by DiAnn Mills
At the end of the story, I laughed too. And it felt good.
“I also became a true Christian,” I said.
Tahoma smiled and took my hand. Charlotte didn’t say a word, and I remembered she’d stated her beliefs about God were private. Something else for me to think about and discuss with a person who was an experienced believer. I suppose that Christian friend would be Tahoma, although I know he struggled with telling his parents about his faith.
Being a follower of Jesus Christ would be harder than I anticipated, but I’d made my commitment, and I believed God would help me find the answers.
Tahoma’s head pounded like war drums. He’d been beaten, bruised, and shot. A man with any sense would walk away from the circumstances that were winning the battle of whether he should live in the high desert or continue his life in another part of the country. Living here had rising odds that he wouldn’t survive.
But the young woman standing so close to him, whose shirtsleeve brushed against him, fogged his senses. Her bravery today and her step of faith urged him to be a better man. While waiting for the shooters to finish them off, he’d almost told her he loved her.
Imagine a wealthy young woman with sun-kissed hair that flowed to her shoulders and eyes that rivaled the sky finding happiness with a Navajo who didn’t have anything to offer but his heart. To make matters worse, he didn’t have the guts to tell his family about his spiritual life.
But while he lay facedown on the cold, hard ground today, he’d vowed to tell his parents about his faith. What could they do? Disown him? Demand he leave their community? Seek spiritual balance and embrace their religion with his faith? Things could be worse.
He could have died and faced God today with a pitiful explanation as to why he hadn’t lived his commitment. Without a single doubt to muddle his mind, he believed God had put Eva in his life to make a good man out of him. But she could never learn about his love for her.
“I’ll drive you home.” Charlotte taped the bandages in place.
“I appreciate it. Not much in the mood to walk or borrow a horse.” He needed one of the pain relievers in his locked medicine cabinet.
“May I come along?” Eva’s soft voice sounded like sweet music. “I’d like to go by and see your parents and tell them what you did for me today.”
“Only if you include Rex, Juan, and the others as part of the rescuers. They saved our necks while I had my face in the dirt.”
“You two are pathetic.” Charlotte gathered up the blood-soaked rags. “Disgustingly pathetic.”
“I don’t understand.” Eva placed the bandages and tape into a small box. She recapped the alcohol and placed it inside.
Charlotte anchored her hand on her hip. “I guess if I have to tell you, then you might as well remain oblivious to what the rest of us can see.”
Tahoma’s heart hammered against his chest. He knew exactly what Charlotte meant, felt it every time he saw Eva. He’d already heard the teasing from Rex and the others many times. How did he respond to Charlotte except to play ignorant?
Eva shook her head. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She swung her attention to Tahoma. “Do you?”
“Of course he does.” Charlotte lifted a kettle of hot water from the fireplace and poured it into the basin. She picked up a bar of soap and scrubbed her hands. “Maybe you two can figure it out by the time I’m ready to leave.”
When Eva looked to him for answers, he nearly caved in. The sooner her grandfather’s murderer was found, the better for them all.
“Oh, for goodness’ sake.” Charlotte dried her hands and then opened a cupboard door to slip the box of medicinal supplies inside. “You two wouldn’t know what bit you if it was a snake.”
Eva stiffened. “I still don’t understand.”
“Love. You and Tahoma are so deep into that well that it would take a dozen men to pull you out.”
“Charlotte!” Eva’s face reddened.
His face grew hot. “I think you’ve made a mistake here. We’re—”
“Friends.” Eva wrung her hands. “In fact, with what I’ve learned about my father and Mr. Benally, Tahoma and I are like…brother and sister.”
Charlotte crossed her arms over her chest. “Brother and sister, you are not. Two people who are blind to love—you definitely are. The sooner you two admit it, the sooner we can plan a wedding.” She shrugged. “Of course, then we won’t have anything to talk about.”
Tahoma kept his stoic stance and chose not to say another word. The more he denied his attraction to Eva, the more Charlotte would dig deeper for the truth. For certain, Eva needed to exit his life soon before he uttered the condition of his heart and made a fool out of himself.
CHAPTER 31
I couldn’t think of a single thing to say on the way to take Tahoma home. My tongue hit paralysis while my mind spun with everything. At times I wondered how I slept at night. Usually badly, with all the thoughts banging against my brain. And now I’d learned that the ranch hands and Charlotte were linking Tahoma and me romantically—but I’d suspected it.
Had someone read my mind?
“I’m sorry I embarrassed you two,” Charlotte finally said. “I was insensitive with all the tragedy that’s hit.”
“It’s all right,” I said. “A little humor is good medicine.”
“But what I said is true. I can’t take back the words.”
Charlotte wasn’t helping at all.
“Maybe not talking about the gossip would be a better apology.” Tahoma had stretched out on the backseat, and he needed to rest, not address rumors.
“I can keep my mouth shut for now,” Charlotte said. “Am I forgiven?”
“I’ll consider it,” Tahoma said.
“Of course.” My cheeks still burned.
“This has been a tough day for all of us,” Charlotte said. “The tragedies here need to end.”
“I hope the sheriff can get a confession out of Walt Chambers for killing Pete. At least Eva and I can witness to his trying to use us for target practice. An exchange for who is behind this would help us sleep a little easier.” His voice sounded weak, but the conversation had definitely taken a better turn.
“He’ll probably refuse to talk without a lawyer,” I said. “Since the original crime was set in Syracuse, someone with money has to be funding him.”
“Smart thinking,” Tahoma said. “But there are ways to make a man talk.”
“Do you mean forcing him to give the sheriff information?”
“Honey,” Charlotte said, “you aren’t in New York. Here we get the job done and answer to fancy lawyers later.”
I startled and had to reflect on what she’d said. Walt had tried to kill us and may have been the one who’d killed Pete and Grandfather. He was guilty, but the law said a man was innocent until proven guilty. He shouldn’t be abused in order to secure a confession. An image of what I must have looked like when I started after him crossed my mind, but I shoved it away to look at the matter…well, righteously.
I turned to the backseat where only a shadow of Tahoma appeared. “How can you condone that kind of interrogation when a Christian is to be forgiving?” Had it only been a couple of hours since I’d made this decision?
“I can forgive, Eva. But my faith doesn’t mean Chambers escapes judgment and punishment for his crimes. God is just.”
“But we’re to obey the laws of our land, which means a fair trial. He’s a snake for all he’s done, but it’s not up to us to judge him.”
“I believe in a fair trial, but he’s guilty and the authorities need his information.” Tahoma’s soft words were full of determination. “Do you want someone else killed?”
“No. The thought sickens me.”
“Then let those who know how to get a confession do so.”
I started to argue, but I remembered his wound and what he’d done for me today. I’d be surly too. Probably worse. He was wrong about not obeying the law, and I agonized over it. I
despised what Walt had done, and if I were perfectly honest, I’d say I despised him and all he stood for. But in my opinion, forcing information from him did not coincide with the law.
The Bible had much to say about bitterness and revenge. The reverend in Syracuse had spoken many times about the price of those things. For certain I needed to learn more about what forgiveness meant. For that matter, I needed to learn more about life.
I also wanted to understand Tahoma. My hero was not perfect, and my heart ached with the crushing blow. Twice I’d learned of traits that startled me. But those imperfections hadn’t reined in my love. They merely saddened me.
The wound on Tahoma’s neck felt like someone had lit a match to his flesh. Doctors were poor patients. He wanted to moan, but the sound would only alarm Eva and Charlotte.
“I want you to consider how the law is to be upheld,” Eva said.
One more reason why they could never be together. “Have you ever faced prejudice or gone hungry? Have you ever been spit on and blamed for every crime in the area?” Fury roared through him. “Pete’s dead. You were nearly killed. And you’re concerned about Chambers’s legal rights?”
“I’m concerned about the law.”
What had he been thinking when he let his heart run away with his logic? Murdock needed to move her soon.
The first thing he planned to do when he reached home was to swallow a couple of the pills that promised to deaden pain. Then he wanted to sleep for twelve hours.
Bad idea. He couldn’t sleep for more than seven. He had to guard Eva in the morning.
CHAPTER 32
By Sunday afternoon I was miserable. I hadn’t seen Tahoma, even though I knew he watched me from a distance. Our parting words on Thursday had left me empty. He’d said good-bye, and I told him I hoped he felt better. The car door slammed, and I remembered I hadn’t thanked him. I stepped out to express my gratitude, and he swung around.
“Thank you for risking your life for me today,” I said. “That sounds small when I owe you so much.”
“It’s my duty.” His words were flat, and I wished I could see his face in the shadows of night.
“I’m sorry we had a disagreement. It was thoughtless of me when you were hurt.”
He said nothing for several seconds while I waited. “We come from two different worlds, Eva. When you’ve seen discrimination, hate, and the government’s unfair treatment of a people who were here long before the whites, then respect for laws comes with a price. I’ll let Charlotte know if I hear from Murdock about when you’re to be transported to another location.”
I swallowed a sob and bid him goodnight. Charlotte and I chose not to call on the elderly Benallys. The hour had grown late, and my emotions were shattered.
Now more than ever, I wanted to understand Tahoma because he was my friend—a man who’d seen the harshness of life. Yet he’d survived to obtain an education and knew God. This complex man had grasped a part of my heart. Now I wondered if he ever regretted befriending me.
No longer able to stay in my cabin, I grabbed my coat and pulled out my blood stained gloves to venture into the afternoon. Tahoma had my heart, and I sensed it breaking. Charlotte would help me to understand him, and I hoped I would find her free to talk.
I stepped into the horse barn and was met with the smell of horses and hay. My dear friend sat on a bale, and she’d been crying. We both missed Pete. Charlotte had grown close to him in a short amount of time. Compassion for her caused my tears to flow. My sobs garnered her attention, and she turned toward me.
“Charlotte, would you like for me to leave you alone?” I held out my hand, wanting to give her strength.
She took my hand, and I realized we desperately needed each other. “No, dear. I’m glad you came. The men are grieving in their own way for Pete. But a man seldom comprehends a woman’s emotions. They want to fix things—tie a rope around the trouble and haul it over a cliff. And if the woman is a loved one, then the man will do everything within his power to protect her.”
Was she referring to herself, the ranch hands, or Tahoma?
“Shall we take a walk, or would you like to come to my cabin?” Perhaps my own sorrow about life’s tumultuous road was not as important as I thought.
Charlotte smiled through reddened eyes. “A walk would be nice.”
We turned to face the open barn door where the afternoon sun offered a lighted path for us. I thought of God’s love and felt a sense of comfort. How very refreshing to have all the years spent in church suddenly have meaning. I knew God had a plan for my life, and I hoped that plan included Tahoma. In the meantime, maybe I should learn how to lasso calves—or ride bareback or…do something that would prove my worth at Ghost Ranch.
We walked toward the door and out into the sunshine. However, it was bitter cold, and I shivered.
“I’m terribly sorry for the unfortunate circumstances that have troubled your home,” I said.
“Thank you. Ghost Ranch has had its years of tragedy and lawbreaking. It didn’t receive its name by chance. I’ve heard the tales of hangings and murders, and while I’ve been here, good men have died of natural causes and some not so natural. But the tragedies haven’t touched me deeply until now.”
“Since Grandfather’s death, I seem to look at every man with suspicion. Then when I come to trust someone, something happens. Usually devastating.”
“Like Walt Chambers and Pete Davidson?”
I nodded. “I trusted Walt and distrusted Pete.”
“Learning to judge character takes years of practice.”
“I thought I managed to do it quite well until recently.”
We walked along in silence. I was deep into my misgivings, and I had no idea what topics settled into Charlotte’s mind.
“I failed to address your new faith,” she finally said. “Religion is such a private matter for me, not one I enjoy discussing. Perhaps in time.”
“Thank you. I grew up attending church and thought I was a Christian until Tahoma asked me specific questions.”
“Let me make a suggestion. You had an experience when you feared death. With all that is going on in your life, why don’t you postpone your new faith until you can think more clearly?”
Surely I’d heard wrong. I refused to insult her, but my faith was real. And I could not abandon it until my life was comfortable. Ghost Ranch didn’t have a church, but the reverend had once said that God didn’t live in a building. “I appreciate your concern for me, but I need God to see me through the frightening times and the good ones.”
Her brow wrinkled, and obviously she didn’t agree. “Very well. Only you can make that decision. But Rex and Juan saved you, not some mysterious God.”
“I thought you believed.”
“I believe a God is out there who created the world. Then He retired to His throne and left us to fend for ourselves.”
My heart ached over her words. “Oh, Charlotte, I think God cares about us and acts on our behalf.”
“Then prove me wrong, for I’d like to think different. I’m cynical, and Pete’s murder has left me feeling cold and angry toward God.”
Her words filled me with a sense of purpose. “I’ll do my best.”
She smiled. “I’m glad we can still be friends even though we don’t agree on religious matters.”
“Of course. You are dear to me. Nothing changes that.”
“Good.” She sighed. “Have you talked to Tahoma?”
My heavy heart urged me to weep like a silly schoolgirl. I sniffed and turned my face to the wind in order to mask my watery eyes. “Not since Thursday night. I’m afraid he’s still angry with me.”
“He does come from a different world. What do you know about the Navajo?”
“Very little. He told me once that the focus of every person within his tribe is to live in balance with all that is around him. He said each person is to strive for a state of harmony with nature, each other, and the supernatural. I had a difficult time underst
anding what he meant.”
“Their ways are difficult to understand. Even how they live in large family communities is different from us. Add to that the manner in which we have oppressed them, and you can see how they distrust and dislike any man or woman with white skin.”
“I guess because he was educated in Chicago, I assumed he’d become like us.”
“When you went to see his parents, were you comfortable?”
“Uneasy best describes how I felt. I was afraid I’d insult one of them. But they made me feel welcome.”
“Which is more than what we’ve done for them. We’ve forced our culture, our dress, our speech, our food, our faith, and so much more onto them. Then we take away their rights and give them the land we don’t want.”
“I wonder if Tahoma resented his father’s vow. I know my father did his best for them and funded his education, for which I know he’s grateful. But in guarding me, he’s abandoned his people who need medical treatment.”
Charlotte stared down the road as if she saw something. I hesitated and gripped my rifle. “The situation with him and his people is complicated. They are leery of the white man’s medicine. He’s been back three years, and still many are against him. During these hard times, our government decided the Navajo were raising too many sheep and, as a result, the grasslands were being destroyed. So our government killed hundreds of their sheep—what the Navajo used to feed and take care of their families. I could go on and on about the unfairness, but the situation only makes me angrier.”
“And I questioned justice and fairness about how to obtain information from Walt Chambers. No wonder he’s angry.”
I looked south to the Pedernal and behind those lofty peaks to the Jemez Mountains. All of this wide expanse was home to the Navajo.
“How can I learn more about him and his people? Would his father explain their way of life to me?”
Charlotte stopped beside me, and we both studied the majestic mountain ranges. “From what I’ve heard, Nascha would do anything for you.”