by Sarah Morgan
‘Wait just a minute.’ Ellie reached into a drawer and handed her a slip of paper. ‘Secret Santa.’
‘What about it?’
‘Everyone has to buy a present for someone. Just £5. Chocolates. Bottle of wine. Joke book. Whatever, but if that’s my name on that piece of paper make sure it’s chocolates.’ Ellie grinned. ‘We’re going to put all the presents under the tree in the staffroom and have a grand opening. Which reminds me—are you going to the Christmas party? They need to know numbers by tomorrow.’
Stella hesitated. ‘I don’t know…’
‘You must go,’ Ellie urged, handing her another piece of paper. ‘It’s at the outdoor ice rink that they’ve set up by the lake. Little twinkly lights everywhere, Christmas carols and mulled wine. So romantic.’
Stella decided not to point out that she didn’t have anyone to be romantic with. ‘I’ll think about it.’ But that noncommittal remark wasn’t enough for Ellie.
‘Oh, please go. You’re a fantastic skater, I remember you taking a bunch of us a few years ago. If nothing else, you have an evening out, get some exercise and impress the men with your triple salco toe loops or whatever they’re called. We can have a lovely girly bonding session on the ice. There’s no chance I’ll catch Ben skating—you know what men are like. He’ll be at the bar with the guys. I need someone to peel me off the ice.’ Stella laughed. ‘I’ll think about it.’
‘And you’re sure you don’t mind working Christmas Day?’
Stella shrugged. ‘It’s fine.’ Given the option of working or sitting in the stable on her own, she was going to choose to work, even if working meant that she’d be shoulder to shoulder with Daniel. ‘Are you and Ben going away?’
‘No. Family Christmas at home, everyone welcome. Which basically means disorganised chaos. We’d love you to come over after you finish here. There’ll be loads to eat.’
Stella smiled, touched by Ellie’s generosity. ‘Thanks. But I’ll probably be so tired I’ll be glad to get home and be on my own.’
‘Stella, you can’t be on your own on Christmas Day! It’s a time to be with people! If you don’t sit there grinding your teeth, desperate to get away from everyone, it just doesn’t feel like Christmas! And what about turkey? Crackers? Presents? Silly hats? Too much champagne?’ Ellie sounded appalled and Stella managed a smile.
‘If that’s a description of your typical Christmas then I might come after all.’
‘I hope you do.’ Ellie gave Stella a quick hug and Stella felt a lump in her throat.
She had lovely friends, she reminded herself. People who cared about her.
Maybe she didn’t have a family of her own, but life wasn’t all about finding that one special person you wanted to be with.
But, for the first time ever, she wasn’t looking forward to Christmas.
Patrick’s arrival home was accompanied by a flurry of excitement and an even larger flurry of snow.
‘If I’d waited twenty-four hours I wouldn’t have had to struggle with that papier mâché snowman,’ Daniel observed as he sutured a laceration on a girl’s leg while Stella helped. ‘We could have made the real thing.’
‘You still can. And I’m willing to bet that papier mâché snowman will still be in Posy’s life in five years’ time.’ Stella gave the girl a tetanus injection. ‘I’m sure she’s missing you.’
‘Probably in the same way Alfie is missing all the toys that I managed to damage,’ Daniel drawled, tying off the final stitch and then applying a dressing. He smiled at the girl on the trolley. ‘That was a dramatic end to a Christmas party. How are you getting home?’
‘Is that an offer?’ Still tipsy, the girl looked at him flirtatiously and Daniel gave a faint smile.
‘It was a concerned question. I can see you’ve been drinking. Not a good end to the office party, spending an hour in here.’
‘Actually, it was a great improvement on the office party. For a start, you’re five times better looking than anyone I work with. And if I wasn’t here, I’d still be there, which would mean dodging my hideous boss who was dressed as Santa.’ The girl swung her legs over the side of the trolley and stood up shakily. ‘He was going “Ho, ho, ho” and pinching all the girls’ bottoms. That’s why I cut my leg. I dived to one side and slipped on someone’s abandoned sausage roll.’
Stella giggled. ‘Sounds like a great party.’
‘It’s one of those parties where you know if you don’t watch yourself, you’re going to end up losing your job.’ The girl looked down at herself gloomily. ‘This outfit is ruined. I wish I hadn’t drunk anything. I feel dizzy.’
Stella frowned, concerned. ‘Is there someone at home for you?’
‘My flatmate. I suppose I’d better call a taxi. I don’t want to lose my licence on top of everything else. Thanks for stitching me up, you delicious doc.’ She gave Daniel a sultry smile and scribbled her phone number on a scrap of paper. ‘Any time you want to play doctors and nurses—call me.’
Daniel lifted a hand and refused the paper that she was thrusting at him. ‘Thanks, but I don’t want to be struck off just yet.’
The girl gave a good-natured smile and stuffed the paper into her pocket. ‘Oh, well, you can’t blame me for trying.’ She slid her arms into her coat. ‘Have a good Christmas. Whenever I watch those medical soaps on TV, I think it always looks really exciting. There’s usually some sort of major accident or something, isn’t there? Drama, drama, drama. Someone held at gunpoint, or a train crash.’
‘That’s TV. They’re competing for viewers. In real life we’re hoping for a really uneventful Christmas,’ Stella said hastily, handing her an information sheet and urging her towards the door. ‘I want to eat mince pies, not spend the day sticking people back together.’
But she had a feeling that she was going to spend Christmas Day avoiding Daniel.
Since looking after Patrick’s children, everything seemed worse. Up until then Daniel had managed to convince her that he’d be a terrible father, but she knew now that it wasn’t the case. He’d be a wonderful father. The best.
That precious time they’d spent together had given her a tantalising glimpse of a future more perfect than anything in her dreams. And that glimpse had left her impossibly sad because Daniel still didn’t see it the way she did.
Chapter Nine
STELLA sat in the back of the taxi, having a moment of doubt.
She shouldn’t have come.
It was a Christmas party, for goodness’ sake, and she wasn’t very good company.
She frowned crossly. Who was she kidding? The reason she didn’t want to go was because Daniel was going to be there.
‘Are you going to sit there all night, love?’ The taxi driver was watching her in his rear-view mirror. ‘What’s wrong?’
‘Can you take me back home again?’ Stella slid down slightly in the seat, hoping that no one would see her. ‘I’ve changed my mind.’
The taxi driver looked at her thoughtfully. ‘Man trouble?’
‘Sort of.’ Stella didn’t want to admit that she was still in love with a man who had broken off their engagement two years previously. That made her nothing more than stupid, didn’t it?
‘Take some advice from me—if it’s a choice between sitting indoors feeling sorry for yourself or going out and meeting people, always go out.’ His voice was gruff. ‘I remember after my Lydia died, I didn’t want to go anywhere. Didn’t want to do anything. But my mates dragged me out all the time. And eventually I started to enjoy myself. And I met Beth. Life moves on, love. But it isn’t going to move on if you’re on your own on the sofa.’
Stella blinked. ‘Well, I—’
‘What’s the worst that’s going to happen? You’re going talk to a few people and be bored. Maybe you’ll slip on the ice and break something.’ He shrugged as if that was a matter of no consequence. ‘Either way, it’s got to be a step up from sitting on the sofa feeling sorry for yourself.’
Stella laughed. ‘
Breaking something is a step up from watching TV?’
‘You can’t be lonely in hospital, and you might meet a gorgeous doctor.’
Stella didn’t tell him that it was the prospect of meeting one gorgeous doctor in particular that was putting her off. ‘I’ll bear that in mind.’ She pulled her purse out of her bag and handed him a note. ‘Merry Christmas. And thanks for the advice.’
He was right, she thought to herself as she stepped out of the car onto the icy ground. A night spent alone in front of the television feeling sorry for herself was the coward’s way out. All right, so it was hard not being with Daniel. But life was hard. She needed to get a grip.
If her mother could manage a world cruise at her age, then she could manage a hospital Christmas party.
‘Stella!’ Ellie slithered over to her, her hand in Ben’s. ‘Isn’t it a perfect evening?’
Ben looked at his wife with incredulity, ‘El, it’s below freezing and it’s starting to snow.’
‘Precisely,’ Ellie said happily. ‘Perfect for skating. We almost don’t need a rink. Come on. We’re already late. If we don’t get a move on, they’ll have drunk all the mulled wine.’
Stella tucked her arm through Ellie’s and walked under the pretty arch that had been created from fairy-lights. A few brave people were already venturing onto the rink, holding the side and moving forward gingerly to the accompaniment of raucous shouts of encouragement from the outdoor bar.
‘Isn’t that Alan Hardman, the anaesthetist?’ Stella stared at the man wobbling on the ice and Ellie giggled.
‘It is Alan Hardman. I thought he was far too serious to try ice skating but rumour has it that he’s very much in love with Alison Waterman from Radiology and she’s the one wobbling next to him like Bambi. Oh, my goodness!’ Ellie dug her nails into Stella’s arm as the couple lost their balance and crashed heavily. ‘That had to hurt.’
‘And I thought this was going to be a night off for us, Ben,’ Daniel drawled, strolling up to them, two steaming mugs of mulled wine in his hands. ‘Obviously not. Get the traction ready.’
Stella felt her heart rate double as she looked at him.
Wearing a thick jumper with black jeans, Daniel looked nothing like a respectable emergency specialist.
He handed her and Ellie a drink and then pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans, watching the skaters with amusement. ‘Which idiot thought that this was a good venue for a party? If everyone breaks a bone, there’ll be no one left in the hospital to look after the patients.’
‘Stella won’t break anything.’ Ellie curved her hands around her hot drink. ‘She skated as a child and she’s awesome.’
Aware of Daniel’s curious glance, Stella blushed. ‘I always loved dancing. Ice skating was an opportunity to release my inner ballerina.’
‘Ben?’ Daniel lifted an eyebrow. ‘Do you fancy a spin on the ice to release your inner ballerina?’
‘I think Alan Hardman is releasing his inner elephant,’ Ellie observed, giggling as the anaesthetist crashed to the ice again.
Daniel winced. ‘Somebody ought to drag him off before he ends the evening in our department.’
Ben grinned. ‘You’ll have the chance to release your inner orthopaedic surgeon.’
‘Aren’t you guys drinking?’ Stella sipped the spiced wine and Daniel shook his head.
‘If I’m going to have to deal with major trauma, I’d rather be sober. It’s hard to align bones when you’re seeing double.’
‘I can’t drink. I can’t take the morning headache.’ Ben adjusted Ellie’s woolly hat, an affectionate look in his eyes. ‘I’m on early baby duty tomorrow. It’s Ellie’s turn for the lie-in. That means getting up at six in the morning ready to rock and roll.’
Daniel gave a sympathetic smile. ‘Until I looked after Patrick’s kids, that comment wouldn’t have meant anything to me. After experiencing Posy’s idea of a lie-in, you have my deepest sympathies.’
Remembering the special time they’d spent together with the children, suddenly Stella felt a desperate need to get away.
They were standing here, talking, and the only thing on her mind was Daniel.
Suddenly she wished she’d argued with the taxi driver. She should have paid him double to take her home and drop the lecture.
‘So this is where the action is.’ Patrick strolled up to them and everyone bombarded him with questions about Chicago.
‘Did you take the job?’ Ellie looked anxious and he smiled at her.
‘Why are you so worried? Are you pregnant again?’
Ben turned a shade paler. ‘Ellie?’
‘Not yet.’ Ellie gave him a saucy look and Stella felt a pang of envy.
To distract herself, she spoke to Patrick. ‘Did you enjoy yourself in Chicago?’
‘Yes.’ He took a mouthful of beer. ‘Actually, I did. Thanks for holding the fort. I gather I have you to thank for the fact that my barn is still inhabitable.’
Something in his expression made her look at him more closely. ‘There’s something different about you,’ she murmured, a frown in her eyes as she looked up at him. And then realisation dawned and she gave a little gasp. ‘Patrick? Did you meet someone?’
He hesitated for a few seconds. ‘No.’
‘Patrick!’ Excited for him, Stella drew him away from the others. ‘You did, didn’t you? You met someone! Tell me about it.’
‘Nothing to tell.’ He removed a flake of snow from her hair. ‘Let’s just say I enjoyed myself.’
‘Is she American? Are you going to see her again?’
‘I have two children and a job here.’ With a rueful smile, Patrick drained his drink. ‘It was good while it lasted, but not every relationship has a happy ending, as you well know.’
Stella looked towards Daniel and met his hot, intense gaze. ‘Yes,’ she said softly. ‘I do know. I’m sorry it didn’t work out for you. You deserve to meet someone lovely.’
‘Stella.’ A sandy-haired paediatrician she knew vaguely walked over to her. ‘Do you skate?’
‘Actually, I do,’ Stella said quickly, dragging her gaze away from Daniel. Maybe on the ice she’d forget. Muttering her excuses to Patrick, she handed her mulled wine to Ellie and opened the bag on her shoulder.
‘Whoa—are those your own skates I see coming out of that bag?’ Ben teased her, but Stella ignored him and laced her feet into the skates.
Then she removed her coat and the three men stood in stunned silence.
Ellie was the first to speak. ‘Wow,’ she said faintly. ‘Gorgeous skirt. And those red tights are stunning.’
‘I thought they were festive.’
‘You look like a very sexy helper of Father Christmas.’
The paediatrician obviously approved because he took her hand gallantly and the last thing Stella saw before he led her onto the ice were Daniel’s blue eyes glinting dangerously.
He had no right to be possessive, she thought miserably, gliding onto the ice without even thinking about it. Just as she had no right to want him.
Harry, the paediatrician, flailed along next to her, skating in straight lines and stopping by crashing straight into the side of the rink. Clutching the side for support, he looked helplessly at Stella. ‘You’ve obviously done this before. Any tips?’
‘The trick is not to fall over.’
‘Very funny.’
Stella prised his fingers away from the side. ‘You need to relax.’
He clutched her hand, wobbled and crashed to the ice taking her with him. ‘Sorry. That was a bit too relaxed.’
Laughing, Stella unravelled herself and stood up, deciding that it was possible to have fun after all. And then she turned her head and her eyes clashed with Daniel’s ice-cold gaze, and that single look withered her newborn happiness.
This wasn’t going to work, she thought desperately. They weren’t going to be able to pick up the threads of their life while they were working and living in the same community.
She w
as going to have to leave this little part of England that she loved so much. She was going to have to move away from her friends—leave Patrick and the children…
That sobering thought helped her to achieve her balance and she reached out a hand and pulled Harry to his feet. ‘Copy me. Watch…’ Delaying the moment when she’d have to return to her friends, Stella showed him how to move, how to balance, and then took his hand and guided him across the ice.
He was slowly gaining in confidence when a dark figure glided up to them.
‘My dance, I think.’ Daniel stood in front of them. To the casual observer he was relaxed and confident, but Stella sensed the simmering tension in his powerful frame.
Apparently unaware of any dangerous undercurrents, Harry raised his hands in a gesture of surrender. ‘If you can skate into the middle of the rink with no one holding your hand, you’re a better man than me, Buchannan. You win the lady’s hand.’
Clearly unaware of their previous relationship, Harry gave a good-natured smile and skated carefully off the ice.
Stella was left facing Daniel.
Without speaking, he took her hand and pulled her against him, his eyes on hers as he glided backwards, taking her with him. It didn’t surprise her that he was competent on the ice. Daniel was a natural athlete, physically fit and well co-ordinated. She doubted there was any sport that he wouldn’t excel at if he tried.
Feeling the dangerous throb of tension, she tried to lighten the mood. ‘I assume you’re releasing your inner ballerina.’
‘Actually, I’m releasing my inner caveman.’ His sardonic smile made her heart beat faster.
‘I can’t see why you’d be possessive.’
‘Can’t you?’
All the air seemed to have been sucked out of the atmosphere and suddenly she couldn’t breathe. It was no longer about skating and Christmas—it was about her and Daniel. ‘Who I skate with is none of your business.’ Frustrated, angry and confused, she tried to pull away from him but he held her fast. ‘I can skate with who I like. I can go home with who I like.’
‘Yes.’ But the cold glitter in his eyes told her that her reckless remark had turned the situation from tense to dangerous. ‘Is that what you wanted? To go home with him?’