by Sandra Kitt
“Not recently,” she said coyly.
“Seriously. I’m glad Eva has you to turn to, Diane.”
Diane smiled at her father, silently thanking him for such a lovely gift.
“I’ll swap with you.”
Diane and her father both were surprised by Hale’s sudden appearance. He was partnering Eva. Diane watched as Adam gladly released her to take his wife in his arms, smiling down at her with love.
“Finally,” he said as they danced away, disappearing into the other couples on the floor.
Diane gazed up at Hale as he took her in his arms. They had only danced together once since arriving at the party, and he’d been sure to get her for the slow number. He was smiling down at her and it struck her that he seemed the most relaxed and happy she’d ever seen him. Whatever her feelings may have been about Hale in the past, she had to accept that her parents considered him part of their family. They had known him almost half of his life. And there was no denying that there had been a big shift in her own feelings recently. Spending the holidays with him had been…
“You okay?” he asked, scanning her expression.
Diane forced herself to smile. “Hmm.”
“Ten more minutes.”
She blinked, trying to stay focused. “And then what?”
“Hello?” he chuckled. “What planet did you just land from? Ten minutes and we’re into a new year. Any resolutions?” he asked.
“No, I…I really haven’t given it any thought,” Diane murmured.
“I have,” he said, his voice low and intimate. He held her a little tighter. “My resolution is to not look back on the past anymore. I can’t change any of it. So, I’m focusing on the future.”
“Can you be more specific?” she asked.
He seemed to be thinking about his answer. He finally shook his head, even though he also regarded her with a steady, warm gaze.
“Not yet.”
The music suddenly stopped and there was a smattering of applause throughout the open terrace. Hale took her hand as they watched the final preparations for ringing in the new year.
Diane craned her neck to try and locate her family. Her father’s height made him easy to spot, and she knew that Eva would be right next to him. She found Simon, Katie and Hayden, and finally Bailey and Courtney in the company of two young men. She had to remind herself that at sixteen they weren’t doing anything she hadn’t done at their age. Hopefully not everything, she thought, thinking of Hale.
Red, royal blue and purple party hats with the new year printed in silver or gold around the rim were stacked on tables for the guests to take. Noisemakers were being passed out by waitstaff carrying around large baskets. Champagne bottles were uncorked and poured glasses were set. A flat-screen TV had been temporarily brought in from the lounge and tuned to a station for the countdown in New York’s Times Square.
“One minute to go!” the bandleader shouted, and everyone cheered again.
Hale stepped away briefly and grabbed glasses of champagne for them. Just for a moment as she stood by herself, Diane recalled the last two New Years Eve she’d spent alone by choice. The memory of Trevor walking out during the holiday still too prominent and painful for her to even think about celebrating. But she hadn’t thought of that more than once or twice since arriving on the island. Not at all since she and Hale had…
“Remember, this is about letting go of the past.”
Hale pressed a glass into her hand and they turned to listen to the countdown.
“Eight…seven…six…”
You make it sound so easy, Diane thought, but she couldn’t ignore something her father and Eva, and even Hale himself, had said that was starting to really trouble her.
“Three…two…Onnneeeeeee!”
Diane looked at Hale, and her heart did an unexpected flip-flop. It took her completely by surprise.
What was that?
Suddenly, from above, there was a sudden rain of colorful confetti and the waitstaff was throwing out streamers.
Hale put an arm around her and bent to kiss her. Her response was a little tentative and she knew it. When Hale pulled back Diane could see in his eyes that he felt it, too.
“Happy New Year,” he said, watching her closely.
“You, too….”
Someone threw their arms around her neck, startling her.
“Happy New Year,” Bailey said with great exuberance.
She was immediately followed by Hayden and Courtney and Eva and her father. A glance over her shoulder showed that Hale was getting similar treatment.
Diane felt herself enveloped in a bear hug.
“Well, we survived another year,” Adam said over the noise.
“Yeah, we did. Daddy, you said that Hale used to work for a drug company.”
He sighed, impatient. “Diane, give it a rest. What does it matter?”
She stared at him, waiting. He gave in.
“That’s right, he did. Why?”
“Who does he work for now?”
Adam frowned. “You shouldn’t have to ask me that, Diane.”
“I know, but…please tell me.”
Diane was aware that her father looked like he’d rather fall on a bed of nails than answer, but then he seemed to quickly get over his hesitancy.
“He still works for Carlyle. He’s a lobbyist on the Hill for them.”
Chapter 9
He wasn’t fooled for a minute.
Hale could see that Diane was doing her best to appear as if nothing was wrong. But her body language, her refusal to meet his gaze, told a different story.
She’d fixed a placid and pleasant smile to her face all during the goodbyes with her family on the dock at Cruz Bay. They were staying for one more day to avoid the postholiday crowds of people returning home. He, Simon and Diane were headed back to the airport on St. Thomas to catch flights. He wasn’t sure if anyone else noticed that Diane was distracted and distant. Particularly with him. Only Adam, shaking his hand and squeezing his shoulder murmuring, “Good luck,” hinted at his awareness of Diane’s sudden swift change of attitude.
For the life of him, Hale couldn’t put his finger on anything specific that might have caused Diane to close down. Already he was sensing that, for whatever reason, they were back to first base. That the gains he and Diane had made together over the holiday were about to vanish into thin air.
The ferry was filled with people and luggage. She was seated very close to him, her shoulder and side pressed against him as people squeezed in on all sides for the twenty-minute ride. But she was not relaxed. And even as he stretched out an arm behind her along the top of the seat, he felt Diane was only pretending to be at ease.
“Hey, are you ever in the Boston area?”
Hale drew in a deep breath of frustration and gave Simon his attention.
“Never been to Boston.”
“You have to come sometime. Be my guest. Me and Diane were raised just outside the city. Actually, just me. Diane’s been raised all up and down the East Coast.” Simon chuckled.
Hale glanced at her for her reaction, but she didn’t appear to have even heard her brother’s comment. He knew that after her father and mother divorced, both parents had remarried and started new families. He understood how she might have felt, being the only child having to shuttle back and forth growing up. That fact made it doubly annoying that she’d never understood his sense of displacement, of not having a place where he totally belonged.
“Thanks. I might just take you up on that.”
“Listen, I can sometimes score tickets for the home games. I don’t guess you’re a Patriots or Celtics fan?”
“Man, I’m from D.C. If my team is playing your team, that could be worth a trip.”
“Bet,” Simon grinned, and they exchanged a knuckle bump.
“What about you, Diane? Diane?”
Hale lightly tapped her shoulder to get her attention. She jumped.
“What? Sorry, I didn’t
hear you,” she said.
She looked, puzzled, between him and Simon, not even sure who had spoken. He watched her expression, picking up on the tightly drawn mouth, the slight furrow between her brows. Even the way she sat with her arms and legs crossed.
She had completely shut him out.
“I said, when are you coming up to Boston? Mom’s going to ask.”
She adjusted her sunglasses, moistened her lips. “I don’t know. I have a lot on my agenda this month. Probably for her birthday in February.”
“Call and let her know,” Simon suggested. “I’m not delivering any messages.”
Diane sighed and turned away impatiently. “Fine,” she said shortly.
Hale exchanged exasperated looks with Simon.
There was the usual slow march through the check-in process at the airport, which also required clearing customs before passing through security. Given how the previous evening had ended, and the uncertain start to the first day of the year, Hale was glad that Simon was lively and filled with interesting observations and comments.
Despite Diane’s assessment of Simon as the Golden Child who could do no wrong, at least where their mother was concerned, Hale liked him a lot. While it was clear to him that they didn’t have a lot in common, Hale had no trouble with seeing the two of them as friends. So he was relieved that Simon, probably unknowingly, filled in the awkward gaps and silences left by Diane’s failure to engage.
But the truth be known, Hale was anxious to talk with her. To find out what the problem was. Had she received news about a patient in D.C.? Was she just tired from a holiday of nonstop activities…including a deeply gratifying series of time together when they made love? Did it have to do with her father and Eva? Or was it all about him?
They announced Simon’s flight to Boston, and Hale was glad that Diane could rouse herself sufficiently to say goodbye to her brother. They walked him to the gate, and they could see his plane boarding on the tarmac beyond the plate glass windows.
“Great to meet you, man,” Simon said, unexpectedly giving him a brief handshake and chest bump. “Don’t forget my offer. It’s real.”
“Thanks. I appreciate it.”
“Big Sis.” He grinned at Diane.
Diane blinked, as if realizing that he was really leaving. “I’m so glad you made it.” She and Simon hugged each other tightly with warmth and love.
“Me, too. Love you.”
With a cheerful wave he gave the attendant his boarding pass and walked through the open door to the waiting plane.
Hale watched Diane watching her brother leave. She stared after him a long time and he suspected she was thinking the same thing he was. Now it was just the two of them.
Finally, she turned to look him in the face. The first time she’d done so all day. He knew his gaze was filled with questions and surprise. Doubt.
She broke their gaze and simply walked away, back to the seating area near their gate.
“Okay, enough,” Hale said, standing in front of her, looking down at her aloof expression.
She stiffened and even people sitting nearby grew quiet at his hard tone.
“Talk to me,” Hale said, louder and firmer than he’d meant to. But he would do whatever was necessary to get a response from her.
She jumped up from her seat. “People are staring.”
“Let them. This could get worse. I could really give them something to talk about.”
Several people snickered nervously, many others were nervously silent but paying attention.
Her eyes narrowed, taking his threat to heart. Better. Now he had her attention.
“Let it go.”
“You’re kidding, right? You started this. You’ve been treating me like I eat dirt since last night. I want to know what I’ve done now to offend you.”
He didn’t realize how angry he’d become over the last twelve hours until that moment. People were moving, changing seats, getting out of the line of fire. He could detect several blue-shirted airport agents, standing in his peripheral vision, watching.
He could see he’d embarrassed her. Her eyes were stormy. He was momentarily taken with how beautiful Diane was in her anger. She got in his face, her voice low and tight.
“You work for a company that should be put out of business. They promote drugs that aren’t considered safe, and they sell drugs to people who don’t need them.”
Hale stared blankly at her. For a full minute he had no idea what she was talking about.
“I took away two different prescriptions from my stepmother made by your company that might have done real damage to her. I know that Carlyle is not considered an honest company. How can you actually work for them? Are they paying you so much money that it doesn’t matter to you?”
Her voice began to rise in her righteous indignation. He could hear the silence in the waiting area. The whole room was still and no one moved. Two of the agents were slowing walking their way. Raising his hand, he briefly signaled that there would be no need for them to intervene.
Hale tightened his jaw and clamped down on his teeth. If he answered right away he knew it would be a knee-jerk reaction. He’d be striking back to hurt her, how she was hurting him in ways she didn’t even realize. Or maybe she did. He wasn’t going to tell her off the way he might have when he was nineteen and she’d attacked him with equally uncalled for accusations. He wasn’t going to go back to the old ways.
If he wasn’t careful he’d lose everything.
“Diane, you don’t know squat about me or what I do. You never did. You never took the time to find out because you wanted to believe I was never going to be good enough. It’s unforgivable that you believe I would do anything to hurt Eva. She and Adam have been good to me. Maybe better than I deserved in the beginning, but they never lost faith in me and I’ve never let them down.”
“Why didn’t you tell me about Carlyle?”
“I don’t owe you an explanation about Carlyle,” he bit out, stabbing a finger at her. She flinched.
“Keep it down, sir, or I’ll have to ask you to leave the terminal.”
Hale took a deep breath. He glanced at the agents and nodded.
“Carlyle is…is despicable.”
“You’re right. They were. That’s why I quit working for them. Let’s get something else straight. Don’t blame me for mistakes made by doctors like you. It’s your responsibility to make sure your patients are getting the right medication, not lawyers like me! You expect me to believe you’ve never given a patient a sample drug to try that was given you by some pharma rep?”
Diane opened her mouth to retaliate, but froze. She seemed to be struggling to find words.
He wasn’t about to let up.
“What you’re trying to pin on me I don’t do to people I care about. People I’ve come to love,” Hale said, his voice low and firm with emphasis. She gazed at him, but quickly shifted her eyes away. “I owe your father my life. I owe Eva much more, because she was good to me and kind and sweet. Unlike you.”
“Maybe I just see things differently than Eva,” Diane said, the energy leaving her words.
It sounded like a weak strike.
“I hoped that would change but…” Hale sighed, suddenly tired and dispirited. He shook his head, pensive. “This Christmas was…more than I could ever have hoped for. Being on St. John with your whole family…feeling like I was part of it. It was real nice.” He looked long and hard at her. “Feeling like, maybe you and I…”
Her gaze shot back to his. Wide and questioning, waiting for him to continue. But he thought better of it. He wasn’t going to expose his belly and give her another opportunity to attack.
“Maybe I was wrong about Carlyle, but Daddy said you’re a lobbyist for a drug company. That’s not much better, is it?”
Closing his eyes warily, Hale shook his head and began to back away from her. He raised his arms in surrender.
“That’s it. I’m down for the count. You don’t know what’s
true, and I don’t feel like helping you figure it out. I’m not doing this anymore, Diane. You win.”
Hale turned, found his seat and picked up his computer case. Pulling out his boarding pass he walked to the ticket agent’s desk. He had no idea what Diane was doing but he had no intention of turning around to find out. He was afraid that he might go back on his own word.
Slowly, conversation was picking up again in the waiting area. It was as if everyone had simultaneously let out their breaths in relief that the unbelievable public scene they’d all witnessed was over.
The attendant was professional and cool, acting as if she and her colleagues had not heard every word of the showdown.
“Sorry about that,” Hale felt compelled to say.
“No problem, sir. How can I help you?”
“I need a big favor. I changed my seat assignment by phone two days ago, but I don’t think it’s a good idea that I’m next to the lady. Any chance you can help a brother out again and find me a new seat?”
She took his pass, giving him what Hale read as an understanding glance.
“I’m sure I can find something for you.”
Diane absently swept her fingers through her hair, doing more harm than good. She quietly bid good-night to colleagues she passed in the corridor as she headed toward her office. She shared the small space with another physician and when she entered the room she was relieved to see that he’d already left for the day. She was about to close herself in when someone on the other side pushed the door open again.
“Sorry…I thought you’d want to see this before you leave.”
The nurse held out a patient folder to her. Diane stared at it before taking it, already suspecting that it was a case that might require her to stay late at the clinic.
“What is it?”
“It’s about a boy named Que…Qua…”
“Oh, yes. Qa’Shawn Davis.” She took the folder. “Thanks. Anything unusual?”
“Not according to the echo or EKG.”
Diane began reading the machine records from both tests as she blindly made her way to her desk and sat down. After reviewing the reports twice she placed a call and sat back in her chair, her eyes momentarily closed. She felt bone-tired. She hadn’t slept well for weeks and it was beginning to take a toll. She was exhausted and tense and sad.