by Leah Atwood
“I know, but it’s hard.” She closed her eyes, imagined a different world. “Even now, I feel so stupid for breaking down in front of you and wondering when you’re going to be sick of me.”
“I’m still here, aren’t I?” Wiping a stray tear from her lashes, he kept his eyes locked on her. “That’s what friends are for. And we’re more than friends, so I’m not going away unless you want me to.”
“Stay. Please.”
His hand left her cheek. He matched his palm flat against hers then wove their fingers.
“I’m so scared, Luke.” Her head drifted to his shoulder again. She wasn’t ready to give up the strength she drew from it. “What if Evan’s…” The word wouldn’t come out.
“My mom always said ‘don’t borrow trouble’.” As he spoke, his finger traced circles on her knuckles. “She’d quote a verse from the Bible that says, ‘For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you’.”
“Dad always quotes that one too.”
“Because it’s a good one. No one can guarantee outcomes in life, but God promises he’ll be with us through the valleys.”
“Thank you for that reminder.” She couldn’t let her thoughts drift to the what-ifs with Evan, but the crushing panic had subsided. “I should go back inside, see how Mom and Dad are faring.”
His slow smile gave her the support she needed to stand. Thank you, Lord, for bringing Luke to me, especially at this time.
Chapter 7
Tuesday morning, Kate sat at her desk, staring at her closed office door. Three days had passed since her family received word that Evan was missing. There’d been no updates, and it had since made national news.
Her cell phone rang, and she dreaded answering the call. If it was another reporter asking for an interview, she’d throw the phone across the room. In their quest to get a human interest story sure to boost ratings, the reporters all seemed to forget that she was a real human. A sister worried for her brother’s life and those of the men whom he was with.
They all asked how she felt, and she’d stopped answering. No one wanted to hear that she felt like someone had ripped out her heart, but she had no choice but to keep living without an essential organ. The not knowing was the worst, but she preferred that to receiving bad news.
If not for Luke’s unwavering support, she’d be lost. He stayed with her in the evenings until propriety dictated he leave, and he talked her down when her fears overwhelmed her. When they were together and her phone rang, he’d screen her calls and did countless other things to make her life easier during this time.
Luke was everything she’d always wanted, and she loved him. If there was a bright spot in any of this, it was him.
The ring tone on her phone blared again, this time the one dedicated to Sophie’s house and cell number. She gladly took that call. “Hi, Sophie.”
“Hi, Kate. Do you have a minute?”
“Always for my best friend. What’s up?”
Sophie laughed. “Do you have plans tomorrow?”
“It’s the last day of work before Christmas, but the office closes at one. Why?”
“I talked to Bryce last night and told him I need to be there with you.” Sophie must have been holding Ethan because Kate heard his babbling. “He agreed, and we decided to spend Christmas in Oden Bridge.”
“Are you serious? You better not be kidding.” Excitement found a place among her sorrows.
“Completely. School let out yesterday for winter break, and we’re on the road now, well technically at a rest stop.” There was a muffled sound and Sophie came back. “Bryce says hi.”
“Tell him I said hi back, but most importantly, tell me when I get to see you.”
“Gram offered to babysit tomorrow night and do old-fashioned Christmas crafts with Gracie so Bryce and I can drive into Lafayette. What do you think about a double date? I want to meet Luke.”
“Me too,” Kate heard Bryce yell in the background.
Sophie laughed again. “Is it a date?”
“Sounds great, but let me run it by Luke, though I’m sure it will be fine.”
“Call me back and let me know then we’ll decide where and what time.” Sophie’s voice dropped. “Bryce has all of Nashville praying for Evan.”
“Thank you.” Emotion clogged her throat. “I jump every time the phone rings, afraid it will be bad news.”
“I’m sorry.” Sophie’s compassion reached through the phone. “Is there anything I can do?”
“You’re doing more than enough. I can’t wait to see you.”
“Tomorrow. Bryce is waving that it’s time to hit the road again. I’ll call you later to confirm details, but my phone is always on in the meantime.”
After ending the call, Kate stood from her desk and stretched. She had a small amount of guilt for not giving Sinclair Industries one hundred percent today, but she needed to move around. Sitting behind her desk only made her think more, and that was the last thing she needed to do. Maybe she should have listened to her boss and taken the day off.
No one would hold it against you, he had said.
But she’d steadfastly refused. My mind needs to stay busy or it will wander into dangerous territory.
She caught a glimpse of the clock hanging on a wall outside her office. Eleven o’clock—close enough to lunch time. Grabbing her purse, she left the room and strolled to Luke’s office. Averting the sympathetic stares of others, she kept her eyes in tunnel vision. Her co-workers were generous with their outpouring of support, but the constant weak and forced smiles flicked her way were too much to handle, almost as bad as the barrage of how are you. She needed work for the mental escape, not a constant reminder.
Luke’s office was on the first floor also, but at the far end of the building. She passed through a quad of cubicles, to the row of offices along the wall. Knocked on Luke’s door.
“Come in.” A second after the door opened, he looked up. A smile curled his lips. “Lunchtime already?”
“A little early, but I couldn’t focus.”
His eyes darted to the computer screen then back to her. “Can you give me five minutes to finish this?”
Nodding, she sat in the only other chair in Luke’s office. The room had nothing more than necessary. He was a minimalist at work as well as in his home. What he did have, was immaculately kept with nothing out of place. It was a stark contrast to her office—that while perfectly ordered, had been personalized to make it her own. A fern on a plant stand. Two Monet reproductions. Even an electric candle simmer pot. Unlike Luke, who worked best without the distractions, Kate found the added touches increased her productivity by increasing her morale while at the office.
“Are we going out or staying in the break room?” Luke closed a ledger on his desk.
“Out,” she said, a bit too emphatically, then sucked in a breath. “I need the fresh air.”
“Five dollar gumbo day next door?”
“Perfect.” There was something about a bowl of gumbo on a cold day that soothed the soul.
He grabbed his coat, and they left. Outside, Kate shivered without the warmth of her own coat which she’d forgotten in the office. Luke slipped out of his and positioned it over her shoulders. Inhaling, she delighted in the muskiness of his cologne that lingered on the wall.
There was a line at the restaurant with a fifteen-minute wait for a table. Two benches for waiting patrons were already full, and the only available spot was by the door. Every time somebody came in so did a cold whoosh of air.
“You can have your coat back.” Even as she offered, she snuggled into it. The comfort came more from the fact it belonged to him than the actual heat it provided.
“Keep it for now. I’m fine.” His posture was relaxed, and he didn’t seem fazed. Reluctant to give it back yet, she didn’t press the issue.
Once they had a table, Kate broached the double date. “Do you have anything scheduled for tomorrow?”
>
“Just shopping for a few last minute gifts.”
“How would you feel about going on a double date?” A line of steam rose from the coffee mug a waitress set on the table. Kate added two pink packets of sweetener and stirred.
“With who, Tony and April?” he asked, naming off another couple who worked at Sinclair Industries with whom they’d eaten lunch on several occasions.
Kate shook her head. “Sophie and Bryce.”
His eyes were impassive. “I didn’t know they were in town.”
“It’s a last minute surprise for me.” She sipped her coffee. “Sophie knew I could use another friend.”
“That’s great.” The subtle bob of his head and narrowing of his eyes said otherwise.
“If you don’t want to, Sophie and I will make it a girls’ night.”
“It’s fine.” The tight line of his lips curved into a thin smile. “What time?”
“I have to call her back and decide.” She stared at him, deciding if he was honest. “If you really don’t want to, I understand, but you’ll like Bryce. He’s down to earth. Very high-energy, but levelheaded and a good guy. If you didn’t know beforehand, you wouldn’t be able to tell he’s famous.”
“Bryce isn’t the problem, Kate.”
“Then what is it?” Prickles of anxiety crawled on her arm, giving her goosebumps. Insecurities resurfaced.
“I don’t want to intrude on your time with Sophie. I know you don’t get to see her often.” His hand circled his coffee cup upon which he focused his gaze. “You’ve seen me almost every day this month. You haven’t seen her since Thanksgiving.”
“You and Sophie are the two friends most dear to me.” She searched out his gaze. “I want the two of you to meet, but more importantly, I need you by my side. You get me and keep me grounded in a way no one else does.”
“All right.” The smile reached his eyes at last. “Call Sophie and finalize plans.”
Chapter 8
“Remember in seventh grade when Greg Andrus brought a live snake to class and put it in Harmony David’s desk?” Sophie covered her mouth as the laughter spilled out.
“They’re engaged now,” Kate said between her own spurts of giggles. “As of June, I think.”
“No way.” Sophie’s eyes widened. “They hated each other for years.”
“Right? Harmony told me she hadn’t spoken to him in ages, but she bought a house last year, and wouldn’t you know, guess who her neighbor was?”
Leaning back in his chair, Luke exchanged an amused grin with Bryce. Neither had gotten in a word since the last bite of food was consumed fifteen minutes ago. Sophie and Kate were on a humorous trip down memory lane, and Luke didn’t mind a bit. It pleased him to see Kate having fun, able to put the worries of Evan aside for a short time.
He hadn’t seen a frown on her face in hours, not since before they left Lafayette. Kate had decided that getting out of town would be more beneficial for her than Bryce and Sophie driving into Lafayette. After the work day had ended early, they’d driven to Gram’s house in Oden Bridge and spent the afternoon there making Christmas cookies.
Luke hadn’t decorated Christmas cookies in twenty years—he was nine the last time he could remember participating in the tradition—but he’d enjoyed himself. The afternoon had rejuvenated the Christmas spirit that had diminished since the news of Evan’s MIA status came to light. He’d also gotten to know Bryce, who, true to Kate’s promise, was just like any other person and not pretentious at all as one might expect from a celebrity.
“Would anyone care for dessert tonight?” The waitress at Bayou Bits showcased a sugar-laden tray.
No one did.
“Just the check,” Bryce said.
The waitress shook her head. “Dani said this one’s on the house and don’t go without saying bye.” She turned and walked away, leaving Bryce open-mouthed.
Luke was certain he’d been about to protest. “Dani’s your cousin, right?” There’d been, so many names introduced in conversation that he had a hard time keeping them straight.
“Yes.” Bryce laid money on the table for a tip.
“She’s a great cook.” Luke left a fair share of tip money as well. “The food was well worth the hour drive here.”
Kate took a final sip of her diet soda. “We’ll have to come back soon.”
He returned the smile she gave him. “Just say the word.”
Sophie stood. “I have to use the ladies room. I’ll be right back.”
“Me too.” Kate joined her, and they disappeared.
Bryce wagged his brows. “You know they only left to have a conversation about you.”
“Yeah.” Luke shrugged. “It was pretty obvious.”
“If it eases your mind at all, Sophie gave you her seal of approval on our way over.”
Laughing, Luke glanced toward the restrooms, curious what Kate and Sophie were saying about him. “Good to know.”
“You got off easy. Before my first date with Sophie, Kate told her to take a picture of my license plate and send it to her in case I abducted her.” Bryce rolled his eyes but also smiled.
“Sounds like something Kate would say.”
Sobering, Bryce crossed his hands on the table. “How is she holding up behind the scenes? Sophie’s really worried about her.”
Luke leaned back and rested one arm casually on the table. “She has her ups and downs, but Kate is stronger than she realizes.”
“And still no word on Evan?”
“No.” He cast a second look to the restrooms before saying anything else, only continuing when he didn’t see Kate. “I shouldn’t have, but I even called my dad yesterday to see if he could find out anything.”
“Why your dad?” Bryce’s eyebrows knitted.
“He’s a colonel in the Marines.”
“Ah. What did he say?”
“Officially, nothing.” Luke sighed, wishing he’d never made the call.
Bryce crooked a finger under his chin and narrowed his gaze. “What did he say between the lines?”
“When he called back this morning, he implied there wasn’t much hope of finding survivors.” A chill shook him and he swallowed.
Even Bryce was visibly shaken and frowning. “You didn’t tell Kate, did you?”
“No.” His head shook with vehemence. “Don’t tell Sophie, either. I don’t want it getting back to Kate.”
“You have my word.” Bryce grabbed his phone. “What’s your number? I’ll send you a text with mine.” Luke recited the numbers and Bryce typed on his screen. “Let us know if there are any updates. Anything we can help with, tell us and we’re there. Sophie and Kate, they’re like sisters.”
“Simply having Sophie here has helped Kate a lot. Thanks for making it happen.”
“It’s not purely altruistic. I’ll take any excuse to spend a holiday with Gram and my family here.” Bryce shrugged. “Regardless, you do what’s needed for friends and family. Sophie’s parents were completely supportive of pushing back our trip to see them so she could be here with Kate. I just wish there was more we could do.”
Night approached and Luke sat up when the restaurant’s dining room came alive with strings of white lights wrapped around garland on the walls’ perimeter and instrumental carols played peacefully through the speakers. “You can keep praying.” His mouth twisted into something not quite a smile. “It is the season of miracles, right?”
“Yes, it is.”
Chapter 9
Christmas Eve morning, Kate woke startled from a nightmare. She dreamt about Evan, trapped, bruised and broken. He called out for her, but she couldn’t find him. Every step she took was met with another obstacle.
“It was only a dream. It was only a dream.” She repeated the chant until her heart rate returned to normal.
With swollen eyes and leaden feet, she trudged to the kitchen. She had no appetite but brewed a pot of coffee. Her motions were mechanical, automatic. When the coffee was ready, she fixed a cu
p, then curled on her sofa and powered on the television. Jasper leaped to the couch and circled once before plopping on the middle cushion.
Ever since Evan went missing, Jasper had taken to being her shadow, even if it meant lying on the furniture. Breaking her own rules, she let him stay and scratched behind his ears. Kate liked to think he knew she needed the extra support.
She flipped through the channels, settling on a national morning show. For the next five minutes, she watched a millennial wearing a bright, lime-green sweater, show the audience the top ten electronic gifts of the season. One was a smart watch, the same model she’d bought as a present for Luke.
The camera switched to the anchors. “Coming up on our next segment, surprise homecomings of deployed troops and their families.”
Her hand couldn’t grab and turn off the remote quick enough. Usually one of her favorite parts of holiday morning shows, it would be too difficult to watch this year. She’d done so well yesterday, made it the entire day without shedding a tear.
Today she wasn’t so sure she’d managed that. An ache remained in her heart that wouldn’t go away. It was a terrible thing to miss someone and simultaneously fear for them. She went to her room and took her phone from the charger.
Taking a deep breath, she dialed her voicemail. She hadn’t listened to his last message in days, but she needed to hear his voice. A tear dropped at the first word.
“Hey Katie, where are you? Don’t you know you’re supposed to answer even if it’s, umm, I’m so tired, I have no idea what time it is there, but you should have answered regardless.” His hearty laughter filled the next three seconds. “Anyway, I just wanted to say hi and let you know I’m all right. Six weeks to go and I’m getting out of here. Don’t make plans for February. I’m coming home on leave and we’re catching up. Love you, Sis.”
Her hand covered her mouth to push back a sob. He’d been so close to ending his tour. Short breaths came ragged. She couldn’t do this, not today. It was Christmas Eve. Something had to give. She gave up her fight not to cry and let the tears flow. When she was done, she took a shower and left the house. There was somewhere she needed to be.