Indigo Knights: The Boxed Set

by Jet Mykles

  Chapter Fifteen

  Present, January

  If the album hadn’t convinced Lance that he’d absolutely made the right decision signing on with the Indigo Knights, their first few gigs at Jefferson Douglas cemented the fact. In all his years working for Shelby and The Might, in all the failed bands he’d been in before that, he’d never had this much fun onstage.

  Danny and Rabin were dynamic performers, true performers who not only paid attention to the music but attention to the audience. Danny was ridiculously smooth, flirting and coaxing the audience to fly with them. Rabin was alternately focused and freewheeling but never missed a beat or a chord. Lance could tell Noble was enjoying himself too, playing it up under the spotlight that gleamed off his purple mohawk. Lance didn’t normally move much during a performance, preferring to remain beside his amps, maybe singing a chorus or two. But being onstage with these guys was infectious. He found himself venturing toward the lip of the stage, playing it up for the girls—and boys—who watched them with shining eyes and huge smiles. It was the best high he’d ever had, and they’d only just begun.

  After taking their bows, they rushed backstage in a cluster of hugs and congratulations. Tonight, Fiona and Rusty, their roadies, were not alone in the greenroom. Izzy, Brent, and Hell were also there. As was Gordon, who threw himself into the general hug as soon as the band showed. Lance was so excited that he didn’t realize Gordon was near him until they were face-to-face. There was a moment’s hesitation before Gordon grinned big and grabbed him for a bear hug. Lance was too shocked to do anything but hug back, and once he was touching, heat coursed through his veins.

  “Now that,” Gordon murmured in his ear, maybe too low for anyone else to hear, “is a fucking band.” He gave Lance another mighty squeeze before grabbing his shoulders to hold him at arm’s length. “Do you hear me?” he demanded, shaking Lance. “That’s what you were meant to do.”

  Lance could only stare in delighted amazement at the joyous conviction that shone on Gordon’s face. Joy and pride. Yes, pride. In the band. In him. Gordon was proud of him. He felt light-headed.

  Gordon drew him back to lay a quick kiss on his cheek before releasing him to turn and hug someone else. Lance couldn’t help staring at his back, stunned by what had just happened.

  Noble caught him up in a hug and laughed in his other ear. “Well, that was interesting.” He drew back and winked, then turned away.

  Noble’s hug did the trick in letting Lance regain his composure. He followed Noble to the table, where Fiona was pouring champagne into big red cups. Lance hated champagne, but he drank anyway in celebration.

  “To the Knights,” Brent yelled, raising his cup as they all settled down for him. “May tonight be the first of many triumphs.”

  There was a resounding chorus of “hear, hear” and a lot of drinking. The tiny room was stuffed with people, hardly any place to move, so it was easy for Lance to find himself close to Gordon again. Pathetic, yes, to just want to be near him, but in a crowd he could get away with it with no one the wiser.

  And it allowed him to hear astounding things.

  “Where’s Leon?” Rabin asked Gordon, his arm around Izzy’s shoulders.

  “He’s gone,” Gordon blurted without missing a beat. He probably didn’t see Lance behind him.

  “Gone gone?” Izzy asked.

  “Yeah. We called it quits.”

  Lance quickly turned his back so none of them could see his face, even though he knew they weren’t paying him any attention. They broke up?

  “I’m sorry.” Izzy again.

  “Don’t be. When I told him what my schedule’s probably going to be like for the next year, he freaked out.” Gordon laughed. He laughed. “He couldn’t understand that I’d be out of town for the foreseeable future.”

  Lance digested that. He’d heard it before. It was often hard for someone who wasn’t in the business to be in a relationship with a musician. The schedule often sucked, and the rewards usually meant more to the musician than to his significant other. Leon’s gone. He remained where he was when Gordon’s phone rang and he left to answer it. Lance had heard what was important. Not that it meant anything to him personally. It wasn’t like Gordon was going to jump back into his bed. But with Leon gone, that meant there was a better chance…

  No. He downed his champagne with a grimace, then went to change out of his sweaty shirt. Time to head out for a real drink. The others seemed to have the same idea. Noble was already gone, as were Brent and Hell. Danny was lingering, but that was probably because he was thinking about the roommate he’d recently started to sleep with. Rabin and Izzy were kissing in the corner. Love. He was surrounded by love in various shapes and forms. It was a new experience.

  An experience he kind of liked.

  * * * *

  Lance caught up to Gordon the next night. “I’m sorry to hear about Leon.” He’d debated even saying anything, but after a night of mulling it over, tonight he’d decided he didn’t have anything to lose.

  Gordon looked up. He sat at one of the empty booths, engaged with his smartphone as the band completed their sound check. The club’s doors would open soon. The band wasn’t due to go on for another two hours. “How did you hear about Leon?”

  He sat across from Gordon. “I overheard you last night with Rabin and Izzy.”

  “Oh.” Gordon shrugged as he glanced down at the phone. “It is what it is.” The last sounded vaguely familiar. Oh yeah, in both words and inflection, it was what Lance might have said in the same situation.

  “You’re okay, then?”

  “Why wouldn’t I be?”

  Lance waited. “So…”

  Gordon didn’t look up. “No.”

  “No?”

  “We’re not getting back together.”

  He scowled at the top of Gordon’s head. “Doesn’t have to be that.” He spread his hands magnanimously. “It can just be meaningless sex.”

  Gordon snorted. When he tilted his face up, there was a little smile curling his lips. Lance took heart that he was taking this lightly and not storming off in a huff. “I thought you were off sex.”

  “No. Just off sex with other people.”

  Gordon took the bait. “Other people?”

  “You’re not just people.”

  He sighed, laying the phone facedown on the table with his hand covering it. “I said no.”

  “That was when you had a boyfriend.”

  “I still say no.”

  “Why? You know the sex was great between us.”

  He almost denied it. Lance saw him try. Then he grimaced. “Yes. It was.”

  “So? We could have that again.”

  “Sure.” Gordon’s smile was bitter, his tone cool. “That’s how it started last time.”

  Lance shrugged, trying not to get excited that Gordon was still talking. “It was good.”

  “Yeah. Until you decided I was smothering you.”

  “I never said that.”

  “No, you didn’t. You rarely said anything.”

  Lance heard the accusation loud and clear. Okay, so talking things out had never been his strong point. “Yeah. Well, now you know better.” And that, judging by the icy sheet that shut down Gordon’s expression, was the exact wrong thing to say.

  “Yeah.” Gordon swiped up his phone. “Now I know better.” He stood. “Not happening.” With that, he walked off.

  Lance stayed where he was, staring at the space Gordon had occupied. He couldn’t decide if that had gone well or not.

  * * * *

  “See?” Noble had to yell to be heard even though he was leaning close to Lance’s ear. “He doesn’t have a problem with moving on.”

  Lance didn’t respond, too busy watching Gordon come on to a good-looking blond in a tight sweater and tighter jeans. Seeing him with Leon had been bad enough, but this? He watched as their heads bent close, watched the blond pucker up and brush kisses along Gordon’s jaw. Watched Gordon’s hand splay acros
s the blond’s belly, fingers pointed down.

  “Fuck.”

  “Maybe you should go home,” Noble suggested, dancing in place beside him. Why he was sticking close to Lance was a mystery, but he’d been there since they’d come out front. By now he should be buried in the dance crowd. Or buried balls-deep in some kid in the bathroom.

  Not a bad idea, actually.

  Lance stood and leaned into Noble. “Find me someone.”

  Noble stilled.

  “Find me someone quick and dirty.”

  For that he got wide eyes. “You sure?”

  “Yes.” Electricity ratcheted inside his chest as he struggled to turn off his brain before rational thought returned. “Quick. Before I change my mind.”

  Noble pressed his half-finished drink into Lance’s hands and disappeared into the crowd. With anyone else, Lance might have felt weird about the request, but Noble thrilled at hooking people up, whether for short- or long-term. He was a matchmaking genius when given his head.

  Lance downed the rest of Noble’s drink, grimacing at the taste of watered-down vodka. He sat on the bar stool behind him and glared at Gordon, who was now kissing the blond. Kissing! Fuck. Shouldn’t he be schmoozing the crowd on behalf of the Knights? Wasn’t Lance justified in being pissed that he wasn’t working? His mood got worse when the blond took Gordon’s hand and led him away, toward the club’s front door. Lance watched them leave.

  He’d worked up a full head of mad by the time an attractive brunet sidled up in front of him. Wicked knowledge shone in deep brown eyes, and a tongue piercing flashed in his open smile.

  “Hi.” He stepped between Lance’s thighs and rested his forearms on Lance’s shoulders. “Noble sent me.”

  Lance nodded, wrapping an arm around the man’s slim waist to bring them flush. They shared a kiss that was all lust and no finesse. “Quick and dirty.”

  The brunet’s pierced eyebrow rose. “Men’s room?”

  “Works for me.”

  Now it was Lance being taken by the hand to be led toward the rear of the club. He didn’t look around, concentrated instead on the back of this guy’s neck. A nice neck, really. He’d have to bite it.

  The men’s room wasn’t communal. No stalls, just one toilet, one door, one lock. It stank of urine laced over with fruity air freshener.

  A condom machine was attached to the wall. Lance slapped it. “Do I need to get some change?”

  The guy glanced at it, then grinned. “No.” He pulled a wallet out of his pocket and extracted a shiny packet. “Got one.”

  “Good.” Lance snatched the condom with one hand and used the other to wrap around the guy’s waist to pull him into a kiss.

  Bless him, Noble’s choice understood what Lance needed. Lance didn’t have to think too much because the guy had their dicks out in record time, squeezing them together. “You topping?” he asked Lance between tongue swipes.

  “Yeah.”

  Hungry kissing as Lance tore the condom open. He managed to roll the latex on without losing contact. Once it was on, the guy pulled back, turned around, and dropped his pants. They were too tight to go far, but the waistband made it to his thighs, which was plenty to expose his naked bubble butt. Lance slapped it once, aimed, then pushed in. The guy’s groan assured him he hadn’t caused unwelcome pain.

  “Shit.” It’d been too long. “Not gonna last.”

  The guy chuckled, far too calm. He reached back to hook a hand behind Lance’s neck. “Go for it.”

  With a horribly weak whimper, Lance did just that. His hips rolled into action, his fingers digging into the bones of the guy’s hips. He wasn’t sure it was more than two seconds before he was shooting his load.

  “Fuck.”

  “Wow.” The amused voice was still way too calm. “You were pent up.”

  Lance staggered back, caught short by the wall behind him. Eyes closed, he rested his skull on the cool tile and breathed. “Yeah. I…” This was embarrassing. “Give me a minute.”

  “No worries.” When water sounded, Lance cracked his eyes open to see the guy washing his hands. His pants were already up. “Noble said it’d be fast.” He winked at Lance in the mirror. “I owed him one.”

  Yeah, this was really embarrassing. The guy wasn’t even into him. “Sorry.”

  “Hey.” He stepped up to Lance, the denim of his jeans pressing against Lance’s exposed cock, rough even through the latex. “You wanna go again?”

  “Uh…”

  “Didn’t think so.” Grinning, the guy kissed him, then stepped away. “See you around sometime.” He left.

  Lance had the presence of mind to lock the door behind him, but he had to take a moment to breathe once he was alone. Well, that was shit. Did he feel better? Not really. Could you even call that sex? Disgusted with himself, he disposed of the condom and washed up. He’d waited all this time for sex, just to give it up in two seconds in a men’s room? Hell, quick and dirty was what he’d asked for; quick and dirty was what he got. And he didn’t feel any better for it.

  Noble was at the end of the hall when Lance came out of the men’s room. The brunet guy was nowhere to be seen. “You okay?”

  “Sure.” He couldn’t meet his friend’s eyes. “Thanks.”

  “Hey.” Noble squeezed his shoulder. “You okay?”

  He didn’t respond to the question the second time. “I’m headed out. You good to get home?”

  “Lance?”

  “Not now.”

  Noble paused, then dropped his hand. “I’ll come with you.”

  “No. Stay here. Have fun.” He hesitated. “If you see that guy, tell him thanks.”

  Before Noble could respond, Lance beat a hasty retreat, face down so he didn’t have to see anyone. He’d taken the train to the club earlier, but now he flagged a cab. He couldn’t be around other people.

  Back home, he immediately took a shower, standing under the spray for longer than necessary. Where he was, he could convince himself that all the moisture on his face was from an external source and not the result of tears wrung from his pathetic heart. This was why he’d been celibate. He was a guy—he wasn’t supposed to get all emotional over sex. He didn’t used to get this emotional. But he must have too much estrogen in his system, because he could no longer separate sex and love. Not now that he’d known—and destroyed—love. Since he couldn’t seem to fall out of love with Gordon, he was stuck not liking sex with anyone else.

  * * * *

  He woke up with Noble in his bed. Couldn’t say they were cuddling, but they were close enough he could smell Noble’s mild morning breath. Noble must have taken a shower; the product was all gone from his hair, leaving him with a fan of vivid purple draped over the shaved side of his head.

  Noble woke when Lance stirred, hazel eyes clear of colored lenses. “Mornin’.”

  “What are you doing here?”

  Noble reached up to stretch, yawning big. The sheet fell back enough to reveal his toad tattoo, which meant he was at least shirtless. “Had to make sure you were okay.”

  “When’d you get here?”

  “You were asleep.” Noble snuggled back down into the pillow and closed his eyes. “Around three or so.”

  “I’m fine.”

  Without opening his eyes, Noble flashed him a middle-finger salute. “Yeah. You were great when you ran out of the club last night.”

  Sighing, Lance rolled onto his back to regard the ceiling. “That was a mistake. I’m sorry.”

  “What? The running or the quickie?”

  “The quickie. I should’ve just left.”

  “Hey, I get it. I saw Gordon take off with that guy.”

  The reminder was like a knife to his heart. Were they waking up together? Were they fucking? Damn it.

  As though he felt it too, Noble reached over to lay a warm hand on Lance’s chest. “I’ll find you someone for more’n just a quickie tonight.”

  “No.” To show he appreciated the effort, Lance grabbed up Noble’
s hand and brought the knuckles to his lips for a kiss.

  “You sure? I know just the guy. Name’s Jackson, and he’s like this adorable little teddy bear. Greatest hugs in the world.”

  “I appreciate it, but no. It was a mistake.”

  Noble sighed as Lance replaced his hand on his chest. “You’re going back to the celibacy thing?”

  “Yeah.”

  “That’s fucked-up.”

  “Yeah.”

  He listened to Noble sigh again and had a brief regret that the two of them hadn’t worked out as a couple. He and Noble knew each other inside and out. Which, of course, was why they knew it wouldn’t work. They’d drive each other insane, as they’d almost done way back when they’d given it a brief try.

  “Was it so bad?”

  “It’s not that. I just… It feels wrong.”

  Noble pinched him. “You’re such a girl.”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  Noble slid his hand down to Lance’s belly. “You want me to…?”

  Lance caught his wrist. “God, no. That wouldn’t solve anything.”

  “Hmm.” Pulling back his hand, Noble rose to his elbow. “And what will solve everything?”

  Lance stared at the ceiling some more. Maybe the answers were up there. “Going on tour. Playing music. Getting that to be my normal thing.” Yeah, he needed a routine again, even if that routine was the hectic life of a traveling musician. “My head’s screwed up. I just need to concentrate on the band.”

  Noble considered that. “Yeah. Okay.” He dropped into the pillows, apparently set to go back to sleep.

  Noble managed what Lance couldn’t. Instead he listened to his friend’s breathing smooth, took comfort in the closeness even if he couldn’t take comfort in other ways.

  The band. That’s what he’d focus on, what he’d pour all his frustration into. Work it into a positive rather than a sad state of life. After all, what else could he do?

  Chapter Sixteen

  Past, November

  “I’d love to sign The Might for one of our series.” Jason Moreno stood at the tall, narrow table across from Lance, his dark features made darker by the strobing lights that surrounded them. Gordon had introduced him as the man in charge of the big-name Boston club. Lance had already known his name. You couldn’t be in music in the Northeast and not have heard of Moreno.