Wings and Beyond

by Joy Redmond

  “Sure, honey. I’m so glad to hear that you have good memories of your room and I hope you have good memories of your home life with us. We did the best we knew how in being parents. I know we’re almost as old as your grandparents, but right and wrong doesn’t change with age and time. We did our best to teach you right. You rebelled, but now that you’re going to be a mother, I think you’ll understand us better.”

  “I’m sure me being a mother will shed a new light on many things. I appreciate all that you and Dad did for me, and I know you did what your hearts told you was right. So there’s no point in rehashing yesteryear.”

  Mandy stood up and for a few seconds gazed down on the only two people besides her blood Daddy and Mama who had ever really loved her. She saw two people who were aging and realized time stood still for no one. She turned and headed for the stairs, her emotions on a roller coaster.

  Mandy walked into her bedroom, stopped, and noticed her wedding gown was still spread across the bed. She found that strange. It wasn’t like Iris to leave any apparel on the bed. Everything always had to be in a drawer or on a hanger in the closet. She moved closer and ran her hand over it, and sighed.

  She looked around and recalled the first time she had seen the room. She had thought it was something right out of a fairytale. Then she remembered all the lonely days and nights she had spent in it while all her peers were out having a good time. “It was my haven and my prison,” she whispered.

  She was glad Pearl had collected her clothes and her other things while she and Jack were on their so-called honeymoon. It would have been hard for her to pack up her stuff. However, Pearl had only taken what she thought she could fit into the tin box, which wasn’t much, and the rest of her clothes, shoes, and personal things were in the Walker house.

  What about your diary and journals, Nikko whispered.

  Mandy’s heart seemed to stop as she ran across the floor, flipped up the edge of the bedspread, then raised up the top mattress. She blew a breath of relief as she pulled them out. “Thank God, Mother didn’t find them.” She gathered them into her arms and hugged them to her chest. My whole life, she thought. All on paper. She straightened the bedspread, gave the room another eye sweep, and then headed downstairs.

  “What have you got there, Amanda?” Iris asked as she reached for the journals.

  Mandy held tightly. “Just some stories that I’ve been writing through the years. I’m not ready to share them yet.”

  “Oh,” Iris said, but the look in her eyes wasn’t happy. “Well, I’m surprised that Pearl left anything behind. When she came to collect your stuff, my first instinct was to throw her out of my house. But I knew I couldn’t bring myself to pack for you, so I just let her have at it. To tell the truth, I haven’t been able go into your room since you left.” Iris wiped her eyes. “I did escort your daddy upstairs when he came after the reception.”

  Mandy’s eyes widened and her breath caught in her throat. “Daddy was here after the reception? He wanted to see my room? I thought—” He said he and Lee were headed back to Indianapolis when he kissed me bye at the church. What made him change his mind? she wondered. But Daddy is always changing his mind about when he’ll come and when he’ll go.

  “I thought it was strange,” Iris said. “Everybody was gone. I’d cleaned up the kitchen, and Otis and I were getting ready for bed when we heard a knock on the front door. Imagine my surprise when I saw your daddy standing there. Anyway, he very politely asked if we would mind to let him see your room. So, I led him upstairs and opened your door. He slowly walked over to the bed and then he ran his hand over your wedding gown and whispered, ‘My little Punkin.’ Then he looked around the room as if he was trying to memorize everything he saw. I kind of felt sorry for him.”

  Mandy felt tears welling. “Daddy actually wanted to see my room and he wanted to touch my wedding gown? I can’t believe it. I guess he had his reasons. I appreciate you and Dad letting him do that.” She wiped her eyes and swallowed hard, determined not to cry. She was worn out from crying over Daddy.

  “Well, it would have been rude if we hadn’t. It seemed like it was something he had to see before he could leave town. He came by himself too. So I think it was a special moment that he didn’t want to share with Lee or anybody else. I just quietly stood in the doorway. I didn’t want to intrude on his intentions, whatever they were.”

  “Thank you, Mother. That was very kind of you.” She took several deep breaths, then bid her parents goodbye, telling them that she’d be back as soon as she could. She got into the car, sat and turned toward the house, her emotions all over the place. Daddy had come here just to see my bedroom and see where I spent my childhood. The last time he had met Iris and Otis was at the lawyer’s office when he signed me away, so why did he come here? Maybe he wanted to see if I had it better than when me and my brothers were living with him. Maybe he wanted to soothe his soul a little bit.

  Mandy settled back in the seat, started the car and drove back to Bon Harbor, her mind still reeling. Daddy touched my wedding gown. He called me Punkin again. He’ll never know how much that means to me. And the news about my pregnancy went better than I was expecting. Now I wonder how Jack and his parents will react. Maybe things are going to work out. I’ll have my own family, and I’ll make sure that our house is filled with love and laughter.

  Mandy saw Jack walking into the Walker’s house when she pulled into the driveway. He got a ride and took off work early. He’s getting good at that. I sure hope he realizes that he has to have all the hours and days he can get when he knows that we’re having a baby.

  Mandy got out of the car and headed for the Walker’s back door. I’m sure Pearl has started cooking supper. She still insists that we eat every meal with her and the family. When we’re all sitting around the table, I’ll break the news.

  When they were all seated for the evening meal, Pearl said, “Well, Mandy, what did the doctor say?”

  Mandy quickly blurted, “He said that I’m pregnant. I’m due the first part of October. Actually the first part of September, but you’ll find out when it’s born.

  “I told you she was pregnant, Lester. Didn’t I?”

  Lester nodded yes.

  “Well, hot dayum. I’m gonna be a daddy!” Jack said as he spooned a big bite of mashed potatoes into this mouth. “If you’re any kind of a woman, you’ll have me a boy. I ain’t having any little split-tails around here.”

  Sorry, you jackass. I’m having a little girl. What a wonderful reaction from all. Mandy ran her hand over her abdomen. Everything is gonna be alright, little princess. Mommy will see to that.

  Mandy graduated from high school, and only Patsy and Shelly knew that she was pregnant. What they didn’t know was how far along she was.

  May 21th, 1961, Mandy walked across the stage and received her diploma. Her graduation gown hid her almost six-month pregnant belly, and Iris and Otis weren’t embarrassed. Mandy was just glad it was over but a tiny part of her was saddened to part with the freedom that school had allowed her.

  After five months of having to eat supper with the Walkers every night, then watch TV with them, Mandy decided she’d start cooking the evening meal for her and Jack. She was tired of being at their house every night, and she disliked Pearl more by the day. She thought of Jack’s dad and how timid he was. He was the one who had never risen his voice to her, nor made a bad remark.

  Iris had given her two cookbooks, and she already knew how to cook a few things from helping Iris in the kitchen. As for TV, they could go into the house after they had eaten. There was no money for a TV and no place to put one of their own.

  One afternoon, Mandy took down a Betty Crocker cookbook and found a recipe for pie crust and one for an apple pie. How hard could it be? She didn’t have a dime to her name, as Jack still handed his paycheck to Pearl every Friday, and Pearl gave him an allowance. She walked to the corner grocery store where Pearl had an account. She introduced herself as Pearl’s daughter-in-
law and asked if she could open an account for her and Jack.

  “You sure can, young lady,” Mr. Bernstein said. “I’ve known the Walkers for years. Your business is appreciated.”

  Mandy bought a chicken, a bag of potatoes, fresh green beans, a bag of Red Delicious apples, and the ingredients to make a pie crust and pie filling. She finished filling the cart with salt, pepper, and other seasonings, and a can of Crisco. She carried the bags home, feeling good about taking her responsibility of being a housewife, and soon, a mother.

  When she got home she dragged a box across the floor. It was sitting by the fridge, the same spot she had seen the vision of the basinet. Iris had packed a box of pots, a frying pan, a pie pan and a cake pan. In the bottom of the box was an oblong pan and lid. She washed and dried them. The stove only had two burners, but that would work for the green beans and potatoes. And she could bake the chicken in the oven.

  She baked the pie first, and when she took it out of the oven it looked and smelled perfect. She was anxious to show Jack that she was a good cook. While the pie cooled, she seasoned the chicken and put it in the oven. She snapped the green beans, and peeled potatoes. The beans and potatoes were boiling and she turned down the heat to simmer.

  Everything smells good. Just wait until Jack eats my cooking. He’ll know that his mama isn’t the only cook in the world. He’ll be proud of his wife, she thought, sure of her feelings.

  She watched the clock. Everything would be ready by the time Jack came home. She went to the bathroom, peed, and just as she walked back into the kitchen, Pearl opened the door and walked in. She stood for a long minute and sniffed. “You’re cooking?” she said as she walked over to the stove and lifted the lids from the pots. Then she opened the oven. “Jack doesn’t like green beans, you don’t have a way of whipping the potatoes, and he hates baked chicken.”

  Mandy watched in stunned silence as Pearl picked up the pans and dumped the contents into the trashcan. Then took the chicken out of the oven and dumped it on top of the beans and potatoes. “You’ll eat in the house with us, just like you always have.”

  Mandy was in shock. Nikko yelled inside her head, Punch that bitch in the mouth!

  Mandy froze, but she could feel the heat as anger began to boil, and Nikko kept urging her on. Mandy tried to move, but she seemed to be paralyzed from shock and anger.

  Just as Pearl started to walk across the floor, Mandy noticed the pie was shaking on the counter top. Then it went flying through the air, hitting Pearl in the back of the head.

  Mandy gasped.

  Pearl grabbed the back of her head and cried. “Who do you think you are? You’re gonna be sorry for this little stunt! You just wait until I tell Jack. He’ll put you in your place!”

  Mandy was still in shock as she watched Pearl running across the backyard, picking and flinging apples from her hair. Nikko giggled, and so did Mandy. She looked down at what was once a perfect pie, splattered on the floor. “How did that happen, Nikko? I swear I didn’t touch it. At least I don’t think I did.”

  Before Nikko could send thoughts to Mandy, Jack came through the door, his eyes blazing, and Mandy swore she could see the devil dancing on his corneas. “What has gotten into you? What did you do to Mama?” He yelled loudly enough to be heard by all the neighbors.

  Mandy sneered. “She threw out the food I cooked, so I threw the pie at her! I don’t know who she thinks she is, but—”

  Jack backhanded Mandy across the mouth and the force was so hard she stumbled backward and her body hit the couch. Just as she tried to stand and lunge at him, he slapped her down again.

  Protect the baby, Nikko cried.

  Mandy cradled her stomach with both arms and bent forward.

  Jack put his knee in her chest, drew back his arm and his fist was headed toward her. Mandy closed her eyes, kept her arms wrapped around her stomach and waited for the punch. She felt nothing. Instead, she heard a loud crash.

  She opened her eyes and stared in disbelief. The lamp that had been on the end table was on the floor, the light bulb shattered and the shade was rolling. She blinked, then she saw blood running down the side of Jack’s face.

  “My God! I’m cut!” Jack ran outside and across the backyard, yelling, “Mama!”

  Still cradling her stomach, Mandy bent over laughing. “Run to Mama, you big tittybaby. She’ll kiss your boo-boo, and patch your nob as if she’s ole Dame Dod!”

  That was fantastic, Mandy. But how did you do that? Nikko said, and she giggled.

  “I didn’t, Nikko. But whoever did, I sure am thankful. Maybe he’ll think twice before he hits me again. He’s stronger than me, but he can’t out muscle the spirits.”

  You got that right. I had no idea the spirits were capable of that. But, remember the other things they did for us? Amazing! I think the supernatural will protect us and our baby. Rest easy.

  Mandy cleaned up the pie mess and picked up the lamp, then swept up the glass. Then she looked out the window. “Come on back, Jack. Do something else. You might get electrocuted the next time you raise a hand to me.”

  Jack didn’t come back to the trailer until bedtime. Mandy didn’t go into the house to eat or watch TV. She sat on the couch for a few minutes, running things over in her mind, still shocked by Pearl’s actions, but more shocked and amazed as if an invisible force had taken over for her. It was invisible, and boy did it have force. Who did it?

  After a few minutes, she walked back to the bedroom, raised up the top mattress and pulled out a journal. She fished through her purse and found a ballpoint pen. She sat back down on the couch and began to write about what had just happened. How she wished she had a movie of it. She ended the story with: I married a devil. I have a mother-in-law from hell. I have a father-in-law who’s a jellyfish. I have a sister-in-law and two brothers-in-law who are no more than puppets. So much for a home filled with love and laughter.

  She took the journal back to the bedroom and hid it under the mattress. She sat on the side of the bed, remembering how it had been forbidden when she was living with Iris and Otis. It felt good, just sitting and being alone with her thoughts and feelings.

  “Nikko, I think Purple Angel is still with us. She’s taking care of us.”

  I think it’s more than Purple Angel. I think the whole spirit world is working for us. Purple Angel is much too gentle. I can’t wait to see what happens next. I hope a spirit will slap Pearl’s fat jaws or kick her fat ass across the yard, or dropkick her out the backdoor!

  Mandy giggled. “I’d love to see that! That would be fun and laughter.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  For the next three months, Mandy did all she could to keep the peace. She didn’t want to take a chance on taking a beating from Jack, just in case the spirits were busy and didn’t come to her rescue. She had to protect her baby at all costs. They continued to eat the evening meal with the family. Mandy always cleaned up the kitchen and did the dishes, while the others retired to the living room to watch TV.

  The only thing she was interested in watching was Ben Casey. Vince Edwards was so handsome and she fantasied about him being her doctor. The medical profession was so fascinating. And her heart ached, knowing she’d never be the nurse she’d dreamed of being.

  Iris came and picked up Mandy three days a week and they knitted booties, sweaters, and blankets. Mandy enjoyed their time together. One afternoon, Iris said, “I’m going to knit a pink skirt, sweater, and booties to match. Just in case you have a girl. And if not this time, then maybe next time.”

  There won’t be a next time, Mother. “I like that idea. I think the outfit will be darling on my daughter. I’m claiming a daughter.” She laughed.

  Iris laughed too. “I sure hope you’re right. But a grandson will be wonderful, too. The other things we knitted are all yellow and green, so they’ll work for either one. I must say, you’re good, Mandy. You knitted like a pro.”

  “Thank you, Mother. My heart is in this. I’m anxious to put a baby
into the outfits. Pearl has already bought diapers, rubber pants, undershirts, and one-piece pajamas, and a full basket of soaps, lotions and shampoos. I’m pretty much set.”

  “I’m anxious too. I’ve never held a newborn, but I think I can do it,” Iris said and she had the biggest smile Mandy had ever seen.

  “You’ll do fine, Mother. Mandy stood, rubbed the small of her back and said, “I guess I need to head back home. I’ll see you in a couple days.”

  Iris kissed Mandy, and Mandy kissed and hugged Iris back, tightly.

  Mandy woke up August 31st and decided she’d go through the Book of Baby Names. She’d gone over the girl names a few times, but no name seemed to ring right in her head. Maybe when I see her, a name will come to me. And just in case I got the message wrong and it’s a boy, I already know it will carry Jack and Lester’s names. Suddenly, a tightening in her abdomen squeezed the breath out of her. She rubbed her belly and within a minute the squeezing stopped. A few minutes later, it happened again. She watched the clock. Every twenty minutes, her belly tightened, and each time it was harder.

  She decided to go for a walk. She walked for several blocks, but the squeezing only stopped for a few minutes. This isn’t working. Maybe I need to go back home and soak in the tub. This is worse than a Charlie horse in my calves.

  As she soaked, the pains worsened. She got out of the tub, dressed and decided to lie down. By 4 pm, she was breaking out in a cold sweat every time the squeezing clutched her. “Holy Moly, I’m in labor,” she whispered. “I didn’t know what labor felt like. This is no fun.”

  She swung her feet off the bed, dragged a small suitcase out from under the bed. She packed three nightgowns and panties and bras. She packed two diapers, safety pins, rubber pants and a pair of pajamas and a receiving blanket for the baby. By the time she was packed, the pains were coming every ten minutes.

  By 5 o’clock, Jack came into the trailer. “Ain’t nobody in the house, where—” He stopped talking when he saw Mandy clutch her stomach. “What’s wrong with you?”