by Rowan Hanlon
“I know,” he said evenly.
“You know?” she asked, not understanding.
“I know about all that,” he said and nodded slightly. “I’ve known for quite some time.”
“How?” Kael asked, astonished. Here she’d been holding onto some pretty major baggage and… Well, it had been for nothing, all that emotional torment was for nothing. He’d known all along. She felt relief for a moment, then like a fool. She knew she should have just been upfront with him to begin with. She wished she had of, especially now.
Nick took a breath and said, “Because of who my family is, they are very cautious. Anytime someone new enters, they run a background check on them. I figured you knew that.”
“No, I didn’t,” she said then felt her emotions start to overwhelm her. “Oh, my God. Oh, my God! I don’t know whether to be relieved or pissed off.”
“It’s just something they do, baby,” he told her. “I wouldn’t have cared if they’d told me you had busted out of jail. I love you. End of discussion.”
Kael stared at him, wondering how in the hell she’d gotten such a good man. Was he real? Or was he just plain stupid? He wasn’t stupid. Well, he might have been stupid in love with her and that was just fine.
“That all?” Nick asked.
She eyed him and said, “And you have no problem with any of this?”
“I don’t,” he said. “Why should I? That was your life before you met me.” He pulled back and smiled at her. “And I can see why you didn’t tell me. That’s pretty major stuff. I knew in time that you would. I just didn’t think it would take this long, to be honest.”
“You’re totally okay with this?” she asked.
He shrugged. “I’ll admit that it was a little shocking at first, but then I decided to see past all that and I was like, whatever. She’s still my girl and I love her. It’s not like you were a criminal, Kael. You just did some things that maybe you were embarrassed about and didn’t want anyone to know about. It’s understandable.”
Kael couldn’t help but smile at him. He was such a sweetheart. She asked, “Are you sure your mom didn’t drop you on your head when you were a baby?”
He cracked up. “No, why?”
“Because you are too good to be true. You act the opposite of what most people would. You don’t care.”
“Why should I care about things I had nothing to do with? I have no control of what you did before I met you. I accept that.”
“She did,” Kael said, nodding. “She dropped you on your fucking head.”
“No, she didn’t. Listen, I do care but I wasn’t about to push you about it, you know? I mean, I knew you’d tell me in time, like I said.”
“I kept trying to, but I kept putting it off because I was afraid of what might happen. I didn’t want to lose you. I was so afraid I’d lose you.” And she had been. She’d spent nights awake asking all the “what if” questions that came along with something like this—“What if I tell him and he leaves?” and “What if I tell him and he hates me?” She’d work herself almost into a panic, dreading the day when all the ghosts would pop out of the closet, dreading the fact that she might just lose him. She loved Nick and the thought of being without him almost make her physically sick.
“But you wouldn’t have lost me,” he said. “Ever. I love you, Kael. I’ve loved you since the day we met.”
She smiled at him and took his hand. “And I love you.”
They smiled at each other for a brief moment before he said, “Now can we stop acting so dorky?”
Kael cracked up. And that’s precisely why she loved Nick. He never took anything too seriously. He was more laid back and more fun than anyone she’d ever known. The sense of humor didn’t hurt, either. Neither did his good looks. “Huh,” she said. “And, so, now we’re here. The cat’s out of the bag.”
“Bag is in the river,” he finished.
“You got it mixed up!” she squealed and shook her head at him. “That’s not the way it goes. The cat is out of the bag. If he’s out of the bag, you couldn’t throw him into the river.”
“Oh,” he said. “Is that it? Why would you put a cat in a bag and throw it in the river?”
“I don’t know!” she exclaimed, exasperated. He stared at her. She stared back. “Oh, just shut up,” she said and they laughed a little before she sighed and said, “I can’t believe this was so easy with you. I thought for sure we’d have a big, ugly argument. I should have known better than that with you.”
“Well, there you go,” he said, smiling. “I’m not an asshole.”
Kael laughed again, shaking her head. “That you are not,” she said and sighed again, this time more loudly and with more relief. Then she remembered something, “So, do you parents know all about me?”
“They do,” he said, nodding.
“And they don’t hate me?” she asked, hoping they didn’t. She really liked Nick’s parents.
“No, they don’t hate you!” he exclaimed and shook his head. “It’s not like you lied about a bunch of stuff. You just didn’t divulge the information is all. And besides, they told me about it. They told me that you were a catch and that everyone has a past. That’s life. They said if I loved you to overlook it. So, I did. They know how in love we are. They’re romantics at heart, in case you haven’t noticed.”
She had noticed. His parents still held hands, his father still opened doors for his mother and one could tell they were still crazy about each another. And none of it was forced or put on. It was something to aspire to, their relationship. It proved that when something worked, it worked well.
“Besides,” Nick continued. “The dirt they dig up on some people is mind-blowing. Yours is mild compared to most. Very mild.”
“Wow,” Kael said. “The rich really are different.”
“No, we just have more money.”
They both laughed quietly before Kael smiled at him and put her hand on his face. She stared into his beautiful blue eyes and sighed loudly. “Now this is the hard part. About the baby. Okay.” She put her hand back in her lap and took a deep breath. “I was in college and was kind of going a little wild because my mother had just passed and my father wasn’t doing very well. Anyway, I dated this guy a few months and got pregnant. I couldn’t deal with it. I’m sorry, it was just too much.”
She stopped and caught her breath as her eyes teared up. Nick took her hand, squeezed it gently and told her, “Go on.”
“So, I went to this agency and they set it all up and I had her and gave her up. No one knew, not even Daddy. I never told him because it would have killed him. And my boyfriend didn’t want the baby, either, so he agreed, too, to give her up for adoption.” She started crying, the tears spilling out of her eyes and running down her face. “I have regretted it every day since, Nick. Not one day goes by that I don’t feel a stab in my heart for my baby girl.”
Nick pulled her into his arms, hugging her tightly. “It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not,” she said. “It hurts, like, every single day. It kills me but I just push it down and think of something else.”
“I know,” he said softly.
“So, here’s the thing,” she said, pulling out of his embrace. “After we started dating, I found her—she lives in Nashville with her parents. Anyway, I contacted them and they agreed to let me see her. They didn’t have to, either, because I signed all my parental rights away. But they’re nice people and they said okay, that would be fine. So, I went down there and we were going to meet at a park and I got there early and waited. And then they showed up and didn’t know I was there, you know?”
Nick nodded.
“And so, I watched her with them, with her family, and she was so happy. And so pretty, you wouldn’t believe! Such a good girl, too, you know? She listened to her parents and minded them. She was so sweet. And they were like the perfect family, you know? Perfect! It broke my heart because I knew I couldn’t take
her away from them and that’s why I had gone down there, because I wanted to tell them I was going to see about getting her back.”
“Wow,” Nick said.
“I don’t know how I planned on telling you,” she said. “I guess I just thought I’d get her and show up with her and let the chips fall where they may.”
“Damn, Kael,” he said. “That’s some emotional rollercoaster you’ve been riding.”
Kael nodded. It had been. It had been exhausting, too. “But after that, needless to say, I couldn’t even meet her. I thought I was such a mental wreck, it might screw her up. So, I called them and just told them I couldn’t make it and I came back to New York.”
“Oh, honey,” he said and gave her a deep hug. “You could have asked me to come with you.”
“No, I couldn’t,” she said. “I wasn’t ready to tell you, Nick. I guess I was just stupid, like I was going to show up and claim her or something.” She stopped and thought about how silly that sounded and cracked up a little. “Like I… I dunno. I wasn’t thinking straight and I certainly wasn’t going to do what was best for my daughter. But in the end, I did. I left her with her family. It was the right thing to do.”
“It was,” he said. “You made the right choice.”
“It still hurts like hell,” she said and wiped at her eyes.
“Maybe after we’re married, we’ll both contact them and see if we can work some visitation or something out,” he said. “You were young. You didn’t know what you were doing. You made a mistake. And you were grieving over your mother. That would make anyone a little crazy.”
“I just hate that I had to do it. I just hope it never causes her any pain, you know? When I lost my mom, I thought I’d die and we fought like cats and dogs.”
“It’s hard, I know.”
She nodded and felt something she hadn’t felt for a long time and that was relief. She’d told him and he didn’t hate her. Who would have thought? She turned to him and smiled, “You are the coolest guy ever.”
“And you’re the coolest girl,” he said. “I mean, you had her. You had the baby. You gave her life. She can’t do anything but thank you for that. And you did what was right for her at the time. Kael, times change and so do people. You’re different now, more mature. I am sure she will understand your reasoning.”
“I don’t know about that,” Kael said, thinking about it. “I hope so, though. I really do. And I guess, in a weird way, that’s why I’ve been so ambitious because in the back of my mind, I always thought I’d go get her and bring her here with me, to New York. And I wanted to be able to provide for her, you know?”
“I know,” he said.
“Wow,” Kael said. “I do feel better. So, you’re okay with all this? You don’t want me to leave?”
“Leave?” Nick asked and glanced at the suitcases. “I thought we were going on vacation.”
Kael cracked up and squealed, “You are such a dork! God, I love you!” She threw her arms around him and gave him a big kiss. He kissed her back and pushed her back on the couch, climbing on top of her. She responded and was about to start unbuttoning his shirt when he paused. “What is it?” she asked.
“Listen, I love you. I want you to know that we’ll figure out something about Madison. I promise you that.”
“How does everyone know her name?” she asked, staring into his eyes.
“What do you mean?”
“I never told you her name,” she said.
“Oh, I just know from the report,” he said then pulled back to study her. “What do you mean everyone knows her name?”
“Well, you and Celeste,” she said and sat up.
“Celeste?” he asked, shaking his head.
“Oh, God, I have more to tell you,” she said and groaned loudly. “Anyway, she and I got into a huge argument today. Big. She apparently had someone dig around my background and she was going to tell your parents about what a little con-artist I am. And those are her words. You know, because I didn’t technically graduate college, which you know about, which I put on my resume. She just twisted it all, trying to make me look bad. But that’s just the tip of the iceberg because she also dug all that other stuff up and threw it in my face for good measure.”
Nick sat back on the couch, shaking his head. “What the fuck?! Are you serious? What right does she have to do that?”
“I don’t know,” Kael said. “But I quit. I’m never going back there again.”
“Wow,” he said. “What else did she say?”
Kael thought about it then laughed a little. “She insinuated that I tricked you into dating me.”
Nick stared at her. “Well, didn’t you?”
“No!” she squealed and slapped his arm. “You ass. You tricked me! I didn’t even know who you were and you kept calling me and I kept dodging you. It was awful. You wore me down.” And he had. No matter what Celeste said, she hadn’t known who he—or his family for that matter—was. She’d only been in New York a few years and had dated a few guys, all of them jerks. She wasn’t looking for a man, quite honestly; she was just trying to break into the business. But there he had been at a party she was attending, smiling at her, asking her name, asking her where she was from, not letting her out of his sight. She’d only given him her number in an effort to blow him off. And he kept calling, begging her to go out with him. She conceded and… Well, now they were getting married. Funny how that works. She was so glad he hadn’t given up on her. She loved him with all her heart and didn’t really care about his money or his family connections, though they were nice, she had to admit. She would have loved him if he was a broke artist or a whatever. Nick was the catch of a lifetime.
“You were just playing hard to get,” he said, shaking his head.
“I was not!” she said. “I was just trying to get my career started and I didn’t have time for the likes of you. And I’ll tell you, if you weren’t so damned cute, I would have never made time for you. But those blue eyes got me.”
“I can’t help that I’m irresistible,” he said, a smart-assed twinkle in his eye.
Kael stared at him for a second, then cracked up. “You are so awful! But, yeah, you are irresistible. Damn you anyway.” She shook her head at him.
He grinned at her then asked, “What else did Celeste say?”
“It doesn’t matter,” Kael told him and held out her arms. “Come on. Let’s do it.”
“No, I want to know,” he said. “What else did she say? We might have to talk to someone about her.”
“Oh, don’t start that,” Kael said and started to feel bad all over again. “Listen, it was awful, the kind of thing that if someone filmed it, it would be big on YouTube.”
“You should probably go to Patrick about her. He needs to know this.”
“I’m not doing anything. It’s over. But I do feel bad.”
“Why?” he asked. “She’s a crazy bitch!”
“I said some really horrible stuff to her. Maybe I should go in tomorrow and apologize.”
“No,” he said. “As your attorney, I advise against that. Just let well enough alone.”
“You’re probably right but when do I ever listen to reason?” she asked and sighed. “And you’re serious about Madison, right? We’ll do something, right?”
“I promise,” he said.
She smiled at him and opened her arms again, inviting him in. He smiled back and leaned over, pressing his body into hers. They kissed softly, with passion. The kiss deepened until Nick pulled back.
“Want me to unpack your suitcases?” he asked.
Kael glanced over at them and shook her head. “Nah, I’ll do it as I am going to have a lot of free time on my hands for a while. I might even go through the whole loft and organize it. You know, get rid of a bunch of junk.”
“Keep your hands off the obelisk,” he told her.
She groaned. “If you don’t watch it, that obelisk might just become
a bone of contention.”
“It’ll come in handy for something,” he said and grinned.
She stared at him and he stared back. Then they both burst out laughing.
The Country House
Head down and with a look of determination on her face, Kael stepped off the elevator and walked past the receptionist area and headed to Celeste’s office. She didn’t even notice when Victoria fell in step with her.
“Hey, what are you doing here?” she asked and grabbed her arm.
Kael stopped walking and stared at her and shrugged. “I came to apologize to Celeste. And that’s all I’m going to do, too. And I’m out. I’m going to get another job. I feel really bad about all this.”
“Well,” she said. “She isn’t here.”
Kael’s heart sunk. She just wanted to get this over with once and for all. “Where is she?”
“At her country house,” Liza said.
Kael and Victoria hadn’t noticed her coming down the hall. They stared at her until she stopped in front of them.
“That’s where she goes when she’s down about something,” Liza said.
Kael groaned. She knew what she was “down” about and she felt somehow responsible. If only she could learn to keep her big mouth shut. But how was she supposed to do that when someone was attacking her so viciously? She had to fight back as it was not in her nature to simply lie down and roll over. Her father was like that and that’s what made him a good cop. It was in her blood.
“I told you to stay away from her,” Liza said.
“I know,” Kael said. “But she had it coming! She said some pretty harsh stuff to me.”
“Learn to take it, Kael,” she replied.
Kael couldn’t help but roll her eyes. “Whatever,” she said with a sigh and looked Liza’s latest crazy outfit over—black pants and a bright green caftan and the usual mounds of jewelry—before saying, “Well, what do I do now?”
“Leave well enough alone,” Liza replied.
“That’s what everyone says,” Kael said.