilted away.
“I do,” Olivia replied, smiling. “I’m not sure if I’ll make a good mother or not, but I had a good role model, and I know I’d always love my kids more than anything.”
Memphis chuckled and straightened up to face her. “I think you’d make a great mom, Liv.”
She suddenly felt her heart race at his use of the nickname and the compliment. “Thank you.” She managed to say it without sounding like she was running a sprint, or at least she hoped so. “I think you’d make a good dad, too.”
“You think?” he asked, a surprised expression on his handsome face.
“I do,” she replied, turning a bit more toward him. “You’d definitely take good care of them.” She didn’t mention she knew this from personal experience, but then she assumed he’d already know that.
“Thank you,” Memphis said, n
odding. Then, his face changed. He looked a bit melancholy. “Well, I did not have a good role model.”
Olivia remembered him mentioning his dad moved away when he was younger. “I’m sorry. It must have been really hard, growing up without your dad.”
He slowly tipped his head up and down, and looked away. Olivia decided to give him a moment. Memphis stared at the same spot on the wall that had caught her attention the other day—the remnants of the cross. Eventually, he said, “We are working on it now.”
“That’s good. That’s really good,” Olivia said. She reached out and gently put her hand on his arm, just above the blanket. “I bet being out here together has helped. Staying in that cabin always brought my family closer together.”
If her hand on his arm bothered him, he didn’t let on. Memphis turned his attention back to her. “You used to stay there?”
“We did. My dad loved how the cabin was so close to the water. The view from the porch on a clear night is amazing.”
“Yeah, it really is,” Memphis agreed. “Are you close to your dad?”
“I’m close to my whole family,” she replied. “My dad has always been my protector and my biggest champion. I don’t know what I’d do without him.”
“He sounds like a great guy,” Memphis said, his voice sincere. “It’s really nice you have someone like that to take care of you.”
Olivia’s heart wanted to shout, “You could be the one to take care of me!” but she fought the urge. “Yeah, both of my parents are amazing.”
He nodded, and with a thoughtful look said, “I’m very lucky to have a mom like mine. She did an amazing job of raising us with very little help.”
“She sounds wonderful,” Olivia agreed. “I wish I’d had the chance to meet her.” She considered saying she hoped she’d have the chance to meet her someday, but she didn’t bother putting her heart out there, not after what happened a few days ago.
“My mom said to tell you she can’t wait to read your new book,” Memphis said, looking her in the eye.
Olivia sat up straight, pulling her hand back. “What? Your mom’s read my book?”
“Yes. She knew exactly who you were as soon as I mentioned your name.”
“Really?”
“Now, why is that so hard to believe?” he asked. “I called her the other night, and she started hooping and hollering as soon as I said Olivia Kensington.”
Olivia couldn’t help but giggle, even though she knew her face was turning red. She still hadn’t gotten used to people recognizing her name.
Memphis continued. “Now, she said to tell you she hopes Margot ends up with Elliott, but… I don’t know. It turns out I’m more of a Caleb kinda guy myself after all.”
She was having trouble believing her ears. “What’s that? How do you know about Caleb?”
“I read your book,” he replied, a crooked grin on his face. “I told you the other night I was your Elliott. How would I have known about him if I hadn’t read it?”
“I don’t know,” Olivia shrugged. “A lot of people know what Team Edward and Team Jacob mean and they’ve never read Twilight.”
He looked confused, and Olivia wondered if maybe he was one of the few who hadn’t heard of the book series she was referring to. “Well, I finished it last night,” Memphis replied. “I’m sure it will be great no matter what you decided to do, but Caleb is just the more practical choice.”
“But she really loves Elliott,” Olivia pointed out. She never discussed her own book with anyone, and she couldn’t believe she was doing so now.
“Yes, but she loves Caleb, too, doesn’t she?”
Olivia rocked her head back and forth. “Sort of. Yes, I guess so. I mean… sometimes it’s hard to tell.”
“I don’t think it’s hard to tell. I think she loves them both, and while Elliott may be the dashing soldier who comes in and sweeps her off her feet, Caleb is the one who will provide for her and take care of her.”
As much as Olivia wanted to read between the lines, she reminded herself that he was talking about a book, not their own relationship. “Well, I guess you’ll just have to wait and see what happens,” she replied. It was her standard response.
“I’m looking forward to it,” he said. “Maybe I could get a sneak peek?”
“Are you crazy?” she asked. “My super fans would kill if they knew I let someone else read it first.”
“They can’t be bigger fans than I am.” He looked sincere, and she almost believed him. “Not bigger than my mom, anyway. She probably has a T-shirt with your book cover on it.”
Olivia couldn’t help but laugh. She had seen some of those herself, but the idea of someone wearing one boggled her mind. “Seriously, your mom sounds awesome. And not just because she likes my book.”
“She is awesome,” he confirmed. “I wish you could meet her.” He was quiet for a moment, and once again, Olivia thought about mentioning that she wished she could, too, but then he added, “She’ll be moving to Virginia soon, and I’m not sure how I’m going to handle that. I mean, I haven’t lived in the exact same town as her for years, but I’d always try to go visit her a few times a month. Now… well, it’s been a while since I’ve seen her, and soon enough she won’t be nearby.” All of the playfulness was gone from his tone.
“I’m sorry. That does sound rough. Why is she moving?”
“She’ll be retiring from the post office soon, and then she wants to be close to her grandbaby. I can’t blame her. It’ll just be… different.”
It made sense. Olivia carefully broached a subject she’d been afraid to bring up before he mentioned his mom. “If all of the rest of your family is going to be in Virginia, why aren’t you?”
Memphis was stoic, his eyes locked on the wall in front of him again. It took a long time for him to answer. “I’m honestly not sure,” he finally said. Quietly, he continued. “My dad offered me a job, but I don’t think I’m going to take it. The idea of working for him just seems… wrong.”
Olivia felt a lump growing in her throat. The possibility of Memphis moving to Alexandria, which was still far from Charles Town but not states away like Houston, made her heart leap in her chest. She didn’t dare get her hopes up too high, and yet the prospect was there. “You could find a different job,” she reminded him. “At least you’d be near your family.”
He shrugged as if the option of finding different work didn’t seem plausible. “Maybe. I guess it just makes me frustrated to think Nash and even my mom have been able to fully forgive my father and I can’t.”
“Everyone sees each situation differently,” Olivia replied. “Your reaction to your father leaving could’ve been stronger than Nash’s for a number of reasons. You can’t be upset at yourself for the way you feel. The good thing is, you said you were working on it.”
Memphis took his hat off and ran his hands through his hair, setting the Stetson down on the pew beside him. “What if I can never forgive him?” he asked.
Seeing him without his hat was a bit distracting, but Olivia concentrated on what he was saying, despite the new view of his mesmerizing eyes. “I think you’ve come further toward forgiving him than you’re able to recognize,” she replied. “After all, you were willing to lock yourself in a cabin with him for several days, right? You drove halfway across the country knowing you’d be in fairly tight quarters with him for a week or so.”
“That’s true,” Memphis said. “But I mostly came for my grandpa. He’s not getting any younger. And I wanted to see Nash.”
“But his presence didn’t deter you, and I think that says a lot. Not wanting to work with him and see him every day is different, I guess. But I think you need to give yourself a little bit of credit.”
He was thoughtful again for several moments. Finally, he said, “Maybe you’re right. I guess I’ll need to think on it a little more.”
“You know, when I am in a situation where I don’t know what to do, I always pray about it,” Olivia said, quietly. �
�And there’s really not much of a better place to sit and say a prayer. My dad used to read us scripture in here, and then my family would all hold hands and pray. I always walked out feeling uplifted and ready to take on the world.”
The way he was staring at her so intently, Olivia thought maybe she had misspoken. Perhaps he wasn’t as spiritual as she had thought. But then, he cleared his throat and said, “Olivia, would you mind praying with me?”
Her eyebrows raised. “No, I wouldn’t mind at all.”
Memphis reached out, and she slipped her hand in his. He turned toward the front, where the pulpit would be, and closed his eyes. She did the same, and silently they both prayed. Olivia asked for guidance, for forgiveness, and added that, if God saw fit, He would find a way to make this union permanent. The feel of Memphis’s hand in hers just felt right, and she hoped God meant for them to be together always.
A few minutes later, she felt him exhale, as if he were letting the weight of the world go, and she opened her eyes to see him gazing at her. “Are you ready to go?” he asked.
Olivia smiled at him. “Yes,” she replied, realizing she’d have to let go of his hand but feeling at peace that God’s plan was greater than what she could see.
Memphis placed his hat back on his head and stood, folding up the blanket as he did so. “As much fun as this has been, I’m sure you have work to do, and I will not be responsible for keeping your novel away from the world.”
She stood and followed him down the aisle, looking around one last time. “I guess if I somehow manage to miss my deadline, I’ll just have to blame you,” she teased.
“You best not,” he said over his shoulder. “Who knows what kind of reparations your fans might demand.” He pushed the door open carefully, and a light sprinkling of snow fell off of the roof. Once it had cleared, he stepped out of the way so Olivia could go through first and then he followed her out.
“They are usually pretty mild-mannered,” Olivia assured him. The sun seemed even brighter than before, and she felt lighter, as if praying with Memphis had taken away some of the residue of concern she’d been carrying around with her for weeks.