A Small Town In Germany

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A Small Town In Germany Page 9

by A Small Town in Germany [lit]


  'Philosopher, are we?'

  'Always willing,' Gaunt continued, very slow to follow the changes in Turner's mood. 'You ask Arthur Meadowes now, there's an example. The moment Leo's in Registry, not hardly a day after, he's down here collecting the mail. "Don't you bother," he says to Arthur. "Save your legs, you're not so young as you were and you've plenty to worry about already. I'll fetch it for you, look." That's Leo. Obliging. Saintly really, considering his disadvantages.'

  'What mail?'

  'Everything. Classified or Unclassified, it didn't make no difference. He'd be down here signing for it, taking it up to Arthur.'

  Very still, Turner said, 'Yes, I see that. And maybe he'd drop in here on the way, would he? Check on his own room; brew up a cup of tea.'

  'That's it,' said Gaunt, 'always ready to oblige.' He opened the door. 'Well, I'll be leaving you to it.'

  'You stay here,' said Turner, still watching him. 'You'll be all right. You stay and talk to me, Gaunt. I like company. Tell me about his disadvantages.'

  Returning the hair-dryers to their boxes, he pulled out a linen jacket, still on its hanger. A summer jacket; the kind that barmen wear. A dead rose hung from the buttonhole. 'What disadvantages?' he asked, throwing the rose into the wastebag. 'You can tell me, Gaunt,' and he noticed the smell again, the wardrobe smell he had caught but not defined, the sweet, familiar, continental smell of male unguents and cigar.

  'Only his childhood, that's all. He had an uncle.'

  'Tell me about the uncle.'

  'Nothing; only how he was daft. Always changing politics. He had a lovely way of narrative, Leo did. Told us how he used to sit down in the cellar in Hampstead with his uncle while the bombs were falling, making pills in a machine. Dried fruit. Squashed them all up and rolled them in sugar, then put them in the tins, see. Used to spit on them, Leo did, just to spite his uncle. My wife was very shocked when she heard that - I said don't be silly, that's deprivation. He hasn't had the love, see, not what you've had.'

  Having felt the pockets, Turner cautiously detached the jacket from the hanger and held the shoulders against his own substantial frame.

  'Little bloke?'

  'He's a keen dresser,' said Gaunt, 'Always well turned out, Leo is.'

  'Your size?'

  Turner held the jacket towards him, but Gaunt drew back in distaste.

  'Smaller,' he said, his eyes still on the jacket. 'More the dancer type. Butterfly. You'd think he wore pumps all the time.'

  'Pansy?'

  'Certainly not,' said Gaunt, very shocked again, and colour­ing at the notion.

  'How do you know?'

  'He's a decent fellow, that's why,' said Gaunt, fiercely. 'Even if he has done something wrong.'

  'Pious?'

  'Respectful, very. And about religion. Never cheeky or brash, although he was foreign.'

  'What else did he say about his uncle?'

  'Nothing.'

  'What else about his politics?' He was looking at the desk, examining the locks on the drawers.

  Tossing the jacket on to a chair, he held out his hand for the keys. Reluctantly Gaunt released them.

  'Nothing. I don't know nothing about his politics.'

  'Who says anything about him doing something wrong?'

  'You. All this hunting him. Measuring him; I don't fancy it.'

  'What would he have done, I wonder? To make me hunt him like this?'

  'God only knows.'

  'In his wisdom.' He had opened the top drawers. 'Have you got a diary like this?'

  It was bound in blue rexine and stamped in gold with the royal crest.

  'No.'

  'Poor Gaunt. Too humble?' He was turning the pages, work­ing back. Once he stopped and frowned; once he wrote some­thing in his black notebook.

  'It was Counsellors and above, that's why,' Gaunt retorted. 'I wouldn't accept it.'

  'He offered you one, did he? That was another ofhis fiddles, I suppose. What happened? He scrounged a bundle did he, from Registry, and handed them out to his old chums on the Ground Floor. "Here you are, boys: the streets are paved with gold up there. Here's a keepsake from your old winger." Is that the way of it, Gaunt? And Christian virtue held you back, did it?' Closing the diary, he pulled open the lower drawers.

  'What if he did? You 've no call to go rifling through his desk there, have you? Not for a little thing like that! Pinching a hand­ful of diaries; well, that's hardly all the world, is it?' His Welsh accent had jumped all the hurdles and was running free.

  'You're a Christian man, Gaunt. You know how the devil works better than I do. Little things lead to big things, don't they? Pinch an apple one day, you'll be hijacking a lorry the next. You know the way it goes, Gaunt. What else did he tell you about himself? Any more little childhood reminiscences!' He had found a paper knife, a slim, silver affair with a broad, flat handle, and he was reading the engraving by the desk lamp.

  'L. H. from Margaret. Now who was Margaret, I wonder?'

  'I never heard of her.'

  'He was engaged to be married once, did you know that?'

  'No.'

  'Miss Aickman. Margaret Aickman. Ring a bell?'

  'No.'

  'How about the Army. Did he tell you about that?'

  'He loved the Army. In Berlin, he said, he used to watch the cavalry going over the jumps. He loved it.'

  'He was in the infantry, was he?'

  'I don't really know.'

  'No.'

  Turner had put the knife aside, next to the blue diary, made another note in his pocket-book and picked up a small flat tin of Dutch cigars.

  'Smoker?'

  'He liked a cigar. Yes. That's all he smoked, see. Always carried cigarettes, mind. But I only ever saw him smoke those things. There was one or two in Chancery complained, so I hear. About the cigars. Didn't fancy them. But Leo could be stubborn when he had the mind, I will say.'

  'How long have you been here, Gaunt?'

  'Five years.'

  'He was in a fight in Cologne. That in your time?'

  Gaunt hesitated.

  'Amazing the way things are hushed up here, I must say. You give a new meaning to the "need to know", you do. Everyone knows except the people who need to. What happened?'

  'It was just a fight. They say he asked for it, that's all.'

  'How?'

  'I don't know. They say he deserved it, see. I heard from my predecessor: they brought him back one night, you couldn't hardly recognise him, that's what he said. Serve him right, he said; that's what they told him. Mind you, he could be pugnacious, I'm not denying it.'

  'Who? Who told him?'

  'I don't know. I didn't ask. That would be prying.'

  'Often fighting, is he?'

  'No.'

  'Was there a woman involved? Margaret Ajckman perhaps?'

  'I don't know.'

  'Then why's he pugnacious?'

  'I don't know,' Gaunt said, torn once more between sus­picion and a native passion for communication. 'Why are you then for that matter?' he muttered, venturing aggression, but Turner ignored him.

  'That's right. Never pry. Never tell on a friend. God wouldn't like it. I admire a man who sticks to his principles.'

  'I don't care what he's done,' Gaunt continued, gathering courage as he went. 'He wasn't a bad man. He was a bit sharp maybe, but so he would be, being continental, we all know that.' He pointed to the desk and the open drawers. 'But he wasn't bad like this.'

  'No one is. Know that? No one's ever this bad. That's what mercy's about. We're all lovely people, really. There's a hymn about that, isn't there? One of the hymns he used to play, and you and I used to sing, Gaunt, before we grew up and got elegant. That's a lovely thing about hymns: we never forget them, do we. Like limericks. God knew a thing or two when he invented rhyme I will say. What did he learn when he was a kid, tell me that? What did Leo learn on his uncle's knee, eh?'

  'He could speak Italian,' Gaunt said suddenly, as if it were a trump card he had b
een holding back.

  'He could, could he?'

  'And he learnt it in England. At the Farm School. The other kids wouldn't speak to him, see, him being German, so he used to go out on a bicycle and talk to the Italian prisoners of war. And he's never forgotten it, never. He's got a lovely memory, I tell you. Never forgets a word you say to him, I'm sure.'

  'Wonderful.'

  'A real brain he could have been, if he'd had your advantages.'

  Turner looked at him blankly. 'Who the hell says I've got any advantages?'

  He had opened another drawer; it was filled with the small junk of any private life in any office: a stapler, pencils, elastic bands, foreign coins and used railway tickets.

  'How often was choir, Gaunt? Once a week, was it? You'd have a nice sing-song and a prayer and afterwards you'd slip out and have a beer down the road, and he'd tell you all about himself. Then there was outings, I suppose. Coach trips, I expect. That's what we like, isn't it, you and I? Something corporate but spiritual. Coaches, institutions, choirs. And Leo came along, did he? Got to know everyone, hear their little confidences, hold their little hands. Quite the entertainer he must have been by the sound of it.'

  All the while they spoke, he continued to record items in his notebook: sewing materials, a packet of needles, pills of different colours and descriptions. Fascinated despite himself, Gaunt drew nearer.

  'Well, not only that, see. Only I live on the top floor, there's a flat up there: it should have been Macmullen's but he can't occupy, him having too many children, they couldn't have them running wild up there now, could they? We practised in the Assembly Room first, Fridays, see, that's on the other side of the lobby next to the pay office, and then he'd come on up after, for a cup of tea, like. Well, you know, I had a few cups here too for that matter; quite a joy to pay back it was, after all he done for us; things he bought for us and that. He loved a cup of tea,' said Gaunt simply. 'He loved afire too. I always had that feeling, he loved a family, him not having one.'

  'He told you that, did he? He told you he'd no family?'

  'No.'

  'Then how do you know?'

  'It was too evident to be talked about, really. He'd no edu­cation either; dragged up really, you could tell.'

  Turner had found a bottle of long yellow pills and he was shaking them into the palm of his hand, sniffing cautiously at them.

  'And that's been going on for years, has it? Cosy chats after practice?'

  'Oh no. He didn't hardly notice me really, not till a few months ago and I didn't like to press him at all, him being a dip, see. It's only recently he took the interest. Same as Exiles.'

  'Exiles?'

  'Motoring Club.'

  'How recent? When did he take you up?'

  'New Year,' Gaunt said, now very puzzled. 'Yes. Since Janu­ary I'd say. He seems to have had a change of heart January.'

  'This January?'

  'That's right,' Gaunt said, as if he were seeing it for the first time. 'Late January. Since he started with Arthur, really. Arthur's had a great influence on Leo. Made him more contemplative, you know. More the meditating kind. A great improvement, I'd say. And my wife agrees, you know.'

  'I'll bet. How else did he change?'

  'That's it really. More reflective.'

  'Since January when he took you up. Bang: in comes the New Year and Leo's reflective.'

  'Well, steadier. Like he was ill. We did wonder, you know. I said to my wife' - Gaunt lowered his voice in reverence at the notion - 'I wouldn't be surprised if the doctor hadn't warned him.'

  Turner was looking at the map again, first directly and then sideways, noting the pin-holes of vanished units. In an old bookcase lay a heap of census reports, press cuttings and maga­zines. Kneeling, he began working through them.

  'What else did you talk about?'

  'Nothing serious.'

  'Just politics?'

  'I like serious conversation myself,' Gaunt said. 'But I didn't somehow fancy it with him, you didn't quite know where it would end.'

  'Lost his temper, did he?'

  The cuttings referred to the Movement. The census reports concerned the rise of public support for Karfeld.

  'He was too gentle. Like a woman in that way; you could disappoint him dreadfully;just a word would do it. Vulnerable he was. And quiet. That's what I never did understand about Cologne, see. I said to my wife, well, I don't know I'm sure, but if Leo started that fight, it was the devil got hold of him. But he had seen a lot, hadn't he?'

  Turner had come upon a photograph of students rioting in Berlin. Two boys were holding an old man by the arms and a third was slapping him with the back of his hand. His fingers were turned upwards, and the light divided the knuckles like a sculpture. A line had been drawn round the frame in red ball point.

  'I mean you never knew when you were being personal, like,' Gaunt continued, 'touching him too near. I used to think sometimes, I said to my wife as a matter of fact, she was never quite at home with him herself, I said, "Well, I wouldn't like to have his dreams."'

  Turner stood up. 'What dreams?'

  'Just dreams. Things he's seen, I suppose. They say he saw a lot, don't they? All the atrocities.'

  'Who does?'

  'Talkers. One of the drivers, I think. Marcus. He's gone now. He had a turn with him up there in Hamburg in forty-six or that. Shocking.'

  Turner had opened an old copy of Stern which lay on the bookcase. Large photographs of the Bremen riots covered both pages. There was a picture of Karfeld speaking from a high wooden platform; young men shouted in ecstasy.

  'I think that bothered him, you know,' Gaunt continued, looking over his shoulder. 'He spoke a lot about Fascism off and on.'

  'Did he though?' Turner asked softly. 'Tell us about that, Gaunt. I'm interested in talk like that.'

  'Well, just sometimes.' Gaunt sounded nervous. 'He could get very worked up about that. It could happen again, he said, and the West would just stand by; and the bankers all put in a bit, and that would be it. He said Socialist and Conservative, it didn't have no meaning any more, not when all the decisions were made in Zurich or Washington. You could see that, he said, from recent events. Well, it was true really, I had to admit.' For a moment, the whole sound-track stopped: the traffic, the machines, the voices, and Turner heard nothing but the beating of his own heart.

  'What was the remedy then?' he asked softly.

  'He didn't have one.'

  'Personal action for instance?'

  'He didn't say so.'

  'God?'

  'No, he wasn't a believer. Not truly, in his heart.'

  'Conscience?'

  'I told you. He didn't say.'

  'He never suggested you might put the balance right? You and he together?'

  'He wasn't like that,' Gaunt said impatiently. 'He didn't fancy company. Not when it came to... well, to his own matters, see.'

  'Why didn't your wife fancy him?'

  Gaunt hesitated.

  'She liked to keep close to me when he was around, that's all. Nothing he ever said or did, mind; but she just liked to keep close.' He smiled indulgently. 'You know how they are,' he said. 'Very natural.'

  'Did he stay long? Did he sit and talk for hours at a time? About nothing? Ogling your wife?'

  'Don't say that,' Gaunt snapped.

  Abandoning the desk, Turner opened the cupboard again and noted the printed number on the soles of the rubber overshoes.

  'Besides he didn't stay long. He liked to go off and work night times, didn't he? Recently I mean. In Registry and that. He said to me: "John," he said, "I like to make my contri­bution." And he did. He was proud of his work these last months. It was beautiful; wonderful to see, really. Work half the night sometimes, wouldn't he? All night, even.'

  Turner's pale, pale eyes rested on Gaunt's dark face.

  'Would he?'

  He dropped the shoes back into the cupboard and they clattered absurdly in the silence.

  'Well, he'd a lot to
do, you know; a great lot. Loaded with responsibilities, Leo is. A fine man, really. Too good for this floor; that's what I say.'

  'And that's what happened every Friday night since January. After choir. He'd come up and have a nice cup of tea and a chat, hang about till the place was quiet, then slip off and work in Registry?'

  'Regular as clockwork. Come in prepared, he would. Choir practice first, then up for a cup of tea till the rest had cleared out like, then down to Registry. "John," he'd say. "I can't work when there's bustle, I can't stand it, I love peace and quiet to be truthful. I'm not as young as I was and that's a fact." Had a bag with him, all ready. Thermos, maybe a sand­wich. Very efficient man, he was; handy.'

  'Sign the night book, did he?'

  Gaunt faltered, waking at long last to the full menace in that quiet, destructive monotone. Turner slammed together the wooden doors of the cupboard. 'Or didn't you bloody well bother? Well, not right really, is it? You can't come over all official, not to a guest. A dip too, at that, a dip who graced your parlour. Let him come and go as he pleased in the middle of the bloody night, didn't you? Wouldn't have been respectful to check up at all, would it? One of the family really, wasn't he? Pity to spoil it with formalities. Wouldn't be Christian, that wouldn't. No idea what time he left the build­ing, I suppose? Two o'clock, four o'clock?'

  Gaunt had to keep very still to catch the words, they were so softly spoken.

  'It's nothing bad, is it?' he asked.

  'And that bag of his,' Turner continued in the same terribly low key. 'It wouldn't have been proper to look inside, I sup­pose? Open the thermos, for instance. The Lord wouldn't fancy that, would he? Don't you worry, Gaunt, it's nothing bad. Nothing that a prayer and a cup of tea won't cure.' He was at the door and Gaunt had to watch him. 'You were just playing happy families, weren't you; letting him stroke your leg to make you feel good.' His voice picked up the Welsh intonation and lampooned it cruelly. '"Look how virtuous we are... How much in love... Look how grand, having the dips in... Salt of the earth, we are... Always something on the hod... And sorry you can't have her, but that's my privi­lege." Well, you've bought it, Gaunt, the whole book. A guard they called you: he'd have charmed you into bed for half a crown.' He pushed open the door. 'He's on compassionate leave, and don't you forget it or you'll be in hotter water than you are already.'

 

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