Xander reached out and gently cupped her cheek. He focused on her dark eyes, which overflowed with doubt. “We don’t have to know all the answers right away. There’s no rush. I asked you out on a date because I wanted to see you again. I’ve regretted losing you since the moment you walked away. I just didn’t know what to do about it. When I saw you standing there at the diner, I couldn’t help myself. I wanted to see if the magic was still there.”
“Is it?”
Xander stepped closer until their bodies were nearly touching and wrapped his arms around her waist. He tugged her tight against him, pressing the firm heat of his desire into her stomach. “Oh yeah.”
A soft smile curled her lips as she reached up and laced her fingers together at the base of his neck. She deliberately pressed forward, grinding against his sensitive parts until he had to close his eyes and swear softly. Xander had had Rose the past two nights. Multiple times. But it didn’t matter. He’d thought his enthusiasm for her years ago had had more to do with teenage hormones than anything else, but he couldn’t blame that now. He had to face the truth.
Rose was the most precious creature he’d ever held in his arms and his body craved her touch. The more he had of her, the more he wanted. A part of him wished he weren’t so responsible. Then maybe he could throw caution to the wind and let himself fall hopelessly in love with this woman. The other part of him urged him to hold back. Something would go wrong, and when it did, they wouldn’t have the luxury of just walking away from one another again. They had a son to consider.
But he knew, deep down, that he couldn’t walk away from Rose again. The first time had been a tragic mistake, however necessary it had seemed then. This time he wasn’t sure he had the strength to leave while she still wanted him to stay. Somehow, some way, he would find a way to keep her in his arms where she belonged.
“Joey is important, but this isn’t all about him. I asked you out before I knew about him. I kissed you in the parking lot before I knew about him. These last two weeks haven’t just been about our son. They’ve been about us, too. I want to see where this can go, Rose.”
“So do I,” she admitted softly. “But I don’t want to be your dirty little secret, either. I don’t want to be a skeleton in your closet that can ruin your reelection campaign.”
“You’re not,” he said. “And I don’t want to keep you a secret. Or Joey. I’ve been thinking about this a lot since that night at the carnival. You were right. I hadn’t really thought all this through. I know we agreed to wait to go public, but I think it’s unfair to you and to me. So I called my lawyer this morning.”
“Your lawyer? Why?”
“He’s from D.C., so I need him to study up on Connecticut family law and find out what we need to do going forward. I want to legally acknowledge Joey as my son. Then I want to publically disclose his existence and beat the press to the punch. It will just be a happy reunion story with no sharp edge to cut us.”
“What about my father?”
If Xander were standing in front of Billy Pierce right now, he’d punch him in the jaw. Somehow he managed to continue ruining things and making Rose worry incessantly without even being around. “You’re not your father. If the press brings it up, we’ll address it, but I’ve decided it doesn’t have anything to do with you and me and Joey. I think a lot of people have one of those relatives.”
She nodded blankly, but he could tell she wasn’t entirely sold on the idea. “So we go public,” she clarified, “and then the whole town knows that I lied to them about Joey.”
Xander tried not to laugh at her worries. He couldn’t believe there was someone more concerned with appearances than he was. “Why should they care? He’s not their son.”
“You know how small towns are, Xander. You’re going to head back to D.C. and I’ll have to face the backlash alone. Half the town already feels sorry for me and the other half ignores me. I don’t want to be the center of gossip, or worse, for Joey to be.”
“Then I think we need to seriously consider you moving to D.C. You can get away from all of that and start fresh in a big new city that doesn’t care about your past.”
Her dark eyes widened, her teeth pulling gently at her full bottom lip with concern. “That’s one way to avoid Cornwall gossip, but it’s a pretty drastic step. I don’t know that we’re ready for the kind of commitment.”
“We don’t have to be. Sharing a child doesn’t mean we have to change our relationship trajectory or move faster than either of us is comfortable. If you move to D.C. and we don’t work out as a couple, it won’t change anything with our arrangement with Joey. But I would hate for us to not give this a chance because we’re afraid of something that might not even happen.”
She shook her head, diverting her eyes from his. Xander took advantage of her movement to dip down and place a kiss against the long column of her neck. She gasped softly into his ear and leaned farther to give him the access he needed. His lips moved over her soft, pale flesh, tasting the saltiness of her skin and the sharp acidity of the perfume she’d dabbed along her pulse points.
“Come back with me this weekend.” He spoke against the column on her throat. “What can it hurt? It might even help.”
“How could it help?”
“It might help you figure out what you want. Where the two of us are in this relationship.”
His mouth moved up her neck to her earlobe, biting gently and teasing the sensitive spot just behind it. His fingertips stroked her rib cage through the silky fabric of her dress, moving higher until one firm breast filled his hand. His thumb grazed over the hardened tip as it pressed insistently at the fabric, begging for freedom and the pleasure of his touch.
“You want to know where I think we stand, Rose?” Xander asked as he pulled the zipper of her dress down a few inches. It allowed him to tug the straps of her dress down her shoulders to expose the thin satin bra beneath it. His mouth moved over the fabric, dampening it and making her squirm against him. He pulled down the strap and exposed her perfect, full breast.
“Yes,” she panted, although he was fairly certain it had nothing to do with the question he asked and everything to do with his hands.
Xander dipped his head and took the firm pink nipple into his mouth. He teased it with his tongue before drawing hard on it and eliciting a sharp gasp from her throat. He tortured her with pleasure for a few more moments before standing upright and focusing his gaze into the dark eyes that were hazy with her desire for him.
“If I have anything to say about it, Rose...my vote is for very close together. Come with me this weekend. Please.”
“All right,” Rose finally agreed with an exasperated smile. “If I can get the time off, I will go. But—” She started to speak but was silenced by Xander’s hungry lips on her own.
“No buts,” he said, backing her down the hallway to her bedroom.
* * *
“This is my place,” Xander said, leading Rose through the entryway of his town house and into the living room. “It was built in 1909 but was fully renovated in 1990. I had the hardwood floors refinished and put in some new appliances, but that was about it. The previous owner had taken great care of it.” He set down her bags and turned to look at her when she didn’t respond.
She was lost in her thoughts, taking in every detail. Rose brushed past him to look up the staircase and step into the large kitchen. It had oak cabinets the same shade as the floors and brown-and-black-swirled granite countertops.
She paused at the kitchen island with the bar-height stools that lined it. He could just picture her serving Joey Pop-Tarts at that counter, a thought that made him smile. He wasn’t certain if he could get Rose to agree to live with him here, but this trip was a start. He needed to convince her that D.C. wasn’t scary.
Xander wasn’t entirely certain he was succeeding. Rose looked a little overwhelmed. He could tell her brain was struggling to keep up with the fast-paced changes her life had taken since Wednesday night. O
nce she’d agreed to go with him, the wheels had been set into motion and there’d been no changing her mind.
Sweet-talking her boss into giving her the weekend off was like child’s play. Earlier today they drove to Hartford and caught a small charter jet provided by his publisher. The flight was short, but their time in the air was luxurious, with plush leather seats and a flight attendant who plied them with champagne and an amuse-bouche the moment they boarded.
They were picked up by a limousine, which made the rush-hour D.C. traffic a little easier to bear. Fortunately, it wasn’t a long drive from Reagan Airport to his town house. He asked the driver to take the scenic route, allowing Rose to see the glowing sights of the National Mall in the dim evening light. He wished he had time to walk with her down to the Reflecting Pool and chat with Lincoln, but if all went well, they would have plenty of opportunity to do that later.
“Do you like it?” he asked.
Rose chuckled and ran her fingers along the exposed brick wall. “It’s wonderful.” She pushed aside the drapes to look into the small private courtyard in back. “That’s the perfect space for entertaining. And this kitchen is like a dream. I love the double ovens and the grill built into the range. I bet you could make—” She paused and turned to him with a smile. “You don’t make anything in here, do you?”
“Not at all. I think I’ve microwaved popcorn and soup.”
Rose shook her head and strolled back to the island to lean against the countertop. “Such a waste! And I cook at home in an oven older than Joey. It’s really amazing how much space you have. It looks so small from the outside.”
“It really is deceiving. It has a full finished basement downstairs that’s perfect for a family room. There’s three bedrooms upstairs, too.”
“It’s a big place for just you. How long have you owned it?”
“I bought it a few weeks after I was elected. I decided this was where I belonged and I fell in love with this place the moment I saw the bay window out front. I knew that if and when I married, it would be perfect for a family.”
Xander wasn’t going to admit to her that the house had felt very empty since he’d moved in. He had envisioned the potential, but as the years went by and he remained single, the town house had almost started to mock him with its large hollow rooms. Just another reason to stay late at work.
But now he could just picture Rose baking in the kitchen while Joey played video games in the basement family room. It was as crystal clear a vision as if she were really there, surrounded by pans and bowls of batter.
“Would you like to see the upstairs?”
Rose nodded, stifling a yawn. “I’d love to get up close and personal with a bed.”
Xander smiled and scooped up her bag from the living room. “I can arrange that. We’ve got a big day tomorrow. You need your rest.”
“Big day?” Rose asked, following him up the stairs. “I thought there was just the signing and the party.”
“Well, yes. But preparing for those things takes time. I wanted to take you shopping in the morning before the signing. And after, I thought you’d appreciate some salon pampering.”
Rose stopped on the stairs and frowned. “You don’t think what I packed is nice enough, do you? It’s the fanciest thing I had. I don’t go to many charity galas.”
Xander turned and went back down a few steps until he could tip up Rose’s chin and force her to look at him. “Did I say what you brought wasn’t good enough?”
“No,” she muttered.
“I want to treat you to a day of girlish pleasures. I don’t want you feeling self-conscious—like right now—when you walk into that ballroom. I want you to feel beautiful and confident, as if you belong there, because you do. You could walk in the room wearing cutoffs and I’d still think you were the most gorgeous thing I’d ever seen. But I thought you’d prefer something a little more glamorous.”
Rose nodded and started back up the stairs beside him. “I didn’t want to come up here and be a burden. You have things to do, too. You don’t need to spend all your time cleaning me up to take me out.”
They reached the landing and he gestured her to go right into the master suite. “Rose, I’m a man. I shower, put on a suit and show up. That’s all I’ll do ahead of the signing. My publisher sets it all up. I only have to arrive and sign books. I’ll switch into a tuxedo before the gala, but again, not a big deal. I’d much rather watch you thoroughly enjoy getting the royal treatment.”
He pushed open the French doors that guarded the entrance to his bedroom and stepped aside to let Rose go in ahead of him.
“I feel like I’m already getting the royal treatment. Fancy jets, limousines, champagne...and then this place. My bedroom looks like a cheap hotel compared to yours.”
He watched Rose stroll into the only room in the house that felt fully lived-in to him. His bedroom was his retreat, his only perfectly private and safe place in the world. He might have let his decorator go a little overboard in this room, but he loved the result.
“Look at this bed!” she said, gesturing toward the king-size mattress with the massive carved wooden four-poster bedframe that dominated the far wall. The sheets were dark brown silk, like the color of Rose’s eyes. The comforter was a delicately stitched patchwork of silk, leather, tapestry and velvet in shades of brown, beige and blue. A large mahogany credenza at the foot of the bed hid away a fifty-inch flat-screen television that would rise up with the push of a button.
“It’s just a bed. It might be fancy, but in the end, it serves the same purpose. I recall your bed being most excellent for lovemaking and sleep. What does it matter when my eyes are closed?”
Rose sat down on the edge of the bed and groaned aloud. “It matters. It sure as hell does.” She flopped back against it and sighed. “This is like sleeping on a cloud of velvet. Even with my eyes closed, I can tell this is better.”
Xander set her bags over near the small seating area and made his way over to where she was lying. “I don’t know,” he said. He eased onto the bed beside her and propped his head up on his elbow. “I think I need a thorough comparison before I can make a judgment. We should do everything on this bed just the same as we did on yours.”
Rose chuckled and turned her head to look up at him. “I thought I needed my rest for the big day ahead.”
Xander placed his hand on Rose’s stomach and stroked over her blouse to play at the edge of the underwire in her bra. “Sleep is overrated.”
Ten
Rose felt like an impostor.
She certainly didn’t look like one, thanks to a luxurious private shopping spree at Neiman Marcus and half a day at an upscale salon having her hair, makeup and nails done. She supposed if you threw enough money at the cause, you could transform anyone’s appearance. Tonight she looked more like a princess than a waitress.
Her strapless gown was like something out of a fairy tale. It was a shimmering dusky gold, almost pinkish, with intricate beading on the fitted bodice that exploded out into layers of flowing, glittering tulle. It had movement and sparkle, ideal for dancing, and it went perfectly with the strappy gold heels with Swarovski crystals her shopping assistant had chosen.
Her hair was swept up into an elegant twist that highlighted the long line of her neck and décolletage. She wore a rose-gold choker studded with tiny diamonds at her throat and a matching bracelet on her wrist. She looked sophisticated and elegant—as though she fit in with the rich and important people all around her.
But that was on the outside. On the inside she was just a nobody from Cornwall. A single mother. A waitress. The daughter of a felon. Surely there wasn’t enough fancy clothing and makeup to cover that up. Eventually, someone would notice she didn’t belong here.
Walking into the ballroom on Xander’s arm, she’d felt like Cinderella going to the ball, minus the mice and the pumpkins. Her fairy godmother came in the form of a black American Express card with Xander’s name on it. Her prince had bought her entire
outfit for tonight, plus a more casual dress she’d worn to his afternoon signing. Rose couldn’t look at the total when they were done, but he hadn’t even flinched, signing the slip with a smile.
Now he beamed with pride beside her. He’d wanted Rose to be confident and he’d given her every reason to feel as if she fit in. Every eye that fell on her was followed with a warm smile in greeting. Some of the men’s gazes were heated with attraction. Some of the women’s eyes were tainted with a touch of jealousy. But they all looked at her. Or at least, they looked at Xander and then wondered who the woman with him was.
“Are you okay?” Xander asked as they blended into the crowd.
Rose nodded, but it was a lie. She didn’t want him to know how nervous she was when he was so concerned about her enjoying herself tonight. She appreciated how hard he was trying to make this trip special. He genuinely wanted her to move to the area. She should be happy that he wanted to spend as much time with Joey as he could. That he was willing to support them in a town so expensive.
Instead she was waiting for the other shoe to drop. It always did.
“Would you like some champagne?” Xander asked. There were several bars set up along the edges of the ballroom and one nearby.
“Please,” she said, although she knew that meant being left alone for a few minutes. It was worth it to get enough of a buzz to relax her body and mind. Maybe then she could enjoy herself the way he wanted her to.
Xander squeezed her hand and then disappeared through the crowd of people to the bar.
Rose took a deep breath once she was alone to calm herself. There really wasn’t a threat she could see. Just a bunch of rich people mingling and sipping cocktails. Not exactly a dangerous situation, but still her heart was racing, her body tense and prepared for a fight-or-flight response.
Her entire life, she’d doubted that she would ever be able to make it in Xander’s fast-paced, glamorous world. When Xander had asked her to come with him to Georgetown, she’d been too afraid to go. Even if her mother hadn’t been sick, she would’ve sought out an excuse. Fate had forced her hand and here she was in D.C., testing the waters at last. She was certain that she would immediately be fingered as an outsider, but so far, so good. She’d gotten a few glances, but at least no one had called security on her.
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