Cipher (The Cipher Series)

by Cindi Madsen

  Summer righted herself, tugging her shirt down. “It’s not going to happen, so you might as well stop with the babies.”

  This tired scenario kept happening. Cody wanted to take things further, but she wasn’t ready. He got more upset each time. When she wasn’t so preoccupied and his kisses and touch made her deliciously dizzy, it wasn’t always easy for her to put the brakes on their make out sessions either. Then she’d wonder what was wrong with her, worry he was going to dump her, and feel guilty she was so confused over taking the next step. But right now, she didn’t feel any of those things. He’d totally ignored her question and what she wanted, so this time, he wasn’t going to be the only mad one.

  Sure enough, the muscles along his jaw tightened and his chest was heaving with shallow breaths. “Kendall and Jack have already done it, and we’ve been dating for longer than they have.”

  Summer crossed her arms. “Oh, now I am in the mood. If they’re ready, I’m ready.”

  “That’s not what I mean.” He plowed his fingers through his hair, then brought his arms down, his shoulders slumping as he exhaled. “I’m just saying, I’ve been patient…” He reached out and took her hand. “And I love you.”

  The anger heating her veins cooled and guilt rose up to take its place. Cody had no idea why she was so upset, because she hadn’t told him. It wasn’t his fault. And he loved her—he told her all the time. So when he leaned in to kiss her, a questioning look in his eye, she let him. This time, she kept her eyes open, letting his face fill her vision. Intoxicating heat spread through her veins as he slid his tongue in to meet hers—damn, the boy knew how to kiss. She focused on the pleasant chills traveling through her body, inhaling his scent as the edges of the world went fuzzy.

  Then his hands started roving again, moving to unbutton her pants. The world snapped back into relief. Summer grabbed his hand and held it firm. “I think you better take me home now.”

  The lights from the ignored movie lit up Cody’s face, emphasizing the frustration on his features. “I can’t keep doing this, Summer. If you’re not ready, maybe I should find someone who is.”

  His words cut into her, sending a sharp pain through her chest. Then fear mixed in with the hurt, the combination stealing her breath. I do care about him, and I don’t want to lose him.

  Looking into his eyes, though, she didn’t see love or concern. This isn’t how it’s supposed to be. I want my first time to be because I love somebody and I want to do it, not because I’m scared of being dumped.

  Her throat tightened. “I guess you’ll have to find someone else then.”

  Cody pushed himself to his feet and stormed out the front door. The slam echoed through the room. Summer thought he’d only gone to cool off, but then she heard the engine fire up. It revved, and then got quieter and quieter, until she couldn’t hear it at all.

  He just left me here. Apparently, he’s going to find someone this very minute.

  Kendall and Jack were doing who knew what in his bedroom—well, she had a pretty good idea—and calling Dad would bring up more questions than she wanted to answer. He’d kill Cody if he found out about this.

  After running through all of her options, Summer took her phone out of her purse. She scrolled down her contacts until she reached the name she was looking for. Her finger hovered over the button for a moment before she made the call. She held her breath as it rang, not even sure what she’d say, but knowing he’d come get her if she asked.

  When it went to voicemail, she disconnected without leaving a message. Loneliness settled over her, pressing against her like a weight. I have no one, I’m seeing some kind of heavenly messenger, and Cody and I just broke up.

  Tears filled her eyes. At first she wiped them away. Then she went ahead and let them flow.

  Chapter Three

  The knock on the bedroom door startled Summer out of her daze. She’d spent most of her Saturday moping around in her room, torturing herself with happy memories of her and Cody. She closed the window on her laptop that showed the picture of her and Cody cuddling at the beach, wiped her fingers under her eyes in case there were any leftover tears, and sat up on her bed. “Yeah?”

  Dad cracked the door open. “Cody’s here.”

  Did I hear him right, or have I been staring at pictures of us for too long? “Cody’s… here?”

  “That’s what I said.”

  “Why?”

  “Do you want me to ask him?” Dad said. “I’d be more than happy to interrogate him.”

  Summer swung her feet to the ground. “No. Tell him I’ll be right there.”

  Dad nodded and closed the door behind him. She hadn’t told him about the break up yet. It had been awful enough to rehash it with Kendall and Jack last night when they’d driven her home. Kendall kept saying it would all blow over, which had pissed Summer off. Cody had pushed her, then abandoned her. How did that blow over? Of course, she didn’t say that; she simply sat nodding, waiting for the moment she could be alone in her bed to do the ugly cry.

  All day she’d tried to convince herself that the breakup was for the best. Only then she’d think of a good memory, and suddenly she was listening to songs that reminded her of him and pulling up all their pictures. She told herself over and over that while he used to be sweet—while he still had sweet moments—he’d done something unforgivable.

  Summer pulled her smashed-from-lying-on-them-all-day curls into a ponytail, swiped on mascara, and added lip gloss for good measure. No reason not to look my best when I tell Cody to go to hell.

  As she descended the stairs, Tiffany’s laugh, along with the blare of the TV, came from the living room. Cody stood in the entryway, shuffling his feet, eyes fixed on the floor. Summer slowly approached him, hating the way her heart tugged—the sight of him looking all sad and deflated made it hard to stay mad, and she needed to be strong. “What are you doing here?”

  Cody scratched the back of his head. “I, uh, came to take you to the beach party.”

  Summer glanced over her shoulder to make sure Dad’s attention was still on the movie, since he tended to play Spy Dad whenever her boyfr—ex boyfriend—was around. “You think I’m going to the party with the jerk who left me last night?”

  “Summer, I’m so sorry about last night. I should’ve never left like that, and I swear it’ll never happen again.” He brought out his sad puppy-dog look and threw a hand over his heart. “It’s just that I care about you so much, and I get upset when you don’t feel the same way.”

  Summer glared at him. “That’s the only way you know of to show you care?”

  “You know that’s not what I mean.” Cody reached out and took her hand. “But still, it’s no excuse. I was a jerk. A total asshole. I’m so sorry, and it won’t happen again.” Her first instinct was to pull away. But then his thumb brushed the back of her knuckles—it was always hard to think when he did that. He looked sincere, too, not like when he was only half paying attention, talking to her while playing his videogames. And she knew she wasn’t always the easiest person to get along with. There were dark days when she’d been mean to him for no reason.

  “Please forgive me, baby,” he whispered. “I’ll give you all the time you need. No more pressure, I promise.” He used his grip on her hand to pull her into a hug. All the good memories of their relationship, the ones she’d been reliving all day came back to her. Surely they outweighed last night’s fight? And being in his strong arms again, the smell of his familiar woodsy cologne with just a hint of spice, calmed her. Made her feel wanted. Needed. Loved.

  She put her hand on the side of his face and his blue eyes practically glowed in the dim light. “Okay,” she said. “Let me just change my clothes and we’ll go.” She raised her voice and called out, “Dad, we’re going to the beach.”

  The noise coming from the television muted, and she knew Dad had paused whatever he and Tiffany were watching. “Is your phone charged?”

  “Uh-huh.”

  “Don’t f
orget your mace.”

  “Yeah, those seagulls are aggressive.”

  “Funny, Summer. Hey, Cody…?”

  Cody stood straighter at the mention of his name. “Yes?”

  “You take care of my little girl,” Dad said. “She better not look like she’s been crying when she comes home tonight, like she did last night. We have a two-strike rule in my house.”

  Cody’s eyes widened and he mouthed, “Did you tell your dad?”

  Summer shook her head and kept her voice low. “I didn’t say anything.” Dad had asked if she was okay when she checked in last night. She’d told him that she was just tired, then headed straight to bed. She thought she’d done a good job of acting like everything was okay. Somehow, he’d seen through it.

  “I need to hear that you understand,” Dad’s voice boomed into the room.

  “I understand, sir,” Cody said.

  Summer hurried upstairs to change, leaving Cody there to stew. Nothing wrong with making him squirm for a few minutes after what he’d put her through.

  ***

  Even though Cody promised he wouldn’t leave her stranded again, Summer insisted on driving. Dad had gone over all the safety features when he’d first given her the Civic. He’d gone on and on about the high crash ratings and said something about a body shell designed to withstand an impact. Summer was just glad to have a car, only caring that it got her where she wanted to go, looked nice, and had a good stereo.

  As they headed to the beach, Cody talked about football practice and the game this next weekend, like nothing had changed. He kept leaning over and placing kisses on her cheek, too, telling her that she was pretty. Even though she’d told him that she forgave him—and she did—it was like a dark cloud was hanging over their relationship now. Even though she wanted to get over yesterday’s fight, she wasn’t sure she could just forget about it this time.

  You know better than anyone that people make mistakes. She hoped that forgiving other people for their mistakes would help scrub away her past—she needed to know that a person could be forgiven, no matter what they’d done. She closed that door in her mind, like she worked so hard to do whenever she thought about it. Focus on the here and now. Beach. Boyfriend. Friends.

  After finding a parking space, she and Cody walked toward the spot on the beach their group usually set up camp in. A football came hurtling through the air toward them. Cody released her hand and caught it with practiced ease, then tossed a beautiful spiral back to the guys.

  Kendall ran up to Summer and enveloped her in a hug. “You came! I’m so glad! The guys are throwing the ball around…” Kendall made a shooing motion at Cody and tugged Summer the other direction. “The girls are over here.”

  “I’ll come find you in a little while,” Cody said, walking backwards with his eyes on her, before turning to join the guys.

  Kendall grinned at Summer. “I knew you two would make up.”

  Summer wanted to say it wasn’t that simple, but arguing wouldn’t do any good, and she supposed she and Cody had made up. It was easier to just let it go, so that’s what she did. With the salt water-scented breeze floating over her, nothing mattered as much anyway. She closed her eyes and inhaled a deep breath, holding it for a few seconds before letting it out. The beach had been a big selling point when Dad had sat her down at the beginning of last year and told her he was thinking of taking a job in San Diego. It didn’t take much to convince her to leave Chicago. A fresh start in a new place was something they both needed. And what better place to start over than sunny California, where the beach was practically her new backyard?

  Summer said hi to the girls, drifting in and out of the many conversations they had going on. When everyone else was involved in talking about their upcoming dance routine, Summer broke away. She moved closer to the shore and sat in the sand, just a couple of feet back from where it was damp from the reaching fingers of the ocean. This was exactly what she needed. A couple of moments to relax in one of her favorite places.

  “Hey, Sunshine.”

  A smile spread across her face. Only one person called her that, and he’d been doing so since the day they’d met. “Mister Bond.”

  She’d felt it only fair she give Troy Bond a nickname, too, so she’d decided on Mister Bond. Maybe not the most original, but it stuck. He sat next to her, and she turned toward him. “So, what are you doing here?”

  “You know me,” he said with a casual shrug. “I love a good party.”

  “But you think you’re above all the people at this party.”

  Troy grinned, mischief dancing in his eyes. “I am. So are you, though, and you’re here. I suppose you came with that boyfriend of yours. How is Studmuffin anyway?” Troy refused to call Cody by his name, too, but the way he said the nickname was far from a compliment.

  The real answer to his question was complicated, and one she didn’t plan on telling anyone, so she decided to go with a joke that was based in the truth. “I think he’s more muffin than stud today.”

  Troy laughed, lifting her spirits with the sound. He actually got her jokes, which apparently wasn’t an automatic thing—who knew? Lately, they’d been hanging in different circles, though. At least they shared chemistry this semester, giving them a few minutes of interaction at school.

  Summer remembered that Troy had a date last night, and she was glad he hadn’t answered her call during it—things would’ve gotten messy. “What about you and Lexi?”

  Troy grabbed a handful of sand, then let it slowly drift through his fingers. “She’s pretty.”

  “And?”

  “That’s it. She’s pretty, but nothing else.”

  “Yeah, the girl’s about as deep as the lyrics to a Kesha song.”

  He laughed again, the corners of his eyes crinkling with his smile. “Sounds about right.”

  Troy used to have shoulder-length hair that he constantly bleached. Since it was naturally dark, the process turned it orange instead of blond. But over the summer he’d sheared off most of it, returning it to its natural, almost-black color. He’d also filled out, going from tall and scrawny to tall with lean muscles tanned by all his hours in the sun. All the girls at school had noticed the transformation. The new look did suit him—of course, Summer had always thought he was cute.

  “I didn’t really think you two would hit it off,” Summer said, leaning back on her hands and digging her fingers into the still-warm sand. “But she begged me to set you up with her.”

  Troy twisted the leather bracelets on his wrist, the thumb ring he always wore glinting as it caught the last rays of the day. “Lexi and I were actually on our date when you called. I didn’t even see you’d called until really late last night. I figured if it’d been important, you would’ve left a message.” His eyes met hers as though he was asking a question more than making a statement.

  Telling Troy that Cody left her stranded would only make him mad, and there was no point now that things had been mostly resolved. Working to sound casual, she swiped a hand through the air. “It was nothing. Just checking on your date, that kind of thing.”

  “Summer?”

  She glanced back at where the voice had come from. Cody came up behind her, face all twisted up in annoyance. “Hey. What are you doing all the way over here?”

  “Just watching the waves with Mister Bond,” she said.

  Cody extended his hand. “Let’s go hang out over by the rest of the guys.” Summer grabbed his hand and let him pull her to her feet. He wrapped his arm around her waist, looked at Troy, and gave him a tight nod. “Troy.”

  Summer had asked Cody to be nice to her friend, but the way he regarded Troy barely bordered on civil. Of course, the look Troy was giving Cody, eyes narrowed, lips pressed tightly together, wasn’t much better.

  Troy stood and brushed the sand off of his pants. “I’ll see you around, Sunshine.” His gaze lingered on her for a moment, then he turned and headed in the other direction.

  ***

 
Lexi and Kendall were talking handbags, something Summer couldn’t care less about. She glanced around, searching for Cody, when a group huddled together a few yards back caught her eye.

  I should go over there. The thought had come out of nowhere. She lowered her eyebrows. What am I going to do? Stroll right up and introduce myself? It wasn’t like her at all, yet that was exactly what she felt like she should do. She continued to stare, a strange tug in her chest, wondering why she suddenly had the overwhelming impulse to meet them. Troy approached the tight circle of bodies and called out something she couldn’t make out—probably a hi, accompanied by whatever nicknames he’d given them.

  “What do you think, Summer?” Kendall asked, putting her hand on Summer’s shoulder. “White or tan?”

  Summer tore her attention from the group and looked at Kendall. She wasn’t sure if Kendall was still talking handbags or if they’d moved on to something else. “Tan,” Summer said, hoping she hadn’t just disagreed with Kendall.

  “Are you sure? The white one is really in this season.” Kendall shoved her phone under Summer’s nose, and she caught sight of two Coach handbags on the screen.

  “I think both are good, so whatever you think.”

  Kendall gave a pleased nod, then turned back to the other girls, saying she was “Totally going to order it.”

  As if her eyes couldn’t help themselves, they were drawn back to the group she’d been watching. Another tug in her chest. Frantic energy buzzed through her limbs, as if they were telling her to go over already. “Who’re they?” she asked Lexi, tilting her head to indicate who she was asking about.

  Lexi glanced over her shoulder and wrinkled up her forehead. “Them? They’re the Reject Group.”

  Summer thought of Troy’s assessment of Lexi—pretty and nothing else. The girl could do a splits jump like nobody’s business, but apparently nice had slipped the list. Summer liked to think of herself as nice. While she hadn’t gone out of her way to be mean to anyone, she supposed that lately, she hadn’t been all that nice either. “Do you know names? Anything else about them?”