by Lee, Nadia
Ethan looked at Meredith, and his expression immediately changed. “Let me guess. Everyone heard what my asinine older brother said.”
Most of the people in the room looked everywhere but Ethan and Meredith. Kerri retreated half a step, not wanting to get further involved in the family conflict.
“Is Kerri going to take over TLD?” Meredith asked suddenly, her voice hoarse. Unshed tears stood in her eyes.
“We haven’t talked about anything like that,” Ethan said.
Kerri’s mouth dried, her hands suddenly clammy. She didn’t want to take over The Lloyds Development. The company was headquartered in Houston, and there was no way in hell she was moving to the city where her family lived. The whole point of her leaving Hong Kong and her investment banking career had been to avoid her family!
“One of our own always heads the company,” someone said.
“There’s that, too,” Ethan conceded.
Kerri let a breath out. Of course. TLD was a family business. Besides, if Ethan ever asked she could just say no. It was a free country.
“Then I want to do it,” Meredith said.
Gavin walked in just in time to hear this, and he and Ethan exchanged a quick look.
Meredith marched up to the two of them. She made a tiny figure next to Ethan’s bulk, but her voice rang through the room. “Don’t you dare! You think I’m stupid like Jacob?”
“Absolutely not,” Ethan said. “But Meredith, you don’t have the experience.”
“I know that!” she said. “I didn’t say I’d do it all by myself. There’s a whole board full of advisors, right? And you and Gavin can help when you have free time. Kerri, too.”
Kerri’s attention had started to wander, but now it snapped back. What?
“She helped you find out what’s wrong with the company, so she can help me make it profitable again. She has the experience, right? And she’s smart too.”
Ethan raised a hand, palm up. “Meredith, hold on. Kerri’s—”
“My position is temporary,” Kerri said quickly. Leaving her fate up to a couple of emotional siblings would not be a good move. This was her life.
“So?” Meredith turned to Kerri. “Don’t you want a permanent job?”
“I do, actually, but not in Houston.”
“What’s wrong with Houston?”
“Just…not where I want to be right now.”
“Fine. You can live in Virginia and advise me over Skype or something. You don’t have to move to do this job. This is the twenty-first century.”
Meredith thought there was more to Kerri and Ethan’s relationship than actually existed. But the only thing they’d ever discussed was when their relationship would end, not how they wanted to make it permanent. And it’d be unimaginably wrong for her to become Meredith’s advisor, because when you came down to it, Jacob was correct. When Kerri had first taken the job with Ethan, she hadn’t quite realized the enormous conflict of interest it would create. She’d thought it’d be a small way to pay Barron back for making her leave her old job.
But things were more complicated now, especially since Jacob had made the accusation, and the company wasn’t doing well. If it didn’t come out of the hole as quickly as the family wanted, they’d suspect she was sabotaging TLD or something.
Her own family had rejected her for being born and taking away their males. What would the Lloyds do if they thought she’d sabotaged their company?
She shook her head. “It’s not that simple. Meredith, please don’t take this the wrong way, but you’re going to be better off with someone who can be with you in person in Houston…and for a long time at that. The executive team is going to need some continuity, and I’m just not going to be able to give the results you want in the timeline you want.”
* * *
Ethan clenched his jaw. Meredith was talking about a job, but he knew Kerri was talking about their relationship. Clearly, she was still thinking of their deal as being good only for the short term.
It was as though the temporary nature of their relationship was some kind of lifeboat she was clinging to. But why? Their chemistry in bed had only gotten stronger, and they’d spent enough time together now that it was clear they had common interests, similar senses of humor. All the elements were in place, and yet she apparently had no faith that they’d stay that way.
She would never go to Houston, where the Sterlings and Wilsons lived. Ethan knew that her family was anathema to her. He’d brought her to the party to show her that she could be included in his family instead.
What a mistake. Everything had backfired spectacularly: Gavin had been rude, then Jacob had showed up and, as usual, been an outright asshole. And then Meredith had to start talking about a job—in Houston! It was like the universe was conspiring against him.
“No one’s going to fire you for not being able to help me turn the company around fast enough,” Meredith said. “I can’t do it alone.”
Kerri rubbed the back of her neck. “Let me think about it.” But Ethan knew there was nothing for her to think about. “And if I can’t do it, I’ll give you some other possible candidates for the job,” she added.
Bitterness gripped his heart. Ethan could see what was going to happen. Kerri would go home, contact a few highly qualified people—any of whom would do a spectacularly competent job at TLD—and send the list to Meredith with her regrets.
Would she do the same with him? Bye-bye, Ethan. Oh by the way, here is a list of possible replacement girlfriends. I think you’ll find that they’re all quite attractive.
Being good in business required one to be a realist. And Ethan was very good. Hard as it was to acknowledge, he’d fallen for a woman who wanted a definite out in her relationship with him. He’d had a glimmer of hope after the fiasco of her birthday party, but maybe the emotion had all been on one side: his.
Chapter Twenty-Three
THE PARTY WOUND DOWN QUICKLY. After the scene in the front yard, no one was in the mood to be cheery, and some people had long drives home.
“Jacob,” one woman said disgustedly as she left. “Plop him down in a candy store and five minutes later all the kids would be crying.”
Ethan was quiet on the way home. He was leaning in his seat, but there was tension in the way he gripped the steering wheel, the flatness of his mouth.
Kerri wished she could read his mind. Should she tell him about her family? Jacob had already made the ugly accusation—so maybe it was too late—but she had nothing to be ashamed of. She’d done her best for The Lloyds Development. Though Jacob had called her the enemy, she’d never considered Ethan or his family her enemies. People who mattered to Ethan mattered to her, too. How could she make him see that?
The drive was spent in silence. As they went up to the penthouse the tension was about to kill her. She rubbed the back of her neck and would have given anything for a big glass of Merlot to ease the tightness. When the door closed behind them, she turned to Ethan and blurted, “Are you angry with me?”
“No.”
Could he be any more terse? “I have to tell you something.”
“Okay.”
“I’m Barron Sterling’s granddaughter. David Wilson was my father.”
He didn’t even blink. “Yeah, I know.”
“Because Jacob told you. But—”
“No. Gavin found out first and told me several days ago.”
So that was why Gavin had been so cold to her. “I see. Why didn’t you say something?”
“What could I have said?” he asked mildly, as though he was talking about tomorrow’s weather or what to wear to work.
“Didn’t you wonder about what Jacob accused me of?”
“Not really.”
She blinked, suddenly deflated. All the arguments she’d been prepared to deliver vanished at his flat answer.
He spread his hands. “Look Kerri, this isn’t an issue for me. I have no reason to suspect you of anything. Whatever problems TLD has are due to Jacob,
and probably the Board of Directors, but not you.”
The burning sensation in her stomach eased. “Thank you for trusting me. I just… I didn’t know what to do at your mother’s, especially when Meredith asked me to be her advisor.”
Ethan finally looked like he was starting to relax. “Yeah, I’m sure it really put you on the spot. But look, I don’t want you to feel like you have to tiptoe around me or my family. If they don’t like you because of who you’re related to, it’s their problem, not yours.” He plopped down on the couch, and she joined him. He toyed with her hair. “Natalie told me you never said a word about your family to her.”
“Never. Um…did you tell her?”
“No. I didn’t know at the time.”
She snuggled into his warm, strong frame. “It’s not that I really want to hide anything from her. It wasn’t relevant. My family and I are completely estranged.” Except that Barron wants to see me all of a sudden.
“Some people might still have used the connection to further their career. You worked in finance.”
She shrugged. “Not much point when I couldn’t have brought in a single account using the family ties. It was easier to pretend I was just some ambitious young thing. Which, actually, I was.”
His fingers wrapped around the wavy end of her hair and tickled her bare shoulders. “Still… Seems like kind of a waste.”
She smiled. “If I’d let everyone know who my family was, you might not have hired me.”
At first she’d thought the job was a terrible idea, but accepted because she thought the position and the affair were temporary. Now she was glad she’d taken his offer. It was helping her overcome her fear and loneliness. She appreciated Ethan making her stronger and more sure of herself. Not in a professional capacity—she’d always known she was good—but in more personal and intimate relationships, where she used to wonder if she could measure up to some impossible standard she’d unconsciously set for herself to fit in and belong.
They hadn’t been together that long—only a few months—but whenever she thought of him her mind seemed clearer, her heart warmer and her insides more relaxed…albeit still hot with need. She didn’t know how long the sexual desire would last—maybe forever—but more importantly, sometimes she could see herself still feeling the way she did with Ethan twenty years down the road.
Was this love?
She’d always thought she’d know when she was in the throes of feverish passion. But now, sitting on the couch with their clothes on and their bodies flush against each other, she couldn’t help but think that this was the real thing, the kind of intimacy that wouldn’t vanish once the heated moment had passed. That they would endure all the endless trials of life, whether the two of them were sick or poor or old.
She wished she could tell if Ethan felt the same love, but a teeny voice of doubt in her mind said probably not. He was used to affection, unconditional acceptance and knowledge of where he fit in the world. He probably wasn’t overwhelmed by their relationship the way she was, and it was pretty clear that women falling in love with him was nothing unusual.
Well, it didn’t matter. So long as she had this moment with him.
“I’m sorry that the job caused you problems, though,” he said. “I’m really pissed off at Jacob.”
“Don’t worry about it.”
“Not an option. And I promise you, it won’t happen again.” He looked directly into her eyes. “Nobody’s going to hurt you.”
Somewhere inside her, rivers of feeling that had been icebound and stagnant cracked, broke into pieces, started flowing again. She turned in his arms and straddled him, pushing him back against the couch. His eyes darkened. He looked so masculine and beautiful in the sunlight, filtered through the pale curtains, and she kissed him deeply.
He was all hers.
His fingers let go of her hair and gripped her pelvis as she probed his lips, then boldly pushed into his mouth. The taste of champagne lingered there; she melted into him, one broad shoulder gripped in each hand. He seemed impossibly solid to her, a granite slab of strength and constancy.
The sun brightened his golden hair until it looked like he was on fire. She fitted herself more closely against him, her skin sensitive and tingling. Still holding the kiss, they undressed each other, rocking back and forth on the couch to get the clothes off. Every time Ethan shifted it sent a jolt of pleasure shooting up from between her legs.
He unzipped her dress and pulled it over her head. Then the panties were gone, leaving her bare to his gaze. Yet it was her heart that seemed open and vulnerable now, without the usual shield to keep it safe.
“You’re stunning,” he whispered. He reached for her breasts, cupping the soft mounds in his warm, large hands. He flicked his thumbs against the pointed tips, and she bit her lower lip to contain a moan.
One hand left to travel downward, fingertips running down her ribs and belly in a tortuously slow tour to where she was wet and quivering. He seemed to know her every secret, her every sensitive spot.
And for once she didn’t mind that the man she was involved with knew so much about her.
He wrapped his hand around her ass, while pulling on her nipple. She slowly moved her pelvis against his, wanting him deep inside. But she didn’t want the moment to end too soon.
She opened her eyes and looked at him. His were slitted, his blue gaze brilliant and dark. Passion had flushed his cheeks, and their earlier kiss had turned his lips swollen.
She studied every line of his face, listened to every breath he drew. She wanted to etch this moment forever onto her brain, so she’d never forget it.
After putting a condom on him, she slid onto him, completely ready, and found him so big it was slightly difficult to get him in.
She moved up and down, slowly and deliberately at first, then faster as the heat built. His breathing grew labored, his hands firmer and rougher on her body, marking her. She loved the possessiveness of his touch.
Yes, yes, I’m yours. Do whatever you will with me.
Tension coiled inside her, her muscles tightening more and more as he thrust harder, his hips surging upward.
She screamed her pleasure as he gritted his teeth and emptied himself. She slid forward and wrapped her arms around him, sated and happy.
* * *
Ethan felt Kerri go limp with sleep in his lap. Normally he would have given in to the urge to snooze a bit, too, but now he brooded.
She always responded so passionately, so openly…but was that the same as emotional openness and love?
The physical bond between them was fine, but without the heart it wouldn’t be enough to sustain a long-term relationship. Kerri had a habit of running away from pain. No one had to spell it out for him. It was obvious from what he’d been able to piece together.
Would she consider staying with him worth whatever pain her family would inevitably inflict on her when they found out about the two of them? Or would she vanish without a word? Ethan was certain they wanted her back in the fold. Pattington had ascertained that Kerri left Hong Kong around the same time Barron Sterling had left for Asia. Too much of a coincidence, especially combined with her discomfort at being in Houston.
His plan to show Kerri that she could be happy and content with him and the people around him had imploded. Damn Gavin and Jacob.
Ethan closed his eyes briefly, not wanting to get angry all over again. Kerri needed to see that what the two of them had was worth staying put for, that they could deal with her family as a team. She had to feel safe, and understand that he’d never let anyone hurt her.
But it was entirely possible that he could fail and Kerri would slip away again, this time forever. Icy fingers of dread took hold of his heart, because he was no longer certain he could do enough to hold on to her.
* * *
Later that evening, Kerri watched Ethan moving around the kitchen, a sharp knife in his hand. The black apron looked good on him, the first time she’d thought that about a ma
n and an apron. He’d put on a black polo shirt and faded jeans to work behind the island counter. The smells of chicken Parmesan coming together were tantalizing.
Already her mouth was watering. I’m like one of Pavlov’s dogs, she thought. Just seeing Ethan in the kitchen is enough to do it. She’d gain weight at the rate things were going, and would no longer be able to fit into her clothes.
The doorbell rang. Kerri rose. “You want me to get it?”
“Please,” Ethan said over a sizzling pan.
She opened the door to find a small, well-proportioned brunette with sharp eyes on the other side. High heels didn’t quite manage to bring her up to Kerri’s height, but a fashionable black raw-silk dress hugged the other woman’s hourglass body, and her posture was imperious. She tossed long curls over a shoulder and stared at Kerri like she would a bug.
Kerri straightened and put a hand on her hip.
“Who are you?” the woman said.
“Well, at the moment I’m the woman who’s going to decide whether or not to shut the door in your fa—”
Ethan appeared by Kerri’s side. “Catherine! What are you doing here?”
“What do you think?” She started marching into the penthouse. “I had to come here to see you. It’s not like my entire future is something we can talk about over the phone.”
Kerri stepped aside as the other woman swept past. So this was Catherine Fairchild Lloyd, member of the TLD Board and Ethan’s sister-in-law. Given Jacob’s bigamy, Kerri assumed the woman would be more…subdued. But no, she was strikingly good looking and obviously hyped up about something. Her golden brown eyes glittered like lasers, her cheeks flushed to a dark pink—and not from artful makeup.
The second the door closed Catherine wheeled around and said, “How could you, Ethan?” The fact that Kerri was standing there didn’t seem to faze her. “How could you tell everyone I’m an embezzler?”
Ethan sighed. “I guess Simon ran to you.”
“No. Jacob told me everything.”
He scowled. “You’re still talking to Jacob?”
“He called me this morning to rail at me about all the accounts and credit cards I closed. It’s the least he deserved considering what he’s done. But he had the last laugh in our little conversation, oh yes he did. He said you told everyone I stole from the company, and that’s why it’s doing so badly. I could hardly believe my ears when I heard it.”