“You must also think of a name for your daughter. He wasn’t pleased to hear me refer to her as ‘the baby’.”
Lavinia pouted. “Oh, you choose a name, Alice. I really can’t be bothered with it. What use is another girl to me? She’s only trouble and expense. I’ve no doubt the summer diarrhea will carry her off anyway.”
It was too much! Her callous disregard nearly caused Alice to lose her temper altogether. Truly, Lavinia was just too much to bear. She had to grit her teeth.
“Perhaps we should ask Sir Edward to choose a name. If we can persuade him to be her godfather, her future will not be so precarious.”
Lavinia looked thoughtful. “Indeed. You have something there, Alice. He may even wish to adopt her!”
“Hardly, since he isn’t married, that we know of.”
But what did they know? Perhaps there was a new Lady Masterman and she was already on her way to The Priory. What a truly awful thought! Alice desperately hoped not. But why should he not be married? He would make a wonderful husband. She had no doubt of that.
Lavinia looked bleak again. “No, he’s not married. Scripps told me so. He soon will be, though. He’ll be snapped up. It’s quite something to be mistress of The Priory. Why cannot we live the way it was in the Bible, where the widow married seven brothers, one after the other?”
Despite the gravity of their situation Alice nearly burst out laughing. If the infamous widow in the bible was anything like Lavinia it was quite easy to see how all seven brothers had been driven to their graves. Sir Edward was more fortunate than he knew! He owed his future wellbeing to Lord Hardwicke’s marriage act. She hid her smile just in time.
“We must put it out of our heads, Lavinia. Such a thing would be against the law. Come on, give the baby her milk, then I’ll settle her for the night.”
“Not in this chamber! I absolutely forbid it. I’ll feed the wretched brat if I must, but she’ll not disturb my sleep again. I’ve still not recovered my strength. Take her to your room!”
Yes, she would definitely speak to Sir Edward about the wet nurse. Lavinia didn’t have a scrap of motherly love in her entire being. Wretched brat. How could she say such a thing?
By the time the heavy cradle was tugged and pulled into a corner of the dressing room, the bedchamber set to rights and the supper tray removed to the kitchen, little Angel had been given all the sustenance she was going to receive that night. Alice happily received her back into her arms and tended to her needs before settling in to a low chair to rock her to sleep. The feel of the tiny, downy head against her cheek filled her with a tender longing. What hope did she have of a family to call her own? She would never find a husband now.
As she sat in the dressing room, the big house slipping into the quiet of night all around her, she allowed her thoughts to wander. A house of her own with a husband by her side to share her joys and sorrows. If she had to marry someone like Sir Gregory, though, she would sooner die an old maid! No, her husband would be tall and lean. Another Sir Galahad, with eyes of the brightest blue and hair as dark as the sky outside her window. He would be a just and honorable man, not too proud to say sorry. He would look like—
Alice pulled herself up short. There was more to a husband than the way he looked. He needed to be a kind man, trustworthy and hard working, not given over to gambling and dissipation.
As she tucked Angel into her cradle and prepared for bed the image she’d banished crept unbidden back into her head. Delicious warmth drove the chill away. Yes, it was true. Her dream husband would look very much like Sir Edward Masterman.
Chapter Three
Promptly at nine o’clock the next morning Alice presented herself at the book room. She knocked, expecting a command to enter. Instead the door swung inward as Sir Edward himself opened it. He bowed her into the room with unlooked-for courtesy. As she waited for him to close the door and return to his desk she considered his appearance and austere manner. Dressed in his seagoing uniform, without the gold braid and lace of the dress coat he had worn for dinner, there were no distractions. It was somehow easier to see the man. Even at this early hour of the morning he looked strained. There were shadows under his eyes that hadn’t been there yesterday. Was he ill?
“Are you quite well this morning, Sir Edward? Perhaps you didn’t sleep properly. Is your bedchamber not to your liking? I can ask Cora—”
“Don’t concern yourself with me, Miss Carstairs,” the captain interrupted. “I’m quite well, thank you. I’m just not yet used to a bed that doesn’t rise and fall with the tide, or to the solitude of a night without the sound of a watch-keeper’s bells.”
He could have had no rest at all, if he had been summoned directly from his duties. She felt an immediate sympathy. “You’ve come straight from your vessel? I hope you weren’t inconvenienced too badly. We, back on land, expect so much from our fighting men, don’t we, never thinking that they are flesh and blood like us. Don’t—”
“My duty is concluded, thank you.” Again he had broken into her speech, but this time the expression on his face had changed. Alice received a distinct impression that his emotions threatened to overcome his restraint. He proceeded after inhaling deeply.
“With Bonaparte safely on Elba the Admiralty has seen fit to lay up my frigate. I doubt Seabird will sail again. No, more than that. I’m certain she will never sail again.” His eyes gazed into the distance for a few moments. Remembering past battles, perhaps, or good men lost. After a very few seconds he shook his head and smiled briefly.
“I beg your pardon, Miss Carstairs. You have no interest in my affairs. Will you please sit down? I must remember I’ve other duties now. There’s much to discuss.”
So, she was permitted to sit. The captain didn’t quite regard her as one of the servants. Alice felt a small glow of warmth as she took the indicated seat and faced him across the desk.
He came straight to the point. “What is it that you most need? I’m led to believe from my communications with Mr. Scripps that the affairs of the estate are very precarious, but I do have some funds of my own to call upon to tide us over.”
She let out a long breath, realizing only then how nervous she’d been about this interview. He meant to help.
“It’s been that bad, then?”
Startled, she looked into his eyes. Had her expression revealed so much? He must be perceptive. She felt a warm flush of embarrassment steal across her face. What else had he noticed?
Honesty was needed now. “Yes, sir, it has been bad. Since Sir Gregory’s death matters have become desperate. We are not permitted credit with any of the merchants in the village nor in Winchester either. The manner of his passing has made it impossible for Lady Masterman to seek help from her neighbors. The scandal was hushed up, but it’s common knowledge and she doesn’t feel able to face anyone.
“Scandal? What scandal? Gregory died in a hunting accident, didn’t he?”
He didn’t know. She felt the blood flow out of her head as the realization sank in. It wasn’t her place to tell him, but there was no one else. Scripps was too far away, in Winchester.
“No, Sir Edward. I regret to have to tell you that your brother…your brother shot himself. He blew his brains out when he lost the London house at cards. I…we found him behind the stable with his shotgun.”
She had to pause. The sight of the blood and the sickly smell of the gunpowder still gave her nightmares. The memory of what was left of his face haunted her.
She hadn’t noticed him move, but suddenly she felt a glass in her hand and his warm fingers closing her own numb ones around it.
“Take a sip of this. You need it.”
There was no brandy in the house, so she complied. It wasn’t water, though, it was the last of the sherry. She shuddered and pushed it aside. If she didn’t tell him the story now, she never would.
“Barlow and I dragged him over to the fence near the home farm. It wasn’t far, but he was a heavy man. We tried to make it look like h
e’d caught himself in the hawthorn bush. The doctor knew, but he said nothing. I think it must have been his valet who spread the gossip. We couldn’t let him be buried at the crossroads so…so I lied to the vicar. I swore it was an accident.”
She risked a glance. He’d returned to his seat behind the desk. His face showed no discernible emotion. What was he thinking? About his brother, or about her. She found her courage and continued.
“All of the able-bodied servants have sought work elsewhere or been dismissed. Mr. Scripps felt unable to continue Lady Masterman’s allowance. He had no instructions. We are more nearly paupers than you can imagine.”
He looked at her. “And yet you’ve remained here. Why is that?”
Did he need to ask such a question? What a poor creature he must think her. “I couldn’t desert the family when they needed help. Lavinia, Lady Masterman I should say, is my cousin. Her mother was my father’s younger sister. She offered me a position when my circumstances compelled me to seek employment. I should be disloyal indeed to leave her now. Who would have cared for Penelope, or for the baby?”
He considered her expression for a few moments, but his answer was non-committal. “I see. Thank you for telling me all this. It explains a great deal.” He paused to pick up a pen. “So, we need to make a list. I require a cook, a footman and a house maid and perhaps some outdoor staff?”
Alice disagreed. “What we require most urgently is a wet nurse, if you’d be so good. I can manage the rest by myself.”
The captain shook his head. “No, you cannot manage the rest, Miss Carstairs. I won’t permit you to do so. I would be greatly indebted to you if you’ll interview household staff for me, as I’ve no experience in such matters, but we’ll most definitely require a cook at the very least! Also I wish to have a footman, a groom, another housemaid and, of course, your wet nurse. I’m sure we can find a maid and footman locally, but I think we’ll need to go to Winchester to engage a decent cook. Is there a carriage in the stables, or must we walk into the village to hire one?”
He surely couldn’t have so very much money of his own, if he had been living on his pay since Trafalgar, more than ten years past. How could he afford so many staff?
“Indeed, Sir Edward, the expense would be very great. If you employed a cook, a wet nurse and another housemaid we could manage. Maids are much less expensive than a manservant.”
She saw that tightening of his mouth, the thinning of his lips. She’d done it again.
“I’ll worry about my financial affairs, Miss Carstairs. I can’t possibly allow Barlow to struggle on the way he is now. I’ve explained my wishes to you and now I’m still waiting for you to answer my question.”
She had stepped over the line, hadn’t she? After all this time and all the carping reminders from Lavinia, she persisted in thinking herself an equal. Would she never learn?
She swallowed her chagrin as best she could. “I beg your pardon, Sir Edward. We have an elderly gig and an even more elderly gelding that no one offered to buy when the stables were put up for sale. If you wish me to accompany you to Winchester I need to make arrangements for Penelope and also the baby.” She paused for a few moments, considering.
“There is one other thing.”
“Yes?”
“Lady Masterman felt that you might like to give the baby a name, as she wishes you to consent to be her godfather.”
He smiled, but it wasn’t a particularly pleasant smile.
“Lady Masterman wishes, does she? Well, the phantom may ask me herself about being godfather. If I ever get to meet the woman. Perhaps you can suggest to her she name the baby Gabrielle.”
Alice looked at him, much struck by his instant choice. Gabrielle. An angel’s name. Was it deliberate? She would have to find out.
“Or perhaps you’ve considered Raphaela?”
He frowned. “No and before you suggest it, not Michaela either.”
He had a quick mind, this sea captain. She knew when she was beaten, but still her heart warmed toward him.
“Gabrielle. I think that’s a beautiful name. I’ll tell her. I mean, I’ll suggest it.”
He crossed to open the door for her.
“No, Miss Carstairs, you were right the first time. You will tell her. I’ll meet you at the stables in thirty minutes.”
Lavinia heard no more than Alice’s news about the wet nurse.
“Let him call her whatever he pleases, my dear Alice. I’ve decided to attempt to lie on the chaise-longue today. Now that I’m to regain my freedom I must make the effort.”
Thank heavens Lavinia had finally given up moping around in the bed! Alice left her feeding Gabrielle, with Cora running backward and forward fetching this gown and that for her inspection.
To her surprise when she reached the stables Barlow was there, assisting Sir Edward with the gelding’s harness. She saw at once that the bit was fastened too tightly and the collar not quite comfortable on his scrawny neck. As surreptitiously as she could she remedied the faults. At last they were ready and the captain came round to hand her up into the gig.
“Would you care to take the reins, Miss Carstairs? I’m still unfamiliar with the directions to the village.”
Was this a test? It was a strange request, as really there was only one road that could be taken from The Priory, but perhaps he wished to look about him. Alice willingly took charge of Gladiator and soon they were making their stately way down the drive.
Aware of the captain’s scrutiny, she became uncomfortable. What was amiss? In the close confines of the little gig his presence disturbed her. He was so tall and so powerful. He smelled of clean soap and sea air. Only an inch or so separated her from his breeches-clad thigh and his elbow brushed against hers now and again as the gig swayed on the badly kept driveway. She could feel heat emanating from him.
“Is there something wrong, sir?” she asked after a few minutes. “Would you perhaps care to take the reins?”
He laughed. “I would if I knew how.”
Surely she couldn’t have heard correctly? She pulled Gladiator to a stop to give him her full attention. “I…I beg your pardon, Sir Edward?”
His voice sounded rueful. “You heard me, Miss Carstairs. I’ve hardly set foot on land since I was twelve years old. I’ve never learned to drive a horse and carriage. I can ride, after a fashion, but that’s all.”
Not to be able to drive! It was quite amazing. Alice could scarcely believe it, but on second thoughts it was all too possible. She already knew of his neglect as a child and a naval officer would have little opportunity or indeed the necessity of learning.
A strange emotion gripped her. Not pity. No, it wasn’t that. More a sense of anger and of compassion. How could Sir Edward go about his daily activities if he couldn’t drive?
“Well, sir, you’re about to have your first lesson. I hardly think Gladiator will run away with you.”
He laughed again, more pleasantly this time, as if he was genuinely amused, breaking the tension. “Is that his name? Singularly inappropriate, I would have thought.”
“Not at all,” she disagreed in a prim voice. “Fifteen or twenty years ago, when he was in his prime, I’ve no doubt the name would have suited him admirably.”
The captain proved an apt pupil, rarely having to be told anything twice and Alice soon relaxed. She watched him discreetly. He’d made his admission without any attempts to fob her off with falsehoods and accepted her tuition as a matter of course. His brother would never have submitted to being told anything by a woman. But then, who else was there? They had no groom and Barlow had probably never learned to drive either. They had made a pretty botch between them of harnessing Gladiator.
He was such an honest, straightforward man, she decided, liking him a little more each time she came into contact with him.
Sir Edward broke into her thoughts. “We must have another horse. I feel guilty at making this poor fellow drag me around. He has surely earned his retirement. How do we set
about buying one?”
To be buying a horse, as well as all the rest! Alice started to object, but held herself back. He’d not asked for her opinion.
“There’s a horse fair at Easter, but that’s still some way off. Perhaps it would be best to speak to Mr. Reid, your tenant at Three Oaks farm. He’s a good man and inclined to help us. He bought a cartload of turnips from me he really didn’t need. I think you’ll like him. He can perhaps rent you a horse for a while.”
“I’ll add it to my list. Have we many more turnips? I don’t look forward to eating them at every meal.”
Alice smiled. “You’ll be in complete agreement with Penelope. I must own that I don’t care for them overmuch myself, but they were in part payment of rent from another of your tenants. Mr. Scripps could not be bothered with them, luckily for us. They have seen us through the winter.”
He looked straight at her, appalled. “Don’t tell me you’ve lived on turnips.”
She didn’t want him pitying her. She tried to keep her voice light. “Well, yes, among other things. We managed.”
He fell silent for a while. She risked a quick glance and saw a simmering anger. No, more than that. Sir Edward looked both furious and horrified.
“Gregory has more to answer for than I first thought. What a blackguard he must have been. But it’s no use repining. And now, as we are approaching the village I’ll relinquish the reins to you. My confidence in my ability is not that great as yet.”
Once through the village and on their way to Winchester Sir Edward retrieved control of Gladiator and concentrated on his driving. The conversation lagged, but Alice found herself enjoying the outing immensely. The sun had driven away the overnight frost. To be in the fresh air, brisk though it was and with the worst of her anxieties forgotten, was almost like a holiday. There was no one else upon the roads at this time of day, but here and there the signs of spring gladdened her heart with bursts of color. Celandines on a sheltered bank glowed yellow in the sunshine and there were snowdrops to be seen in the gardens they passed, together with an occasional early priMr.ose. Alder catkins bathed the trees next to a horsepond and the black buds of ash trees added a stark contrast.
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