by Cher Carson
He couldn’t believe his mother had lived with this knowledge for all these years. He suspected she may have an inkling of what he was into. As she said, Brant was a small town and people talked, but to know that she knew was a tough pill to swallow. He loved his mother, and he always tried to make her proud, but he had to live his own life, to do what made him happy.
“I just don’t want you to make the same mistake with Charlene,” she said, quietly. “She’s just not into things like that. She’s a good girl, a nice girl, and I know her family intends to see to it that she stays that way.”
Cole scowled. “How the hell do you know what she’s into, Mama? What happens between a man and a woman in the privacy of their bedroom is no one’s business but their own.”
Ruth squared her shoulders and met her son’s glare. “I happen to know that Charlene’s parents want you to keep your distance, son. Paul is a kind, decent man.” She held her hand up. “That’s not to say that you’re not, but…” She seemed distressed when she said, “Her parents think he’s better suited to her, and I hate to say this, but I have to agree.”
Her words hurt more than he’d ever admit. His own mother was turning on him? “I can’t believe you just said that.” He bit back his next words when he heard little footsteps running down the stairs.
“Nana, look what I found…” Cassidy ran into the room with a round loom, trailing a ball of yarn behind her. “Last time I was here, you said you’d teach me how to use this.”
Ruth forced a smile for her granddaughter as she glanced at her son out of the corner of her eye. “We’ll have plenty of time for that tomorrow. Why don’t we finish these cookies tonight, okay?”
Cassidy shrugged. “Okay.” She looked up at her father and frowned. “What’s wrong, Daddy? You look mad.”
Cole forced himself to smile. “No, sweetie, I’m not mad.” He reached for her, picking her up and turning in a circle as he kissed her chubby cheeks, one at a time. “You be a good girl for your nana, and I’ll call you in the morning, okay? I love you.” He buried his face in her hair and inhaled her sweet scent. He would do anything for his baby girl, and if it he had to bank his own desires to give her the mother she needed, that’s what he would do.
Chapter Four
Charlene put the finishing touches on a pot roast when the doorbell rang. She groaned, hoping it wasn’t Paul, intent on surprising her. She’d told him she needed some time to herself this weekend and he promised to keep his distance, but according to him, he wouldn’t be able to stop thinking about her. Her life would be so much easier if only she felt the same way.
Her stomach lurched when she saw the familiar shadow through the pane of glass in the front door. Cole. What the hell was he doing here? She could pretend to be in the shower, but since he’d already seen her, that wasn’t an option.
After pasting a smile on her face, she pulled the door open, hoping to see Cassidy’s little face smiling up at her. If ever she’d needed a chaperone to help her resist the allure of the man who kept her awake at night with naughty fantasies about the night he almost made all of her dreams come true, this would be the time. She was getting tired of pretending she wasn’t attracted to him, that he was just the parent of a student she cared about… He was so much more than that and they both knew it.
“Hi.” She shivered against the blast of cold air that had her nipples puckering beneath her thin cotton tank top. Pulling her hoodie around her mid-section, she asked, “Where’s your shadow tonight?”
He gave her a thorough once-over, letting her know that he’d already seen it all and hadn’t forgotten a damn thing. “She’s bakin’ cookies with her nana.” He propped a hand against the doorframe and leaned into her. “You alone, or what?”
Telling him that she wasn’t would be so easy, but the promise of spending some alone time with him was impossible to resist. “Yeah, why?”
“Aren’t ya gonna invite me in?”
The subtle scent of his cologne seemed to seep into her pores as she remembered how being one with him felt. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea.” A car drove slowly past, and she knew one of the well-meaning neighbors was probably checking up on her when they saw an unfamiliar truck parked outside. The last thing she needed was for people to start gossiping about her houseguest, but sending him away seemed unthinkable. In spite of her mock protest, she knew she couldn’t let him go until she found out why he came.
“You have plans tonight?” His eyes raked over her, settling on her lips.
She licked her lips, smiling when he groaned. Knowing she had that kind of power over him was a powerful stimulant indeed. “No, I told Paul I needed a little alone time this weekend.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Really? Why’s that? You havin’ second thoughts about him?”
Charlene wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of admitting as much, but she knew her relationship with Paul had run its course. She just had to figure out how to let him down gently, without hurting his feelings. “Can’t a girl just take a few days for herself without everyone questioning her about it?” She didn’t mean to sound so defensive, but between Paul, her parents, and now Cole, you’d think she’d announced she intended to take a year sabbatical to retreat to Tibet.
He slid a finger under her chin, coaxing him to look her in the eye. “You wanna tell me what’s really goin’ on with you? You haven’t been yourself the past few days. I know something’s eatin’ at you.”
She closed her eyes against the powerful image his words evoked. Damn him. Why couldn’t he just leave her alone? Maybe then she’d be able to move on with a nice guy like Paul. Seeing Cole nearly every day was the problem, but she couldn’t find the courage to demand he keep his distance, not when she looked so forward to their daily coffee breaks.
Reaching for the front of his leather jacket, she pulled him inside and closed the door. “No sense letting all the heat out.”
“I don’t think you need to worry about that, darlin’,” he said, moving in to inhale her scent. “You and I are generatin’ enough heat to set this house on fire.”
He was right; she could feel the sexual tension like a living, breathing entity between them. “Um, I just made a pot roast. Have you had dinner yet?”
He trailed a finger over her cheek as he stared her down. “I didn’t come here for dinner.”
She knew why he came; it was obvious from the look in his eyes, his stance, and every word that remained unspoken between them. “Well, I was just about to eat. You’re welcome to join me.”
“I’m hungry,” he whispered in her ear, stirring her hair with his hot breath. “But not for food.”
Lord help her.
What had happened between them when she followed him home from Dixie’s was supposed to be an anonymous one-night stand, nothing more. After the way he kicked her out, she never imagined they’d become friends, but all of the coffee breaks, field trips, and class projects he volunteered for meant they spent a lot of time together in recent months. And she saw a side of him others clearly didn’t. He was so much more than just the dominant lover everyone speculated about. He was a loving and devoted father and son. A smart, funny, sexy man. More importantly, she’d come to count him among her friends. She looked forward to the end of the day when she’d see him again, and whenever she thought about telling him he should keep his distance, it made her heart ache.
She was falling for him, and she didn’t know how to stop it.
“Do you ever think about it?” He wrapped his hands around her wrist, tugging her closer. “What it was like between us that night? You were so free, so uninhibited. You can’t tell me it didn’t feel good.”
No, she couldn’t tell him that. But if she told him the truth, that he’d made her feel things no one else had, she’d never be able to make him understand why they couldn’t be together. Small town folks had notoriously small minds, at least the residents of Brant County did, and she knew they wouldn’t want one of their own hooking up with
a man everyone considered a deviant. If only they knew him like she did.
Clearing her throat, she took a step back. “My pot roast is getting cold.”
He smirked before following her into the kitchen and accepting the seat she offered. “How’d your boyfriend take it when you told him you needed a little time to yourself this weekend?” he asked, slipping his leather jacket off and hanging it on the back of his chair.
“I’m sure he didn’t mind. It’ll give him a chance to spend some quality time with his daughter.” She plated their food and poured two glasses of wine from the bottle of merlot she’d opened earlier. She considered sitting across the small table, but she knew that would betray her discomfort, and with a man like Cole, a woman had to stand her ground. He could smell fear and weakness, and she knew he wouldn’t hesitate to capitalize on it to get her into bed.
“If you were my woman, I wouldn’t let you spend one night alone.”
She cursed the tremor in her hand when she picked up her wine glass. “Everyone needs a little space now and again. It’s healthy for a relationship.”
“Is that what you have with him, a relationship?” He smiled as he leaned back in his chair to regard her. “I gotta tell ya, I get the impression you’re not all that into him.”
She forked a baby carrot into her mouth, taking her time to chew as she thought of a reasonable response. She wanted to tell him it was none of his business, but she knew that would never work. When he wanted answers, he typically got them. “He’s a very nice man.”
Cole chuckled. “Nice, huh? That tells me all I need to know.”
“There’s nothing wrong with being nice. In fact, I think it’s a very desirable quality in a man.”
“Liar.”
She should argue with him, but what was the point? He was right. She didn’t like nice men. She liked sexy, edgy, dangerous men. Like Cole. “You’re pretty sure of yourself, aren’t you?”
“You’re forgetting I know what turns you on. You can’t fake a reaction like that.”
Charlene wanted to pretend she didn’t know what he was talking about, but they both knew she did. “I’d rather not talk about—”
“When we had sex… you wanted more.” He looked her in the eye, daring her to look away. “You wanted to see how far I’d push you. You wanted to step outside of your comfort zone, test the limits of your—”
“Stop!” She set her utensils down beside her plate as she tried to regulate her breathing. She knew she was flushed, her breathing was labored, her nipples were tight and aching… No question about it, she was aroused, and she hated it.
“You don’t want me to stop,” he whispered, pushing his chair back and standing up. “You’re so busy worryin’ about what everybody else wants.” He hooked his boot into the leg of her chair, turning her to face him as he towered over her, his stomach level with her mouth. “But what about what you want?”
She tried to close her eyes, to shut out the evidence of his arousal staring her in the face, but he wouldn’t let her.
He took her hand and closed it over his erection. “That’s what you do to me.” He grit his teeth. “Every damn time I see you, I remember, and I get hard just thinkin’ about what it felt like, havin’ you bent over that car, takin’ you from behind, makin’ you scream my name…”
He wove a powerful spell, merging the past with the present and the possibilities he promised in the future, if only she was brave enough to take him up on his unspoken offer. “Please…”
“Don’t tell me you want me to stop. You know you don’t.” He knelt down in front of her, his hands on her knees, gently prying her legs apart. “It’s okay to be different, to want things other people don’t understand. What happens between us is nobody’s business but ours, sweetheart.”
She wanted to believe that, but she’d lived here her whole life. Privacy was just an illusion in this town. Everyone knew everyone else’s business, and she didn’t want to be the teacher everyone talked about around the water cooler on Monday morning. “I can’t do this. I know you don’t understand, but I have my job, my family—”
“What about what you want?” He brushed his thumb over her nipple, back and forth, slowly, hypnotically, testing her reaction. When she didn’t push him away, he slipped a hand under the thin barrier of cotton and began tweaking and teasing her with his hands until her eyes drifted closed on a helpless whimper.
She tried to control her reactions to this man, but it was hopeless. It was like he had mapped her body and he was intent to lead her to climax, with or without her consent. “I don’t know what I want.”
“Yes, you do.” He pulled her to her feet as he pushed the hoodie off her shoulders, letting it fall to the floor at their feet. He honed in on a sensitive spot in the hollow of her neck, licking and nipping at her delicate skin until she felt boneless. “You want me. You want me to make you feel good, like only I can.”
He absorbed her helpless sob when he took her mouth, kissing her savagely, mercilessly.
Then she saw the dominant man rest of the world knew existed, but never saw. His eyes were dark and glittered dangerously as he pulled back to look at her. His chest heaved with every breath he took, and she knew he wanted to punish her for making him lose control.
“You hate feeling this way, don’t you?” She licked her lips when he grasped her wrists in one hand and pinned her arms behind her back. “You hate losing control.” She knew she was a fool to bait him, but she needed to know that he felt as helpless as she did.
“No one has ever done this to me.” He snagged her bottom lip between his teeth, licking and nipping at random. “I didn’t think I could feel this way. Sex is supposed to be sex, that’s all.” He closed his eyes, as though he was trying to prevent her from seeing more than he felt ready to reveal. “I can control that, but this…” He sucked the delicate skin at the base of her neck into his mouth hard, marking her. “I hate feelin’ like this, like you’re the one controllin’ me.” He muttered a curse. “It’s not supposed to be like this.”
She knew being so vulnerable killed him, and it made her want him more. He may be able to dominate women with his expertise and quiet commands, but he couldn’t control what he felt, or the effect it had on him. “Why did you come here tonight?” she asked, tipping her head back to give him access to her neck.
“To have sex with you.”
“Liar.”
Cole backed her against the nearest wall, raising her higher until her breasts were level with his mouth. He drew her nipple into his mouth, soaking the thin cotton barrier as he sucked on the pebbled peaks ruthlessly.
“Take this off,” she begged. “Please, I need to feel your mouth on me.”
He looked at her for a fraction of a second before letting her slide to her feet. “Did I see a fire goin’ in the living room?”
Too shaken to speak, she only nodded.
He grabbed her hand and led her into the living room. After stopping in front of the fireplace, he took a step back, keeping her at arm’s length. “Take your clothes off, nice and slow.”
Cole could barely breathe as he watched her strip for him. He wrestled with the voice inside his head, telling him to give her what he knew she wanted. But the last thing he intended was to scare her, so he tried to control his natural urge to demand her complete and total surrender.
She wouldn’t be ready to abandon her need for propriety and stop worrying about what other people thought for some time. In the meantime, he would slowly, gradually push her a little further out of her comfort zone every time they made love, until eventually she was willing to acknowledge that she wanted the same kind of relationship he did.
She kicked her panties aside and stood before him, looking shy and apprehensive as his eyes roamed her body, taking in every swell, curve, and freckle. She was perfect. Petite, with the gentle softness he craved.
“Tell me you’re still on the pill.”
“Yes.”
Nothing rivaled t
he thrill and intimacy of taking her bareback. “I’m gonna tell you want I want you to do, and if you don’t respond right away, there will be consequences.”
Her eyes widened in surprise. “I’m not sure—”
“Sssh,” he said, holding his finger up to his lip. “Don’t talk. Just listen. I want you to show me what makes you feel good.” His erection strained painfully behind the confines of his jeans, but he knew he had to remain fully clothed if he had a prayer of keeping his arousal in check.
“But I—”
“I said I don’t want you to talk. Just listen and do what I tell you to.” He knew she was used to gentle, considerate lovers, but he couldn’t pretend to be someone he wasn’t, not even for her. “Lick your thumbs.” Her slight hesitation made him question whether she was going to defy him, but he suppressed a groan when she slid her thumbs, one after the other, deep into her mouth, coating them with her saliva as she waited for his next order.
“Cup your tits and brush your thumbs over your nipples.” He closed his eyes for a split second, trying to regain his composure when she widened her stance and tilted her head back. “That’s it, now pinch harder. Show me how you like it.” He watched, mesmerized, as she fondled her full breasts, tweaking her nipples as she rolled them between her thumb and forefinger.
Not taking over took every ounce of self-control he possessed. He was dying to touch her, but he knew he had to help her lose her inhibitions so they could have the kind of relationship he was convinced they both wanted. “You like that, don’t you, baby? Feels good?”
“Yes.”
He couldn’t wait to hear her call him sir, to acquiesce to his every command without question, but he knew that would come in time, when she learned to trust him to give her pleasure beyond her wildest expectations. What she’d experienced in his arms the last time would pale in comparison to what he had in store for her tonight.