Heartless

by Vanessa Marie

  "What are you doing?" Sarah croaked, half awake.

  "Nothing, go back to sleep."

  Finding what she needed, she scribbled Goodbye on a pad of paper and ripped it off. Each breath she took was heavy as she rummaged though her bag to find something to slide on. Once she was dressed, she headed to Sam's door and slid the note underneath it. Her lip quivered as she realized it was really over. She was done. No more games, no more pain.

  She slipped back into her room and into her bed as she quietly cried herself to sleep.

  Charlie woke up to someone beating on the door and Sarah went to open it with a puzzled look on her face.

  "Where is she?" Sam growled.

  "Uh-in bed?"

  He walked in past Sarah and she shut the door behind him. Charlie was still sprawled out, face down in her pillow. He smacked the back of Charlie's leg with the back of his hand and she jumped.

  "Charlie, get up."

  "Mmmm why?" she moaned, not wanting to move.

  "What is this shit?" he demanded and threw the crumpled note at her.

  She propped herself up on her elbows and picked the wad of a note up. "Exactly what it says. Why are you here?"

  "Are you fucking kidding me? You don't think I deserve an explanation? All I get is this shit?" His chest rose and fell with heavy breaths.

  Charlie laid still, and kept her face passive. She couldn't show him she was dying inside. She'd forgotten Sarah was even in the room until she spoke up.

  "Um...whatever is going on has nothing to do with me, so I'm going to leave you guys alone to hash it out. If anyone asks, you found out she broke curfew and has been sneaking to the pool." She grabbed her bag and slipped out the sliding door. Sam stood beside Charlie's bed with his arms crossed over his chest and his brow furrowed.

  She sat up and crossed her legs. "What do you need me to explain? Goodbye means goodbye, there is no secret meaning or other interpretation for the word."

  "What the hell changed between last night and this morning? Am I missing something?"

  "It was a mistake and never should have happened."

  "You're the one that came to my room remember? It was also you that made it very clear what you wanted. When I told you that we shouldn't, you got pissed."

  "I had a lapse in judgment," she said, with a icy glare even though she was barely keeping it together.

  "You're unbelievable, you know that? I'm done with the games. Grow up, Charlie. You want to be by yourself, fine, I'm done. Enjoy a lonely life."

  He turned on his heel and when he pulled on the door handle, he pulled so hard the door slammed open against the wall and slammed shut behind him.

  Charlie pulled her knees into her chest and sobbed. She'd hurt him and there was no way to repair the damage she'd caused. There was another knock on the door, but she didn't move to answer it.

  She thought back to the night before and after he'd told her no, she was pissed. More pissed at herself than him. He was right but she refused to really admit it.

  One thing she didn't count on, was him coming to her room. She knew everyone would be getting ready to meet for breakfast and she didn't care. She wasn't going. She laid back down and buried her head into her pillow and cried.

  ♥♥♥♥♥

  The rest of the week she did her best to avoid him at all costs. Charlie didn't participate in any of the group activities other than the meals and she couldn't wait for the trip to be over. Then she would only have to see him an hour a day, five days week.

  Charlie never told Sarah or Jules what happened and they didn't ask. She packed her bag and went to wait in the lobby with everyone else. Sarah walked up and stood beside her as she tossed her bag into the pile.

  Sam took everyones room keys and turned them into the front desk. Charlie wanted to be one of the first people on the bus, but their group was one of the last groups to check out. Jules and Sarah were ahead of her, when she got on the only seats left were toward the front of the bus. Jules sat down next to a window and Sarah sat down next to him. There was one seat left open across from them and Charlie didn't realize she was the last person to get on the bus until another kid took the empty seat next to Sarah.

  There was only one row left open and she didn't see Sam anywhere on the bus, shit, no way this could happen again. She hesitated to sit down as she looked at Sarah with pleading eyes. She mouthed to her to switch seats with her, Sarah nodded and stood when she heard Mrs. Cento's voice behind her.

  "Ms. Drake, take your seat. Ms. Evans, take your seat." Charlie turned toward her.

  "Sarah wanted to switch seats with me."

  "There is no reason to switch seats. Take your seats, now."

  Charlie was defeated and it was going to be torture having to sit next to Sam the entire ride home after their last conversation.

  Sarah sank into her seat and mouthed. "I'm sorry."

  Charlie slid into the window seat, put her head phones in and closed her eyes. She must have dozed off, when she woke up she startled herself and didn't remember where she was. She lifted her head when she realized she was leaning it on someones shoulder. Oh shit, please don't let it be him. She lifted her eyes to find Mrs. Cento looking at her.

  "Sorry," she said.

  "It's fine," she snapped.

  She pulled her phone out to see missed texts from Sarah and Jules.

  Hey, are you okay? I tried to switch with you.

  Hey Charlie, I tried to save you a seat but dipshit here took it. I'm sorry.

  She didn't answer either of them and was grateful he didn't sit next to her. When they got to the school she got off the bus and waited in line to get her bag. Sam was standing a few feet away supervising.

  "It's pretty pathetic Mr.Greyson had to babysit you the entire trip because you can't be trusted not to OD again." Quinn shouted up the line.

  "That's it," Charlie growled and threw her backpack down on the ground. She shoved past Jules and Sarah's hands and charged straight for Quinn. Her left arm was cocked back ready to lay out that stupid little bitch when someone wrapped their arms around her torso from behind and lifted her off her feet. They spun her around and set her down. Sam was now standing between them with his arms outstretched.

  "Walk away, Charlotte," He snarled at her.

  "Yeah that's right, walk away, druggie whore," Quinn quipped. Charlie rushed at her again. She wasn't in the mood for bullshit and that stupid bitch running her mouth just pushed her over the edge.

  Sam stopped her again and shouted to Jules and Sarah. "Get her out of here."

  "Aww look your little minions have to escort you."

  "Quinn one more remark and not only will I write you up for bullying, I will call your parents and let them know all of the things you've been up to. I know your mom from the PTA and I'm pretty sure you'd be in deep shit."

  The look on her face was utter shock.

  "You can't say things like that to me, Mr.Greyson."

  "Watch me, now get your stuff and go home. I've had enough of you antagonizing other students."

  "Forget her, she's a bitch," Sarah said, as they pushed Charlie toward her truck. She was so pissed off she didn't want to drive. Jules took the keys and they sped out of the parking lot.

  ♥♥♥♥♥

  Sam was in a foul mood until every last car pulled out of the parking lot. Mrs. Cento walked up to him as she patted him on the shoulder.

  "What was all of that about between Charlotte and Quinn?"

  "Quinn continues to provoke her. One of these days she's going to do it when no one is around to stop it and she's going to get what's coming to her."

  Sam would have loved to see Charlie knock that girl out, even though he was upset with her. He didn't want to see her get expelled when she was so close to graduation.

  "What is she provoking her about?"

  "You really haven't heard the rumors?"

  "Hun, I am not exactly one of the teachers the kids keep in the loop. I am not hip like you are."
<
br />   Sam laughed at how far behind she was on current day lingo. It was the first time he'd smiled in days and it felt good.

  "In all seriousness, what are the rumors? What's the scoop?"

  "It's not worth repeating because its ridiculous."

  "Oh, are they saying she's sexually promiscuous?"

  He smirked, if she only knew.

  "No, they started rumors that the day she collapsed in my class that she overdosed on drugs and has been in and out of rehab."

  "What? Oh my, that poor girl. No wonder she wanted to punch her lights out. She had open heart surgery, didn't she?"

  "Yeah. From what I understand, twice before she left the hospital."

  "Poor thing, no wonder she seems to act out a lot. Unfortunately for you, it always seems to be in your class"

  Sam felt like he could breathe a sigh of relief than no one knew the real connection between them. Quinn was digging for something to fire at Charlie and Mrs. Cento was clueless. The bus driver walked over to the pair of them

  "Uh, ma'am there are three bags left that were never picked up."

  "Oh dear. Do they have any identification on them?"

  Sam assumed they belonged to Charlie, Jules and Sarah due to their rushed exit. He was right, they each had something inside of them that identified who they belonged to.

  "This one has Charlotte's medication in it, we need to get this to her."

  "I'll take care of it."

  "You are a good man, Sam. It's been a long week, I will see you on Monday."

  "See you Monday."

  He pulled his Jeep up to where the bus had pulled away and loaded all of the bags, including his own. As he headed to Charlie's house to drop them off, he wished he didn't have to. He would have taken them to Jules or Sarah's instead but he didn't know where they lived. Her truck wasn't in the driveway when he pulled up, but Joe's was. He grabbed the bags and knocked on the front door.

  "Hey Sam, haven't seen you in a while. Charlie's not here yet, she just texted me they just got back from her trip."

  "Hi Joe, yeah I figured she wouldn't come straight home. She wouldn't want to see me anyway."

  "Come on in, what's all that? You need a hand?"

  "Sure." He handed Joe a bag and carried the other two inside. He set them down on the inside of the door.

  "Why don't you come back and have a beer?"

  "I appreciate it, but I just came by to drop these off"

  "Come on, one beer wont kill ya'."

  "All right."

  Sam followed Joe into the kitchen and sat down at one of the bar stools at the counter. Joe popped the top off of a beer and handed it to him. The cold suds felt great as they ran down his parched throat. Joe leaned against the counter across from him.

  "So what's with the bags?"

  Joe would probably have a lot of questions, but he wasn't going to lie to him anymore. The jig was up.

  "They belong to the three stooges. They left them behind on the bus when they got back."

  "I'm confused here."

  "Joe, I don't want to lie to you. I work at the school, I'm one of her teachers."

  Joe choked on his beer and spit it out. "Excuse me? Did you just say what I think you did?"

  "Yes, sir. I met Charlie before school started. We had no idea, and when we found out, we did our best to end things. And we had, until she collapsed in my classroom."

  Joe took a long pull from his beer like he was trying to process what he was just told. "You've got some balls, dude, telling me this."

  "I don't want to lie to you anymore."

  "I appreciate that. If she wasn't nineteen and who she is... you'd probably have a bullet in your forehead right now. No I take that back, I would have probably enjoyed killing you with my bare hands" Joe said, straight faced and Sam had no doubt that he would be capable of either.

  Sam took a sip and waited a moment before he spoke.

  "I want you to know, I didn't take advantage of her. I love her, even though she doesn't feel the same anymore."

  "Well, thats bullshit."

  "No it's not—"

  Joe cut him off.

  "No, I have no doubt in my mind you love her, I've seen it with my own eyes. If you didn't, I highly doubt you'd be sitting here admitting the truth. I'm talking about her not loving you. She's full of shit. I know my daughter and I've never seen her the way she is around you. She was devastated that night she made you leave and I have no doubt she's doing her best to push you away."

  "Oh she's doing a damn good job at it."

  "It's not you, I hope you know that. It's her issues. She's never been good at opening up and with you, she did and I think it scares the hell out of her."

  "The situation were in at school, I'm doing my best to stay away because it is wrong on so many levels. I'm not a creep, but I can't help the way I feel about her."

  "Well I would appreciate it if you all waited until she graduates. Neither of you need a scandal. You have enough drama dealing with her and her moods."

  They both laughed.

  "I don't think you have anything to worry about. It's done and she made that perfectly clear this week."

  "Is that why she left her bags?"

  "No, that was because she almost beat the shit out of another student who was running her mouth."

  "Oh God, she unfortunately gets her temper from me."

  "Well, I was able to get to her before she threw a punch, so there shouldn't be any issues, but because I made them leave, they forgot their bags."

  "Thank you, Sam."

  "For what?"

  Not only was Sam in shock he still had all of his teeth and he was still breathing, but he couldn't believe how Joe took the news. He hoped he had proved his true character and that Joe really did know how much he loved Charlie, regardless of how she felt.

  "For being a good man. You have no idea the kind of respect I have for you, coming to the hospital like you did and telling me what you did. The current situation, I should kill you for on principal alone, but I understand that kind of pull to someone. I had that with her mom. Just do me a favor would you?"

  "Anything."

  "Don't give up on her. She's dealing with a lot right now that I don't think she's told you about. It's not my place to say anything and she's technically an adult. She must have some kind of reason for not letting you in, but she'll come around. Any father would be lucky to have a guy like you care about his daughter, especially the way you love her."

  Sam smiled, he couldn't believe the conversation they'd just had. He finished his beer and then stood.

  "I need to get going. Thank you for not murdering me," he said, and smirked.

  "I'll walk you out. You're welcome to come by anytime."

  They shook hands at the door and Sam left.

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  They dropped Sarah off first and then drove to Jules' house.

  "So are we going to talk about this, or ignore it?" he asked.

  "What do you want me to say? I lost my cool." She looked out the window.

  "Charlie, you just tried to beat the shit out of her in front of six teachers and the entire senior class. That's not nothing."

  "I'm tired of her running her mouth." She glowered at him.

  "This isn't about her and you know it. What the hell happened between you and Sam this week? I saw him come out of your room and he looked like he was livid." He pulled up to a stop sign and looked at her.

  "Jules, I don't want to get into this again. We got into a fight. We're not supposed to be together. It's not meant to work out. So just drop it okay?"

  He shook his head, and turned the corner onto his street. Jules parked her truck behind Callie's car and they went inside.

  "Hi guys. How was your trip?" Callie asked as she wrapped them both in a bear hug.

  "It was good," Jules said.

  "What did you do all week without us?" Charlie asked, trying to play it cool.

  "Worked, cried, ya' know the usual." T
hey all laughed.

  "Your dad emailed. He said he was going to be able to Skype later tonight."

  "Cool, I'm going to check it now." Jules ran up the stairs. Charlie walked over to Callie and hugged her tight. Callie wrapped her arms around her and held her

  "Are you okay, sweetheart?"

  "Uh-huh."

  "Do you want to talk about it?"

  "No, just wanted a hug."

  "Thats fine by me."

  Charlie fought the urge to cry. She felt broken without Sam and that she let Quinn's stupid comment be the thing that broke her. She never cared what anyone thought of her in the past because she knew her own truth, but her walls were down and she felt emotions she had never been in tune with before. Callie pulled away and kissed Charlie on the forehead.

  "I love you, sweetheart."

  "Love you too."

  Charlie went upstairs to Jules room. He was sitting at his desk with a dumbfounded look on his face.

  "Hey, whats wrong?" he pushed a button on his keyboard and his printer came to life. When the print was done he grabbed the piece of paper off of the tray and handed it to her with the same silent stare.

  Hey Buddy,

  If my timing is correct, you should be getting home from your trip today or tomorrow. I hope you had fun and had some time to unwind and think. I know the last few months have been rough on you and I'm sorry I haven't been able to be there for you. I am happy to hear you finally broke up with that crazy ass Courtney. I never liked that girl and I'm not sure you really ever did either.

  I wish you would have realized that you didn't have to be with her for us or anyone else. You need to be true to yourself bud. Your mom told me how you yelled at her to get out. She said it was so mean, honestly, I laughed when I heard that. I probably would have laughed in her face if I had been home. So maybe its a good thing I'm over here so your mom can't smack me lol. I don't know how else to say this other than to just say it.

  I've known you were gay since you were six, so would you step out of the closet already? I love you and I'm proud of you buddy. The only person you need to worry about making happy is you. Everyone else can go to hell. I'll catch up with you on skype later, I want to hear all about your trip and the shenanigans I'm sure you and Charlie got into. Well I've got to get back to it, talk to you soon.