by Lee, Nadia
“Was this something you suspected?”
“No. I actually thought the company was doing fine.”
“I see.” She took another sip of coffee. “The quarterly reports actually look pretty convincing on the face of it. But if you start digging into the line items…”
He nodded. “And none of us had any reason to do so.”
“Right. Jacob is family.”
She still hadn’t eaten most of her yogurt, even though she had to be starving. She’d only had half a sandwich for dinner—he’d checked. None of the leftover chicken parmesan or roast beef had been touched. She’d gone for the artificially flavored, sodium-laden turkey slices he’d bought for the rare occasions he wanted to indulge in culinary slumming. Hardly the kind of food someone with cholesterol problems should be having.
“You know, Kerri, this is your home too, even if it’s temporary,” he said.
She looked up with a small frown.
“You’re welcome to take whatever you want.”
Her mouth curved into a smile, though her eyes remained a little wary and uncertain. “Okay.” She drew the word out, and the intonation almost made it a question. “Thanks.”
“I want you to feel at home and relaxed.”
“Okay.” Her lips stretched further into a bigger smile, though her eyes were still somewhat distant. “Again, thanks.”
His hands curled. He hated her uncertainty, like she didn’t know how to share the penthouse with him or what to do with his suggestion that she treat it as her own home. He wanted her to be more at ease, take what she wanted because she could. Hadn’t she understood she could do that and more in the last few weeks? Yesterday in the study, he’d had to force her into demanding something from him with words. Explicitly. Selfishly.
Who was it that had hurt her?
People didn’t become this tentative in relationships without reason. Kerri was so beautiful, so smart, he wouldn’t have been surprised if she’d been a bit spoiled as well. He’d thought she’d be a tough nut to crack because she had so many options in her life. But perhaps he’d been wrong. She was difficult to crack because she was so protective of herself, wary of people trying to get too close to her.
Ethan was certain it wasn’t just some casual boyfriend who’d hurt her. It had to be someone who’d meant a lot more, someone from whom she had every right to expect love and protection.
Ethan wanted to kick whoever had wounded her like this. He wanted to—
She paused in the middle of spooning another mouthful of her yogurt. “What’s wrong?”
“What?”
“You’re glaring at that vase.”
“Nothing,” he said automatically. Then he shook his head and laughed. “Actually, that’s a lie. Everything.” He put his face closer to hers, until he could count her eyelashes. “You are unbelievably beautiful.”
A delicate rose tinted her cheeks. She smiled shyly. “Thank you. You look pretty awesome yourself in the morning.”
He kissed her mouth, her lips softening under his instantly. Just like that he was rock hard. “Finished with your breakfast?” he murmured.
“Yeah.”
He picked her up, his hands cupping her butt, as she put her arms around his neck and wrapped her legs around his waist. “I think it’s about time we shower. What do you say?”
Her answer was a laugh and a kiss.
Chapter Eleven
KERRI LOVED THE WAY Ethan masterfully carried her away. None of her previous boyfriends had been able to do it with this much style and shiver-inducing sexiness.
On the other hand…if he’d been anything like her exes, she wouldn’t have moved into the penthouse, job offer or no.
He kissed her, savoring her mouth like he would an exotic French dessert. She loved the taste of him, the sound of his voice, his aura of strength—it was like safety and power come to life, his muscles supporting her effortlessly as he moved them to the bathroom.
Ethan made her feel utterly beautiful and desired. And while he sometimes made her nervous—especially when he looked at her so intensely, his eyes memorizing everything about her—she loved the time she was spending with him.
A temporary arrangement.
She’d been so right to say yes. Although the deal had involved a job, it had been an easy one. And she’d needed a break and some time to pamper herself. What better way than with a gorgeous man who wanted to spoil her and give her unbelievable pleasure?
And the timing worked out so wonderfully, she told herself, almost insistently. She’d had enough time to enjoy herself and finish the job, but not so long that their private arrangement might get to be awkward.
She trembled, remembering what he’d done to her yesterday. She deepened the kiss, her clit pulsing with the memory. She was already slick and needy. God, she had it bad for him.
He pulled their robes off and stepped into the glass cube with shiny double showerheads. A deft twist of the gold and chrome handle, and perfectly warm water sprayed over them. He held her close and slowly rubbed their bodies against each other, full contact from chest to knees. A soft sigh escaped her parted lips as she savored the gentle friction between them. His pinky finger brushed the entrance to her pussy, and his eyes darkened. “You’re wet for me.”
“Yes,” she murmured. She waited for a sense of shame, but instead came desire and the satisfaction of knowing that it was her with him, and that it was his hard erection prodding her belly. She took it in hand, rubbing the plump head with her thumb.
He moaned. “Do that again.”
She did, with a little bit more pressure. His precum slicked her flesh, and she moved her hand slowly up and down along the thick length of him.
She studied him in the light of the day. Previously it’d been too dark or he’d been in charge. But this time, she planned to take her time.
He was thick enough that she couldn’t fully wrap her hand around him. Long enough that when he thrust into her, she felt like he could reach all the way to her heart. Dark blue-purple veins ran along the shaft, pulsing as she ran her fingers along the intriguing lines they created. He hissed out a breath but otherwise held still, giving silent consent to her ministrations.
She gripped him harder, trying to absorb his certainty about his place in the world. She wanted to be as sure as he was, as fearless and confident. She wanted to feel that she deserved the good things that happened to her, to feel that she mattered.
Her arms wrapped around his neck. He pushed her up against the slick ceramic tile walls. His mouth pressed against the juncture of her neck and shoulder, his breath hot and urgent.
Her legs went around him, and she moved until she was poised over his pulsing erection, wanting to take in a bit of his confidence and pride.
She took him inside her in one slick downward motion of her hips. He parted her, filled her until she thought she’d burst, then started pumping in and out, his hands tight around her ass. She loved his strength, the powerful movements that brought her so much pleasure she nearly wept.
He pulled out at the last moment, spilling his seed over her belly as she convulsed in his arms. His rough breathing on her neck made her shiver. She held him tightly, waiting for her legs to stop quivering.
Ethan sighed, shook his head in mock despair. “No condom.”
“Very irresponsible,” she murmured. “Very, very bad.” She should be shocked and dismayed at the admission. She was never irresponsible, never impulsive. Girls like that didn’t get approval. But right now, she felt too good to care. Besides, she wasn’t with Ethan for his approval or love. She was with him because this was what she wanted.
“I’m flattered,” he said. “Still, I guess this is the time to talk about, uh—”
She had the most absurd urge to giggle. They’d been doing the wild thing for weeks, and he wanted to talk about this now, when their arrangement was coming to an end? “Clean bill of health. You?”
“Yes. But let’s not repeat it again. I don’
t suppose you’re on the pill?”
She shook her head. “High blood pressure.” Her doctor’s attitude had been that the man could use a condom if he wanted her badly enough. “And the timing’s off. So no worries, I guess.”
Ethan nodded without commenting on her little slip about her blood pressure. She wasn’t sure why she’d felt the need to make him understand. It wasn’t like this was a relationship with real long-term potential.
His hands gentle, he washed her. She returned the favor, running her soapy hands down the hard slabs of muscles on his chest, shoulders and arms.
Afterward, they stepped out of the bathroom and walked to the bedroom, Kerri in front of Ethan. As they passed the bed she stopped short and went up on tiptoe, causing him to bump into her from behind. She wriggled her bottom against his cock. It hardened, and she looked at him over a shoulder. “Mmm. How on earth will you manage to have a productive day? You’re so tense.”
“True,” he murmured, his eyes wicked. “And since you’re the source of the tension, I think you should help me relax.” He picked her up and tossed her onto the bed, face down, the sheet shockingly cool against her skin. He covered her, the weight of his chest on her back.
“Ahhh,” she sighed into the mattress. “Yes.”
* * *
When Kerri opened her eyes, she was alone in bed. It was barely one. She yawned and stretched, a little surprised at herself. She didn’t normally nap. On the other hand, she didn’t normally have orgasms for breakfast.
She went to her room, put on a black shirt and dark jeans, and then sat on the bed. How in the world did people without jobs fill their time? She picked up her tablet and checked the news. Her fingers paused on the glassy touch screen when photos of Ethan and his date from the charity function showed up.
Elizabeth Pryce-Reed.
She’d grown into a gorgeous woman. Kerri remembered going to school with her one semester. There had been a fatal skiing accident in the area and Barron had pulled her out quickly, but Elizabeth had been sweet to Kerri, who had been new and awkward. If Ethan had to go to high society events with someone, it might as well have been her.
Elizabeth was suitable for someone like Ethan. She didn’t have a controlling family, odd dietary requirements or other crazy issues that required her to hide out and travel incognito to be free of her family’s influence. Instead she dedicated most of her time to charity and civic causes.
Kerri dropped the tablet on the bed. She wanted to hate the other woman, but she couldn’t. It wasn’t Elizabeth’s fault Barron was only capable of relating in ways that were based on controlling others.
Swearing, she got up. She didn’t want to ruin the day by thinking about her family. She padded outside, feet bare against the hardwood floor, and heard Ethan in his study.
“Oh yes, we will definitely discuss the matter.”
His tone held an edge sharp enough to draw blood. She pitied whoever was on the other side of the conversation.
He ended the call and turned around, a dangerous expression on his face. “Hey.” The harshness vanished instantly, replaced by warmth. It was amazing how well he could compartmentalize his life and emotions.
“You okay?”
“Yeah, yeah. Fine.” He smiled.
“Who was that?”
“An executive at TLD. I reviewed the documents you sent me, and you’re right. The company’s not doing well. Actually, it’s worse than I expected after your verbal report.”
She nodded sympathetically. What was there to say? “I’m sure it’ll get sorted out.”
“Don’t think it’s going to just happen. I’ll have to fix it.”
“I thought you didn’t manage the company.”
“I don’t.”
“Then why not let somebody else handle it?”
“Jacob—who’s supposed to be in charge—is gone. It’s left a big hole in the hierarchy.”
And a big scandal for the family to deal with.
“And things are a mess over at TLD,” Ethan continued. “The company provides for a lot of people—the employees, of course, our family…and quite a few of them need the money to make ends meet.”
The Lloyds’ definition of “make ends meet” was probably different from the general population’s. People in social circles as high as theirs tended to have exorbitant expenses. She’d seen how much her grandfather spent on fuel for his private jet alone.
“I can’t believe Jacob let it get this bad. He always said he didn’t want me meddling in the company, too many cooks and all that. But this is…damn it.”
“Where is he now?”
“Who knows? With some stripper.” Ethan clenched his hands. She wouldn’t have been surprised if he punched the wall or something, but he remained remarkably controlled. “He married this pole-hugger.”
She’d hoped her cousin had been mistaken—or at least the situation wasn’t as bad as he had said—but apparently it was just that bad. Actually worse, since no one had known TLD had been doing so poorly under Jacob’s management. “Does your family know how bad it is?”
“I’m not sure. That was Simon Caldwell on the phone. He’s the highest ranking executive after Jacob.”
“I know,” she said gently.
“Right, of course. Well, he acted like everything was peachy, except for the fact that Jacob was gone.”
“Why would he do that? He must’ve known that if you looked at the books you’d find out how bad things are.”
Ethan took a few restless steps, confined by the small room. “I don’t know. Maybe they were hoping I’d be too busy to bother.”
“Or too bitter to bother, if you and Jacob don’t get along.” Kerri knew first-hand how things could fester, silently or otherwise, in a family.
“I suppose.” Ethan pressed the heels of his palms against his eyes. “Bottom line, it doesn’t matter who screwed up or how I feel about it. I have to fix the situation. I can’t let my family suffer because of personal issues with Jacob.”
An unfamiliar lump started to form in her throat, and she swallowed before it could get any bigger. “You love your family.”
He gave her an odd look. “Well of course.”
“They’re lucky.”
“Lucky? That’s a strange thing to say. It’s my pleasure and my duty.”
A small fissure appeared in her heart. She couldn’t believe how he considered taking care of everyone who depended on him as natural as breathing. She wished for a brief moment that her family had felt that way about her too…that regardless of the men they’d lost because of her, they’d felt it was as natural as breathing to love her.
She turned away, focusing on the view outside. She didn’t want Ethan to see her this vulnerable. Their arrangement didn’t leave room for any kind of soul-deep connection. That was for more permanent relationships.
The sun shone, the world brilliant and optimistic around her. She dropped her gaze and noticed an “I Miss You” greeting card propped on the windowsill. Probably from a woman, given the ungodly amount of pink and lace on the expensive-looking paper.
As a child, Kerri had loved pink until she’d found a box full of boys’ toys in the garage one day. She’d decided to be more like the boy her grandfather had apparently wanted. Maybe if she’d shown more interest in baseball and soccer, Barron would’ve spent more time with her, paid more attention.
She blinked as the old ache resurfaced. Why was she even thinking about a pointless memory? Even if she’d been born male, her grandfather couldn’t have loved her.
With a great effort, Kerri relaxed her face until she managed a smile. Only then did she turn to Ethan. “Let’s go out.”
“What are you in the mood for?” he asked.
I want to be away from everything. I want to run from the pain. I want to forget.
“Anything. It’s too beautiful a day to waste, don’t you think?”
Chapter Twelve
HALF AN HOUR LATER they were at a small park. Her eye
s no longer held any hint of shadows. Ethan had seen them in the study, and for a moment time had ceased to flow as he wondered what he’d done to make her sad.
He hadn’t probed though. The way she’d turned away had demanded privacy.
They walked together, their fingers entwined. Her skin was cool, and he squeezed her hand, giving her a bit of his warmth.
Several yards away, young children played near a picnic table laden with food. Two thirty-something men in casual shirts and jeans were dealing with some burger patties on a grill while women of about the same age stood and chatted. A small boy cupped his hands around something, while his buddies circled him. They glanced at the lone girl and smiled the “we’re going to make a girl scream” smile. She didn’t miss a beat. She noticed the look and ran away before they could show her whatever it was they had. One of the women ran a hand gently over her head as the girl charged past, the affectionate gesture unconscious and natural.
Though their linked hands, Ethan sensed tension run through Kerri. She was gazing at the picnickers. Her eyes glistened, then darkened with an old pain.
A memory surfaced, unbidden; the way she’d looked at the christening party seven years before, the first time they’d met. In contrast to everyone else, grief had dulled her eyes as she looked at the baby.
And here it was again, children together with some long-buried pain. Had she lost a child dear to her? He doubted she’d had any of her own. She’d been so young at the christening party, and the kind of career she’d had didn’t exactly encourage motherhood.
Kerri blinked, and just like that her eyes were clear. If he hadn’t been watching her closely he might have never realized the sight of children had affected her at all.
“A quarter for your thoughts,” she said, her tone overly casual.
“A whole quarter? I’m flattered.”
“Hey, you know. Inflation.”
He debated telling her the truth, then decided against it. If she knew how much he’d noticed, she’d become even warier. “Just thinking that you’re beautiful.”