by J. S. Cooper
“You’re such a suck-up, Zane.”
“And you love it.” He paused. “I mean, I’m sure you loved it when I gave you super big tips.”
“You did that on purpose?” I turned around and gasped. “I mean, of course you did it on purpose, but did you do it to suck up to me?” I laughed at his ‘you-got-me’ expression. “I guess I should say thanks. You saved me from getting evicted many times.”
“You were that broke?” He frowned.
“Yes,” I sighed, remembering all the stress from the last year. “My parents didn’t have an insurance policy when they died. I had to use my student loans and credit cards to pay for the funeral expenses.”
“Couldn’t you use money from the estate?” He looked upset and I shook my head.
“There was no estate. My parents were in pre-foreclosure.” I sighed as I remembered the stress they had been in before they died. “They were fighting just to keep the house.”
“I’m sorry.” His voice was tight. “I don’t want you to worry about money with me, Lucky.”
“I don’t want your money, Zane. This can’t be about money.” My throat constricted as I looked up at his face, which was growing increasingly angrier. “Please understand that.”
“I don’t understand why you won’t let me help you.”
“A relationship built unevenly isn’t solid, Zane, and money makes things uneven.” I stared into his eyes, hoping he would understand where I was coming from. “I don’t want to be dependent on you.”
“I want you to be dependent on me. I want to be your provider.” His words came out hoarsely. “I would do anything for you, Lucky. Money means nothing to me. I just want you to be happy and safe. And you’re not going to be safe if you’re on the streets.”
“Well, right now I’m in Los Feliz.” I smiled weakly.
“Yes.” He stared at me for a few seconds and turned away. “What about this one?” He walked over and picked up a cream duvet cover with a shiny silver pattern running across it. I was glad for the change of subject and looked at it.
“I love it,” I beamed. “I really love it.”
“Should we get the matching sheet set, as well?”
“I … uh, sure.”
“I’ll pay.” Zane’s voice was firm.
“No,” I sighed. “I’ll buy the duvet cover. You can buy the sheets.”
“I don’t want you spending your money on me, Lucky.”
“Please, Zane.” I looked at him with pleading eyes, hoping he would understand how important it was for me to do this.
“Fine.” He took my hand and kissed it. “You’re one in a million, Lucky Starr Morgan.”
I blushed as I noticed the stares of those all around us, and my heart stilled at the tenderness in his voice. Everything was going to work out. We’d figure it out. No matter what happened, we’d get over it. Some of the worry in my gut left me and I sidled up to him, cherishing the warmth of his body next to mine.
“Shall we go to the bookstore next?” He kissed my cheek and a flow of electricity passed between us.
“Maybe tomorrow?” I didn’t want to go and look at pregnancy books today. Everything was still so fresh and new between us. I didn’t want that additional pressure and worry to hit us so quickly. “Let’s go grocery shop, so I can make a great dinner for Leonardo.”
“Oh, yes.” He pulled away from me. “You know, Lucky, sometimes we have to do things we think are for the best.”
“Uh huh.” I looked at him suspiciously. “And you’re telling me this because…?”
“I’d do anything for you, Lucky. You are more important to me than I am to myself. Even if that means you being with someone else.”
“What are you talking about?” It was my turn to frown and look at him. “I don’t want to be with anyone else, and I can look after myself.”
“Well, I beg to differ.” He smirked. “I do remember having to rescue you on a certain dark night in Florida.”
“I didn’t need you to rescue me.” I glared at him and pulled away. Sometimes Zane was so obnoxious and annoying that he made my blood boil. I knew he had issues, but there was no way I was going to let him treat me like some 50s housewife who depended on her husband for everything. Even though he wasn’t my husband. I could just imagine if I brought up the word husband to him. I bet he’d freak out. I giggled to myself, imagining what his face would look like. Maybe it would stop him from thinking crazy thoughts and talking even crazier.
***
“Hi, I’m Leonardo. Yes, like DiCaprio, and no, I’m not him.” Leonardo shook my hand and smiled warmly at me. “I had to give you that disclaimer, as I knew you were wondering.”
I laughed at his joke and felt myself relaxing at his warmness. I had been silently worried all night that Zane’s best friend was going to be as cold and as fake as the people at his party.
“Zane didn’t tell me you could read minds.” I grinned back at him and studied his face. He may not have been the real deal, but Leonardo was possibly even better looking than his namesake. He had short, dark blond hair and sparkling blue eyes. His skin was a golden tan and it positively glowed against his white shirt. But it wasn’t his looks that drew me in, it was the warmth and honesty in his eyes. Implicitly, I trusted and liked Leonardo. There was something about him that made me feel special and warm.
“Zane never tells people of all my positive qualities.” He laughed. “He just wants everyone to think I’m just a pretty face.”
“You wish, Leo.” Zane came up behind me and slid his arm around my waist. “I don’t think anyone’s ever said you had a pretty face.”
“Well, the girl last night did,” Leo began and then glanced at me. “Oops, sorry. I forgot I was in the company of a lady and not just a Neanderthal.”
“No problem.” I giggled and ushered him into the dining room. “Please, have a seat. Dinner’s almost ready. I hope you like lamb.”
“I love lamb.” Leo smiled at me warmly. “In fact, it’s my favorite meat.”
“It’s mine, as well.”
“Okay, guys.” Zane grabbed my hand. “Lucky, let me help you finish up in the kitchen.”
“No, no. Stay with your guest.” I pushed him away and walked to the kitchen. I looked back and saw Zane frowning at Leonardo and whispering something hastily at him. Zane looked slightly upset and I stared at him in bewilderment. What was his problem? Leo just stood there smiling, and eventually Zane shook his head and backed away from him. I turned back around quickly and went to check on my herb roasted potatoes. As I checked to make sure they were cooked to a nice crisp, I frowned at what I had just seen. Why had Zane been so upset? He couldn’t have been mad just because we had been lightly flirting, could he?
As I went to pull the salad out of the fridge, my phone beeped and I picked it up from the table. When I saw Leeza’s name, I smiled and opened her text message eagerly. I felt the blood drain from my face as I stared at the words on the screen:
Lucky call me NOW! I’m really worried about you. I have some new information. Zane is not who he seems. Call me now.
I dropped the phone on the table in shock and it slammed down, making a loud noise.
“Everything okay, Lucky?” Zane’s voice sounded concerned as he walked into the kitchen. His eyes looked at me with a worried expression, and I attempted to smile back at him without showing him how anxious I was feeling.
“I’m … it’s fine.” I nodded my head and stood there for a moment, trying to ignore the urge to ask him if there was something he wanted to tell me. “I just need to make a call. Can you pour the wine for me?”
“Sure.” He stood there for a moment as if he wanted to say something else. “Let me know if anything is wrong, please.”
“Sure.” I hurried out of the kitchen with my phone and ran up the stairs and went into my room. I locked the door and called Leeza.
“Lucky?” She answered on the first ring. “Thank God, you’re okay.”
“Wha
t’s going on, Leeza?” I whispered into the phone.
“Lucky, do you remember that guy Evan from the party?”
“Who?”
“The guy I tried to set you up with?”
“Not really?” I frowned. “Can you hurry it up please? I’m in the middle of a dinner party.”
“I saw Evan last night, Lucky, and …”
“Lucky, everything okay?” Zane banged on the door, his voice loud and concerned.
“Yes, I’ll be right out,” I called out. “Leeza, please hurry, I have to go,” I whispered into the phone.
“Lucky, Evan told me that Zane knew …” Leeza’s phone crackled.
“Zane knew what? I can’t hear you,” I hissed.
“My phone has bad reception, Lucky,” Leeza said hurriedly. “But be careful … Zane… Evan said … stalking … blackmailed him …” And then the phone disconnected.
I stood there with my heart pounding. I had no idea what Leeza had been trying to tell me, but from the words I had heard, it didn’t sound like anything good. I felt my blood chill and I wondered at just what I had gotten myself into. I loved Zane, but I wasn’t sure that I really knew him at all. I stood there uncertainly, wondering what to do. I wanted to ask Zane what was going on but it didn’t feel right to question him without knowing the full story. What had Leeza meant? She couldn’t have been trying to say that Zane was a stalker, could she? I just didn’t believe that could be true. It just couldn’t be true.
Chapter 3
Zane
I took a deep breath before going back down the stairs. I wasn’t sure what was wrong with Lucky, but I figured she was having mood swings like most women seemed to have. I took two more deep breaths as I walked down and I tried to calm my nerves as I was still fuming mad at Leonardo. Who did he think he was to flirt with Lucky so blatantly in front of me? I was starting to think that it wasn’t such a good idea to bring him into her life, no matter how close he was to me, or how worried I was. I couldn’t stand to think of her with him, without me. What if she fell for him? How would I feel if they got together? I didn’t even want to think about it. A part me thought that maybe she’d be happier with someone like Leo. He was the epitome of a happy-go-lucky guy. He had money. He was decent. He would treat her well. And maybe he would even love her. Not as much as I loved her, of course, but who said my love was special? Who said my love was what she needed?
Shut up already, Zane, a voice in my head was screaming at me. Stop being such a defeatist and a pussy. If you love her, make it work. I was scared even thinking the love word. I didn’t even really know if I knew what true love was. I didn’t know if I would ever feel the way Lucky felt. I don’t know if I could love and lose and be okay with it. I didn’t want to be okay with it. I didn’t want to put that out into the universe. I didn’t want anyone or anything to think that Zane Beaumont was okay if you screwed with him—‘cause I’m not. I’m not okay with being fucked over. I’m not okay with it. I had already lost my mother and my brother. I wasn’t going to allow myself to get to a point where I’d lose Lucky … I wasn’t even going to continue with that thought.
Leonardo was staring at me as I walked across the room. He had a concerned look on his face and I knew he wanted to ask me a personal question. A personal question I wasn’t interested in answering.
“Everything okay?” he finally spoke and I nodded.
“It’s fine.” I walked to the kitchen. “You want some wine?”
“I’d prefer a beer.”
“I know, man.” I attempted to be cool and laughed. “But Lucky wants to serve wine, let’s go with that for now, yeah?”
“Sure.” He walked up to join me in the kitchen. “She’s nice.”
“Yeah, she is.”
“She’s living with you?” he continued.
“You could say that.” I nodded.
“That was a bit fast, eh? I never heard you talk about her before your call.” His voice was unsure and he looked at me as if he was scared I was going to deck him.
“Why would I tell you about her?”
“I guess no reason.” He sighed. “How’s the case going?”
“We’re close to getting him.” This time my voice was animated as I poured the wine. “We’re so close to getting that son-of-a-bitch.”
“Do you think Noah would have wanted this?” His voice was light and questioning.
“Braydon killed my brother. He’s going to jail.” I was angry at Leo’s question. “He’s a drug dealer and he will kill others.”
“He didn’t make Noah jump.”
“He gave him, I mean, sold him the drugs. Illegal drugs. He has to pay for that.”
“Dude, we’ve all done some drugs.”
“I don’t want to talk about this.” I looked him in the eyes evenly. “I know you’re a good guy, Leo—you’re one of the best. And I trust you. I love you like a brother. You wouldn’t be here if I didn’t think you were one of the best men I knew, but don’t ever talk to me about my brother’s death or Braydon again. I will not stop until Braydon is behind bars.”
“I don’t want it to make you crazy, Zane.” Leo touched my arm. “But I support you, man, whatever you want.”
“Yeah, thanks.” I handed him his glass and took a big gulp of the Cabernet Sauvignon that Lucky had selected. I swallowed it quickly, trying not to grimace. It was a cheap bottle and had a cheap taste. “Pretend you enjoy the wine.” I looked at Leo and grinned. “I don’t want Lucky to feel bad. And she already seems like she’s in a bit of a mood. I just can’t keep up with these women.”
“I don’t have to pretend to a beautiful lady like that. And let me know if you need some help, I can always keep up.” Leo winked and I wanted to punch him.
“Funny,” I said instead and turned away. “Let me go and check on Lucky again and make sure she’s okay.”
I walked out of the kitchen quickly and back up the stairs. I frowned as I walked to Lucky’s bedroom door. It was always a bad sign when Lucky went into her own room as opposed to mine. I wasn’t even sure what was wrong.
“Lucky!” I banged on the door. “What’s going on? Can you let me in?”
“I’m coming.” Her voice sounded a little too cheerful and she opened the door.
“What’s going on?” I tried to look into her normally warm and happy brown eyes, but she avoided my gaze.
“Nothing.” She paused and I saw her lick her lips quickly, while furtively checking her phone.
“It doesn’t look like nothing to me.”
“I was on a call and they said some things about you and I don’t want to bring it up right now because we have a guest and I’m not even really sure what they were saying exactly.” She looked up at me and her brown eyes were wide and slightly worried.
“Who were you on the phone with?” Suspicions grew in my mind. “You weren’t talking with Braydon, were you?” I didn’t hold back the anger in my voice. I knew we hadn’t heard the last of that asshole. “What did he say that’s got you so upset?”
“I wasn’t on the phone with Braydon!” she snapped back at me. “And let’s talk about this later, okay?”
“Why are you mad at me, Lucky?” I grabbed a hold of her hand and pulled her towards me at the top of the stairs. “What did I do to you to get you upset? I don’t even know.”
“Nothing.” She sighed and finally looked up at me with woeful eyes. “I just don’t know, okay? I’m just confused. Everything that is happening is confusing me. I’m worried and scared and I’m mad at myself and I just don’t know what this is, what we are. Who you are.”
“Why are you mad at yourself?” I held my breath. “Do you regret being with me? Do you regret coming here? And what do you mean you don’t know who I am?”
“No.” She bit her lip and I tried to ignore the yearning to reach forward and bite it for her. This was not the time to be having thoughts of sex. “Kind of. I don’t know. You have to admit everything has been moving quickly, Zane. We don’t
really know each other that well. Sometimes I just worry that what we are feeling is …”
“Oh,” I interrupted, then hesitated, trying to cull the feelings of panic swelling in me. “You don’t love me?”
“Oh, Zane.” Her eyes grew huge. “That’s not the issue. One thing I know is that I love you.”
“Okay.” My heart didn’t stop thumping. “But that’s not enough for you, is it?” I ignored the voices in my head that were screaming at me. They had warned me that it was a bad idea to get involved with her. It had always been a bad idea, and now I was going to pay the ultimate price. If she decided to leave me, I would never be all right again.
“I don’t know.” She shook her head, looking worried. “There are just so many things I’m unsure about. What if I’m pregnant? Will I finish school? Will I ever go to grad school? Will we get married? Should I even want to marry you? I barely know you. Am I crazy?” She rambled on and then paused and gave me a small smile. “I sound crazy right now, don’t I?”
“If you’re crazy, you’re the most wonderful crazy person I’ve ever known.” I couldn’t resist the urge to grab a hold of her hand and trace the lines in her palm. I loved the feeling of her skin next to mine, even when it wasn’t in an intimate way.
“And you’re the most wonderful crazy person I’ve ever known, too.”
“Wait a minute. Who said I’m crazy?” I laughed, happy to see the smile on her face. “I know most men wouldn’t date Worzel Gummidge’s twin sister, but I don’t know if that makes me crazy.”
“Zane.” She laughed and hit me in the arm. “Is my hair looking crazy again?” She looked at me self-consciously.
“No.” I tilted her face up to mine and kissed her forehead as I ran my hands through her long, cascading locks. “Your curls look like you.”
“So it does look crazy?” She smiled at me and pushed her arms around my waist before placing her head against my chest. “You’re so warm.”
I brought her closer to me and wrapped my arms around her as I held her warm body tightly against me. The feel of her so close to me made me feel whole. It made me feel complete. Lucky fit me in a way no other woman ever would.