by Vonnie Davis
“None of your damned business! You louse. You used me on the rebound after breaking up with Pilar. I was nothing more to you than a challenge, you callous cretin cowboy!”
He could see her in his mind: her eyes blazing, her cheeks blushed with anger and her pointy chin hiked the way it did when she was pissed. God, she was beautiful like that. “I love you, too, sweetheart.”
“Well, I don’t love you!” she shouted. Then she broke down and cried again. The sound of her despair caused an ache so severe in his heart it nearly took his breath away. He simply couldn’t bear being the cause of her tears. The urge to gather her close and murmur reassuring words to her was strong.
“Don’t cry, love. I’m sorry. I’ll do whatever it takes to get you back. Are…are you taking care of yourself?” Silence. Total silence. His Rachel was thinking. “May I call you again tomorrow?”
“No. No, I need time. Please leave me alone. Talking to you hurts too much. I can’t endure it.” Rachel ended the call. They were in love, yet they were destroying each other. He squeezed the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. Face it, Blackhawk—you brought this on yourself by not making things clear to Pilar. If you’d been upfront with her about meeting another woman, she wouldn’t have come to the hospital, and Rachel wouldn’t be crying right now.
“Seems I’ve got some groveling to do. I’ve really messed things up.”
“I’m surprised she gave you that long to talk. I’d love to know what she called you.” Sunny’s lips twitched as if she were amused. No doubt she was trying to lighten his mood.
“A ‘yellow-bellied, blue-balled weasel,’ for one. God, I love that woman. I never told you I dreamed of Rachel’s eyes and her laughter for three nights before I met her out on Longhorn Road.”
“Really? Wait. You’ve been having dreams like Daddy used to? How long? Why haven’t you told me?”
“The night after Dad died, I dreamed of you crying. Somehow I could sense your heart was broken. That’s why I pushed you so hard after his funeral to find out what was happening with your marriage.”
Storm reached for her hand and intertwined his fingers with hers just as they’d done as children whenever they were going to share confidences; just as he suspected they’d probably done in the womb. His dark eyes turned toward hers. “I dreamed about your cancer, too.” Sunny’s eyes filled with tears. “Dreamed of you being thin, frail, and bald.”
“Is that why you insisted I see the doctor when I was so tired all the time and had that weird feeling of fullness under my ribs? That’s why you made me promise to ask for a complete blood work-up, isn’t it?”
“Yes.” He squeezed her hand, brought it to his lips and kissed her knuckles. “Those were scary times.” She nodded and swiped at a tear. Her diagnosis was his diagnosis, too, for to lose his twin would be to lose a large part of himself.
Sunny cast dark, dewy eyes on him. “I will beat this, you know.”“How are you feeling, sister?” She looked so much better since Rachel’s arrival. Her skin had a healthy glow to it, her eyes were bright again and her hair was slowly growing back. Her scalp was almost completely covered now. “How will Rachel’s leaving affect you?”
“I don’t think it will at all, physically. Even though she was in a hurry to leave, she went over a daily schedule for me for the next month.”
“She’s a very caring person. That’s one of the many things I love about her—her devotion to her patients.”
Sunny nodded. “Rachel’s the best. She promised she’d send another nurse. We still e-mail each other every day. I’m handling her leaving fair enough, but poor Sawyer is so sad with his Unkie Storm and his Wachel gone. He doesn’t understand. Bedtime has turned into a nightmare again.”
“After his bath tonight, have him call me. I’ll talk to him and then tell him a bedtime story until he falls asleep.” He smiled. “E-mail Nurse Rachel, see if you can hire her to take care of me so I can come home as soon as possible for Sawyer.”
“You’d use a child to get her back?”“I’d use anything. You’re looking at a desperate man.”
Sunny laughed and slapped his arm. “Big jerk!” Storm winked at her. He’d missed their talks and shared confidences. She really was looking like her old self, which relieved him greatly. She seemed happier, no doubt because she and Jackson seemed closer than ever. He enjoyed seeing her more animated and beaming a smile. “Tell me about the dreams you had of Rachel, brother.”
Their hands were joined again, fingers intertwined—their sharing position. “They started three nights before I saw her out on Longhorn Road. Same dream three times.” He slid his gaze to hers. “Did Rachel tell you we’d met before she arrived at the ranch?”
Her eyes twinkled with mirth. “The naked cowboy? The kiss? Oh yeah. Your behavior that night was so out of character for you. I couldn’t believe it when she told me.”
“I’d been so tied up in knots over my reoccurring dream of this blue-eyed, blonde-haired woman with those full, sensuous lips laughing in that low, sultry way Rachel has…”
“Only you didn’t know at the time who you were dreaming of.”
“Right. When I walked over to her car that night, and those big blue eyes looked up at me, I couldn’t believe it. Same eyes, same enticing lips. Same long hair, only she had it in a braid that night. I made a remark that pissed her off and she drove away. I felt like a part of me was leaving and I just stood there watching her go, not knowing what to do. I willed her to come back. Chanted an old Comanche prayer Dad taught me.”
“What happened?”
“She turned the car around and came back. Soon as she stopped, I grabbed her arm as if I could keep her with me. At that moment, my recent breakup with Pilar was the farthest thing from my mind. There was only the blue-eyed stranger.” He looked away. “Since then, there’s only been her.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Four days and forty million tears later, Rachel eased her new silver Rogue next to the curb in front of sixteen-twelve Calvin Court in Yazoo City. She was home. Comfort was here. So was the realtor, she noted, seeing the realtor logo on a black Mercedes parked in the driveway, which was a good thing. This would save her a call. She wanted to take the house off the market.
Now that Kyle was no longer a threat, she could move home again. She’d close down her Web site for a while, stop doing private nursing and apply at a couple of nearby hospitals. Maybe she’d eventually look into teaching some nursing classes.
Then again, maybe she’d just lock the doors, go to bed and pull the covers over her head until next June or July, maybe forever. Right now, she didn’t care about much of anything. Depression had moved into her heart with a five-piece set of luggage.
She slammed the door on her mini-SUV and surveyed the yard. Some of the shrubbery needed trimming. She sighed. Yeah, like she cared.
“Rachel, what perfect timing!” The realtor strode down the sidewalk, her face beaming. Behind her were a dazed woman and three bouncing children. “We have a contract on the house.”
“You do?” This couldn’t be happening.
“Yes. Isn’t that great? This is Anna Beth Richardson, who loves the house. Anna Beth, this is Rachel Dennison, the owner.”
“Nice to meet you, Anna Beth.” Rachel shook her hand. Her gaze traveled to the three children running through the yard. “So you like the house?”
“It’s perfect. I’ve been saving every penny I can for a down payment, which hasn’t been easy with my son’s asthma. His medicine’s been so expensive. Still, this is doable. I can swing this, and the yard and schools are great. I’ve been looking at houses like crazy, hoping I could get us moved before school starts.”
Rachel stared into the woman’s eyes and sensed she was a good person, a hardworking woman, and better still, a good mother. She made a snap decision. After all, not all memories here were good ones. Kyle had beaten her several times in this house. There was new drywall in the living room where he’d run his fist th
rough it in a rage.
“I know you’ll love it here. This is where I grew up.” Her eyes focused on her bedroom window; snippets of childhood memories flashed by. “It’s a family house.”
After accepting Anna Beth’s offer and agreeing to a settlement date, she got back in her car and sat. She’d just signed a contract to sell her home. The tears started, and she laid her head over the steering wheel and sobbed. Why doesn’t anything turn out the way I plan? My career’s a mess. I have no home. The guy I love is… Her phone rang, interrupting her crying jag, and she snatched it from her purse. “Hello.” She wiped her nose with the back of her hand and sniffed.
“Mouse, what’s wrong? I just got this sudden feeling. Are you okay?” It was Storm. She should tell him her life was none of his concern. The jerk. If he’d been the man she’d thought he was, this wouldn’t be an issue. She’d be with him, Sawyer, and the whole family on the ranch she’d come to love.
“No, I’m not okay. You broke my heart. Haven’t I asked you not to call me?”
“This is only my second call, Rachel. I’m trying to honor your wishes, but it’s damn hard.” Tension was evident in his voice. “I’m worried about you.”
She pressed the disconnect button and tossed the phone out onto the street. Before she knew she was going to do it, she started her SUV and drove over the phone. Then just for good measure, she shoved the gearshift into reverse and backed over it again. She was getting a new phone number and a new job and a new place to live. Wasn’t that just fine and dandy?
An hour later she was ringing Grace’s doorbell.
“Hey, come in.” Grace’s eyes widened. “What have you brought?”
“Chinese and cheesecake. You can’t come to a slumber party without food and drinks and stuff.” She breezed into the tidy apartment. “You do still have off tonight, don’t you?”
“Yes. I’m off for three days, then back on for four.” Grace started rummaging through the bags Rachel had deposited on the kitchen counter. “Diet soda, cookies, pudding cups, taco chips and salsa. What Chinese food did you get?”
“Your favorites, of course.” She planted a kiss on Grace’s cheek. “Won-ton soup for me.”
Her friend opened the bag of chips and popped a couple in her mouth. “Good girl,” she mumbled with her mouth full. “We haven’t had a feast like this since…”
Rachel slung her arm across her best friend’s shoulders. “Since before Kyle.” She opened a pudding cup and reached for a spoon. “I have a contract on my house.”
“I thought you were going to take it off the market.” Grace pulled plates and silverware out of the cabinets and drawers. “Where will you live? Hey, you want to move in with me? I’ve got a spare bedroom. It’d be like old times.”
She licked chocolate pudding off the back of the spoon. “Could I? Just for a couple months, until I decide what I’m going to do with my life. I need to make plans and hunt for another house. Oh, before I forget, I have a new number.”
Grace reached for her cell. Her finger was poised over the keyboard. “Let me have it.” Once she had the data saved, she put a hand on Rachel’s arm. “Now, suppose you tell me why you got another number. You don’t have to worry about Kyle anymore, the lousy creep. Do you know he pawned my grandma’s ring? Thank goodness the police have it now. I’ll get it back—eventually.” She carried plates to her coffee table. Rachel brought drinks and the bag of Chinese.
“Storm called me this afternoon. At the time, I was crying, upset over the house selling and realizing I’d have to deal with one more upset in my life. My cell rang and it was Storm. Wondered if I was okay. Said he got a bad feeling about me, so he called.”
Grace spooned fried rice onto her plate. “A bad feeling? What, is he psychic?” She opened a container of sweet and sour chicken.
Rachel tugged the lid off her soup. “He’s half Native American and says he has dreams sometimes about the future. Claimed he dreamed about me before he ever laid eyes on me, if you can believe that. ’Course he said he loved me, too. The cheating cowboy said a lot of things. He said he was through with Pilar. He said he wanted to marry me.”
“Oh, this is so good.” Grace held a piece of chicken at her lips. “Tell me about him. What is it about this guy that attracts you?”
“Everything.” Rachel lifted a spoon of broth to her mouth, remembering. “It’s more than his looks. He’s earthy, in tune with his ranch and animals.” She laughed. “He talks to his horses like they’re his best buddies. The ranch is doing well, so he obviously knows what he’s doing. His ranch hands are very loyal because he treats them well. You should have seen him when Eduardo got hurt. He even went by the man’s mother’s house to take her to the hospital. He’s one of the most caring men I know.” She set her soup down, her appetite suddenly gone. “I miss him so much I think I’ll lose my mind.”
“Then go to him. Work things out. How do you think he feels about you?”
“When I’m with him, he makes me feel like I’m a pitcher of iced tea and he’s a man dying of thirst. He’s so intense, so focused. He can go from fierce to tender in a heartbeat. You should see him with his nephew.” She wiped a falling tear. Every part of her wanted Storm Blackhawk, desired him beyond all else. Could she believe what he’d said, that he’d told Pilar about her? Was it truly over between Storm and the cool, sophisticated woman?
She looked at Grace. “I may have another problem.”
“Oh?” Grace was clearly enjoying her food. She’d always been able to tell Grace anything. How would she react to this possible development?
“I might be pregnant.”
Grace’s head whipped up, her brown eyes widened in surprise.
“I’ve got a home pregnancy test in one of the bags in the kitchen.”
Two pairs of apprehensive eyes watched for results on the plastic stick. “Why is it taking so long?” Rachel felt as if her heart were doing a drum solo. The rest of her life hinged on the results.
“I see something.” Grace was leaning over Rachel’s shoulder to get a better view. She turned her head and looked at Rachel. “Congratulations, girlfriend. You’re pregnant.”
“Help me sit down. I don’t think my legs will work.” Pregnant. She’d missed six pills and now she was pregnant. A seemingly intelligent woman, twenty-seven years old with a master’s degree, no less, was dumb enough to get pregnant. No job. No home. No husband. And a baby on the way. “I need chocolate.”
“You’re a diabetic, remember?”
She collapsed onto the commode lid and grabbed Grace’s hand. “I’m pregnant and I want chocolate. Do you hear me?”
****
Storm’s eyes snapped open. The clock on his nightstand read two twenty-two. He smiled at the significance. He’d just dreamed of Rachel. She was awkwardly walking toward him, her eyes shining and her abdomen large with her pregnancy. She was carrying his twins.
He wanted to call her, just to hear her voice. But she’d asked him not to. If he didn’t honor her request, he’d be no better than Kyle. Yet what was he to do? He had to keep her mind on him; had to let her know his mind was on her.
The brief e-mail he sent her every morning was all he dared do without crossing the line she’d drawn in the sand. He had to respect the boundaries she’d set, even if it was killing him. His hand reached out, and he slid his palm over the pillow he’d come to think of as hers. Memories flooded back of the morning they’d loved each other here in this bed. He hardened with need for her and groaned her name.
Slowly he got out of bed; a twinge of pain from his incision snagged his attention for a moment, taking it off the pain of unfulfilled sexual desire. “Rachel, love, come home to me.” He shook his head once and wondered how many times his dad had uttered the same request for his wife, Sunny’s and his mother. Life played cruel tricks sometimes. Love was never easy.
He donned a pair of old sweatpants and opened his bedroom door to the hallway. Maybe if he got something to eat, he could fall b
ack to sleep. He would dream of Rachel and his babies again.
It was good to be home. Storm padded into the kitchen and looked into the refrigerator. Hospital food had taken a good twenty pounds off his frame. The overhead light snapped on, and he pivoted. “Momma Noella, I’m sorry. Did I waken you?”
She tugged on the ties of her bathrobe. “I was awake, writing an e-mail to my sister.” She shrugged. “Thinking of the little one. Worrying.”
Storm pushed a bowl of salad aside to reach a slab of roast beef left over from supper. “She won’t be the little one for long.” He turned and wiggled his eyebrows. “I had a dream.”
Noella tugged a bag of rolls from the breadbox and set about making them both a sandwich. “You and your dreams. You sound just like your father.” He snatched a slice of roast beef from the roll. She slapped his hand, and he smiled that cheeky grin he knew, from years of experience, would rankle her.
“I dreamed Rachel was pregnant with twins.” He shoved in the slice of meat and chewed.
“You dreamed she was pregnant? No!” She regarded him with a raised eyebrow. “You have much work to do, young man. I want my little one back. She belongs here with us, her family. I want you married first.”
Storm slung an arm over Noella’s shoulder. “I want us married, too. I ache with need for her. I need to see her smile, to see her chin hike up when she gets riled, to hear her laughter, and watch her with Sawyer. She’ll make a great mom, won’t she? Just think, two little bambinos for you to spoil. My bambinos.” He wanted Rachel here with him with fierceness akin to his need for air. Just how was he going to achieve his objective?
****
Rachel was still coming to grips with everything, especially impending motherhood. A baby. She smiled. Something she’d found herself doing a lot in the past twenty-four hours, now that she’d gotten over the shock. For all its complications, having a baby pleased her on some deep level. There were decisions that required her attention, but with a baby on the way, she had to think things through carefully and logically.