by Cathy Cole
“Hans the hero doesn’t have a very heroic dog,” Josh pointed out.
“It’s a killer dog,” Lila said breezily. “Any minute now it’s going to jump up at Mr Wrinkles and bite him to death.” They both watched the soggy spaniel hurl itself into the sea, drenching half the wedding party. “It’s just going swimming before its death mission,” she added.
Josh was laughing so much he could hardly hold his pencil straight. Lila felt a warm glow deep in her belly. She loved making Josh laugh.
“That has to be your best-ever story,” Josh said, wiping his eyes. “What do you think of this?”
Lila stared at the bold lines Josh had drawn. Mr Wrinkles in evil reflective sunglasses, Maria the bride wearing a glamorous wedding gown but with hate blazing in her eyes, Daddy in the helicopter. Hans the hero and his unheroic dog. She felt so envious of Josh’s skill she could hardly breathe. What must it be like to have a talent like his? she wondered.
Josh pulled her into his arms. “You’ve gone quiet. Don’t you like it?”
“It’s brilliant,” said Lila. She felt a little sad.
“I can’t wait for my course to start,” he said happily, making a few adjustments to the shading on Maria’s bridal gown. “Mr Spiegelman’s taking it up at the uni. I introduced you once. The old guy who owns the graphic-novel shop in the Old Town, do you remember? He’s worked with all the greats. I’m going to learn so much with him.”
Lila wondered if Josh would remember her when he was a famous illustrator and she was a nobody still waitressing at themed weddings, daydreaming her life away.
“It’s only one day a week,” Josh said, misreading her silence. “We’ll have lots of fun together the rest of the holidays, just like you said at the party last night – I promise.”
He reached for his sketchpad again, but Lila knocked it out of his hand. “No more drawing,” she said, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him, deep and sweet.
She wished they could kiss for ever, and that the future would never come.
THREE
It was only ten o’clock on Monday morning, but Lila was already bored. She’d got used to the rhythms of school life, the regular trips to the Heartbeat and her days at the beach with Josh. Without school and without Josh, only the Heartbeat was left. Somehow she didn’t think anyone would be hanging out there on a Monday morning.
She pictured Josh up at the uni, drawing up a storm and impressing everyone in the class. She wondered if any girls were taking the course with Josh, and instantly felt depressed. They would all be beautiful and talented and a lot more interesting than she was.
After taking the longest shower she could manage, and spending half an hour longer on her hair and make-up than she normally did, Lila gave herself a talking-to in front of her bedroom mirror.
“You need to get a life,” she told her reflection.
You think I don’t know that? said her inner voice. It wasn’t helpful.
“What are you up to today, love?” Lila’s mother asked down in the kitchen.
Lila took a bite out of an apple from the fruit bowl as, finally, an idea came to her. “I thought I’d go and visit Polly at her market stall,” she said. “I might look for something Tim or Alex would like, since they’re coming up for your anniversary.”
Her mother shook her head in wonder. “I can’t believe I’ve been married to your dad for almost twenty-five years,” she said. “Where did the time go?”
Lila thought about this as she walked into town. Where did time go? How could anyone lose track of twenty-five whole years?
The market was already busy when she arrived, the striped awnings shading shoppers from the bright July sunshine. Lila wandered between the shaded stalls, picking up plates and scarves and trinkets and putting them down again. She felt restless. Disconnected.
“Lila!”
Lila’s mood improved at seeing Ollie waving at her beside Polly’s stall.
“Nice choice, Ollie,” she teased, pointing at the dress in Ollie’s arms. “The colour will really bring out the blue in your eyes. You should try it on.”
Ollie hung the dress – a pretty thing with a fitted white top with a strapless sweetheart neckline and full skirt in a deep dark blue – on a rail and wiped his hands down his trousers. “And scare off Polly’s customers?” he said in a good-natured way. “I don’t think so.”
Lila could hardly see Polly for shoppers crowded around her rails. She waved to get Polly’s attention. Polly flapped her hand in a distracted sort of way before a customer put their head around the small tented area she’d set up as a changing room and asked for the mirror.
“She’s really busy,” Ollie said proudly. “People can’t get enough of Pol’s designs.”
Lila could see what Ollie meant. Already the blue dress had been snatched off the rail and was being “ooh”ed over by two girls she recognized from school. She felt the old stab of familiar envy. Lucky Polly, to be so good at this.
“Excuse me, what can you tell me about this piece?”
Ollie swung round. “Um,” he said, gazing at the coral and gold necklace in the the customer’s hand. “It goes around your neck, I think.”
Lila had to giggle. As Ollie did his best to help the customer, she gazed at the next stall along. It was selling stationery: notebooks, pens, writing paper, cards and envelopes. She selected a card for her parents’ anniversary first, then ran her hand over the brightly coloured woollen covers on the notebooks. Each one was different.
“Four ninety-nine,” said the girl behind the stall, noting her interest. “I make the bindings myself from felt.”
Lila picked up a book with a sea-green cover. The wavy lines of the felted cover reminded her of the tide tur ning in the bay, while the paper was thick and creamy coloured and faintly scored with lines. It felt heavy and solid in her hands. Perfect for a diary.
Any diary you wrote would be a riot, she thought wryly. Got up, went to school, wondered about the future, went to bed, repeat for ever.
She bought it anyway and tucked it into her bag beside the card.
It was no good trying to talk to Polly and Ollie now – the Turned Around With Love stall was busier than ever. Pulling out her phone and retreating to a quieter part of the market, Lila dialled Eve’s number. Eve was always up for a bit of shopping and a gossip over a coffee.
“Hey,” said Lila hopefully. “What are you up to?”
Eve’s voice was faint through a loud thumping noise in the background. “Sorry babes, I can’t hear you very well. Becca and I are auditioning bands for a big fundraiser Caitlin’s organizing in London next week. I have indie rock coming out of my ears. Hello? Are you still there?”
Auditioning bands? That sounded like fun. Lila raised her voice. “Need any help?”
“Sorry darling, I can’t hear a thing. I’ll be at the Heartbeat on Wednesday like we arranged, see you there at noon. I have some great new ideas to make your parents’ secret wedding anniversary party go with a swing.”
Eve rang off. So much for shopping, Lila thought a little grumpily.
Their parents’ surprise party had been her brother Alex’s idea. He’d rung Lila out of the blue a couple of weeks earlier to suggest it.
“We’ll get all the aunties and uncles and friends they always write Christmas cards to but never see. Dad will go mental. He hates surprises.”
Lila had giggled at the thought. “Dad takes himself too seriously. A party is just what he and Mum need. Do you think we should tell Tim? He’s hopeless at keeping secrets.”
“Leave our brother to me,” Alex had said. “I’m better at threatening him than you are, he won’t squeal. Know anyone who’s good at planning parties?”
Lila had barely raised the idea with Eve at school before her friend was making lists and phoning people. Not for the first time, Lila was gratefu
l to have Eve on her side. Everything was almost in place for the party, and they still had four days to go. Wednesday’s meeting was all about finalizing the details.
It was midday, according to her phone. The day was dragging by like a snail.
Someone will be at the Heartbeat by now, she decided. Rhi and Brody, most likely.
Feeling energized again, Lila left the market and headed for the Old Town.
“Hi, Mr Wills,” she said as she pushed open the café’s wooden door. “Is Rhi around?”
Rhi’s father looked up from restocking the bar with crisps. “She’s in the usual place,” he said, looking at the ceiling. “She and Brody have been singing up there since ten this morning.”
Lila took the stairs two at a time, towards the rehearsal room in the attic. Outside, the sky was blue. She itched to get back outside and feel the warmth of the sun on her skin. She’d ask Rhi and Brody to join her at the beach.
It was hard to tell at first which of the two people wrapped up in each other’s arms was Rhi and which was Brody. Lila froze, her palm still on the attic room’s door handle. Keen not to disturb them and make an embarrassing scene, she tried to close the door again.
Rhi noticed first. “Lila!” she said, breaking off mid-kiss with an embarrassed giggle. “Sorry, you caught us, uh, rehearsing. How’s it going?”
Brody twirled one of Rhi’s curls between his fingers and smiled at Lila.
“OK,” Lila said, feeling horribly embarrassed. “I just wondered if maybe … never mind.”
“You want to hang out?” Brody asked. “We were about to run through a new song. Do you want to hear it?”
“Stay,” said Rhi, holding out her hand to Lila.
But the last thing Lila wanted to be was a spare part today.
“Some other time,” she said, closing the door. “Have fun.”
She could hear them both laughing as she headed back down the stairs again.
She stood in the cobbled lane outside the Heartbeat Café’s doors, and wondered what to do next. Everyone was busy. Everyone was getting on with their lives except her.
You wanted to go to the beach, she reminded herself.
Squaring her shoulders, she set off towards the silvery sand. So what if she was by herself? Loads of people walked on the beach by themselves every day. Loads of friendless losers, the voice whispered.
She sat on the beach in her and Josh’s usual spot, her arms wrapped around her knees, and tried to think positive thoughts. It was hard. She found her mind drifting back to her old friends in London. Flynn and Iris and Leo. They’d be on their summer holidays now, same as she was.
Something stirred in her belly. She would text them, invite them to Heartside to visit over the summer. Pleased with the idea, she pulled out her phone.
Hey!!! Long time no speak.
Anyone fancy a trip to the beach?
Lil xx
Flynn responded first.
LILZ!! Too long, girl. Busy babes but will text SOOOOON
F xx
Leo was next.
Great to hear ur news xx
Lila frowned. She hadn’t given Leo any news. It was clear he hadn’t read her message properly.
Iris didn’t respond at all. She’ll have lost her phone, Lila decided as the time stretched away without a reply. Iris is always losing her phone.
Trying not to feel downhearted at the way her old friends were getting on with their lives without her, Lila tucked her phone into her bag and lay down on the sand to stare at the puffy white clouds drifting by overhead.
It was going to be a long afternoon.
FOUR
“Lila, I need you to concentrate,” said Eve.
Lila jumped guiltily. She had been watching the café doors, waiting for Tim and Alex to arrive. They were late. “Sorry,” she said.
“Anyone would think you’re nervous about something,” said Josh in amusement.
“You know perfectly well I’m nervous about you meeting my brothers,” Lila said fretfully.
She loved Tim and Alex, but she knew how much they were going to tease her now they were going to meet her famous boyfriend at last. The last thing she needed was for those two idiots to scare away the best thing in her life.
“I’m sure we’ll weather it,” said Josh, and he kissed her.
Lila pushed him away. “Not here!” The thought of her brothers walking in and seeing her kissing … it was too embarrassing to think about.
“As I was saying,” Eve said pointedly. She fluttered a list under Lila’s nose. “In the absence of your brothers, we need to make a few decisions. So here we go. Beer or wine?”
“Both,” said Lila.
Eve nodded and put a brisk tick on her list. “Canapés. We have savoury tomato, goat’s cheese and pesto tartlets, chilli prawns, teriyaki chicken skewers, mushroom bruschetta, mini blinis and of course honey and mustard sausages. And loads of soft drinks, beer and wine. Has everyone replied?”
Lila looked at her own list. It was scruffier than Eve’s, with lots of scribbles and crossings out. She wasn’t very good at organizing things. Something else I’d better not make a career of, she thought gloomily. “Thirty-five definites, three maybes,” she said out loud.
Eve looked at her. “Lila, you only invited twenty-seven people.”
“Tim and Alex added some more at the weekend.”
Eve made extra notes in the margins. She was so cool, Lila thought, lost in admiration for her stylish, unflappable friend. She’d make a much better host at the party than Lila would.
“Are you sure you won’t come to the party, Eve?” she asked without thinking. “I could use your help on the night.”
Eve shut her notebook. “I’m organizing this party as a favour to you,” she said a little sharply. “Don’t ask me for anything more than that.”
Eve still hadn’t forgiven Lila’s father for arresting her dad, that much was clear. Lila and Eve had rebuilt their friendship after that particular scandal, but their fathers were still a subject best not discussed. Lila kicked herself for not thinking that particular question through.
“Sorry,” she said quickly. “Of course. I was just saying … you’d be very welcome.”
She jumped as the café door swung open again. Tim and Alex, she thought. Finally. But it was only Polly and Rhi, talking and laughing. Their appearance broke the awkward silence that had descended.
“Come on then,” said Polly as Rhi fetched some drinks. “Let’s see the memories.”
Lila had emailed everyone on the party list asking them for memories of her parents. Polly had promised to help Lila put them all into a beautiful book, with Rhi’s help as well. Lila had received some amazing things: old party invitations, photographs, concert tickets, postcards. Fumbling in her bag, she laid everything on the table. Her friends pounced.
“Oh my gosh, this so funny!” Polly giggled over a wedding photo. “Your dad is wearing a bow tie! And look at the frills on your mum’s wedding dress!”
They all pored over the pictures and stories. Tales of someone pushing Lila’s dad into a swimming pool, and her mother losing a shoe at university that had ended up on top of a bus shelter. Nearly all of the pictures showed Lila’s mother in hilarious eighties outfits and hair.
“Look at your mother’s perm!” Eve said in horror, peering at the pictures.
“Mum swears it was fashionable in her time,” Lila grinned. “Josh is going to do some caricatures of Mum and Dad to include in the book as well. What do you think?”
“It’s going to be gorgeous and your parents will love it,” Polly promised. “Leave it to me and Rhi.”
Lila made a triumphant tick on her scruffy to-do list. Here at least she’d managed to do something right.
They fetched more drinks. It was lovely sitting here with all her friends,
Lila thought, talking and laughing and squabbling as only friends could. Eve, witty and dry and full of gossip. Josh full of enthusiasm for his illustration course, showing the others some of the work he’d been doing in his sketchbook. When Tim and Alex come, it’ll be just as Josh says, she assured herself. We’ll be fine.
“So,” said Eve, leaning back in her chair, “who has summer plans? Rhi?”
“Only what you already know. Singing with Brody,” said Rhi, smiling. “Mainly around Heartside Bay, but we have a few gigs further down the coast in August.”
“Lila?”
“Just hanging out, really,” Lila said, feeling a little lame. “Going with the flow.”
“I have a plan,” said Polly, stirring her frappé.
“Making your first million in the market?” said Eve.
Polly’s eyes gleamed. “Better than that. Ollie and I are going to America!”
Everyone gasped. Lila felt a jolt of envy. America? She’d always wanted to go there.
“Wow!” Rhi cried. “You sneaky thing, you never said!”
“I didn’t know if I’d have enough money for the plane tickets,” said Polly. “But the stall’s been going so well, I’ve got enough for both me and Ollie to fly out to California. We’re going to visit my dad on his farm out there.”
“Oh my gosh, that’s amazing!” Rhi gushed.
“That’s brilliant, Polly,” said Josh admiringly.
“You have to go to Newport Beach, darling,” said Eve, leaning forward. “So glamorous. I’ll give you a list of restaurants.”
Lila felt a searing stab of envy. Polly was going to America, while all she had to look forward to was boring old Heartside Bay. She sat silently in her chair, her good mood evaporating, as the others discussed all the things Polly and Ollie would be able to do on their holiday. She knew she should be glad for her friends, but it wasn’t fair. Why didn’t exciting things ever happen to her?
She gave herself a talking-to in the bathroom.