by M. L. Ryan
Frustrated and extra hungry from the added energy expended during my fruitless — or in this case fishless — hunt, I was in no mood to try for a rabbit or squirrel. Instead, Alex had the palace staff bring some whole, raw fish out to the garden. I was so famished, I tore into them with gusto even though they were cold and, well, already dead. Not nearly as satisfying as a fresh kill, but at least I didn’t have to keep humiliating myself by crashing ass-first into the surf, only to come up empty-taloned.
Once I’d had my fill, I rode Alex’s shoulder to our suite and transformed back in the comfort and privacy of the bathroom. Alex was a little wary of leaving me to bend on my own but it’s a lot less nerve-wracking without an audience when you end up sprawled on the floor completely naked. After a long, hot shower and a nice steak – rare, of course – I felt tired but mostly normal. Or, at least as normal as I figured I was ever going to feel, given my current predilection for becoming feathery at will. Fatigue finally overtook me around 8:30, and I slept soundly until the next morning.
By the time I made it down for breakfast, everyone had already eaten except for me and Kynkyzalyxch. He watched with amusement as I greedily gobbled down eight strips of bacon, three croissants and four eggs. I’ve never liked runny yolks, but today I asked for the eggs sunny-side-up, my morning menu selection somehow influenced by my recent transformation. I washed it all down with three cups of coffee and I finally felt full.
As I sopped up the last of the yolk with a piece of the buttery roll, Kynkyzalyxch cleared his throat. “I must congratulate you on your coolness under pressure yesterday. My father cannot stop showering you with praise, and we are all grateful no one was hurt.”
“Thanks, but Wyxinorolyxazam was the real hero. I just got out of the way and let him take the jerk down.”
Kynkyzalyxch laughed. “I would have liked to have seen that.”
He asked me some questions about who did what, when and how and listened intently as I described the events. Maybe my initial assessment of Kynkyzalyxch was too harsh, I thought. He seems genuinely friendly and pleasant now. A young woman came to the table to clear away our dishes, and I had just begun to enquire about the daily routine of a crown prince when Kynkyzalyxch held out a hand to stop me from speaking.
He proceeded to lambaste the server. Because he spoke in Courso, I was clueless about the exact nature of the server’s transgression, but nothing seemed amiss either now or before the berating began. The girl hung her head and nodded, squeaking out an occasional one-word response every now and then. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, she retreated from the table, tears in her eyes.
“So sorry for the interruption, Hailey,” he apologized once we were alone. “I don’t know who trains these people, but believe me, whomever it is shall be reprimanded.” He took a deep breath. “You were asking about my official duties?”
As far as I could tell, the girl hadn’t done anything, and however she might have erred, she certainly didn’t deserve to be yelled at. “What exactly did she do wrong?” I asked warily.
“Crumbs. There are bread crumbs everywhere, yet she did not brush them away.”
I examined the table closely. There were a few crumbs here and there, but I only noticed them because he had pointed them out. How someone treats subordinates can reveal a lot about their character and Kynkyzalyxch was either a clean-freak or an ass. Maybe both. Still, he made the girl cry over a couple flecks of bread. It wasn’t my place to point out his bad attitude, but his lack of civility sure squelched any emerging warm-and-fuzzy feelings I might have had.
Fortunately, the awkward silence that followed his “explanation” was broken by the arrival of Alex, Sebastian and Karttyx.
Alex kissed me lightly on the forehead. “I’m glad we found you; Karttyx has some information to share on the assailant. We were just on our way to the sitting room when I heard your voice.”
I popped out of my seat to greet the Xyzok leader, mostly because I was happy to see her, but also because I hoped her presence meant I now had an acceptable excuse to get as far away from Kynkyzalyxch as possible.
Alex glanced over at his brother. “Kyzal?”
The crown prince finished the coffee in his cup and stood. “Much as I’d like to hear any news about yesterday’s unfortunate events, I have to meet with the Undersecretary of Commerce to discuss plans for fostering better trade agreements with Nyqui.” He walked as far as the doorway before he turned and added, almost as an afterthought, “I would appreciate being informed of any developments. Please update my assistant on anything new you discover. And, dear brother, you know I despise being called anything but my full name.”
With great effort, I managed to not roll my eyes in response to Kynkyzalyxch’s pretentious request. He might as well have said, “I can’t possibly be bothered with such trivialities as someone breaking into the palace and trying to kill my brother/father/guests. Brief my lackey; he will keep me in the loop.” Okay, maybe that was a bit harsh. He probably had a busy schedule. It was really his condescending tone that pissed me off. And the temerity of Alex to use a nickname! This guy’s ass was so tight it must be vacuum-sealed.
Apparently, I didn’t disguise my contempt as well as I thought. As we headed to the sitting room, Alex let Sebastian and Karttyx take the lead while we lagged slightly behind. “I sense you feel some animosity toward my brother.”
I really didn’t want to make a big deal about Kynkyzalyxch’s tear-inducing hissy-fit, so I limited my response. “He was being overly demanding of the staff.”
“Did he go ballistic because the knives weren’t all facing the same direction?”
Really? “No, he freaked because of insufficient crumb removal.”
Alex shook his head. “He does have a thing about crumbs. Always has.” After a long pause, he continued. “Sorry you had to witness that, I’m sure it made you uncomfortable. Kyzal, rather, Kynkyzalyxch can be…difficult, but one day, he will make an excellent king. What he lacks in people skills, he makes up for with great attention to detail and a tireless work ethic.”
“How does his wife put up with him,” I wondered aloud.
“Tjryxina? She was well aware of his personality before they married. I suppose she loves him despite his flaws.”
“Or because he will one day be king,” I muttered.
Sebastian chortled. “Don’t be so cynical, my dear. The whole royalty business is hard work. It is just as likely that she truly loves him for his vast wealth.”
This time, I let my eyes roll with gusto. “You know, it’s rude to eavesdrop.” I would have added “ass-wipe” to the end, but Karttyx was there. She didn’t need to know I tended to use expletives like articles.
“Then, my dear, do not speak so loudly that others can hear.”
I wanted to bait him some more, but we arrived at our destination. Wyxinorolyxazam, Rexanatyxa and Tannis were already there waiting so we sat down and Karttyx wasted no time beginning the briefing.
“I have good news and bad news,” she announced. “The good news is we know the identity of the man who accosted Hailey and the King yesterday and we believe he was responsible for the previous attacks on Alexander. The bad news is he killed himself early this morning, so we may never fully understand his motivation.”
Alex didn’t look particularly shocked at the news, but if his narrowed eyes and furrowed brow were any indication, he was definitely not happy. “What happened?” he growled.
Karttyx shook her head. “It’s a bit murky at the moment. The prisoner – Stylexincax Harbernaterla was his name, by the way – was being transferred from the local jail to a more secure location for questioning. Somehow, he managed to break free just long enough to propel himself out of a third-floor window. It all happened so fast, no one had time to even use magic to break his fall.”
“Damn that bastard, taking the coward’s way out. Too bad he is now just a bloody smudge on the sidewalk, otherwise I would be most pleased to defenestrate him mysel
f.” Sebastian’s tone was even, but I could tell he was fuming. Much like Alex, a little vein in his left temple always became more prominent when he was really ticked, and right then it was puffed out like Lindsey Lohan’s collagen-injected lips.
“Yes, it was most unfortunate. I was looking forward to questioning him myself.” Karttyx sighed in frustration. “But there’s nothing to be done about it now. What we do know is this: he snuck in through the service entrance when deliveries were being made. Apparently, there was a shift change of the guards in that part of the palace at the same time and he managed to slip by unnoticed. I suppose the somewhat authentic-looking uniform helped disguise him.”
Rexanatyxa scowled. “The Royal Guard will have to make certain that kind of mistake is never repeated. It would be bad enough for that kind of security breech under normal circumstances, but everyone was supposed to be on heightened alert because of the attempts on Alexander’s life. Disgraceful.” She lifted her hand, and a servant appeared. “Send word to the Guard General that I wish to have a word with him when I am finished here.”
Tannis, who was sitting next to me and Alex on a sofa, leaned over and whispered, “My mother is going to rip the Head of the Royal Guard a new one when she gets a hold of him. He’ll probably be demoted to private before the day is over.” I just loved Alex’s sister.
“As I was saying,” Karttyx continued once the message bearer had backed out of the room. “We believe he happened upon Hailey and the King by chance, and decided to take advantage of the opportunity to force Alexander to come to him. We searched his apartment last night and found a plethora of incriminating evidence including blueprints of the palace, notes on Alexander’s movements in the last few weeks and the address of Hailey’s home in Arizona. We even found an aquarium with skin shed from the Coulubrix he sent in the gift basket.”
An involuntary shudder overtook me. Realistically, I should have realized that whoever was trying to kill Alex had to be watching, plotting, planning. When it was some faceless, nebulous unknown it all seemed vaguely unreal. Having a knife held to your throat by a living, breathing psychopath sort of brings everything into focus. Now that I knew the details, I was actually more creeped out than I was before we knew who was responsible.
“Any indication this Stylexincax Harbernaterla had accomplices?” Alex inquired.
“Not at this time. So far, it appears he acted alone. He was not on any of our suspect lists,” Karttyx continued. “Do either of you know him?”
Alex shook his head. “Never heard the name before today. Sebastian?”
“Does not ring a bell.” Sebastian remarked. “But perhaps this Harbernaterla fellow did not have a tangible motive, at least tangible to a sane person.”
Everyone took a moment to mull that over. He did seem to be a couple of neurons short of a synapse. His first attempts were unlikely to do any real harm to Alex and the last one was so ridiculously brazen it was almost sure to fail. Only the attack outside the restaurant really made any sense, from an assassin’s point of view that is. When you add all that to the plunge to his death, the only logical answer was he was nuts.
Wyxinorolyxazam broke the silent contemplation. “Insane or not, I am most pleased to have this behind us. In the end, no one was hurt and we now know there are some serious holes in our security. If nothing else, this will serve to better protect us in the long run.” He glanced over at me and winked. “And I got a chance to do something manly for a change.”
“You were like my knight in shining armor,” I said, only half-joking.
“I suspect you can take care of yourself just fine,” he replied.
Rexanatyxa nodded in approval. “I’m sure she can, Wyx. You, on the other hand, must promise me to never, ever try to play the hero again. You are too old for such nonsense and besides, I don’t know what I would do without you.” The king placed his hand on the queen’s knee and they shared one of those moments of which only couples who have been together for a long time are capable; full of memories, shared experience, devotion and love. I actually got a little misty at the display, and had to cover my sentimental reaction by pretending there was something stuck in my eye. Not a particularly clever ruse, but sometimes a girl just has to make do.
Their public display of tenderness was fleeting, however. Rexanatyxa patted her husband’s hand and all the warmth and affection that radiated from her mere seconds before was packed away. She morphed back into regal-mode with practiced aplomb. All business, steely resolve. “Now that all this unpleasantness is over, what are your plans, Alexander? We certainly would love to have you both stay on for a while and I’m sure Hailey can benefit from more training with Hewlyxnathin.”
Alex looked at me and then back at his mother. “With everything that has transpired in the last 24 hours, I really haven’t thought about that at all. You are correct about the Yterixa training, mother. I think there is much more she can learn. But, this is a decision Hailey and I must make together.”
“Of course, but know that I am hoping you choose to stay. Rexanatyxa looked directly at me as she continued, “I see so little of Aldex, and a mother, even if she is a queen, still needs her children.”
I smiled politely, but mentally grimaced. Yep, there was a lot jammed into that comment. No pressure, Hailey, but I’m counting on you to convince my baby boy to continue to take advantage of the hospitality. I had to hand it to her; she knew the passive-aggressive tactic probably wouldn’t work on Alex, so she directed it all to me. Shit, what is it with mothers trying to sway me by zeroing in on my over-developed sense of remorse? There must be a flashing neon sign on my head that is only visible once someone has given birth that says “Easy to Guilt Trip.” That was an excursion I’d taken many times, but, I hoped now, the boat could sail without me.
~26~
As it turned out, Alex and I were on the same page when it came to extending our stay. Being in Courso was great — the transcendental arousal alone made the journey worthwhile — but the royal lifestyle wasn’t one either of us enjoyed. I hated having the staff insist upon doing the most basic tasks for me. For the first week, I had to argue with my assigned “chambermaid” that I was quite capable of turning on the shower myself. And the nightly family meals, complete with cocktails before and brandy after were getting old. We both recognized that additional Yterixa training was needed, but I needed to learn to master it in the human dimension. Besides, I missed my cat. Fortunately, Hewlyxnathin was more than willing to come to Arizona once a week to continue our work. Karttyx had been waxing poetic about the local cuisine and he jumped at the chance to sample the Sonoran hot dogs.
We planned to depart in a couple of days. Rexanatyxa took the news fairly well. She said all the right things with only a hint of her disappointment leaking through. Alex assured her that we would be back for a visit soon, and she vowed to hold him to that promise. She did, however, want to have a lavish going-away party. It took a lot of convincing, but we finally managed to agree on a small, casual gathering the next evening. I crossed my fingers that “small” meant something less than the 30 guests at our welcome bash, and “casual” wasn’t code for fancy, just not floor-length, dresses.
The next evening, I was pleased to find Frydinyx had delivered a comfortable, belted, bright turquoise tank dress with a fun, latticed back. No surprise, it fit perfectly and came with matching ballet flats. Of all the perks the palace provided, the only thing I was going to miss was how fantastic clothing simply appeared whenever needed, always event-appropriate, and never requiring alterations. Alex was provided taupe, raw silk trousers and a loose, white shirt made of some incredibly soft and drapey material. Gotta hand it to Frydinyx, he knows what makes Alex look sexy.
Surprisingly, Rexanatyxa made good on both her promises. Aside from Alex’s family, the only other attendees were Sebastian, Karttyx and me and the meal was a buffet. A lavish, over-the-top buffet with enough food to feed five-times the number of people invited, but a buffet nonetheless. It w
as probably a stretch for the chefs to do anything other than the typical sit-down dinner. The dress code was palace-casual, which to me was still dressed-up, but at least Rexanatyxa wasn’t wearing the crown jewels tonight. I couldn’t wait to get home and put on some jeans and flip-flops.
After all that had happened assassin-wise, the party provided a nice, quiet ending to my journey to the other side. Everyone was relaxed and happy. Even Kynkyzalyxch maintained a pleasant façade throughout and miraculously didn’t say or do one thing to piss me off. I even got a chance to have a conversation with Tjryxina. She was surprisingly genuine and downright normal. So much so, that when she mentioned that she and the Kynkyzalyxch were trying to provide an heir to the realm, I knew Sebastian had been wrong when he speculated that the reason for their lack of success in that department was because it was difficult for Kynkyzalyxch to have sex with his head jammed so far up his ass. He had to have some redeeming qualities, other than being royal and rich, that made her love him.
Alex, Sebastian and I left the next morning. We used the marqizoborta system and within an hour, popped out into the human dimension, in an isolated, swampy area outside of New Orleans. At least now I understood why Alex had insisted we all put on hip-waders. When I asked why we couldn’t just emerge somewhere closer to Tucson, I thought there would be a complicated explanation involving magical bylaws or geographic phenomena. It turned out the only reason was Sebastian had a craving for crawfish etouffee.