by Louise, Kara
Elizabeth lifted her eyes in confusion. “I am not laughing, Mr. Darcy. Pray, I do not know what you mean.”
“Last night… Mrs. Keller…”
Elizabeth tilted her head at him. “I fear I do not understanding your meaning.” A moment later, she gasped. “Oh, my!” Elizabeth drew her fingers up over her lips.
Darcy looked intently at her. “You remember what she asked you.”
“Yes, I do,” she whispered fervently. “But I assure you, the proposal I told them about was not yours!”
Darcy raised his brows in curiosity and drew back. “You received another proposal more foolish than mine?”
Elizabeth sent him a sympathetic smile. “It was Mr. Collins over whom we shared a laugh last evening!”
“Mr. Collins?” Darcy could not check his reaction. His eyes widened. “Mr. Collins? He made you an offer of marriage?”
Elizabeth nodded. “The morning after the Netherfield Ball. I refused him – of course – and he moved directly out of our house to the Lucases’ home, where Charlotte was more than ready to convince him to seek her hand in marriage.”
“Mr. Collins?”
“I am so sorry! I can only imagine how much humiliation you must have felt, thinking we were speaking about you!”
“Well, I cannot doubt that I deserve as much. I was as much of a fool in my entreaty as Mr. Collins most likely was.”
“Oh, pray, do not be so hard on yourself, Mr. Darcy,” Elizabeth said softly.
They stood silent for a moment, and then Darcy said, “Please, Miss Bennet, I do not want word of my identity to get out to my crew. Bellows is the only one who knows who I am. I would beseech you not to inform anyone of this until we are off the ship.”
“You have my word, Mr… Captain Smith.”
“I thank you. But, I would tell your father and cousin. Please, would you be so kind as to bring them directly to my quarters? I wish to explain all to you.”
“I shall.”
“I shall escort you to the dining hall and then meet you in my quarters.”
He walked her down to the stairs, bowed, and then walked away.
*~*~*
Elizabeth stood stunned for a moment, as she considered that what she just recently had come to suspect was true. Captain Smith was, in fact, Mr. Darcy! She knew something about why he had agreed to impersonate a pirate, and then to pass himself off as a ship’s captain, but there was a greater question pressing on her. Why had he not revealed his true identity to her?
She was barely able to put one foot in front of the other as she took the few more steps to the dining hall. All she could think about was how she had enjoyed the captain’s smiles, his kindness, and his brave acts of valour. As she reached up to open the door, she suddenly thought of being held tightly in his arms. She brought her hands up and covered her warm cheeks. And all along it was Mr. Darcy!
Could he still have feelings for her? She shook her head.
Not after everything she had said to him the last time they saw each other in Kent. She had lashed out at him in anger, accusing him of acting despicably, only to discover when she read his letter that she had foolishly believed Mr. Wickham’s lies.
Elizabeth turned to look in the direction he had walked, her mind in turmoil. He could not still care for her! Perhaps he had been hoping to humiliate her once she knew it was him. After all, she had refused an offer of marriage from the illustrious Mr. Darcy, one which most women would have yearned to receive.
To still her shaking hands, she clasped them together as she walked into the dining hall. She found her father and David playing cards with Mr. Joyner and Mr. Dillard.
“Your dance is over with the captain, is it, Lizzy?” her father asked. “I wish he had been a true pirate. It would have made the story much more entertaining!’
Elizabeth bit her lip. David looked up at her, and his brows narrowed. “What is it, Elizabeth? Is something amiss?”
Elizabeth let out a nervous chuckle. “No, but the captain wishes to speak with the three of us.”
“Now?” asked Mr. Bennet. “I have such a good hand!” He slapped a card down on the table.
“Yes, now, Papa.”
Mr. Bennet resignedly put down his cards. “So what is this matter that is so pressing?”
They stepped away from the others, and Elizabeth drew her father and cousin close. “You may not readily comprehend this at first, even I am somewhat mystified by the whole affair…”
“What is it?” David asked.
She turned to David. “It turns out that Captain Smith is not a pirate, not even a ship’s captain. He is actually a slight acquaintance of ours.”
“Who?” both men asked at once.
She turned to her father. “You will find this difficult to believe.”
“Come, Lizzy, pray tell! I am not getting any younger!”
“He is Mr. Darcy,” she said softly, watching her father closely to gauge his reaction.
A smile formed on one corner of his mouth, and he was soon laughing. “Certainly you jest, Lizzy!”
“I do not, Papa, but he does not wish for anyone else to know his real identity. He wishes to speak with us in his quarters. I believe he will explain.”
David stepped up alongside Elizabeth. “You are acquainted with Mr. Darcy? Of Pemberley?”
Elizabeth nodded. “His friend leased a country home near ours last year, and we found ourselves moving in the same circles.”
“Mr. Darcy?” he asked again.
Elizabeth stopped and faced him. “You seem more surprised that we are acquainted with Mr. Darcy than you are that he was Captain Smith!”
“I confess that I am equally astonished! Do you realize how sought after that man is? Both by women who will do anything to secure his attention and by men who hope that association with him will elevate their own status?”
“Well, he did nothing to elevate our status, did he, Lizzy?” her father said.
Elizabeth stared down at her feet as they walked the remaining distance to the captain’s quarters. Her stomach felt as if it were tied in knots. If only her father knew…
They reached the captain’s quarters, and Mr. Bennet gave a few taps on the door.
Darcy opened it and extended his hand. “Thank you for coming. Please come in and have a seat.”
The party stepped in, and their eyes quickly scanned the room, admiring the fine wood, bronze, plush rugs, and carpets.
“Quite impressive!” David said.
“It is very comfortable,” Darcy replied. “But please remember, it is not mine.”
“No, but it is fine, just the same.” Mr. Bennet turned to look squarely at Darcy. “My Lizzy has made a most astounding claim that you and Mr. Darcy are one and the same! Could this possibly be true?”
Darcy nodded. “It is as you say, Mr. Bennet.”
Mr. Bennet let out a laugh. “My, this adventure gets more entertaining with each passing hour!”
“I feel as though I owe you an explanation, but I beg you, once you step from this room, do not speak my real name. I would not want word of this reaching my sister before I am able to see her in person.”
“We understand, Mr. Darcy… Captain Smith,” Elizabeth said. She could barely bring herself to meet his eyes.
Darcy took in a deep breath and began. “There are two things I must explain. The first is why I impersonated Lockerly the pirate, and the second, why I chose not to divulge my true identity. I shall begin with the first.” Darcy’s hand went up, and he fingered his beard. “I had, unfortunately, neglected my appearance for some time and sequestered myself away from all that I held dear. I will not go into the reasons for this; suffice to say that I wished to be invisible as I stumbled through the streets of London, much like any other destitute reprobate. I was in a deplorable state!”
Elizabeth’s brow dipped in worry, and she chewed on her lip as she contemplated his words. She wondered whether she may have been the cause of his anguish. Could her re
fusal have affected him so profoundly? She had been certain that any regard he might have still had for her after her refusal would be soon driven away. Had she been wrong?
He went on to tell them much of what he had already told her. Of course, she had not known at the time his true identity, which added a whole new dimension to the story.
He concluded with how, when his ship encountered the merchant ship, he had to disclose to his crew that he was not Lockerly, hoping they would continue to abide by his directives. He was grateful that the men appeared willing to follow him whether he was a pirate or just a ship’s captain. Thus they were able to drive off the real Lockerly and his band of pirates and successfully rescue the captives.
Darcy clasped his hands together and looked down at them. “And now for the reason I did not wish my true identity to be known.” He took in a deep breath and shot a quick glance at Elizabeth. “I did not want anyone on board to know who I was because I am not particularly proud of how I neglected my person. I did not want those dearest to me to ever find out about this. I am not proud of it, and I felt that if anyone knew… if you knew… there would be a greater chance of someone finding out.”
“Your secret is safe with us!” David said.
“I am confident of that, and I am most grateful.”
“We owe you so much, Mr. Darcy,” David said. “I do not know what I would have done if Elizabeth had not been saved.” He reached out and clasped Elizabeth’s hand.
Elizabeth saw the twitch in Darcy’s brow before he stood up and walked to the door. “You owe me nothing, Mr. Adams. Every one of the crew played a part. I only wish we had been successful in capturing Lockerly.” He opened the door and stood to the side. “If you would please excuse me, I need to attend to some matters and then relieve Bellows at the helm.”
They stepped out, and Darcy closed the door behind them. David and Mr. Bennet chatted enthusiastically about such a novelty as encountering Mr. Darcy impersonating both a pirate and a sea captain. Elizabeth, on the other hand, only felt confused.
As they passed her cabin, Elizabeth stopped, prompting David to turn and ask, “Elizabeth, are you unwell?”
She nodded and brought her hand up to her forehead. “I am tired and have a headache. If you will excuse me, I think I will bid you both a good night.”
David squeezed her hand. “You have had a more taxing adventure than either one of us.”
As Elizabeth opened the door, David took a lit candle from the passageway. He handed it to Elizabeth, saying, “Take this and light one of the candles in your cabin. Then you can light the others as it gets darker.”
“Thank you, David.”
He nodded. “Get a good night’s sleep, Elizabeth. You probably need it. We shall see you in the morning.”
“Thank you. Good night. Good night, Papa.” She reached up and kissed her father on the cheek and walked into the cabin, quickly shutting the door behind her. While she looked with eagerness to a good, comfortable night’s sleep, she was also looking forward to some time alone to contemplate all that had taken place the past two days. Finding out that Captain Smith was actually Mr. Darcy was something that had her completely unsettled!
Chapter 17
When Elizabeth closed the door, the single candle she held cast a soft glow about the cabin. She was grateful no one else was there. She hoped the ladies would remain with their husbands for a little while longer to allow her some time to reflect on this startling revelation. She lit a wall candle and then blew out the one in her hand.
She sat down on the chair that was to be Mrs. Keller’s bed, leaning her head back and closing her eyes. Suddenly images of Captain Smith – Mr. Darcy – were before her. She heard his voice and saw the twinkle in his eyes. She remembered his kindness, bravery, and occasional teasing manner.
She grabbed a nearby pillow and wrapped her arms tightly about it. She felt her eyes pool with tears. Since first suspecting the captain’s true identity, she had made every effort to put on a calm – even smiling – face, but it was far from what she felt on the inside.
A tear trickled slowly down her cheek, and she drew a shaky breath as she buried her face in the pillow.
Why had he not entrusted her with the truth of his identity? She shook her head and narrowed her eyes, as if that would help her understand. A few months ago he had entrusted her with a troubling family secret regarding his sister’s near elopement with George Wickham. Did he feel that he could no longer trust her?
Elizabeth let out her breath in a long sigh. Just that morning he had held her close to him as they flung across one boat to the other on a rope! As she thought about being held so tightly by him, her head pounded with indignation, her mind tossed about in confusion, her cheeks flamed with mortification, and… what was it? She shivered as she contemplated this new sensation that coursed through her at the mere thought. The tumult of all these emotions assaulted her, vying for prominence.
Elizabeth dropped to the floor, pulling a blanket over her as she curled up on the rug. When she brought her head down to the pillow, an onslaught of tears trailed down her cheek. A few found their way to her lips, and she tasted their saltiness, much like the seas in which they sailed. She thought – as another tear made its way to her lips – that the sea and her tears would from this day forward be inextricably linked to Mr. Darcy.
*~*~*
Darcy returned to the helm, adjuring Bellows to go below and get some rest.
“Ye ken’t git rid of me without first telling me what happened with Miss Bennet. Did ye tell ’er during yer dance?”
“Tell her what?” Darcy asked with a blank expression.
“Ye know exactly what ye needed to tell ’er!” Bellows said, leaning in to him. Poking Darcy’s chest, he said, “Did ye tell ’er that yer Mr. Darcy?”
Darcy sighed and shook his head. “I had no need to. Miss Bennet had grown suspicious of who I was and spoke to me by name when the dance ended.” Darcy raised a brow at Bellows. “No thanks to you!”
“Me? I didn’t tell ’er who ye was!”
“No, it was not your fault. How were you to know that I once uttered those same words to her that I did to you?”
“What words?” Bellows asked.
“Disguise of every sort is my abhorrence.”
Bellows eyes widened, and he slowly nodded his head. “Aye! I told ’er ye said that.”
“Well, it sparked her memory and gave rise to her suspicions. I have since spoken with not only her, but Mr. Bennet and Mr. Adams, as well, telling them what happened, and admonishing them not to divulge my identity. To them I shall still be Captain Smith.”
“Well, I’m glad to hear that. I shall go below an’ git some rest. It should be easy sailing. The winds are mild, but the sails are catchin’ what little there is, movin’ the ship steadily along. Jest keep us headin’ in this direction. Furl the sails an’ lay anchor when darkness falls. Call me if ye need me.”
“I will. My thanks, Bellows.”
Darcy was grateful for the time alone. He trusted that the men manning the sails were fairly competent. Being at the helm would allow him time to think about the past two days. He gripped the wheel as he wondered what Elizabeth thought, knowing now that it had been him who had received her tender ministrations as she nursed his wound, teased her, watched her unabashedly, brazenly flirted with her… He shook his head. Yes, for him it had been brazen, as she had no idea of his true identity or his intentions. The mere thought of holding her in his arms powerfully stirred him.
He let out a huff and gripped the wheel tightly as he recollected holding her close to him as they swung from one ship to the other. He could not have done anything more indulgent of his desires, and yet he had asked her to trust him. He had convinced himself that no one else could be trusted to do it. Only he could do it.
He jutted out his jaw and fingered his beard as he considered his recent conduct. Elizabeth would certainly have every reason now to accuse him of ungentleman-like behaviour
.
As his mind turned over thought after thought and accusation after accusation, he noticed Mr. Bennet walking up to the helm.
“Good evening, Mr. Bennet,” Darcy said with a nod of his head.
“And a good evening to you, too, Mr… Captain Smith!” Mr. Bennet raised a brow and then let out a chuckle. “Not much of a wind, is there?”
“Not enough to get us to St. Mary’s before dark. But we ought to arrive first thing in the morning.”
“Good, good.”
“Mr. Bennet, do you mind if I ask you something?”
“No, no! Go right ahead!”
“I did not have the opportunity to inquire of Miss Bennet, but I wondered how you came to be in these seas? It is quite far from Hertfordshire.”
Mr. Bennet braced his hands on his hips and looked out to the darkening skies. “My sister lives on St. Mary’s, and we received word that she was in failing health. I wished to visit her and brought Lizzy along. She is the most adventurous of my daughters, and I must confess, my favourite.”
Darcy nodded his head. “Yes, she is… adventurous, that is.”
“I know a father ought not to have favourites among his children, but how can one not love her wit, good sense, and liveliness?”
Mr. Bennet let out a long sigh, which was echoed by Mr. Darcy.
“You know not how distressed I was that something might have befallen her with those pirates!” He turned to Darcy with eyes filled with intensity. “We owe you so much, Mr. Dar…, Captain Smith. I shall always be grateful for the risk you took to save my girl.”
“You owe me nothing, Mr. Bennet.”
Mr. Bennet let out a hearty laugh. “For that, I am thankful. I could never repay you what my Lizzy’s safety is worth!”
“She is a priceless jewel, I am certain.” Darcy took in a deep breath trying to calm himself before asking the next question. “And Mr. Adams?” He thought he heard his voice crack. “Does he reside on St. Mary’s?”
“David? No, he is my cousin’s son. My sister and his mother were always very close cousins and friends. He was there visiting with his parents from Staffordshire, and I must confess that he was quickly taken with Lizzy.”