'It's a ghastly hour, I know r- are you too tired to talk, my pet?'
'No, Mother, I was lying here hoping you'd come.' Gillian moved up and patted the mattress beside her. 'Sit here,'
'Something wonderful has happened and it's just not humanly possible to wait till morning to tell you.' Gillian, of course, guessed what the news might be and sat up starry-eyed. 'Graham still loves me and has at last asked me to marry him.'
'Oh, Mother!' Gillian squealed, hugging her close in excitement. 'I'm so - happy for you both. Congratulations!'
'Yes, it's been a long, long time that we've loved each other, but Graham - bless his heart - was too loyal to your father to marry me, even after the divorce. Now it's different and we're determined to make up for lost time.'
'You're getting married soon?'
'As soon as ever we can.'
'Oh, this is wonderful, wonderful!'
'You're a sweet kid, Gillian, and very, very beautiful. I'm proud to be your mother, but I'm heartbroken that I missed seeing you grow up. You don't hold my desertion against me?'
'I never did, and I don't think Daddy did either. We just accepted the fact. Don't have any conscience about it We were great pals, you know, and spent the most glorious holidays together.' 'I knew he'd taken responsibility for you and rear you well. That made it easier to leave you.'
'Daddy was both father and mother to me.'
'I'm glad. He was a sweet man. I'm full of remorse at the suffering I caused him. I fought hard against my love for Graham - please believe me.'
'I do.'
'Did your father talk to you about me?'
'Not really. I remember his saying that your marriage was a mistake; that he'd given you your freedom; that you'd taken up your career as actress once more, and he hoped you were happy. That's about all. I used to scan the theatre columns in the newspapers in the hope of reading your name.'
'I worked in America, dear, and was too mediocre to be mentioned in the English papers, I'm afraid.'
'You're being modest.'
'Not at all. So you never even missed your poor old mother, you naughty girl!' She gave Gillian's arm a playful little slap.
'Just lately I've needed you badly,' Gillian admitted.
'Oh? Why?'
'I've been confused within myself - couldn't understand myself - wished I had a mother to help me sort myself out; then, as if by magic, you came. So everything's turning out right, you see.'
Ginny looked at her daughter with a slight pucker of concern on her otherwise smooth brow. 'Nothing you want sorted out right now? I'm not much of a psychologist, but. ...'
Gillian laughed reassuringly. 'I'm just fine at the moment, thanks. It's a good thing, though, that I now have you around, just in case.'
'Bank on me. Now I mustn't keep you any longer. We both need our beauty sleep. Shall I tuck you in?'
'Please.' Gillian slid back under the sheet, her hair an aureole of gold spread over the pillows. Her large, lovely eyes misted over with the sudden profound emotion which arose in her as her mother covered her up snugly, and placed a half-shy kiss upon her alabaster forehead.
Next morning, they were lounging on the terrace, enjoying the cool protection of a bright, outsize beach umbrella shielding them against the merciless rays of the hot summer sun. Gillian stretched her arms lazily above her head. 'I've been thinking,' she observed. 'The best plan would be for you and Graham to settle in this house and for me to move over to the cottage. We'll have to draw lots for Madelisa.'
'Certainly not!' her mother remonstrated. 'I wouldn't dream of depriving you of your house - especially after what you've done to make such a beautiful home. As yet, Graham and I have had little time to talk, but he did tell me he's saved enough to buy his own ranch. As luck would have it, there's a suitable ranch going in this very area, though the house, I believe, is hideous. However, we can change that.'
'Now listen to me, Mother!' Gillian's voice was firm. 'This is too ridiculous. Let's be logical. On paper I inherited Impala Ranch, but basically it's yours just as much as mine. In any case, what earthly use is it to me without Graham to help me manage it?'
'Graham won't leave you in the lurch. He thinks he can manage both ranches.'
'It won't work. Stay in the cottage for a start, if you like, but only temporarily.'
'Temporarily?' The older woman lifted a curious eyebrow and searched her daughter's face with sudden interest. 'Why, Gillian, I do believe you're blushing. Have I stumbled upon something?'
Gillian would have preferred to keep her engagement to Dirk secret for a little while longer. The newness of her happiness was to her like the bloom on a peach or dust on, a butterfly's wing. She feared the rough touch of publicity. Now the colour burning her skin had betrayed her. 'I was going to tell you soon and ask, if not your permission, then at least your blessing. I'm hopelessly in love, Mother, and the man wants to marry me.'
'Darling, what news! You've accepted?'
'Yes, I've promised. You're the first one to know.'
Ginny caught her daughter's hand in a warm clasp. 'This is absolutely wonderful! Do I know the happy man?'
'Yes, you knew his parents too.'
'Tell me - tell me quickly. I'm bursting with curiosity.'
'Dirk. Dirk von Breda. Our neighbour.'
'What?' Ginny's eyes became large as saucers. 'You lucky devil! He was by far the most personable male here last light. All the women fell for him - in particular that gorgeous creature, Eve. I thought I smelt a romance there. Well, all I can say is: "Hats off to you!"'
A helicopter flying low over the ranch distracted their attention for a moment.
'That's the flying doctor,' Gillian proffered. 'He visits the isolated and inaccessible mountain clinics by plane.' Then she returned to their conversation. 'Dirk has a reputation with women, I know, but I trust him.'
'How sensible can you be! His breed of devastatingly attractive men, who've sown their wild oats, often settle down and make excellent husbands. It's up to you, my girl! Was it this love affair to which you referred last night? I mean, about being confused and now knowing how to sort yourself out?'
'Yes. I seemed to hate him at the same time as longing for him. I didn't know what to make of it.'
'But you're sure now?'
'Absolutely. I'm doubly sure because my mother didn't say: "He's too old for you," or, "He'll never be true to you." You're a good psychologist and a fabulous mother. See how I need you? So,' she went on, 'I'm planning to sell Impala Ranch to Graham.'
'Yes, I can see there'll have to be changes.'
'This affects Graham,' said Gillian. 'He'll have to be told soon, but for the moment, as you see, I have no ring, and we've made no plans. An announcement is a bit premature.'
'I understand.'
Madelisa appeared with a tea tray laden with goodies just as Graham crossed the lawn towards them. He greeted Gillian with a little embarrassed smile. She gave him a smacking kiss of congratulation and he give her his usual brotherly hug.
'Pass the tea, please, Mother, I have a phone call to make,' Gillian said, and ran inside to telephone Dirk. She wanted him to approve the sale of the Impala Ranch to Graham. She heard Gezephi's voice at the other end of the line.
'The Nkosan has just left with the doctor and Miss Eve, Nkosazana,' she answered Gillian's query.
'Miss Eve?'
'Yes, Nkosazana. The doctor is taking them to Johannesburg in his plane.'
'I see. Thanks, Gezephi.'
'Thanks, Nkosazana. The Nkosan said they'd be back tonight.'
Gillian was puzzled. What could take Dirk to Johannesburg on Christmas Day when all business firms and shops would be shut? And why go with Eve? Well, that was his concern, and if she was going to marry him, she'd better start trusting him now.
That evening, at Graham's invitation, Gillian and her mother, spruced up festively and glowing after Madelisa's beauty treatment, walked across to the cottage for drinks. All day the heat had been unbe
arable and the women had rested and slept in their cool darkened bedrooms. It was. arranged that Madelisa, whom they wished to save extra cooking, would take across a cold Christmas meal selected from the delicious foods left over from the previous night's party.
The cottage lounge was bright with exotic flowers from the garden. They settled down comfortably, while Graham busied himself with the drinks. Gillian sat facing her mother and the door. She could hardly believe that the woman before her was the same slightly jaded person of their first encounter. Ginny looked exquisite in a French creation of black georgette, offsetting her marble complexion and platinum cap of shining hair. She looked rested and happy.
A strange awareness of Dirk's presence sent Gillian's heart thumping. Her eyes were drawn as if by a magnet to the door. He had entered silently, unnoticed, and stood framed in the doorway, arrestingly handsome in a dark lounge suit that fitted his well-held shoulders and slim hips to perfection. His appraising gaze was upon the simple but expensive white gown which moulded the curves of her maturing young body.
'Why, there you are!' Graham welcomed him.
A little smile of amusement quirked round Gillian's lips, as she watched her mother surreptitiously making, as it were, an official valuation of her future son-in- law.
Graham, attractive in an immaculate grey suit, popped the cork of a champagne bottle and handed round the golden, sparkling liquid. Gillian clinked glasses with her mother.
'Hold it!' Graham commanded. 'Ladies and gentlemen !' he announced. 'I wish to propose a toast to the health and happiness of my bride-to-be.' He held his glass on high. 'To Ginny!'
There was much laughter and drinking, feasting and merrymaking that night, but Dirk did not say a word about his own betrothal nor about his secret mission to Johannesburg with Eve. More than once, Gillian caught her mother's gaze fixed upon her with curious concern; then she would smile back reassuringly and the party would go on. Deep down in her heart, Gillian felt a gnawing uneasiness and, try as she would to master it, the ugly snake of jealousy raised its head. Gillian faced up to the fact. 'It's true, I am jealous,' she thought. 'I'm jealous of Eve and of all the other women, past and future.' Mother Superior had decreed that jealousy was the most heinous sin of all and preached that only prayer and penance could rout it.
'But I'm no nun. I'm promised in marriage to a desirable male - a charmer of women.'
She realized that her married life would be ruined if she allowed the jealousy to flourish in her heart. She must weed it out. But how? She thought of her father, and his belief that evils arising from the subconscious could be conquered by facing up to them and admitting them. They used to play a game about it and she would play it now.
She conjured up a picture of Eve and confessed: .'I'm jealous of you.'
Dirk's magnetic eyes drew her from her reveries. She caught his sardonic smile. Why was he mocking her? Was it because once again she had been a little fool - a trusting little fool - ever ready to fall into a trap? Or was he amused because he was aware of the war waging within her? She refused to believe that it was her preordained lot in the future, to be eaten up by doubt, suspicion, jealousy and hate. She would not stand for that. Either she would kill jealousy tonight, or she would refuse to marry Dirk.
'Confront!' Daddy had said.
Her three companions became engrossed in a lively political argument and she slipped out quietly into the delicious cool of the garden.
She stood enveloped in the scent of flowers and played again the little mental game her father had taught her: she conjured up Eve's image and confessed to it her jealousy. Later, she became bored with the process and then, miraculously, she felt free - free of Eve, free of any hateful feeling towards her - released, and a great peace and serenity settled upon her. She sent up a little prayer of thanksgiving.
'Star-gazing?' a man's deep voice said behind her, and she turned and flung her arms impetuously around Dirk's neck. 'Oh, Dirk, it's such a lovely night and I'm so happy !'
He kissed her gently, then held her from him, scrutinizing her face in the dim light.
'I believe Gezephi told you I've been to Johannesburg with Eve?'
'Yes; does it matter?'
'You're not jealous?'
'I was,' she admitted with wide-eyed candour, 'but I've learnt to conquer the feeling. I'll never be jealous again.'
'Well now,' he exclaimed as a smile lit up his dark, lean features, 'if this doesn't deserve a prize!' He reached into his jacket pocket and snapped open a small leather jewel case, displaying a sparkling diamond ring. Gillian stared dumbfounded. Dirk lifted it out of its red plush nest and slipped it on to her ring finger, and she gazed at it speechless. 'It's beautiful!' she whispered at last.
Dirk drew her to him, and with his lips against her hair, he too whispered, 'This comes with all the love I can possibly give you.' Again he held her from him to smile into her eyes. 'This is what took me to Johannesburg. As for Eve, she has a business contact in the diamond world, who was willing to open shop for me on condition that Eve came along to introduce us.'
'It was sweet of her,' Gillian said warmly.
They returned to the lounge. Dirk swept a courteous bow before Gillian's mother. 'Madam, may I request the honour of your daughter's hand in marriage?'
Gillian proudly flashed her ring and the celebration started all over again. Old Madelisa was fetched from the kitchen to drink a toast to the two couples. With eyes streaming with tears, she made a little speech. 'Missy Ginny, Nkosazana, Nkosan Dirk, Nkosan Grem, I'm so happy.' The double chins wobbled piteously. 'I pray to good God to bless you and send you children like the leaves on the tree.'
Graham and Ginny McBride were married quietly at the Mbabane Magistrates' Court; only Gillian, Dirk, Eve and her Baron, and old Madelisa were in attendance. Afterwards they lunched merrily and in great style at the Holiday Inn, while Madelisa went off to visit relations.
Dirk promised to keep an eye on Gillian and the ranch and the couple flew to Johannesburg en route to Paris for a fortnight's honeymoon.
Eve, with whom Gillian was developing a warm friendship, had given Ginny letters of introduction to some of the famous Paris boutiques, where she could choose her daughter's wedding robe and trousseau.
Gillian, like her mother, would have preferred a quiet wedding, but Dirk was adamant. 'Let's have ours before the altar with all the trappings, all the traditional, but this time genuine, symbolic pomp and ceremony,' he declared.
At last the newly weds returned and settled temporarily in the cottage. With Dirk's approval, Gillian sold the ranch to Graham, at a nominal price, and shared the proceeds with her mother.
She was immediately flung into a vortex of activity and exciting preparations for a wedding that would long be remembered in Swaziland. Dirk came over one afternoon with the express purpose of discussing the locale for their honeymoon. They strolled down to the river and stood, arms entwined, beside the flowing water. 'You're my golden girl in those yellow slacks and lacy sweater, and I adore you,' Dirk murmured caressing her with his eyes. 'But let's get down to business. I've just been informed that there are seats available on the plane to Europe. I thought we might spend the first night at the Hotel President in Johannesburg, and fly to Switzerland the next day. As you're fond of skiing, would you like that, my little one?'
'Anything you say.'
He raised an enquiring eyebrow at the unexpected listlessness of her answer. 'Why, Gillian, what's the matter? You sound lacking in enthusiasm. You're not turning chicken, are you? You still want to marry me?'
She stood on tiptoe and put her arms round his neck. 'Oh no, Dirk darling!' she cried. 'It's not like that at all! It's just....'
'Well?'
'This smart wedding is as much as I can take,' she! confessed. 'To please you, I'm throwing myself into it, heart and soul. I'll play my part in it so you'll be proud of me - you'll see! I can even say with honesty that I'm thoroughly excited and enjoying all the fuss. It'll be lovely to be able
to look back on a magnificent wedding and have the photos and everything.'
'Well then?'
'Once it's over, I don't want a smart-honeymoon as well. I don't want crowds and sights and artificial entertainment. Skiing's fine, but even there in the mountain inns there are too many people, and we'll have the hustle and bustle of Johannesburg the first night.' Dirk's piercing eyes were flicking left and right as he watched her face intently. 'Oh, Dirk, my darling, can't we just hide away quietly somewhere, and just be together?'
' "Far from the madding crowd"?'
Her eyes gave him the answer.
'You really feel that way, Gillian?'
'I really do.'
'Well now, isn't that strange,' he marvelled. 'That's just the way I feel.'
She smiled at him, and turned away to seat herself on an old tree stump in the sun-laced shade of an acacia tree. 'Where shall we go?' She clasped her hands together expectantly.
He came to sit beside her and lit a pipe. 'I know just the place,' he said between puffs of smoke.
'Here in Swaziland?'
'Yes, here in Swaziland.'
'Tell me.'
'Shall I keep it a surprise? A secret?'
'Yes, do! Do!'
'I used to dream of bringing my bride there some day. Do you like the "simple life"?'
'I adore it!' Her eyes were luminous with anticipation.
'No luxuries, mind you.'
'No luxuries. Agreed!'
'Except the luxury of my arms,' he teased. Her black-fringed eyelids swept the curve of her soft cheek with sudden shyness.
'No formal wear,' he stipulated.
'May we take Ntombi?'
He laughed. 'Not this time, my love; I'm not sharing you.'
CHAPTER TEN
'Most brides are beautiful,' Dirk said with his eyes on the road as the powerful Aston-Martin swept the newly-wedded couple through the aloe-spangled Mopani bush, 'but mine was the most beautiful, the most radiant in the whole world!'
Gillian's lashes swept her soft blushing cheeks shyly as she thought of Dirk's gift of rare imported orchids for her bridal bouquet, and the subtle message they conveyed.
Red Feather Love Page 16