by M. L. Ryan
Once all the shards of glass were swept up, Alex drove to a nearby home improvement store and purchased a piece of plywood to nail onto the now empty window frame until I could get the glass replaced in the morning. I stayed to make certain that Vinnie didn’t try to escape and end up as some desert creature’s dinner. Between the coyotes, bobcats, hawks and owls, outside is no place for a cat.
When Alex returned, I helped him get the board in place. He didn’t really require much assistance from me; with his supernatural strength, all I contributed was supplying him the nails when necessary. Score one for me; not only was Alex smart, handsome and an attentive lover, but he was handy around the house too.
Content that the house was once again secure, or at least that there was no longer a gaping hole above the sink, I thought it was a good a time as any to find out more about Alex’s family. All I really knew is because he was gifted with many magical talents, as a boy he was sent to train with Sebastian, who also was proficient in more than his fair share of abilities. Through the years, Sebastian had only agreed to impart his considerable aptitude to a chosen few, which meant Alex was quite special in that regard. Beyond that, however, I had very little information about Alex’s life before I met him.
I grabbed a couple of beers from the fridge, popped off the caps and sat down on the couch next to Alex. I handed one to him and he leaned back onto the cushions and swigged down a hefty gulp of the hoppy brew.
“You know,” I began and chugged some from my own bottle, “All I know about your family is that you have one.”
He gazed off into the distance and at first I thought he wasn’t going to give any details. But he shrugged his shoulders and said, “There’s not much to tell. Both my parents are from prominent families and, as is the custom with some of the more…traditional Coursodon, theirs was an arranged marriage. As you know, I have a younger sister, Tannis, who sometimes helps me with the non-dangerous aspects of my work. I also have an older brother.”
He paused and sipped more beer. When he glanced back at me, his facial expression seemed to indicate he was hoping that bit of information was enough to satisfy me. Why do men believe that a few sentences with minimal detail constitutes a complete conversation? Not willing to let him off the hook that easily, I prompted him for more of the particulars with the non-threatening, “Does he have a name?”
Alex sighed and appeared resigned to the continued exchange. “His name is very long and complicated, and since he has never left Courso, he has no human name.”
I waved my hand in a circular motion to indicate he should say it anyway. Sure enough, what came out of his mouth was definitely something difficult to pronounce, much less remember. I didn’t want to always have to refer to him as “your brother,” and the first part kind of sounded like Kin, so I said, “Right. To make things simpler, let’s just call him Ken.”
For some reason, that amused Alex, if his sly, half-smile was any indication. But he still didn’t provide any additional information. Damn it. I was beginning to think I might have to resort to that hokey interrogation technique used liberally in old film noir and pepper him with questions while a bright light shined relentlessly in his eyes.
“Alex, help me out here,” I sighed as I set my bottle down. “I really want to know more about you, but it would be easier to get Vinnie to go willingly to the vet than get anything other than the barest details about your background. But, if you really don’t want to talk about it, I’ll understand.”
I laid the last part on a little heavier than I intended. I truly didn’t want him to feel obligated to give me information. At the same time, however, it made me uneasy that there seemed to be aspects of his life that he didn’t feel comfortable sharing. Of course, given my lifetime of tutelage under the master of manipulation-through-guilt, it was difficult not to use that maneuver as a go-to tactic. I could hear my mother’s voice in my head saying those words and implying if you really cared you would tell me whatever I want to know. Shit. Shit. I had an urge to smack myself repeatedly to punish myself.
Instead, mustering the most sincere tone possible, I added, “I did not mean to sound like a manipulative shrew. You’ll tell me when you feel comfortable.”
Shit. Shit. Shit. That’s even worse. I was appalled that I so easily reverted to another time-honored motherism.
“Oh God, Alex,” I wailed. I was completely mortified, and even covering my face with my hands wasn’t helping. Okay, Hailey. You can convey what you feel in a mature, sensitive way. You’re an adult. Deep breath. “Seriously, you don’t have to tell me. And I don’t want you to feel obligated to tell me.”
I peeked through my fingers at Alex. He put his beer on the end table and scooted closer. Wrapping a comforting arm around me, he kissed the top of my head and whispered into my hair, “Don’t worry. You’re not turning into your mother.”
I pushed away from him and blurted out incredulously, “How the hell did you know I was thinking that? Did you just read my mind?”
Alex pulled me back into his embrace. “I don’t need to be able to read your mind; I just know you. Whenever you freak out like that, it’s usually because you have done or said something that reminds you of your mother.”
“Well, at least I can be thankful that as long as you can’t actually read my thoughts, there’s some chance that you will remain in the dark as to just how screwed up I actually am.”
Alex chuckled and held me closer. “Everyone is screwed up, carisa. That’s what makes people interesting. And I wasn’t irritated that you were asking, it’s just I’m not sure what to say. I only get along well with Tannis; I rarely speak to my parents or my brother.”
“Did something happen to cause a rift?”
“No. I wanted a different kind of life than the one they thought I should have. They believe a career as a Xyzok is beneath me.”
“Then why did they send you off to Sebastian? Wasn’t it so you would become a Xyzok?” I wouldn’t be comfortable shipping a pre-teen off to a well-established boarding school, much less to be taught by a rogue like Sebastian. But that’s exactly what Alex’s folks did when they realized the extent of his magical acumen. Sebastian’s legendary abilities may have qualified him to instruct Alex on the finer points of being magically gifted, but holy shit, his interpersonal skills alone should have ruled him out as a caretaker for children.
Shrugging his shoulders, he replied, “I don’t think it occurred to them that I would find the life of an enforcer appealing. They thought I would only develop my talents under his guidance, not go against a thousand years of family tradition.”
“What were you supposed to have done, join the family business or something?”
A cynical smirk preceded his answer. “Not exactly the family business, but I disappoint them nonetheless.” He placed one finger beneath my chin and tilted my head up off his shoulder. Softly he said, “But that is their concern. I am happy with my choice, and that is all that matters.”
Warm lips covered mine and I relaxed into his inviting kiss. “I think it’s time for bed,” he whispered.
“Sounds like a plan,” I murmured happily.
We got up and started toward the bedroom when I noticed the big plastic bag filled with the remnants of my window still next to the sink. Vinnie loved to jump on trash bags and bite holes in them. I guess he assumes there is always food in them, but in this case, he could get hurt if he chomped into a piece of glass.
I detoured into the kitchen and snagged the sack. “I’m going to take out the trash first. I’ll meet you in a sec.” Opening the back door, I stepped outside and the motion-activated floodlight flicked on. Atop the now-illuminated trash bins sat a large, brown Harris's hawk. Not expecting anything living to be spotlighted during my outing, I jumped as if Jason Voorhees in a hockey mask was sitting there instead of a mere big-ass bird. The poor thing — who was probably out of sorts anyway considering its normal penchant for daytime activity — looked as surprised as I was and took
flight, just barely clearing my head as it disappeared into the darkness. Great, yet another adrenaline rush to add to today's fun. Once my heart rate reached somewhere near normal, I dropped the bag into the closest bin and went back into the house.
This was certainly a day of mental ups and downs. First, I'm surprisingly not completely elated about losing a pain-in-the-ass roommate. Next, I'm overcome — literally, in fact — with erotic satisfaction, followed by almost tranquilizing post-coital bliss. Which was eventually replaced with extended, confused terror, then confused calm, and finally a brief jolt of anxiety.
Fortunately, the emotional roller coaster ended there. After a relaxing shower and an hour of working off some of the evening’s tension with another round of spectacular sex, I fell asleep wrapped blissfully around Alex with Vinnie snoring on the pillow next to my head.
~8~
The next few days were, for a change, remarkably uneventful. Alex and I worked on improving my under-developed other-worldly talents, and now I could elevate small objects up to a foot off the ground and keep them aloft until I decided to let them down. I was thrilled at my progress, but in reality, I was still basically no more adept than a toddler. And while I was getting better at levitating objects, their landings left a lot to be desired. No smooth, delicate descents in my repertoire. Alex insisted I practice on breakable stuff like coffee cups or glasses to force me to concentrate, but like a gymnastic routine, I couldn't stick the dismount. He promised that I would get better, but I'm didn’t share his optimism.
By mid-week, my supply of mugs and such was completely depleted. If I wanted to indulge in my customary cups of coffee the next morning, I needed to make a beverage container run pronto. The most economically prudent choice was a trip to the dollar store, which was conveniently located on the way to my favorite java roaster. Having something in which to put my joe would be somewhat irrelevant if there was none to brew.
Pulling out of the driveway, I noticed a Gila monster basking in the sun near the back door. I stopped the car and got out to take a closer look. I have no clue why they are called "monsters." I suppose it's because they are the only venomous lizard in the U.S, but they are so sluggish that it's difficult to get bitten by one unless you are trying. Basically, you'd have to pretty much shove a finger into their mouth, and anyone that stupid deserves what they get. I think they're kind of cute, actually. Big and stout with a fat tail, the Gila monster's pebbly skin has a beautiful black and orange pattern, with a face that looks like it was dipped in black paint. They are also fairly secretive, hanging out underground most of the time, so I was pleased to see this one.
After the wildlife sighting, I continued off to purchase the accoutrements to maintain my caffeine habit. An hour later, with twelve new, inexpensive mugs and a pound of Guatemalan Oriflama, I was ready to return home. I admit, I felt a little like an addict when, at each stoplight, I jammed the bag of beans into my face and deeply inhaled the heady aroma. That I managed to make it back without hyperventilating from breathing in the scent of Arabica was truly nothing short of miraculous. I imagined being pulled over and the cops yelling, "Drop the bag, lady. Drop it, the beans aren’t worth it."
Surprisingly, the Gila monster was still in the same spot. And even more remarkable was that now there were two others as well. I couldn't recall ever seeing more than one at a time in the wild before. I called Alex out to see the unusual gathering. He was duly impressed, and relieved me of the bag of mugs.
He glanced into the sack. "So many?" You should have more faith in yourself."
I grabbed it back and huffed out an exasperated, "They were on sale."
He was right, though. I didn't want to have to go buy more next week if I didn't kick my two-cup-a-day demolition habit. When I first realized that Sebastian had left some of his magic in me — well, once the initial "Oh shit, what the fuck" part had diminished — I was stoked at all the possibilities. Honestly, who wouldn't be thrilled to have the ability to manipulate the world around them with a mere thought or a simple flick of the wrist? But this was hard work. More draining, in a way, than Sebastian's grueling workouts. Those were physically exhausting, but trying to learn something so completely foreign was wearing on a more basic level. It was like being physically, spiritually, intellectually and emotionally devoured all at the same time. And it didn't help that I sucked at it.
Now that my props had been replenished, Alex suggested I spend some time practicing. In a not-so-subtle attempt to postpone the inevitable, I found a succession of tasks that just had to be done. When I had exhausted all the vaguely believable excuses — making sun tea, eating lunch, checking for important emails — I moved onto the mostly implausible ones. When I insisted the tops of the doorframes had to be dusted, Alex put his foot down.
"Carisa, you are not fooling me," he scolded. "You can only procrastinate for so long."
"Fine. I'll practice. But I don't have to be happy about it," I responded, petulance dripping from every word. But it was difficult to be snippy when he used that term of endearment. Every time he uttered carisa I had to restrain myself from clutching my heart and batting my eyelashes with lovesick obsequiousness, actions which even the mere thought of made me a little nauseous.
He regarded me carefully. "Maybe you would benefit from some variety in the routine. Let's try something different," he said as he guided me toward the sliding door. We went outside and he sat me down at the small, wrought iron bistro set tucked in the shade of the pergola that covered the back patio. Dense vines of bougainvillea snaked over the structure to form a ceiling of magenta flowers and deep green shiny leaves. At least if I had to do something I didn't want to, I could do it in my favorite spot. It was pleasant in the shade, and the view of the desert and the mountains was spectacular.
Reluctantly, I sat down at the table to ready myself for whatever Alex had in mind. Sighing deeply, I considered it might be better to surrender to my short comings and just embrace my maladroitness. Easier, for sure. But I really wanted to be able to do something cool with this gift Sebastian had given me; something that could only be accomplished using supernatural powers. Like make something disappear or get the Senate to scrap the filibustering. But, there was no way I was going to do anything even moderately awesome if I gave up. Damn it, I hate when I get all mature.
Alex sat in the chair opposite me and grasped my hands in his. "Okay, all I want you to do is sit back, close your eyes and relax."
Alex's voice was velvety and calming, but I still gave him a suspicious glare.
"Don't look at me like that. I want to try some mindfulness techniques I read about." My blank stare must have alerted him to the fact that I had absolutely no idea what the hell he was talking about, because he quickly added, "Maybe your difficulties are a result of trying too hard. Mindfulness is an attentiveness to the present. When you're mindful, you experience your thoughts and emotions, but you don't judge them. They just are."
I rolled my eyes and muttered, "Okay, I'll try. But I'm not really into that new-age, touchy-feely crap."
"If it works then it isn't crap."
"If it works, I'll be more than happy to let you lambaste me for my disbelief. But this all sounds way too out-there to me."
"Shut up and close your eyes," he commanded with a grin.
I did what I was told and settled back in the chair and let my eyelids drop. Alex guided me through some breathing exercises before having me envision lifting an object and successfully returning it to its original spot. I pictured the procedure over and over, and each time Alex described how easily the task was accomplished. How the object was elevated because I was letting it rise. How I could elevate it higher and higher and still let it descend in a controlled manner.
Eventually, he stopped prompting and had me visualize it on my own. I admit, it was damn relaxing. When I found myself distracted by a warm breeze, or the scent of desert jasmine, I refocused on my breathing and went back to imagining positive outcomes. I might have even fal
len asleep at some point, but then I heard Alex's voice directing me out of my trance-like state. My eyes blinked open and I felt truly calm and peaceful.
"You want to try it for real?" Alex suggested softly.
My brain did, but my body was so loose, I wasn't completely certain that I could move my limbs. After a few moments to collect myself, I nodded in affirmation and slowly sat forward in the chair. Alex placed one of the new ceramic mugs on the table and leaned back to watch.
Without thinking about what I was doing, the cup rose. Slowly, it ascended until it hovered about three feet in the air. Then, I pictured it moving carefully downward, closer and closer to the table top. I was experiencing but not judging. I was fricking mindful.
When the mug was about six inches from the promised landing, I must have become mindless because suddenly it crashed down and broke into four large pieces.
"Son of a bitch," I blurted out.
Alex shook his head sadly. "You were so close."
"One down, 11 to go," I mumbled under my breath.
I was just about to add a peevish, "I knew this wouldn't work," when I glanced past Alex at the short wall that surrounded the patio. The three Gila monsters sat calmly on the top of the stucco partition. Well, I assumed it was the same three, but frankly, they all look alike to me so it could have been another trio. Slowly, I stood up, and beyond the wall, there was an assortment of animals: jackrabbits, ground squirrels, tarantulas, two coyotes, a mule deer and even a momma bobcat with two kittens. They all just sat there, but I could swear they were staring directly at me. Although I admit that even with eight eyes apiece, it was difficult to gauge exactly at what, if anything, the big, hairy spiders were looking. Since I met Alex, I’d witnessed some bizarre shit. This assemblage of creatures that normally fear and sometimes eat one another just sittin' around chillin' together was truly amazing. And sort of creepy.