I keep on running in my mind to find a rhyme to settle a time,
When I was hurt, in love, or just thought the world was blind,
It keeps on going over and over, running in my mind,
But I know I can't keep running and must face it this time.
An old friend's father passed away from a cancer like mine,
But my mum's fiancé on the same day was diagnosed at the time,
With cancer in his body and I became torn at my soul,
But I chose to be there for my family and let my friend go.
I regret not trying harder but my friend wasn't my partner,
So I chose my family and my partner which turned my world darker,
It was confusing and I'm sorry which is why I wrote them a poem,
But now and forever they'd prefer I just never of known them.
I prayed my father would find hers and help him on his way,
There's not a time that goes by where I wonder what I'd say,
But time moves on and cancer keeps on killing,
A cure is all I want and someday I pray that god willing.
I keep on running in my mind to find a rhyme to settle a time,
When I was hurt, in love, or just thought the world was blind,
It keeps on going over and over, running in my mind,
But I know I can't keep running and must face it this time.
There's so much to say, but how to find away to say what I have to,
There's so much to say, but how to find away to say what I have to,
One of these days I'll get it all out of the way and say what I have to,
But for the moment it's back to running because I know I have to.
Deeper (Than What's Written On The Page)
Sometimes I say silly things I don't really mean,
But then not tell anybody about some of my dreams,
At times I think I've reached my pinnacle in my life,
But I look over it with the missing of a house and a wife.
Now everyday feels like I've been writing more,
To ease the pain I have with invisible scabs and sores,
To remember what could've been looking at the before,
But know one of these days that change will walk through the door.
I'm deeper in my heart than what's written on the page,
I'm deeper in my soul than what's written on the page,
I'm deeper to my core than what's written on the page,
Trying to bring the deeper out and leave it on the page.
Wish I could grace the stage and lose all the fear I have,
Wish I could have a child because I'm told I'd be a good dad,
Wish I could buy everything for everyone, fulfil dreams they had,
Wish I could give up time on my life to know everyone's safe that makes me sad.
The way I open up to a plaque resting on a grave,
The way I never have followed any path you may of paved,
Know I just want to be remembered for worse or for better,
No one wants to leave knowing they'll never be remembered forever.
I'm deeper in my love than what's written on the page,
I'm deeper in my feelings than what's written on the page,
I'm deeper in apologies than what's written on the page,
Trying to bring the deeper out and leave it all on the page.
Until Next Rhyme
The thoughts keep flowing over and all in a blink,
I'm either typing or watching my pen run out of ink,
Trying to put into words those thoughts that I think,
Or the feelings I have and establish a link.
Feeling its time to start again on another poem,
Hearing it in my head without a word being spoken,
Feeling it in my heart after a part of me's been broken,
Just to learn and come back better is all I'm hoping.
I feel a weight lifted off of my mind,
Every time I write a rhyme,
Knowing it's all just a matter of rhyme,
Until the words come to me next time.
Until next rhyme that arrives in my mind,
Till I capture a thought and express it in time,
I'll keep waiting patiently until that time,
So I say farewell for now until next rhyme.
5 Years
5 years to the day that you passed away,
'Where has the time gone?' is what some would say,
But I just look to the heavens and pray,
Knowing 5 years ago today is when you passed away.
I feel like a bad son because I forgot in someway,
Something bothered me and was feeling off today,
But I didn't piece it together until mum mention this day in May,
The 18th of May is the day you passed away.
I remember laying in bed with Ash and startled by the phone,
I was half awake but when I heard mums footsteps, I then had known,
That the call was from Braeside and that you'd passed away,
Remembering that you'd only just shook my hand the previous day.
I cried visiting you, watching your mind deteriorate,
And in the end I guess we knew that heaven couldn't wait,
A father lost his son while sons lost their father,
5 years ago today is when my world got a little darker.
I remember my grandfather's tears for his son no longer here,
But knowing he was no longer in pain must help his eyes remain clear,
Come what may on every 18th of May, marking another year,
I will always remember you are a part of me for the rest of my years.
Star light, so bright, on this May 18th night,
I wish you might let me see my father tonight,
Just for him to let me know that he is alright,
And that I should keep going to be a shining light.
5 years today on the 18th of May,
Heaven called you home and you passed away,
I wish that you and everybody else that's passed could stay,
Just be there for us when we pass in to the light, guide the way.
I still remember you laying there with a tear down your cheek,
I know you were ready Dad and we'll meet when I sleep,
We'll meet when I sleep and on the day I'm deceased,
Until then Dad, I love you, watch over us and rest in peace.
In My Mind: This will sound freaky but I wrote the majority of this while standing in the cemetery at 8pm on the 18th of May. I'd felt bad the entire day and wasn't not going to visit his grave on the 5 year anniversary. The poem pretty much says it all and inspired the "Poppy Flower" poem to follow.
Poppy Flower
I'm trying here Dad to write but I don't know which direction,
Reading about the poppy flower and take its history into consideration,
When I remember them being passed at your grave and out of respect,
I didn't drop one because I'm not a soldier and in time I'll reflect.
I kissed and dropped a rose, hoping the petals would give you wings,
Give you a voice in heaven while strumming your guitar strings,
Your service friends dropped them but I broke down watching your father,
Helped by Darren's arm, they dropped in a poppy flower.
Growing in fields overseas where there was so much bloodshed,
It's no wonder that as a flower of remembrance it was adopted,
You saw some in your time and the loss of many lives,
Yet the day of your mum's funeral is the only time I saw tears in your eyes.
Not the one rolling down your cheek when people told you to sleep,
Tears and crying which made me believe you could find peace,
I never saw you cry again and made me think it's not a part of men,
The not show their heart and I wonder if that
's why I let go of great women.
Poppy flowers laying on your coffin comes to my mind often,
Poppy flowers for the loss of a great man and servicemen,
Poppy flowers I didn't drop on your grave out of respect for its history,
But I kissed and dropped a rose to give wings to you from me.
In My Mind: The original inspiration for this poem was when I watched my grandfather drop a poppy flower onto my father's casket after it had been lowered into the ground. In trying to confirm my suspicion regarding the significance of the poppy flower, I came across a deeper history and it complicated writing this poem in my mind. Hence the beginning of the poem being written the way it is. It almost seemed like it was destiny that I would do a small amount of research and inevitably write the poem the way that it is.
Dream Chaser
I'll be waiting till the end of time but do you remember the time?
When life was so much simpler and I would simply write a rhyme,
So many didn't because it was tucked away into a drawer,
Now I'm writing it with intensions of doing that no more.
The more private a go into my soul feels like it's my own score,
That's musical accompaniment as again in life I have to explore,
What makes me and occasionally lay the poetry on thick,
Almost like there's a clock in my mind the way I tick, tick, tick.
But I just want to be remembered and in a way admired,
So I keep working at it and pushing no matter how the words get tired,
Some call me a time waster, wish I'd turn to vapour,
But until that time I feel I've made it, I'll be a dream chaser.
No one's going to chase your own so make it on your own,
Even if they hate you and you have to go at it all alone,
Take your time and everyday become a little greater,
But we are all out there being our own dream chaser.
When it's all said and done with us all dead and gone,
I want to be forever carved into rock and not stone,
Words will grace my mind and bless my pen,
Forever till the end, I will be dream chasing.
I Want To Know What It Feels Like (One Day)
I want to know what it feels like to have the crowd in your palm,
All eyes on you while they are singing and dancing along,
I want to know what it feels like and to better understand,
How it feels when you are singing a song and they clap their hands.
I want to know what it feels like to take the mic and have the show of the night,
The show of your life, caught up in the hype of the spotlight,
I want to know what it feels like to have thousands screaming your name,
Raising the roof and spirits higher then you can fly a plane.
I want to know what it feels like to make a thousand people happy at once,
Ten thousand, Fifty thousand, from the top to the bottom, back to front,
I want to know what it feels like to have my song come on the radio,
Then play me over and over with remixes making me fast or slow.
I want to know the thrill of changing a life in just one night,
When they look at you and know that they want to do that for life,
I want to know what it feels like to have a million people buy what you write,
What you sing, what you record, knowing that you got it all right.
One day I want to know what it's like,
What it's like in the spotlight,
What it's like to rock the mic,
To have a moment that'll change your life.
When Will I Write (To Change a Life)
The wheels are spinning and words are in motion,
Trying to put it together and spell to create a potion,
A poem, rhyme, something to read like a book that's open,
Trying to find love, fame and change a life is what I'm hoping.
Music clouds my mind too and occasionally I cross the line,
Thinking maybe that'd make a better sounding song than rhyme,
I've done it before and so it's just a matter of time,
But I know I'm here forever so I have forever to shine.
But I may not be here physically in that limited time,
Maybe my rhymes will be studied and dissected like they're a crime,
Committed alphabet murder to the nth degree,
With all my words, rhymes and poetry pointing at me.
When will I write a poem that'll change a life?
When will I write a song that'll change a life?
When will I write something that'll change the world overnight?
Could be anywhere, anytime, even tonight.
Poetry brought me closer is relationships because it shared,
A part of me, my heart, something's I wasn't prepared to say,
But the more I write now brings hope to me every passing day,
That through my writing again, I just might find a way.
I keep delving deeper expecting that the last I write to be it forever,
Maybe reason is within me under all of this like buried treasure,
Right now people just read me like listening to songs at their leisure,
Like I'm only prescribed to be read so often, so take a cup and measure.
This one's a little more aggressive like I feel like my life's owed to me,
Like I have a winning ticket but for it there's no lottery,
But for now I'll continue till its a million books that I write,
Hoping one day to write to no only change my own but all of life.
When will I write a poem that'll change a life?
When will I write a song that'll change a life?
When will I write something that'll change the world overnight?
Could be anywhere, anytime, even tonight.
World As One (WAO)
I wonder who will write those songs Michael did previously,
About changing the world and not thinking selfishly,
Standing up for love and creating your own legacy,
Or will his name being smeared be how he's remembered in history.
A long time ago I thought about WAO and the world as one,
Wondering if that time would ever manage to come,
When we would change humanity and lay down your gun,
Say WAO and believe in the ideal of the world as one.
I hold my head high in the hope to one day hear WAO,
A signal you are ready to change for tomorrow,
To love and share a little more and let the hate go,
Let me hear you say WAO when you're ready for a better tomorrow.
There's a good person in everyone that's just been hurt,
So many relate when we find an attachment like punk with Kurt,
We have that place we go to, to go through what we have to,
I found myself all within the written art and now tell me what you do.
WAO is connection through more than verbal communication,
More than cooperation and ending spiteful competition,
We can all be good sports and end any hateful tirade,
We just have to be ready to take the first step to a brighter day.
WAO stands for World As One and how it should be done,
Together we can build a world to leave our daughters and sons,
World As One should be the goal to eliminate the social neglect,
It's not just ourselves but the future we need to protect.
In A Dream
Nothing but the sounds of a piano set the scene,
The running on the pavement till his face turns green,
Stopping to catch his breath against a pole he leans,
This is the movie that I see in my dream.
His mobile ringing and just a voice saying help me,
He's running harder a
s the voice didn't sound healthy,
He says what he thought was her and the figure turns to dust,
Again another and another but he just wasn't fast enough.
The streets become wider and the colours fade away,
Running to the horizon like everything was tilting that way,
He sees hands reaching for him but that just refuse to stay,
Trying, he lunges, but again they just slip away.
The colour and hands, lighting all vanishing to a point,
Darkness casting over and aches throughout his joints,
The world vanishes and it's like floating in space,
The last glimpse of light and colour fading from this place.
He watches as it's gone and there's no light to be found,
He can't see his hands or body and there's also no sound,
Is there air to breath? Is there anything around?
Faint static from his phone brings him to a theoretical ground.
Crackles and faints, cries that linger in the air,
Then the faint whisper from her saying "Are you there?"
Suddenly a feedback noise screeches and blares,
Echoing through outcomes are you there from everywhere.
A burst of white floods the surrounding walls,
Gravity become literal and he has a small fall,
A technicolour floods through and what reappears is the street,
Somewhere it is here that we would be destined to meet.
But with every blink the scene changes but a figure remains,
Always standing in the same place no matter of sun, wind or rain,
Trying to hold his eyes open and never take another blink,
He's become disorientated and the world begins to shrink.
The last words to grace his ears are I am out there somewhere,
That's when I wake from the sun's glare,
Looking out my window into the ever going blue sky,
You are out there but not with me now and I don't know why.
Concourse
The waves lap against the rocks gently giving a calming scene,
Pacing on the concourse back and forth wishing it was a dream,
It couldn't be a reality that our love has run out of steam,
Through My Rhymes - Volume 3 Page 2