by Unknown
“Vervain,” Arach sighed. “She shouldn't have said that to you.”
“Well, I guess someone needed to,” I shrugged. “And if you had said it, I would have ripped you a new one.”
“A new what?” He frowned.
“A new hole in your ass,” I giggled, knowing how he'd take that.
“A what?” His eyes narrowed on me as Fionnaghal started giggling along with me. “That's the most ridiculous threat I've ever heard. How exactly would you rip me a new asshole?”
“Well it wouldn't be perfect, mind you,” I started laughing full out. “But I could definitely put another hole there.”
“Ridiculous,” he shook his head as we all laughed, even the children, who heard our merriment and simply responded to it. “Still, we have forever to think about babies.”
“Forever is a long time and time has a way of changing things,” I whispered, a new weight settling over my heart as my laughter was swept away with the breeze. I thought about baby Zariel and how my death would most likely result in hers. At least any child I had with Arach would be strong on her own and Arach would make sure she was taken care of if I died.
“And this is why I don't want her pressured,” Arach waved a hand toward me. “Do you see this? Look at her face. Please don't press the Queen about children, Fionnaghal.”
“Yes, King Arach,” she nodded seriously.
“And if you can,” he added. “Spread the word about that.”
“Arach,” I groaned. “Leave our people be.”
“Do you truly want all the fire fey pestering you about the children you're not ready to have?” He lifted a brow at me.
“Well, no, not really.”
“Then, Vervain,” he grinned, as if relishing every word. “Do shut up or I shall rip you a new one.”
Chapter Eighteen
That night I dreamed that I was walking down a frozen tunnel, making my way toward a pedestal at the end. On the pedestal was a book. I couldn't see it clearly but I knew what book it was, knew it would have a nine-pointed star on the cover and knew it contained spells that worked on souls. I was nearly to it when the star lifted off its cover and floated into the air above it. It hovered there a moment, shining bright white, and then drifted towards me, coming to a stop directly in front of me at chest level.
I reached for it and as I did, my hand altered, changing into a paw. It was a paw I was unfamiliar with. I know that's an odd thing to say but I've shifted to lioness numerous times and even to dragon but this paw wasn't a lion's and it wasn't the claw of a dragon. It was-
“A wolf paw, how interesting.”
I looked up and locked eyes with Daryl from The Walking Dead. He was all decked out in his zombie hunting gear, crossbow slung over his shoulder and hair falling into his eyes haphazardly. I blinked, looked from my paw to his face and back again. Then I noticed his eyes, they weren't quite right and there was something about him.
“You!” I pointed my paw at him in accusation as the star in front of me faded away. “Why do you look like Norman Reedus?”
“You like this man,” Vex shrugged. “I saw him in one of your dreams, so I thought I'd give the look a try.”
“You've been in my dreams without me knowing?!”
“I can be very quiet,” he grinned.
“Oh! What are you even doing here, Vex?” I placed paw to hip. “I'm in Faerie, you shouldn't be able to reach me.”
“Well that's just silly,” he laughed, flinging his Daryl bangs out of his eyes. “You're not in Faerie anymore, Toto. This is the Realm of Dreams. You're in my world now.”
“First of all, good movie reference,” I growled. “Second, what the hell do you mean Realm of Dreams? There's another realm? I just got used to the whole Void thing and now you're telling me there's another realm?”
“There are many things that exist without your knowledge of them,” he leaned casually against the icy wall, flinched, then waved his hand and the ice faded away.
“Yes, Obi Wan, I'm sure there are,” I rolled my eyes. “Couldn't you have let me go on living in ignorance?”
“Why would you want to do that?”
“Because ignorant people are happier,” I nodded, then noticed my paw again. “Speaking of ignorance, I wonder what's up with the wolf paw. It's so weird.”
“You're weird,” he looked me over. “What are you exactly?”
“I told you what I am.”
“Not everything obviously,” he gestured to the paw. “What else are you? What's with the star?”
“What's with all the questions, Detective Tutuola?”
“Oh tricksy, tricksy,” he grinned. “I don't know that reference.”
“Law and Order but never mind,” I waved it away. “I just realized we got sidetracked. What's this Dream Realm and how can I be in it?”
“It's a realm similar to the Aether and the Void,” he peered down the tunnel toward the book on the pedestal. “There are no physical bodies here. When you dream, your mind projects into it, in much the same way you project your desires into the Aether to manifest a spell. Except the Dream Realm pulls your mind fully within it, your own private portion of it to be exact.”
“But you can travel between those private portions?” I narrowed my eyes on him.
“I'm able to enter it in a different way,” he smiled slowly, like a predator. “Like how gods pass through the Aether or enter the Void.”
“I had to astrally project into the Void,” I chewed at my lip. “Is that what you do to enter the Dream Realm.”
“No,” his smile turned secretive. “I have my own ways but then, I'm God here.”
“Not here, here,” I pointed to the ground. “This is my dream, my portion of the realm, I rule here.”
“Fair enough,” he jerked his head in acceptance. “But your rule isn't strong enough to keep me out.”
“Bullshit,” I huffed. “I could block you out if I wanted to.”
“From your mind, maybe,” he looked so smug and I didn't like that look on Daryl's face. “But not from my realm.”
“I did it last time.”
“You put up a wall around yourself in the dream, you separated us,” he shook his head. “But you couldn't push me out completely.”
I immediately tried to put up a wall around my thoughts but he was right, these weren't just thoughts. This was a realm that my thoughts had become a part of and it had its own rules. I wouldn't have been able to block another god from traveling through the Aether and I couldn't block this one from traveling through the Dream Realm. I ground my teeth as he laughed.
“What do you want, Vex?” I snarled.
“I want to know what you are,” he said simply. “Tell me and I'll go.”
“Really? Just like that?”
“Yep.”
“I'm a triple trinity being. I have three collections that make me complete; three races, three magics, and three beasts.”
“Wow,” he blinked. “A triple trinity. That's very interesting. I know the three races. What are the magics and the beasts?”
“I'm the Goddess of Love, Lions, and the Land,” I explained begrudgingly, “and I hold wolf, lion, and dragon.”
“But why is the wolf so important?”
“You said you'd go.”
“Just humor me,” he shoved off the wall and came to stand in front of me. “Why the wolf?”
“She's the one beast I can't shift into,” I frowned, realizing it just as I spoke the words. “I got her from my bond with Trevor, she's originally a piece of his soul and I've never been able to become a wolf.”
“Well,” he looked at the paw. “I'd say that's about to change. Oh, and by the way, I like the name Vex.”
Then he was gone and I was waking up, looking across my pillow at Arach's sleeping face. I pulled my hand out from beneath the covers and saw that it was just a hand, not a paw. Had Vex been right? Could I shift into a wolf now? I felt a shiver of excitement rush through me. To be able to run with Trev
or as a Froekn would be wonderful but all magic had its cost. Had the price for this been paid already or was the bill about to become due?
Chapter Nineteen
I stayed in the Faerie Realm until February seventeenth so I could travel home in the normal way(as much as anything in my life could be called normal) through the Aether. I didn't see Vex again, much to my relief, and I hadn't tried to shapeshift into a wolf either. I wanted to save that for Pride Palace and Trevor. That way, if I was able to shift, I could share the news with him right away. Not being able to would have driven me nuts.
So as much as I hated leaving Arach, it was with great anticipation that I headed home to the God Realm. I traced into our tracing room and walked out to the sound of male voices. I smiled and headed into the dining hall to find a few Intare sitting with Trevor and Kirill, having lunch.
“You're back,” Trevor jumped up and came over to give me a hug. “You're a little late, you know.”
“I didn't use my ring this time,” I explained as I walked with him back to the table. I leaned in to give Kirill a kiss hello and then took Trevor's chair, which had been beside Kirill. Trevor took the open seat beside mine. “I waited till the time caught up and then just traced back.”
“I zink zat's better vay,” Kirill nodded.
“Definitely,” Trevor agreed. “It's good to know you're not so far away anymore.”
“And if I needed to jump over to Faerie, I could,” I added. “I wouldn't have to send someone else, worrying that I'd be screwing things up.”
“So how's the Lizard King?” Trevor offered me a bite of his sandwich but I shook my head no.
“Arach's fine. Everyone's doing real well with winter now. I think they're even enjoying it.”
“Gasp,” Aidan laughed. “Fire fey enjoying winter. Hey, did you see Roarke? He hasn't been around for awhile.”
“He's a father now,” I shrugged. “And a king. He's got things to do. Maybe some of you should go visit him.”
“We can do that?” Lucian raised his eyebrows at me.
“Sure, why not?”
“I don't know, I just never considered it.”
“Just let me know when you want to go, so I can tell Arach to expect you,” I smiled, thinking of how much trouble a bunch of Intare and fire cat-sidhe could get into. “He's got some new fire cats now. Some are even women.”
“Female fire cats?” Aidan perked up. “Are they hot?”
“They're fire cats,” I rolled my eyes.
“No but I mean, are they attractive?” Aidan persisted.
“Aidan,” I leveled a look on him. “They're fire cats. Of course they're all beautiful, some in unusual ways.”
“Sweet,” he grinned. “I'm so going.”
There was a round of agreement and I chuckled to myself. I don't know how Roarke was going to feel about the Intare checking out his female subjects but it would sure be fun to watch.
“Oh, Trevor,” I looked over to him. “I'd like to head out to your cabin today if you have time. There's something I need to talk to you about.”
“You wanna talk to just me?” He shot a look over to Kirill, who shrugged. Kirill knew I needed private moments with each of them to make our situation work.
“Yes, just you,” I nudged him. “Can you go with me today?”
“I'll go with you right now,” he jumped up and offered me his hand.
I laughed at his excitement, feeling it urge me on as well. He loved the valley I'd made for him and so I'd thought it would be the perfect place to surprise him with the possibility of me shifting into a wolf. Hopefully the surprise would be a good one and I'd be able to make the shift but if not, we could comfort ourselves with some sex in the woods.
We made it to the mountain in record time and soon we were standing on the ridge that overlooked the valley. We ran down the ridge with the ease of wild things and ended up on the banks of the lake. The sun reflected off its calm surface, shining in my eyes for a moment. I squinted up at Trevor and he shifted forward, blocking me from the glare, an unconscious move that said so much about him. About how he felt for me.
“I love you more than air, you know?” I whispered to him.
“More than ice cream?”
“Much more than ice cream,” I said seriously. “You don't melt into a milky puddle.”
“I can't understand how you can like ice cream and not like milk,” he followed my tangent.
“The same way I can like tomato sauce and not tomatoes,” I shrugged. “They become completely different entities when you combine them with other things. The addition makes them better. Just as I'm better when combined with you.”
“Oh that was slick,” he nodded with approval.
“You like that?”
“Are you trying to seduce me?”
“Do I really have to try?” I gave him a long kiss, enough to almost distract me from the reason I'd brought him out there.
“I think you could probably just grunt at me and I'd be in the mood,” he laughed.
“Excellent,” I pulled back, “but that's not why we're here.”
“Oh? Is this a serious talk?”
“Kind of,” I scrunched up my face. “I don't want you to get too excited but I've had an unusual dream and it's led me to believe that I may be able to shift into a wolf now.”
“What?” His face went slack.
“I wanted to try it with you for the first time,” I took a deep breath. “I thought we could make the attempt out here, just the two of us.”
“You discovered this in a dream?”
“Yes, it was a really weird dream but I think it was trying to tell me that becoming complete hasn't just taken away my ability to drain gods, it's given me something as well.”
“I see you remembered to bring back your emerald,” he touched the emerald pendant around my throat lightly. “Maybe you'll still be able to use this to pull a god's power from them and drain it into the earth, even if you can't take it for your own.”
“Hopefully,” I nodded and took the necklace off. “But for now, there's a different magic I'd like to try.”
“Now?” He looked nervous. “You're just gonna jump right into it?”
“You wanted to wait?”
“No, I just...” he gave a short bark of laughter. “Yeah, let's do it. Do you want me to go first, so maybe you can get a feel for what it's like?”
“I think that's a great idea,” I nodded.
Trevor pulled his clothes off and I ogled him of course. He had a body which you couldn't help but ogle if you were inclined to enjoy the male of the species. He grinned at me, knowing exactly the effect his nudity always had on me, and then a haze settled over him and his body seemed to condense. He became an amorphous collection of potential and then it took shape, legs and head pulling from the lump of magic and shifting into a huge wolf. It all happened in seconds but unlike all the other times I'd seen him shift, this time I was paying close attention and I was able to catch it all.
He came forward slowly, a large black wolf with honey-colored eyes, and nudged me with his nose. Since his head was chest level with me, his nose ended up sliding into my armpit.
“Agh,” I jumped back. “Cold and wet. Bad wolf, no biscuit!”
Trevor made a wheezing sort of noise that I think was a laugh. Then he nudged me again.
“Okay, okay already.” I pulled off my clothes and added them to his pile.
It would go quickly. I'd shifted before so I knew the drill. If I couldn't shift right away, I'd be relatively certain that I didn't have the ability. I took a deep breath and centered myself, then I looked inside and called my wolf forward. I felt her rising up inside me, as excited as I was about the chance of being free, released into the world. I felt my body shift to accommodate her, changing into something ambiguous, as Trevor had. Then I was on all fours, soft paws in the grass and claws digging into the earth. I tried to retract them but they wouldn't budge. I guess wolf claws weren't like cat claws.
>
A look down my body showed me a pure white pelt, kind of shocking since Trevor was completely black, but then I realized that she had become the opposite of what she had been with him. As a part of Trevor's soul, she'd been male, a wolf with a black coat. When she became mine she had to change into female and so now was a she-wolf with a white pelt. Balance. Two halves to make a whole.
Then Trevor yipped excitedly and did a happy little wolf dance around me, connecting with the missing piece of his soul in a way that he'd never been able to before. I got caught up in his excitement and danced along with him, then followed him as he took off into the woods.
Brush flew by as we raced through the trees surrounding the lake. I could hear the rustling of small creatures and smell them on the wind but I was having way too much fun chasing my mate to bother with them. I nipped at his tail and he shot me an amused glance over his shoulder.
Then we were running up the mountainside, my paws finding easy purchase on both rock and soil. The agility in the wolf body was amazing, better than a lion or even a dragon(at least on the ground). I felt like I could climb trees vertically if I wanted to. Then we broke free of the trees and stood perched on a cliff, overlooking a wall of impenetrable mist. The border of my territory. I'd never seen it up close before.
Trevor howled and I joined him, our cries taken by the wind and swallowed up by the magic wall before us.
Chapter Twenty
The run with Trevor had somehow sparked my creativity and I woke up the next day feeling as if I needed to create something. It had been awhile since I'd set paint to canvas and I really needed a little artistic release. So I was busy, lost in my own world, consumed with colors and angles, light and shadow. Enveloped in the scent of linseed oil and turpentine when Griffin came into the bedroom.
I had a little art studio in a corner of the bedroom at Pride Palace. It was close to the windows that looked out onto the balcony at the front of the palace, so I could get a lot of natural light. There were drying racks along the wall, right next to my work table that held all of my tools and mediums, and a sink beside the table. My easel was set up facing the window so that I could utilize the light but not have it glaring on the wet paint. Leaning against the front wall with the windows were several finished canvases. It was there that Griffin headed, shocking me when I finally noticed him.